part 1

The alarm blares on. His arm automatically reaches for her as his first thought even before he can open his eyes. The other side of the bed is empty, and he stirs completely awake when he can't find her anywhere in the room.

Going on autopilot, he wipes the sleep from his eyes and gets to his feet to search for her like it's second nature despite the heavy fog weighing on his half-dazed mind.

The soft lull of her voice, and the background melody of the cello, float in the air and greet him as soon as he opens the door. Her back is facing him, hands busy stirring around the pan, as her humming and the shuffles she's making in the kitchen fill the silence of what used to be his usual quiet mornings.

Kai pauses, caught off guard and rendered immobile by the sight. Milly, in his kitchen. Singing. Making breakfast.

For him.

He's not used to this. Waking up to someone. Seeing a woman at his place as early as this. Sharing a space.

Actually loving it.

He might never get used to this—to this side of her.

To this side of him.

The door creaks when he steps out, and Milly immediately stops humming and turns to his direction.

A sweet, gentle smile lights up her face upon seeing him. "Hi! Morning, baby."

His heart flips, dips, and somersaults.

He'll never get used to that either.

His brows furrow, running his eyes around the kitchen and what she's prepared so far.

"Aga mo nagising," he comments. "Natulog ka ba?"

She's wearing an apron, his apron, underneath his fucking shirt as she moves around the kitchen, his kitchen. Now theirs.

It's too early for this. To be feeling like this.

His mind shuts down even more.

"A few hours. I'm making your brunch, so you won't have to. Male-late ka na. Go wash up. This is about done, too."

She turns away from him to continue what she's doing, but Kai stays planted, too entranced by the view to comprehend with his half-foggy mind what's going on.

In Baguio, he's always the first one to get up and prepare their breakfast.

In all their trysts, he's always the one to make their dinner.

Since he moved out, no one has ever taken care of him anymore.

This is the first time he—

"Babe?"

Kai snaps out of his reverie.

Milly darts to the wall clock. "Male-late ka. Mag-ayos ka na."

That gets him moving. Mind still hazy, and overwhelmingly full of her and her singsong voice, and how she's driving him mad so early in the morning, he starts his day.

***

The table is already set, and Milly's seated, waiting for him, when he comes out again, freshly showered and now in his usual work attire consisted of black button-ups and trousers.

He leans and plants a kiss on her lips before he takes the seat beside her. "Morning."

"Morning. Feeling well? Think you can go to work?"

That feels surreal too. Being asked how he's feeling. Being considered.

This isn't the first breakfast they had together. And this isn't the first time Milly has ever showed her care and concern for him.

But why does it feel so different now?

Is it because he can still hear her whispers, half-dazed and half-sleepy, telling him goodnight as she proceeds to caress his face and plant a soft kiss on his lips before she snuggled against him?

Or is it because he can still feel her head against his chest as she fell asleep last night, the scent of her shampoo clinging to his nose like a midnight oil?

Get your fucking grips on, he tells himself but fails.
It's not the sleep deprivation. It's just her effect on him in general.

"'Wag na lang kaya ako pumasok? Let's go back to bed." And repeat last night, he doesn't say.

Milly's forehead knits down in worry. "You wanna rest na lang?" With you, yeah. "You can't work ba?"

"Kaya naman pero..."

He pauses to study her and the expectant look on her face. He remembers the sight that greeted him, the care, the consideration, the effort, and his chest warms again. Fucking hell.

"Ang hirap mo iwan."

Milly blinks in surprise. Her eyes widen ever so softly like he said something unusual, and then her face melts into the softest of smiles.

She lifts a finger to brush his hair to the side, and his attention lands on the bronze ring glinting bright against her skin. His ring.

His shirt. His ring. His woman.

His.

All his.

And he's supposed to leave her in a few minutes?

"That's the sweetest thing anyone has ever told me." Milly grabs his hand and presses a kiss to his knuckles. "But I don't want to get you into trouble talaga. I'll still be here later. Hintayin kita umuwi."

Again, his breath holds.

Does she even know what she's doing?

Way too early, he tells himself. But fuck it.

"Ayaw mo ba talaga?"

"Ng?"

"Wala."

The image of her wearing his shirt and his apron resurfaces in his mind again.

"Bagay naman sa 'yo."

"Alin?"

"Wala nga."

Her brows furrow. "Babe, are you okay? Inaantok ka pa yata."

No, he doesn't think he's okay.

When he asked her to stay the night and sleep beside him, he'd have to admit. He wasn't able to think and prepare himself for the morning after. He wasn't sure what he was expecting to see, but it certainly wasn't this.

Not Milly bringing to life a future dream that he had happily given up on since he'd come to grips with his
feelings for her.

He was so sure that he would have to leave for work while she's sleeping, but just thinking about how she made sure to wake up earlier than he would... so she could prepare his meal...

Yeah, no. He's not okay.

It's a simple gesture, but it tells a lot about the shift in their relationship.

He chuckles and shakes his head.

Too early, he reminds himself. He can't do this. He'll push her away.

He's okay with her conditions, he reminds himself too. This is the farthest they can go. He's fine with that. But damn if she's not making it so difficult to want more.

"What are you going to do after I leave?" he says, to change the subject, as he picks up the utensils and tries the food she prepared.

"Hmm. I don't have my laptop with me, so I'll probably just play some instruments. I'll also change the curtains and sheets. It's high time."

"Why don't you just sleep in?"

"I feel bad doing that. Ikaw nga you're operating on little to no sleep."

"'Di naman 'to yung unang beses. Stop worrying about it. Go back to bed 'pag alis ko."

"I guess I can take a nap," she says as an afterthought. "Come home early, okay? I'll be bored without you. Wait, shit. Does this feel too domestic na ba?"

Now, she notices.

Kai doesn't answer.

Because it does. It fucking does. And it scares him how much he likes it.