A/N: Cella makes the announcement of her very own tournament, one of which she has her own set of rules for.

Inside the Hyperbolic Time Chamber, Gohan, as a Super Saiyan, is continuing his training by throwing multiple ki blasts at the ground. As he landed on the ground and struggled to maintain his Super Saiyan form, the door suddenly flew open, and ChiChi walked inside.

ChiChi: Gohan, where are you?!

Gohan: Huh?

ChiChi: You've been slacking on your maths!

Gohan: Ch....ChiChi?! What are you doing here?

Piccolo stood on the side.

Piccolo: I.... I'm sorry, Go-chan. She overpowered me!

Gohan: Go-wha...?

ChiChi: if you fall behind on your vector calculus, how are you going to do your taxes?! We don't have the money to pay people for that!

Gohan: ChiChi, I'm trying to help save the world, here.

ChiChi: what world is there if you have no idea how to prove or disprove the Riemann hypothesis?!

Gohan: the same one we live in now? I guess?

ChiChi: If you wanted to squander your potential and disappoint everyone, you should just become a politician! Now, where's your mother?

Piccolo: yeah, where is she?

Perfect Cella: Yes...

Cella suddenly appeared behind ChiChi.

Perfect Cella: where's Goka?

ChiChi: huh?

She turned around and got slapped in the face by Cella and fell on the ground.

Gohan: oh, thank God.... I mean, OH, MY GOD!

A snapping sound was heard before Piccolo fell down on the ground.

Perfect Cella: my dear Gohan.

She stepped on Piccolo's head and crushed it, causing Piccolo to groan, and then floated up and lowered her foot above ChiChi's head.

Perfect Cella: there's something you should know...

She crushed ChiChi's head with her foot.

Perfect Cella: I...

Cella turned around and was suddenly seen with Goka's face and spoke in Goka's voice.

Goka: ...love you, son...

Gohan was seemingly sleeping in a bed with Goka standing right next to him. All that had just happened seemed to had been a dream.

Gohan: OH, MY GOD! AHH!

He said in his sleep,

Goka: why are you tripping, Gohan?

Gohan opened his eyes.

Gohan: a nightmare...

He got up on the bed.

Gohan: a terrible nightmare!

Goka: oh. Was it the one where ChiChi and Piccolo come in, then Cella shows up and kills them, and suddenly she has my face, and it's all like "Wha...?"

Gohan: Yes...

Goka: aw, it's all good! I've been having that one for a week!

Gohan lied back down on the bed.

Gohan: I think we've been in here too long.

Goka: Eh...

She looked at the wall, which was covered in red tally marks.

Goka: maybe just a little...

(Meanwhile).

You, Piccolo and Tien were still standing up on The Lookout.

Piccolo: so, a development: Cella's gone.

Bulma: wait. So, Trunks won?

Tien: no, she split. As in, grabbed her metaphorical shit and flew off.

Bulma: after killing Trunks?!

Piccolo: No.

Bulma: Vegeta?!

(Y/N): no, but she was very close to doing it though.

Piccolo: as far as things go, no one's dead.

Tien: yet.

Piccolo: I think she just got bored and left.

Bulma: so...we won, then?

Piccolo: no!

Tien: oh, my God!

Tien said as he rolled his eyes.

(Back on the Islands)

Trunks: HYAH!!!

Frostwing: well, I don't think I've seen a saiyan crack down this much before.

Trunks transformed into a Super Saiyan letting loose a burst of energy, emitting a bright light from high above the clouds as Vegeta and Krillin arrive and saw him down on his hands and knees.

Krillin: aw, geez. He's taking it pretty rough.

Vegeta: It's pathetic. Find some honor in defeat, for God's sake!

Krillin: view must be great from that glass house of yours.

He said under his breath.

Vegeta: hrm?!

Krillin: we should go check on him!

Vegeta landed in front of Trunks with her back turned away from him as he reverted back to his normal form.

