It felt devastating to hold my love in my arms only to lose him once again.

Perhaps we were destined to experience the same cycle in a loop as punishment for our past lives. But what could be so bad to deserve such a cruel fate?

It broke my heart to see Almec pass by and not be able to catch up to him. I could see his pain so clearly in his eyes when he ignored me, yet every time I tried to reach out to him he disappeared.

I must be reading something wrong. There must be a solution. I told my wolf, beginning to read Almec's family book for the fourth time that day.

"I'm afraid that if they had found a solution, Almec would already know what it was," my wolf replied.

You're not being helpful at all today. I threw the book on the library table and stood up, beginning to walk around the armchair. There is a way to help him, I know.

"How can you be so sure?"

Yesterday, before Gaspard ruined it, the lycan seemed to have recognized me, it wasn't the same violent lycan I met before. I refuse to believe that he is a beast without feelings. Can't even normal wolves enter a feral state?

"The connection between the wolf and its human has to be very damaged for that to happen, but it is possible."

Exactly and I bet the connection between Almec and the lycan must be in the worst possible state.

"So you think it's possible to reason with the lycan in the same way as a normal wolf?"

We don't lose anything by trying. I answered, standing behind the armchair and resting my forehead against the backrest. At this point, I'm willing to try anything.

"It might work, but it won't be easy to convince Almec." My wolf finally agreed with me. "I'd say you should start convincing him as soon as possible if you want to see any results this year."

I raised my head and stretched my arms to shake off the tiredness.

Let's go now, I said, lit with the flame of new hope.

Even if the odds were not in my favor, I was ready to fight to get Almec back once and for all.

Even if he had already given up, I wasn't going to do the same.

The flame gradually weakened, as did Almec's scent.

Every time I thought I had found him, Almec vanished. I swore I had heard his voice, or seen his back, however after running towards him I always found an empty room.

Either Almec was an expert escape artist or I was already hallucinating because of how much I missed him.

Moon Goddess, send me a sign, I prayed.

She must have felt sorry for me because just then Khalia appeared in the hallway, carrying a basket of sheets.

"You look like shit," she told me, looking me up and down.

"Thank you, I'm having the best day of my life," I answered, fixing my hair with my hands. "Did you see Almec by any chance?"

"I saw him many times, apparently today he is swamped, I swear he doesn't stop moving from one place to another."

"Really? That's a surprise."

"You're in a bad mood, I got it, there's no need for so much sarcasm." Khalia put the basket on the floor. "What do you need?"

"I need to know where my husband is. I've been chasing him for hours."

"Oh, that's why he doesn't stop running. Now he's in your room, he told me he was going out to dinner somewhere else today. If you hurry over there you might catch him before he finishes getting ready."

"Thank you," I said to Khalia, giving her a big hug. "You're a lifesaver."

***

My lungs were fighting for their lives when I reached the door to my room, if it weren't for the perfect opportunity to catch Almec I would have stopped a long time ago.

I entered the room carefully to avoid making any noise. Almec wasn't there but his scent was too strong, so I took the opportunity to close the door behind me and lock it.

"Are you here, amor?" I asked out loud, knowing from the noise coming from the bathroom that he was.

"I was just about to leave," Almec replied in a sharp tone as he left the bathroom.

I expected to see him dressed formally but he was wearing his classic black cargo pants and a white t-shirt. That meant he was probably going to dinner alone or with someone he didn't really care about.

"Can't you pay attention to me for at least a few minutes?" I asked.

"I can't and you know why." Almec grabbed his jacket and headed towards the door.

Allowing him to escape once again was not an option so I stood in front of him, blocking his way.

"You mean this?" I asked him, raising my bandaged arm. "It's a superficial cut, Demian only put a bandage on it because he was afraid that you would get angry with him if he didn't."

"It doesn't matter. Even if I wouldn't have left a mark, I hit you, that's what can't happen again."

"And it won't happen again." I tried to grab his hand but he avoided me. "If you would just listen to the idea I have. I think there may be a way to communicate with the lycan."

"No. Don't even think about that." Almec walked past me, reaching the door. "I know you, Valentina, you are going to put yourself at risk once again when there is no way to save me."

"What am I supposed to do then?" I yelled at him. "Give up on you? On our marriage? Because there's no point in me being your wife if you're going to spend the rest of my life ignoring me."

"Maybe I made a mistake by being selfish and marrying you."

My heart dropped. The pain was so much that my legs almost gave up.

"You didn't mean that," I whispered, holding back my tears. "You're just confused now."

Almec looked down at the doorknob as if he were embarrassed.

"I love you, that will never change," he said. "But having you by my side puts you in great danger."

"I am a Daughter of the Moon, I would be in danger even if you are not near me. My powers put me at greater risk than you."

"That doesn't take away the fact that I'm a threat." Almec tried to open the door, discovering that it was locked.

"You're going to need this to get out," I told him, showing him the key. "Let me go with you and I'll open the door."

"I can always break down the door."

"Do you really want to confirm that you are the monster others say you are?" I asked, approaching him.

That was a low blow, I knew, but it was also the only way to convince Almec to take me with him and I wasn't ready to let him get away once again.

"It's an important meeting." He released the handle and stood in front of me.

"Then let me support you." I kissed his mate mark. "That's what I'm here for."

