Chapter 13 - Someone asks Zhan for help

Zhan and his employees handled the lunch rush as usual, and now they had some time to rest and relax during their one-hour lunch break. But for Zhan, the break was over after just ten minutes. Because someone came to the restaurant, knocked on the door and asked to talk to Zhan.

When Zhan looked to see who wanted to talk to him, he immediately recognized the man It was Yibo's brother Wang Haikuan. "Please, follow me." Said Zhan after a short greeting and went with him to his office. They sat down and after Sonya brought them a coffee, Zhan asked, "What do you want to talk to me about?"

"First of all, thank you for taking time out of your break to talk to me. It is, as you can probably guess, about Yibo." Haikuan replied.

"That's what I thought. Now, were you going to explain why you weren't at our housewarming party for our new appartment on Saturday and want me to explain it to Yibo?"

"No, not really. I wasn't there because I was in Chicago due to problems at the company."

"I see. So what is it about then?"

"I wanted to ask for your help. I'm moving back to Beijing in two months and I'd like to start a serious relationship with my little brother. But after promising him so many times to come back and be his big brother, I'm sure he doesn't believe me now. Rightly so, of course. But I have tried again and again to approach him. But without success. He doesn't talk to me. He never calls me or answers the phone when I call him. He ignores my messages. I wasn't even invited to his wedding."

"Mhhh, why did you always promise him that you would come back and be a big brother to him finally and then not keep it?"

"I submitted many requests to my CEO to transfer me to Beijing. But all the requests were rejected. I was told over and over again that they needed me in the Chicago company because of the business relationships with China and Taiwan. I really wanted to come back. But not as an unemployed man."

"I see. And is that how you explained it to Yibo?"

"He was too young then to understand. And as he got older, he didn't listen to me at all and just kept saying, 'Yes, yes.' You and his promises. You and your promises are as reliable as a pig can fly." Since then I have not dared to promise him anything. All I ever said was that I would soon keep my responsibility as a brother."

"That's just like a promise. You know Haikuan, Yibo is 26 years old now. So you didn't have time to be his brother for 26 years? Why, if things didn't work out with the move, didn't you call him all the time? Why no video chats? Why didn't you have him over during the vacations? It's hard for me to understand. And I wonder if Yibo was really important to you? Please be honest with me, okay? What we talk about here stays between us."

"You want me to be honest? Okay, I'm being honest. When my parents told me that mom was pregnant, I was really excited to have a little sibling. But then as the pregnancy progressed, I saw how bad my mom was. She was in a lot of pain all the time. She suffered from heartburn so bad that she hardly ate and became thinner and weaker. Then it was said that the baby might be born handicapped. And that was only the first 5 months of pregnancy. Then it went on. She could hardly move because of pain and was almost only crying in bed. But she wasn't crying because of the pain, she was crying because she was afraid for her unborn baby because her doctor advised her to end the pregnancy. She wanted this baby so much that she would rather have died than lose the baby. I was 17 years old and I had never been so scared in my life as I was during that time. I feared every day that my mother would die! I began to hate the baby for making my mom suffer so much. I hated it because my mom loved the baby so much that she was willing to die just so he could live."

"So you didn't love Yibo as a brother from the beginning. You were mad at him because your mom suffered so much because of him."

"Yes. Of course I know it's not his fault. But I didn't understand that at the time. I was 17 years old and too young to understand. I just saw my mom suffering and drifting further and further toward death."

"And when Yibo was born? How did you feel then?"

"I hated him. Once you hate someone, it's hard to turn it off. I went to the U.S. to study there so I wouldn't have to see Yibo."

"Phew, that's really hard. I can understand you, of course. But my God, Yibo was an innocent baby."

"I know. And that's why I feel so ashamed."

"And then? When did your attitude toward him change?"

"When I came home for the vacations after a year in the US. Yibo was just under 2 years old. When he saw me, he came running up to me. He had this bright laugh on his face. And he called out "My big brother. Big brother. Yes, my big brother." He spread his arms as he ran toward me shouting loudly. And my hatred disappeared. Suddenly there had been only love for him. I took him in my arms, he kissed my face and clung to me as our mother tried to take him away from me. He cried when she took him and screamed that he wanted to be with me, that he wanted to be with his big brother. This was so moving for me that I started crying. I took him back to me and he calmed down immediately. But my mom was scared for him because she knew how I felt about him before."

"So she didn't want you to get too close to him because she was afraid you would hurt him?"

"Yes. She didn't believe me that I had gotten over my hatred and just still loved him. I didn't get a chance from her to prove what Yibo meant to me. And when I finished my studies and got a job in the company, I often called and asked if I could have Yibo now and then, with me? But my mom was against it. She said she didn't want to leave me alone with him. She told me very clearly that she didn't want me to get too close to Yibo."

"Mhhh, I'm assuming you never told him about your mom being the wedge between you, right?"

"That's right."

"And your father?"

"My father always stood behind my mother. He loves Yibo more than anyone else in this world."

