THE FOLLOWING IS A NON PROFIT, FAN
BASED PARODY

Dragon Ball, Dragon Ball Z, Dragon Ball GT, Dragon Ball Super And Yes Dragon Ball Z Abridged, are all owned by FUNimation, Toei Animation, Fuji TV, Shueisha, Akira Toriyama, And Team Four Star.

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A week has passed already. Everyone was trained and ready for the fight they were going to have. There was a fantastic cameraman named Larry and another person called Jimmy Firecracker, broadcasting the event. Everybody was on their way to the coordinates Cell have in live TV.

Goki: 🎶Got my wristbands on, and my boots are tied. Gone get my friends and fight a big guy. Doo, doo-doo it's fighting day🎶

(Y/N): Alright, Gohan you ready to go?

Gohan: Ready!

Goki: Let's go! (Flies off with you and Gohan following her)

///

Bardock: It's surprising how strong we got.

Gine: Yeah, it's surprise.

(F/N): Well, I hope we can all make it alive. Where's Vegeta?

Piccolo: I'm guessing Vegeta's already there waiting for us.

Goki: Hey Guys!

Everyone: Goki!

(Y/N): Wow, they're really depending you. No surprise, Cell is only after you.

Gohan: Yeah, the worst thing that could happen is if I fight Cell.

Bardock: ...So, are we ready to go?

Gohan: Yeah!

///

Jimmy: Jimmy Firecracker here, live from the Cell Games, presented by HETAP! Because apparently nobody took the job. But don't worry about me. Because Jimmy Firecracker corn and he don't give a fuck! He'll take any job! He'll take every job! He'll take YER job! And speaking of jobs...nobody else is here yet. Will Jimmy Firecracker have to get in that ring? Does Jimmy Firecracker have to SLAP that PERFECT JAWLINE?!?! (Sees car pulling up) It looks like Cell is saved from the wrath of Jimmy Firecracker as his first opponent has arrived. I'm receiving words that This. Is. Him, Folks! The Man! The Legend! The winner of the 24th World Martial Arts Tournament! MISTERR SATANNNN!

Perfect Cell: Maybe shouldn't have made this an open invite...

Mr. Satan: (dramatically steps on the ring)

Jimmy: The Champ has stepped up into the ring! Better update that TV-PG to TV-MA, 'cuz you're about to see a full blown massacre!

Mr. Satan: (calls down Jimmy)

Jimmy: Wait, What's this? The Champ is calling us down!

Both Jimmy and Larry run down to Mr. Satan

Jimmy: Mr. Satan, sir! What do you have to say to your adoring public?

Mr. Satan: First, to all the kids at home: DO NOT, recreate the violence you are about to see. Unless you but the new Mr. Satan Action Figure! On sale now, in stores everywhere!

Jimmy: And why, Mr. Satan, have you come here today?

Mr. Satan: Well, aside from being sponsored by HETAP, MR. SATAN NEVER BACKS DKWN FRKM A CHALLENGE! Not when it comes to evil! Vile! Wretched! Contemptible! Wicked! Monstrous! Inhuman!
Perfect Cell: Definitely shouldn't have made this an open invite...
Mr. Satan: Dishonorable! Nefarious...!

///

Gohan: Oh hey! It's Tenshinhan and Yamcha!

(Y/N): Hiya, guys?

Goki: How ya doin'?

Tien: Just heading towards the arena. Vegeta and Raditz passed us earlier; flipped us off. So that was a good way to start the morning.

Yamcha: Yeah, but we totally flipped him off back.

Tien: I flipped them off back. You just stood there laughing nervously.

Yamcha: Look, I don't have your mutually-sustained hate-boner for the guy, OK?

Tien: I don't have a HATE-BONER for him.

Yamcha: It's a pretty hateful boner.

///

Mr. Satan: ...Baneful! Iniquitous! Excecrable...! Villain like you!

{Crowd Cheers}

Perfect Cell: Now..,what d'ya haf'ta day ta THAT?!