Trunks: I... I'm sorry.

Krillin landed near Vegeta.

Trunks: I did my best, but...she just toyed with me! I couldn't do anything! And in the end...I wasn't even important enough to kill!

Vegeta: sucks, doesn't I...... I mean, sucks to be you! Yeah, that was it.

That last part she said under her voice.

Krillin: again, guys. Come on. It's just me, Krillin. Everyone's friend.

Android 16: I would like more friends...

Krillin & Trunks: huh?

Android 16: I seem to have misplaced mine when Cella... Oh.

Frostwing: well, if it's anything, this little pink girl can be.....

He looked and saw that Mewmis was gone.

Frostwing: and she's gone.

Android 16: oh

Krillin: well, quack, quack, big guy! Any friend of 18 is a friend of mine! Let's get you all patched up.

Android 16: you are the pluckiest duck. Together we shall be the Bird and the B. The B stands for...

Krillin: Brobot!

Android 16: Yes.

Trunks: what am I watching?

Vegeta: I don't know, but I hate it.

Trunks: well, hopefully he doesn't try and screw this one.

Vegeta: ha! No robo.

Frostwing: "sighs" good grief.

(Meanwhile).

Cella landed near a peaceful countryside with a man coming near a sink to splash water on his face and two birds drink water from a pond. Cella proceeded to level the entire area, causing the man to scream, and then telekinetically lifted a big rock from the ground and cut it into a large white marble and then divided the marble into multiple tiles. Cella then thrust one arm forward and made all the tiles fall on the ground, making a giant ring.

Perfect Cella: ahhh, yes. The perfect place for my Cella Ga.......

There was a short pause as Cella saw that one of the tiles was green.

Perfect Cella: son of an emerald whore, STARTING AGAIN!!!

She flew off.

(Up on the Lookout).

You were still standing there on the lookout, still angered about what had happened, not just Cella's comment on Trunks, but everything beforehand and you got tired standing there. You soon started walking to the side of the Lookout.

Piccolo: going somewhere?

(Y/N): I need to go, I need to pay Vegeta a visit.....

Frieza: ooooooo, we're gonna get drama.

Groudon: need us to come with?

(Y/N): it's probably best you and Kyogre don't be in the same area as me at that moment. It when I usually get mad, things don't always go well depending on the results.

Kyogre: oof, we should probably stay here then until you calm down.

Logan: I'm coming with. If I have to stand here on this lookout waiting for Goka and Gohan to get out of that damn Chamber, I may start blowing shit up.

Frieza: I'm just coming to see how this plays out.

(Y/N): fine, just be at a distance.

You soon turned to your Rayquaza form and flew off, with Frieza and Logan following.

(Outside Capsule Corp).

Mrs. Briefs was watering some flowers when Vegeta and Trunks landed behind her.

Mrs. Briefs: Vegeta! It's been so long! How was space?

Vegeta: hello, MILF.

Mrs. Briefs: Oh, Veggie. I'm a grandmother now! Call me GILF.

Vegeta: Your culture is so confusing.

Mrs. Briefs soon noticed trunks.

Mrs. Briefs: oh. And who is this lavender-haired gentlemen you've brought with you?

Trunks: umm...

Krillin and Frostwing soon arrived while carrying 16.:

Krillin: grandkid from the future. Leave the swinging for the park.

Mrs. Briefs: Phooey.

Krillin: Now, where Bulma at? We got an Android in desperate need of repair.

A bell rung.

Frostwing: hm?

Dr. Briefs came in riding a bicycle.

Dr. Briefs: why come to the acorn when you have the mighty oak! I taught Bulma everything she knows! Except the dangers of miscegenation, apparently.

Krillin: heck, if you're volunteering to help, we won't say no.

Dr. Briefs: Just try to the keep the house guests to a minimum. We just got rid of Yajirobe, and we barely have enough food to accommodate anyone...

