Chapter 22

Sweets and Reminders

A brief pause lingered on the line. Nika bit her lip after hearing what he said.

I'm so glad you called.

She blinked a couple of times, trying to keep her composure but the tear hanging at the edge of her eyes simply rolled down to her temple.

Nika breathed out.

"Miko . . ."

"Hmm?"

"Alam mo ba hindi niya alam kung ilang taon ako," she said in a wavering voice, sounding like a kid telling someone off.

"Hindi ko alam kung dahil ba 'di naman kami araw-araw nagkikita at 'di rin ako madalas makipag-usap kaya nakalimutan niya. Pero bakit dati no'ng bata ako madalas ako mangulit kay Tita para umuwi siya kasi birthday ko pero hindi niya magawa? Si Chrisha debut niya raw next year tapos ang request niya raw is magbakasyon dito."

"Chrisha is the name of your sister?" he asked.

"Oo. Tapos bakit gano'n? Ba't ang bilis pumayag 'pag sa kanya. Bakit sa akin hindi? Simula no'ng bata ako hanggang high school nangulit ako. Pero wala namang nangyari."

"I know." Miko sighed. "It's unfair."

"Ayaw ko mag-compare. Kasi gets ko naman baka gipit din nanay ko no'n. Ilang beses din naman pina-intindi sa 'kin ni Tita na mahirap trabaho niya doon tapos mahal din cost of living kaya hindi madaling mag-ipon tapos pinag-aaral pa ako dito. Gets ko naman 'yong part na 'yon pero naiinis din ako na ganito naiisip ko saka 'yong pakiramdam na parang naiinggit ako sa kapatid ko." Nika paused to breathe.

She was rambling out and she couldn't believe the last words that rolled off her tongue. It sent a cold shiver on her spine and she could hardly understand why she said that.

"Teka."

"It's okay, go on," Miko said softly from the other line.

"Hindi, kasi . . ." Napasinghal siya sa inis. "'Di ko naman ibig sabihin talaga na naiinggit ako. Matagal ko na ring tanggap na unfair talaga kaya alam ko sa sarili ko na dapat wala na akong paki kaya naiinis ako kung bakit ganito ako ngayon."

She was annoyed and frustrated with the thought of herself regressing to her younger years. She trained and convinced herself for a long time that there's nothing she could do about her situation with her mom. So in the end, she sucked it up. It is what it is.

Pagod na rin siyang magreklamo at mangulit sa tita niya kasi wala namang nangyayari. She tried to be at peace with it, and it took her a long time to establish that.

So she doesn't understand why she's suddenly on a relapse.

"Are you still there?" tanong ni Miko.

"Oo. Nandito pa."

"Okay . . . can I tell you something?"

"Ano 'yon?"

"You're worth going home to," he said.

She scoffed in disbelief. "Sinasabi mo lang 'yan, e."

"No. Totoo 'yon."

"Talaga lang ha," sabi ni Nika.

"Do you remember that time when we stayed in my condo for a whole week? After our date sa San Miguel?"

"Oo."

"I always rushed going home because I know you're at home for that week."

"Ha?"

"I said before na I like going home to you. Bakit kinalimutan mo?"

"Ah . . . ito na, tatandaan ko na. Sorry, 'wag ka magtampo."

She heard a soft chuckle on the other line. "It's fine. I'm not upset, but I want you to remember that. You're worth going home to, and I like coming home to you. And I'm not just saying this to make you feel better. I'm saying this because I mean it."

Nika smiled. Genuinely. For the first time the whole day and her eyes blurred out for an entirely different reason.

"Do you remember that that week fell on our finals? Before kapag finals namin sa law school, I may not look like it but I also felt drained and frustrated. Especially sa subjects na hindi ko gusto. But that week na magkasama tayo sa condo, everything felt a little bit easier."

"Itigil mo na nga pang-uuto mo sa akin, Mikenzo. Masyadong gumagana."

Natawa si Miko. "Hindi ako nang-uuto. You know that."

"Oo na, oo na. Dami mong sinasabi, tama na."

"Hindi ka lang sanay," sabi ni Miko.