Perfect Cell: ...

Mr. Satan: Oh, what's the matter? Satan gotcha tongue?

Perfect Cell: Are you sure about this?

Mr. Satan: Speak up, bug-boy!

Perfect Cell: You look like an extra from a budget porno flick. The kind where everyone gets tested afterwards. Even the cameraman.

Mr. Satan: Oh...um, you're—

Perfect Cell: Did they find you in the subway? Were you homeless? Did you get your start in bum fights?

Mr. Satan: This is getting oddly personal...

Perfect Cell: Do you have any actual friends? Any relationships at all that aren't about your money or your position?

Mr. Satan: ...I have a daughter.

Perfect Cell: That poor orphan.

Mr. Satan: Can we cut to commercial?

Vegeta: (Lands)

Jimmy: Another man has just touched down at the arena! (Runs to Vegeta) Uh-uh-sir! Are you looking to take on the terrifying Perfect Cell?

Vegeta: Get that mic out of my face before I give you colonoscopy with your camera.

Jimmy: (backs off) Message received, violent stranger! (Runs off)

Perfect Cell: Answer the question, Prince! Do you plan to take me on? Because I'm ready to throw down when you are, buddy! Come on, let's toss you through s mountain or five for old time's' sake.

Vegeta: ...

Perfect Cell: ...The old silent treatment, is it? Don't tell me you came all the way out here just to stand around and look mean~! (Chuckles) Ohhh~, I see! You took my advice~!

Vegeta: (growling)

Perfect Cell: You're waiting for...

Android 16: Goki!

Perfect Cell: Hm?

Android 16: (Lands)

Perfect Cell: My dear Android 16! How wonderful for you to join us today! Are you here for—

Android 16: Goki!

Perfect Cell: Of course; your little murder crush.

Android 16: Murder crush?

Perfect Cell: You want to kill her right?

Android 16: No, I'm just saying who's going.

Perfect Cell: Oh? Is that so?

Jimmy: And another mysterious stranger has appeared from thin air! Where do these people come from? And who does their hair?!

Mr. Satan: Obviously they're just hidin' begins rocks, waitin' to make their dramatic entrances, and usin' cranes and wires to make it look like they're flyin'. Similar to—

Bardock: (Lands) Ok what the hell?

Jimmy: Huh? And another one comes in here!

Mr. Satan: And I see you used wires too huh?

Bardock: Wires? No, we just fly look (Flies) it's no big deal.

Perfect Cell: And do you see any cranes or wires?

Mr. Satan: Uh...um...

And then the rest of the fighters land on the ground.

Perfect Cell: And our roster is complete. I'm actually excited for this. Let me just take care of this garbage here. And for all of you at home, I hope you made your mistakes happen. (Fires blast at Mr. Satan killing him including Jimmy and Larry)

(Y/N): Shit, I guess he's impatient.

Goki: Well, here I go guys! Before I go (Pulls you into a quick kiss) A kiss for good luck~! (Gets in ring)

Perfect Cell: Oh how adorable. I hope you enjoyed that kiss because it may be your last.

Goki: What?! (Runs back to you)

Perfect Cell: I was just— (Sees her make-out with you) *sigh* I wasn't kidding though...it was kinda on me then.

Goki: (Wipes mouth and gets on ring) Ok, now I'm ready!

Perfect Cell: I was actually going to wait until I fought your friends and family, and save you for the grand finale. But, I did Wait this long to fight you, so I won't bother.

Goki: Ok then get ready! (Aura intensifies shaking the ground)

Perfect Cell: Holy crap, Prince, do you feel that?!

Vegeta: Fuck off!

Perfect Cell: And she didn't even have to pump up, like some roiding, angsty child!

Trunks: Hurrgh...!

Perfect Cell: Well, Goki, now that you've shown me yours..,let me show you mine!

Goki: Yeah, whip out your power Cell! Let me feel it!

Perfect Cell: Oohoooh! Now you're speaking my language! (Aura flares up like Goki's)

(Y/N): 'What the hell just happened?'