A Capsule Corp. plane arrived and landed nearby. Roshi's voice could be heard from inside of it.

Master Roshi: what up, bitches?! Where my GILF at?!

Dr. Briefs: ...else.

Trunks, Vegeta, Frostwing, Krillin, Mrs. Briefs, ChiChi, Goten, Chiaotzu, Master Roshi, Oolong, Puar, and Yamcha had all headed inside of Capsul Corp. All while Dr. Briefs began working on 16.

(Just a reminder, Goten, in this story, was born sometime before Trunks).

Dr. Briefs: alrighty, I'm going to hook your internal OS up to my system. There may be some involuntary oil release.... that's natural. And...

He booted up 16's memory on his PC, which showed a screen filled with multiple birds as "Surfin Bird" by the Trashmen played on the monitor.

Dr. Briefs: good God! How long has this been running?!

Android 16: how long has what been running?

Dr. Briefs: we're just going to close that for a moment...

He closed the bird-infested file, with the monitor changing to a flaming image of Goka with the words "KILL" popping up on the screen while Dr. Gero's voice was heard saying "Kill Son Goka!" over and over.

Dr. Briefs: ...well, bird's the word!

He reopened the bird-infested file.

(With the others in the other room).

Trunks: ...and then she just flew off. Now we don't know where she is, or what she's planning.

Krillin: well, plus side, you're alive.

Trunks: oh, thanks for the consolation.

Krillin: hey, don't knock it. Sometimes you ain't so lucky.

Master Roshi: yeah.

Yamcha: yuh-huh.

Vegeta: mmm-hmm.

Chiaotzu: yup-yup-yup.

Trunks: wait a second. Have all five of you died?!

Krillin: oh ho ho, yeah! Chiaotzu and I twice. First round was basically just Piccolo's dad being a dick.

Chiaotzu: yep. Second time, I blew myself up trying to kill Vegeta's dumbass friend. Now he's out there making movies or some shit.

Trunks: oh, wait. So how did Yamcha die?

Yamcha: ah... Um...

Vegeta: oh, yes. Go ahead. Tell us how you died! I'll fact check.

Yamcha: on my feet, like a man!

Vegeta: well, you're half-right.

Suddenly, You arrived just outside of Capsule Corp, Making a large thud as you did, which somewhat shook the ground.

Trunks: well, dads here I guess.

Krillin: and boy does he look pissed!

Trunks: oh no......

Vegeta: oh boy, coming to bitch and piss at me again about not talking shit about our dumbass child?

(Y/N): bring me Vegeta!

Frostwing: he's gone Infinity War Thor, you should probably go out there before he plunges an axe through your chest.

Vegeta: oh I'm real scared.

She said before walking out.

Vegeta's mind: to hell if I'm going out by an axe.

She walked out there and saw you approaching.

Vegeta: so, what do you want from me this time? Have you come to just complain like the fail of a husband and father you....

Before she could even finish, you slammed your fish as hard as you could at Vegeta's stomach. Making her gasp for a moment as she took a few steps back while holding her now hurting stomach.

Frostwing and Logan: holy shit!

Frieza: ooooooo, stopping the bitch mid-sentences. Perfect.

You looked over your shoulder to Frieza while giving a glare.

Frieza: O_O

You soon looked back to Vegeta.

Krillin:....... and I thought your mom when she's mad was scary......

Trunks: this is honestly the most surprising thing for me right now.

(Y/N): just how f**king dumb and blinded by your pride can you be?! You could have done it! You could have finished Cella off and things wouldn't have come to this! But no! You let your stupid ass Pride get in the way. And when our son and Frostwing try to fix the mistake your ass made, you just had to get in the way and let her absorb 18. And where did that get you?! In the f**king dirt after Cella completely stomped you! We're you born with this retarded pride?! I hope your happy to live with the fact that you've probably succeed in killed everyone including your own family and you! Oh, but, you don't care, you did it just to try and prove yourself better than Goka in any way! Because you're the "Princess of All Saiyans!" Acreus! Had I known that you would have become from an asinine excuse of a mother to even risking everyone's lives to prove yourself, I would have let the Ginyu Force f**king kill you! But I didn't, I had to have some sort of damn attraction to you. Clearly a mistake was made!!!

