"Hai, nama saya Diana."

-------

Aku memegang foto itu. Tangan kananku, dilekapkan pada bahagian dada kiriku.

"Kau adalah darahku, kau adalah jantungku. Kau adalah hidupku, lengkapi diriku, oh sayangku kau begitu...sempurna."

Mengapa pipiku seakan basah?

Aku mengalihkan pandangan ke arah cermin besar yang bertentangan dengan meja belajarku.

Oh? Aku sedang menangis rupanya.

Pita perakam yang masih memainkan suara milik Diana itu, aku biarkan ia terus bernyanyi.

"Awak boleh nyanyi satu lagu untuk saya tak?"

"Hehe. Imagination boleh?"

"Bolehhh."

"Oh, there she goes again
Every morning it's the same
You walk on by my house
I wanna call out your name."

Aku tersenyum. Aku masih ingat waktu itu. Hari-hari aku ke water cooler untuk mengintainya.

"I want to tell you how beautiful you are from where I'm standing
You got me thinking what we could because

I keep craving, craving, you don't know it but it's true
Can't get my mouth to say the words they want to say to you
This is typical of love
Can't wait anymore, I won't wait
I need to tell you how I feel when I see us together forever."

Aku bangun. Baju kepunyaan Diana yang ku gantung kemas di almari, aku keluarkan. Aku memeluknya, erat.

"In my dreams you're with me
We'll be everything I want us to be
And from there, who knows, maybe this will be the night that we kiss for the first time
Or is that just me and my imagination."

"In my dreams? Hahaha."

Belum pernah aku benar benar tidur sewaktu berbaring bersama di sebelahnya. Adrenalinku, langsung tidak pernah surut kepantasannya. Bagaimana aku mampu untuk melelapkan mata apabila kecintaanku ini sedang nyenyak tidur, di sebelahku?

"We walk, we laugh, we spend our time walking by the ocean side
Our hands are gently intertwined
A feeling I just can't describe
All this time we spent alone, thinking we could not belong to something so damn beautiful
So damn beautiful."

Aku renung jemariku. Tangan kecil inilah yang berjaya memautkan jari-jemarinya ke jari-jemari dia. Indah. Terlalu indah.

"I keep craving, craving, you don't know it, but it's true
Can't get my mouth to say the words they want to say to you
This is typical of love
Can't wait anymore, I won't wait
I need to tell you how I feel when I see us together forever

In my dreams, you're with me
We'll be everything I want us to be
And from there, who knows, maybe this will be the night
That we kiss for the first time
Or is that just me and my imagination

Imagination
Imagination...

In my dreams, you're with me
We'll be everything I want us to be
And from there, who knows, maybe this will be the night
That we kiss for the first time
Or is that just me and my imagination

I keep craving, craving, you don't know it, but it's true
Can't get my mouth to say the words they want to say to you."

Jeda. Aku masih tidak lupa. Aku waktu itu, benar benar terpaku melihat dia menyudahkan nyanyiannya. Aku terasa seakan satu keperitan, di sudut yang paling dalam di dalam hatiku.

"Mir, sedap tak?"

"Bukan setakat sedap. Tapi terlalu indah. Rasa macam nak duduk dengan Dee sampai bila-bila. Suara Dee macam dadah."

"Hahaha yelah tu."

"Iyaaaa."

Aku masih tak percaya. Bahkan aku tidak mahu percaya. Aku sudah kehilangan dia.

Fasa Kedua : Denial.