Perfect Cell: So, you going to take a swing?

Goki: Yep! (Punches gut)

Perfect Cell: Oof!

They both clashed into battle trading blows landing them on each other. Goki then got launched by Cell, but caught herself and charged for Cell, leaving the after-image going through him.

Perfect Cell: Wait, so the after-image can't move, h-how do you even—?

Goki: Hah! (Kicks Cell)

Yamcha: Guys, She ringed out Cell!

Perfect Cell: (flies catching himself)

Yamcha: Oh...

Raditz: You forgot we can fly, didn't you?

Yamcha: No, but... I just have hope, okay? Is that so wrong?

Tien: The fact that you have any hope left in your life is your most admirable quality.

Yamcha: Huh, Thanks man

Perfect Cell: Yamcha, for the love of god! Don't thank him! (Flies up onto the ring) And as for you...clever little move there. But would you truly have been satisfied with a ring-out?

Goki: Well, Yeah. That's how I beat Piccolo, Tenshinhan, and...Chi-Chi. Some weird guy that wanted to marry me.

Perfect Cell: Fair enough, Goki; this is a test of skill as well as power. But if you're looking for a ring-out...you have to try a little bit harder than that.

Goki: Trust me, I tell Y/N the same thing we're in bed.

(Y/N): G-Goki! *blushes*

Bardock: ...What...

Perfect Cell: 'Oh! So this is the guy she's with? Is t that the same guy I sucked dry? How come he's more powerful than her? I'll figure that out later.' Oh...let's get back to fighting and forget what I said. (Uses multi-form technique to create four Cells)

Cell 1: I hope you're ready Goki
Cell 2: It's time to take you, Goki,
Cell 3: to Perfect University.
Cell 4. We'd say, "take you to school", but I think we're beyond the basics.

Gohan: Doesn't that make it...P.U.?

Cell 1: And we love that you got that.
Cell 2: And we love that you got that.
Cell 3: And we love that you got that.
Cell 4: And we love that you got that.

[There should be a GIF or video here. Update the app now to see it.]

The four Cell's dashed for Goki. Goki was dodging and blocking all of the Cells attacks. Tien was mad and pissed about this amount of bullshit that's happening in front of his face be his own technique. And we reach to wear Goki knocked all the Cells to the ground making three disappearance leaving one behind.

Goki: Looks like four divided by four is just one!

Gohan: Huh, she got that right.

Perfect Cell: Y'know, I was hoping you'd play along, maybe make four Gokis...but if you're just going to sink the showboat, I'm not going to bother.

Goki: Sorry, Cell. I'm here to win! And you're never going to beat me with your stolen techniques!

Perfect Cell: And what, are you gonna beat me with your stolen techniques?

Goki: What? I don't steal techniques!

(Y/N): Actually, Goki. Yeah you do.

Goki: Whhhaaaa...? What about the Kamehameha?

Krillin: That was Master Roshi.

Goki: The Solar Flare?

Tien: That's mine, thanks.

Goki: The Spirit Bo—

(Y/N): That's King Kai's. And the Kaioken.

Perfect Cell: Kaaaaa-meeeee...!

Goki: *gasp*... That's Yamcha's move!

Perfect Cell: ..,HAAAA-MEEEEE...!

Goki: Hey, Cell? Uh, pretty sure if you shoot that this close to the ground, it'll blow up the—

Perfect Cell: ...HAAAAAA! (Fires beam at Goki)

Goki: 'I should probably skidaddle.' (Jumps avoiding blast)

Perfect Cell: (moves beam upwards at Goki)

Goki: 'Oh!' *POP*

The beam kept going into space. He then stopped firing thinking he's won.

Perfect Cell: After all that...I killed her with her own technique. (Chuckles) Ain't That a kick in the hea-

Goki: (kicks head)

================================
(A/N): 🎵WE ARE PERFECT CELL!🎵 ALRIIIIIIIGHT!!!! First part of this done!