Everyone looked in dead silence in a long pause from those words as ChiChi was standing inside, covering Goten's ears.

Krillin and Trunks: O_O

Frieza: wow.... I'm a Space Empress who blew up and ruled over planets most of her life. But wow, that was heavy.

Vegeta soon looked up to You, with small tears rolling down her face as she showed an angered expression.

Vegeta: you'll never understand a damn thing about my pride! You haven't, for a moment in your life, lived the life had to know how I feel! My Pride and Dignity was lost. They were the only thing that remains of my race, the people who have been destroyed! And Kakarot didn't just take it that away from me! You did as well the moment we first fought! And I will not stop until I get it back!

She said before walking right back inside, hold her stomach. You growled and was about to say something to her again until Trunks stepped in front of You.

Trunks: dad. Just let her go. She'll need time to calm down over that.

You let out a sigh.

(Y/N): fine.

Master Roshi: If you're finished with this shitty family drama, we've got bigger fish to fry. Cella's out there, and we have no idea what insidious plot she's brewing.

(Meanwhile).

Cella was floating above a circular ring.

Perfect Cella: how did all these squares make a circle?! I just--! ...No, no. It's fine. It's fine. It doesn't bother me, it doesn't bother me... It bothers me, it bothers me a lot!

One tile in the ring still colored green.

Perfect Cella: AND THAT ONE'S STILL GREEN!!!

(Back with Dr. Briefs).

He was scanning 16's skeletal structure inside his lab.

Dr. Briefs: thanks to the schematics Bulma brought me, I should be able to repair you! However, after rooting around in your system for a bit, I've discovered that you're missing an extensive portion of data. Unfortunately, Gero's server was destroyed with his lab, so...

Android 16: that is fine. I am my own Android. I will live my life accordingly. Faults and all.

Dr. Briefs: I could always give you a sick gatling gun.

Android 16: appreciated, but unnecessary.

He noticed Dr. Briefs' cat on his shoulder.

Android 16: what is that creature on your shoulder?

Dr. Briefs: this? Oh, this is my pussycat!

Android 16: May I touch your pussy?

Dr. Briefs' cat meowed.

Dr. Briefs: as long as you don't crush it.

16 took his cat from his shoulder.

Android 16: hello, pussycat.

Dr. Briefs' cat licked his face.

Android 16: It is licking me now. Should I lick the pussy?

Chichi's voice could be heard from outside.

ChiChi: absolutely not!

(Outside Capsule Corp).

Trunks: but ChiChi, if and when we have to fight Cella again, we're going to need Gohan!

ChiChi: what you need is to get it through your heads! I told Goka she could train with Gohan. I never said anything about letting him fight!

Krillin: you cannot keep him out of this.... he's a fighter!

CHI-CHI: He's ten!

Logan: AND he's the third strongest fighter I know!

Vegeta glared at Logan.

Vegeta: who's the fourth?

Logan: who do you think?

Vegeta: grrrrrrr!

ChiChi: I'm a fighter too, you know! How do you think I landed the strongest man on the planet?

Vegeta: arguably.

ChiChi: do not make me come over there! I will rip your world a-f**king-sunder!

Vegeta nervously looked away and groaned.

ChiChi: look, I might be books in and books out, but that's because I want something better for Gohan, instead of surviving off prize money and welfare. Now, I know that I can't stop him. But if he fights and gets hurt, or God forbid dies, and any of you could have stopped it...there's no dragon in this universe that will save you from me.

Vegeta: don't make me come over there...