"Tapos, ikaw? Madalas ka ba magsabi ng ganito sa iba?"

"No, and you know that too."

"Tama ka na nga!" suway niya.

She sniffed, wiping of the tears that rolled down to her temple. Silence hanged on the line and she could sense that he was waiting for her to ease up.

Nika felt like she was in a whirlpool and everything was simply overwhelming. It takes a lot for her to cry and she couldn't handle the tears rolling down from her eyes without notice. But perhaps, it's quite all right.

Wala namang nakakakita, she thought to herself. Si Miko lang din may alam.

"Nika?" he called.

"Bakit?"

"Don't forget that, okay?"

She nodded. "Okay."

"Good girl."

Natawa siya. "Nahawa ka na rin ba sa akin niyan?"

"I guess you could say that. Pero what do you want?"

"Ha?" she asked, confused.

"For dessert. What do you want?"

"Bakit?"

"Nakalimutan mo ulit?" tanong ni Miko.

"Ang alin?"

"Our deal before. We both agreed to it na if one of us rants or share something heavy, we get to eat something sweet after?"

"Ah . . ." Nika smiled. "Naaalala mo pa rin pala 'yon."

"Of course."

"Kaso hindi ko alam ano'ng bet ko."

"Hmm . . . do you want chocolate truffles? Kauuwi lang kasi ng parents ko last Tuesday from their Europe trip. They brought home a lot of sweets tapos bigyan daw kita."

Her eyes widened in surprise. "Hala? Totoo?" May pasalubong ako galing sa parents niya?

"Yup."

"Grabe! Pasabi kamo thank you."

"Sure. Ipadala ko na sa 'yo 'tong truffles?"

"Sige lang. Ikaw bahala."

"Okay. I'll add cake. Bumili kasi Andy and Mama ng cake kanina. She also asked me a lot about you. I was meaning to tell you that but I'm swamped."

The smile on her lips wouldn't fade away while listening to him ramble some words.

"Miko," she called for his name, cutting him off with whatever he was saying.

"Hmm?"

"Thank you pala sa pagsagot mo sa tawag ko kanina," sabi niya. She knew he could easily ignore her call. Lalo pa dahil nasabihan naman siya ni Miko na marami siyang aaralin kaya mas maiintindihan niya kung hindi masasagot 'yong tawag niya.

But despite that, he still picked up.

"It's nothing and you're always welcome."

***

Nika had no energy to go to the office the following day. Nagsabi na lang siya sa boss nila na hindi siya makakapasok. She just used dysmenorrhea as an excuse even though she's not on her period yet.

Pero wala talaga siyang gana para pumasok at buti tinanggap din ang reason niya para sa sick leave.

An hour may have already passed by with her just spacing out and rolling on her bed. Hindi rin siya babangon kung hindi pa kakalam ang sikmura niya.

Nika was on her way to the convenience store when she received a call from Klein.

"Ano kailangan mo?" sagot niya sa tawag.

"Absent ka raw sabi ni Zoe. Nasa dorm ka ba?"

"Oo. Bakit?"

"Wala ka gagawin?" tanong ni Klein.

Nika was scanning one of the fridge for a drink when she answered, "Wala."

"Tara. Samahan mo 'ko."

"Saan?"

"Kailangan ko ng moral support."

"Gago anong moral support? Ang laki-laki mo na," natatawang sagot niya.

"Makamura ka naman sa 'kin ang aga-aga?"

Her brow snapped. "'Di ka pa sanay?"

"Samahan mo na kasi ako," pangungulit ni Klein.

"Saan nga?"

"Do'n sa shop ng kaibigan ko. Ngayon kasi appointment ko, e."

"Appointment para saan?"

"Tattoo."

"Ah, okay. Anong oras?"

"After lunch."

"Sige," she answered, closing the door of the fridge and walking to an aisle in search for a pack of oatmeal. "Basta susunduin mo 'ko, ha? Tinatamad akong mag-commute."

"Oo, s'yempre."

"Okay—"

"Tapos damayan mo na ako. Pa-tattoo ka na rin," sabi ni Klein.

A crease immediately formed on her forehead. "Gago bahala ka. Mag-isa ka d'yan."