"More than you?"

"I don't know that. But I know how he feels about Yibo. He's not good at showing it. But it was him who always called Yibo his little miracle. Yibo only needed to cough once and he would run with him to the pediatrician. For the first 3 months after Yibo was born, my father slept in front of Yibo's crib every night and watched over him."

"That must have been hard for you. After all, you're their son too, and suddenly they treated you like an outcast because of the fear for your mother, because you were not able to love your little brother right away." Haikuan nodded. A tear rolled down his cheek. "Haikuan, if you really want to build a relationship with Yibo, I can only advise you to be open and honest with him. Tell him what you told me. Explain your feelings to him. Don't look for a way around it. But the direct way. The way of truth. Maybe Yibo won't understand at first. But he is very smart and will think about it and understand you for sure. With luck he will understand you immediately. But you will only find out if you talk to him. Involve him in everything you do from now on. Tell him you're moving back here soon and you need him to help you find a place to live. Tell him that you trust his judgment in finding an apartment. Watch his videos of his motorcycle races with him and praise him for his great performance at the races. Go to the park with him and let him show you a trick in skateboarding. Show interest in his hobbies. Get completely involved with him and don't take a step back if things don't work out right away. And most importantly, just tell him everything about you. He wants to get to know you. He wants to have something that makes him feel connected to you. He didn't even know you were gay until last Saturday. He found out by accident. He didn't let it show at that moment. But he told me later that night that he had no idea his brother was gay and was sad that no one told him."

"I'm going to do everything you say. And I'm not going to run away anymore. I want to be Yibo's big brother and a part of his life."

"Then do that. Don't let anyone stop you anymore. And certainly not from your parents! Yibo may be 26 years old. But he still needs a big brother a lot."

"Thanks."

"For what? I was just giving you my opinion. The rest is up to you."

"I thank you for not judging me and trying to understand me. And I thank you for giving me valuable advice."

"Just do your best, that's thanks enough."

"I will."

"So Haikuan. What's the situation? Are you hungry?"

"Um yeah a little."

"Good, then come with me. We'll both eat together now. Because I'm hungry too."

"Oh okay." Stuttered Haikuan. The two went back to the guest room and sat down at a table. Zhan let them bring the dish of the day and they ate together.

"Do you actually have a boyfriend?" Zhan wanted to know curiously.

"Um, no. Not so far."

"How long has it been since your last relationship?"

"About five years."

"That long?"

"Yes. I just haven't met anyone because I've been working so much."

"Mhhh, then I'll introduce you to Meng Yao soon."

"Huh?"

"Well, there's this guy. His name is Meng Yao and he's my age. He's cute. At least that's what I've been told. And he's totally into guys like you."

"Like me?"

"Yes. Wait I'll show you a picture of him." Zhan searched his phone for a picture and showed it to Haikuan. "Well, what do you say? Do you want me to introduce you to each other?"

Haikuan's face turned red with embarrassment. However, he nodded. "If he wants to get to know me too, then yes."

"We'll see in a minute." Zhan took a picture of Haikuan, sent it to Meng Yao and wrote, "This handsome man would like to meet you soon. Would you be interested?" Shortly after, the answer came. It was a clear, yes. "So he wrote me that he wants to meet you."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"And you don't think the age difference bothers him?"

"You don't look like a 43-year-old. And I hardly think it matters how big the age difference is between you. What matters is the feelings. But first you should get to know each other and then you can go from there."

"Sure, you're right. But can I ask you where you know him from?"

"I know him through culinary school."

"Ah okay. And can I maybe ask you what you think of my brother now that you know him a little bit."

"Yibo is absolutely cute, smart, hardworking, talented, honest, and totally awesome in general."

"Ah yes."

"Yibo really means a lot to me. Even though we've only known each other for a short time, he means an incredible amount to me."

"That's what I thought. The way your eyes light up when you talk about him, it's obvious to me that he's not just the accidental husband you have to put up with for 6 months."

"You want me to tell you something cheesy?"

"What would that be?"

"When I look into Yibo's eyes while he's smiling, it's like I can see through his eyes all the way into his soul. And he has the most beautiful and brightest soul you can imagine. And in his eyes you can see his kindness, his joy, his love and his trust. And is that cheesy?"

"It is. But at the same time, that's proof that you've recognized Yibo's true self. He usually hides what he thinks or feels from everyone. I know many who call him the Ice Prince because he doesn't let anyone get close to him. But your words describe a Yibo who is gentle as a feather and is deep inside full of feelings that he only lets those he cares about see."

"Now it's you who's being cheesy."

"Yes, isn't it?"

"Absolutely. Hahaha."

"It makes me feel good to know that you're by his side and he can be who he is with you."

"So it should be." Said Zhan with a smile. They finished their lunch and then Haikuan had to head back out as he had another appointment. But Zhan was sure that he will see Haikuan more often now. Because he believes that Haikuan really wants to build a relationship with Yibo. And he wishes for the brothers to make it.