She said while muttering under her breath.

(Meanwhile).

Cella was floating above her now complete ring.

Perfect Cella: finally! It is complete! Perfectly square, a fine marble white, and a full twenty-four by twenty....

She noticed a half-tile on the ring and stared at it.

Perfect Cella: ...let it go, Cella. You have shit to do.

Cella flew off.

(Inside Capsule Corp).

You and the others were watching TV as a Hetap commercial was playing.

Actor 1: hey, man. Is that the last Hetap?

Actor 2: yeah, and it's all mine!

Actor 1 fired off a gunshot.

Actor 2: ahh! Ahh! Oh, God! Oh, Jesus! Why?!

Actor 1 fired off another one.

Narrator: Hetap. Come on, you've killed for less.

Vegeta's mind: that's not untrue...

Krillin: hey, so not that I mind a good ol' veg sesh, but do we need everyone for this?

Trunks: you guys can go ahead and take off. I'll stick around and watch for Cella. It's been kind of neat to watch old TV shows. I checked out the country music channel earlier. Did you know that country is actually awful?

Yamcha: well then, if it's all the same to you, I'm gonna hit the gym. Make sure I'm ready for if Cella comes back.

Krillin: oh, can I join you? We'll make a day out of it, get some FroYo after. It is my cheat day.

Vegeta: oh, that sounds like fun. Mind if I join? Maybe we can see a movie, too.

She said in a clearly sarcastic tone.

Krillin: sure! That sounds awesome! I've been waiting for......... you're being sarcastic, aren't you?

Vegeta: careful! It's learning.

Yamcha: you know, if you're going to skulk around, you could at least try to not be a total dick about it!

Vegeta: oh, you're right. Allow me to try again.

She cleared throat.

Vegeta: hello, earthling. How's that gaping chest wound?

Yamcha: just fine! How's your spine?

Vegeta: ...I'm giving you a five minute head start.

Yamcha: thank you. I'm going to need it. You're very fast.

Frieza: now Vegeta, no need to be so grouchy just because you can't make a comeback against a human.

Bulma quickly ran inside the room.

Bulma: where is he? I heard he's here! Where's Trunks?!

Mrs. Briefs: You're holding him, darling!

Bulma: no, big Trunks!

Mrs. Briefs: well, Vegeta's right over there, across from Trunks!

Bulma: oh, thank God!

She went up in front of Trunks, causing him to stumble back.

Bulma: you okay, Trunks? I heard about everything! Do you need a snack? Maybe a juice box?

Trunks: Bulma, I'm eighteen.

Bulma: oh, right. um, stiff drink?

Trunks: Bulma, still eighteen.

Logan: Bulma, your tits, calm them.

Bulma: let me have this!

Master Roshi was watching an aerobics show on TV.

Aerobatics Instructor: work your body! Work your body! Make sure you don't hurt nobody!

Oolong approached Master Roshi and sat next to him.

Oolong: you know there's actual porn on the Internet, right?

Master Roshi: pig, you've gotta be able to appreciate the classics! It's what separates the perverts from the connoisseurs.

Frostwing: where does that put you exactly?

Frostwing asked as he was leaned on the side of the wall.

Aerobatics Instructor: One! Two! One....

Light started erupting from the ground.

Aerobatics Instructor: huh?

The floor exploded and Cella rose up from below the instructor.

Aerobatics Instructor: ahh!

Master Roshi and Oolong both screamed and huddled back from the TV, which also caught You, Logan, Vegeta, Frieza, Trunks, Bulma, and Chi-Chi's attention.

The Aerobatics Instructor fell down to the ground as Cella ascended to the next floor.

Aerobatics Instructor: ahh! You have great glutes!

Everyone gathered in front of the TV.

Krillin: Roshi! Change the channel!

Master Roshi changed the channel and showed Cella rising in a cooking show in one channel, a soap opera in another channel, and then showed an anime movie.