"But you're not going to ask any questions." Almec gave up, extending his hand with his palm facing up. "You better not talk either. I'd rather not have more problems today."

"Do you think I would bring you trouble?" I asked him, giving him the key.

"Generally I wouldn't, but I don't think you'd really like the person I'm having the meeting with." Almec opened the door and motioned for me to go out first.

"Kilma," I muttered, clenching my fists.

"I don't want any arguments."

"I won't start any fight but if he attacks first I won't stay silent."

"If Kilma tells you anything, I'll take care of him," Almec said, walking past me. "Now hurry up, I want to get this over with as soon as possible."

Almec made sure to keep a wide distance between us, every time I quickened my pace, he did the same, leaving me behind.

It wasn't difficult for me to realize that the only reason he allowed me to go with him was because he knew I wasn't going to give up. And also that way he could keep an eye on me.

I tried to start a conversation several times only to receive Almec's cold looks instead of his words. I had no choice but to give up when we left the mansion, at least the singing of the birds and the moonlight kept me company.

We went into the forest. I was about to ask why when I remembered that I wasn't going to get an answer.

"He probably wants to keep the meeting secret," my wolf told me as we walked through the trees.

Still, being alone in the forest with Kilma doesn't please me at all. I answered, looking in all directions.

"You're fifteen minutes late." That was the first thing Kilma said to Almec when we arrived at the meeting point.

I honestly didn't understand how they were able to find any difference between the reference tree and the rest. To me, it looked exactly the same as the others.

"I had something else to do," Almec replied, standing in front of me.

"Something or someone?" Kilma asked, tilting his head to meet me. He smirked at me, looking unimpressed.

"That's none of your business," Almec growled at Kilma.

"Whatever you say, alpha." Kilma raised his hands in a sign of surrender. "I was just curious."

That smug smile was so annoying to me, how I would have loved to be able to erase it with my fist.

You promised Almec that you weren't going to start any fights. I told myself, taking a deep breath.

"Why did you make me come here?" Almec asked, sounding impatient.

"Those four don't say much, or at least they don't say anything important in front of me, but I found something I thought you might want to see." Kilma took his cell phone out of his pocket.

I moved a little to the right to see better.

"Your cell phone? It better not be a waste of my time." Almec put his arm in front of me, preventing me from continuing to advance.

"I wasn't going to steal from them, I'm not stupid, I know that would have ruined my act. It's not that hard to get along with them, all they do is criticize our people and complain that you still didn't accept their proposal." Kilma finished finding what he was looking for and gave his cell phone to Almec. "That was among Romeo's belongings, hidden well at the bottom of the drawer."

I stood on my tiptoes so I could see the photo. It was difficult to see anything with Almec's body blocking my vision, all I could recognize was some kind of jewelry stained with blood.

"What's that?" I whispered to Almec.

"Ezra's necklace. His grandmother had given it to him, he wouldn't take it off for nothing in the world." Almec returned the cell phone to Kilma. "Well done, bring me a physical copy of the photo when you have time. If you have nothing else to say, you can leave."

Almec was holding back. I could clearly see the muscles in his back clenching and I recognized the anger in his tone of voice.

"Nothing more. I'll leave before they get suspicious." Kilma walked past us without even giving me one of his disgusted grimaces.

It was strange to see him so calm, although inside he probably must have been scared by Almec's reaction.

The alpha's dangerous rage was no secret to any of the pack members and no one would have dared to confront him when his anger began to rise.

"I'm so sorry," I told Almec when we were finally alone.

"It's not your fault," he answered, walking away from me.

"If you want to talk about it—"

"Just leave me alone!" Almec snapped, looking down to hide his red eyes. "Go back to the mansion, Valentina. Now."

He raised his head and I could see the plea in his eyes.

Leaving him behind broke my heart but ignoring his pleas also made me feel like I was a horrible mate.

"Don't stay here alone for too long," I told him before turning my back on him and starting to walk away.

I continued walking without looking back, knowing that if I fell into temptation I would not be able to keep my word.

The first trees were left behind. The moonlight returned to me and with it came the howls of the lycan.

A chill ran through my body as the lycan's cry grew louder.

I took another step and the ground shook beneath me. The sound of trees breaking was so clear that I could have heard it from inside the mansion.

I can't leave him alone.

The cry of my wolf accompanied my thoughts. We could not bear the pain of abandoning our mate in such a fragile state.

"Go back to him," my wolf told me.

I, who was already ready to run, returned to Almec at full speed.

I had to jump over broken branches and dodge fleeing animals to reach him. And when I found him I knew there was nothing I could do to calm him down.

The lycan broke everything around him. Trees, animals, and rocks, everything was a target for him.

"He won't recognize us in that state," my wolf told me.

Intervening was risky for me and if something happened, Almec would never forgive himself. There was no one in danger as long as the lycan didn't come out of the forest, the best option was to wait for him to calm down on his own.

I hid in a hole formed by two fallen trees, that way I stayed close to Almec but safe from the wrath of the lycan.

I don't know how much time passed, but it must have been long because my eyes were already closing on their own when the sounds stopped.

I tried to fight to stay awake, yet my tiredness got the better of me. Before falling asleep I managed to hear Almec's voice.

"Why do I always make you suffer? I really am a monster."