Chiaotzu: oh, wait! I love this movie! Leave it here!

Krillin: Chiaotzu.

Chiaotzu: Fine, whatever.

Master Roshi changed the channel to a news reporter on WHN news.

News Reporter: and as you can see, every dog has its....

Cella erupted underground right beside him.

News Reporter: aaahhhh!

Cella grabbed him by the neck and lifted him into the air.

Perfect Cella: the following contains violence, coarse language and adult situations not suitable for minors. Viewer discretion is advised.

She snapped the news reporter's neck while everyone at Capsule Corp minus Chiaotzu and Frieza watched in horror.

Frieza: ooooooo!

Chiaotzu: whoa! Brutal!

Perfect Cella: ladies, gentlemen, boys and girls, and that technicolor rainbow in between, I am Cella. You may remember me from the following cities.

She showed a quick scroll down of all the cities she had visited.

Perfect Cella: of course if you lived in those cities, you won't remember because you are now part of my biomass as I absorbed you. But that's not what I'm here to talk to about today. Today, I'm making an announcement!

Krillin: Please be leaving the planet forever. Please be leaving the planet forever. Please be leaving the planet forever!

Perfect Cella: I am leaving the planet forever.

Krillin: WOOHOO!

Perfect Cella: after I blow it up!

Krillin: OH, NO!

Frieza: hm, I like how this chick thinks.

Perfect Cella: unless!

Krillin wheezed.

Perfect Cella: one of your planet's"champions" can best me in one-on-one combat!

Bulma: so Goka and (Y/N), then.

Vegeta: Shut up!

Perfect Cella: I am officially hosting a once-in-your-lifetime event! A tournament so grand, it will leave you breathless! I hereby dub it...the Cella Games! Be part of the conversation on Twitter at #CellaGames!

Yamcha: annnnnd she's already trending.

He said as he was looking at his phone.

Perfect Cella: for all of you familiar with your adorable little World Martial Arts Tournament, I'll be borrowing the rules. No brackets this time, however. Yours truly will be your only opponent. And much like Vegeta's mother, I will accept all comers.

She said with a wink.

Vegeta: How dare...?

Krillin: ...why'd you take off your shirt?

Piccolo, Tien, Groudon, Kyogre and Mr. Popo were watching the news on a TV.

Perfect Cella: the location of this marvelous event is 28 KS Point 5. If you don't know where that is, blame the cartographers. The games will start at noon one week from today. That should give you plenty of time to prepare. Or for those not participating, time to connect with loved ones, get your affairs in order, or maybe just kill your boss! Get a purge going! Live a little! Because in one week's time...

She chuckled and raised one hand at the back of the studio.

Perfect Cella: well, to give you an idea...

She fired a blast through the back to the studio that destroyed many buildings and a mountain. The sound of people screaming next to Pokémon yelling out was heard.

Perfect Cella: so, keep that in mind, and I'll see you next Sunday! Also, feel free to pray to your God and Legendaries. But spoilers...... I won't be listening.

She soon flew out of the hole in the studio as the gang over at Kame House look in shock and fear at the static in the TV as You were annoyed by the god comment Cella gave, pretending to be a false god.

(Y/N): ...we are going to Kick. Her. Ass.

The channel was then abruptly changed to a porn channel.

Frieza: GAH!

Krillin: Roshi, what the hel......

Master Roshi: She said one week! I'm usin' it!!

(Meanwhile, somewhere else).

Someone was Calling" as a ringtone started playing before someone picked up the phone.

???: hello?

Someone spoke over the phone.

???: oh yeah, I saw it. I've already got my promo team on it. We'll have you on a plane tomorrow. You just do some pushups, sit ups, and pull plenty of buses...

The person on the phone was revealed to be Nappa.

Nappa: ...champ.

A/N: and on the note about Cella, Never act like you're a god in front of an actual one. Especially a Legendary Pokémon.