I'm not used to this yellow stuff all over the ground. My paws sink in it and leave marks. I wet on it and it disappears. My owners grab some and throw it at each other while they laugh. It's so cold! How can anyone want this hitting their skin? But my owners are happy and that makes my tail wag. I shiver in the clothes my owner put on me. 

The humans are covered in the stuff. Their fur collects it like I collect fleas. I sniff myself. I'm covered in it too! It's so new to me. I've never seen weather this cold before. I wish I was inside. 

"Ready to go in, Charlie?"

I'm Charlie! I wag my tail so he can see me! My owners take me back inside where it's warm and cozy! I leap onto the couch and rid myself of the cold wet stuff. I roll around and shake and sneeze and burp. My owners sit next to me and we all cuddle together. This is the best pack ever.

**********

So many people are here! The man's friends are all here! A few women are here too but I don't recognize their scents. I zip through their legs and pant. They're all drinking and I want to drink too. I spill water all over the floor and head back out to join the fun. 

"Come on, Mal, give the dog a beer."

"You're a bad influence, Bon, ya' know that?"

"Jus' want all my friends havin' fun. Includin' this little guy."

I stand on my hind legs and let the man with the wild fur scratch my chin. I like him. He's very gentle and warm. He smells like old bread. His smile is very kind. I show him my tongue. I think it's gotten longer. 

"Here's to the album, eh, Bon?"

"Right you are, Mal." I hear clinking and talking and swallowing and laughing. Everyone here is so happy! And that makes me happy! I want to celebrate with these people! There's so much fun and action around here, this is great! 

"Three...two....one...happy New Year!"

Everyone cheers and claps and I wag my tail. A loud crack in the sky booms throughout the house and I run. I remember that crack. The same thing happened back home, too. Loud flashes in the sky and booms and whistles and it scares me. I tuck my tail between my legs and run. I must hide! We're all in danger! 

I crawl under our bed and my ears twitch back and forth. No one comes looking. The booms and roars are still loud but at least I can't see the flashes. I'm safe under here. I lick my paws and chew some shoes. How can everyone be so calm when we're under attack? They should be hiding under here with me! I think about grabbing my humans and pulling them under. But I love all of them, they're my best friends! I'll have to rescue all of them! Time for Charlie to be a good dog and save his humans!

I inch my way out from under the bed and sniff. There's no one here and I limp out of the room. I wander around sniffing for my owners who seem to have disappeared. But I catch a whiff of their scent! They smell so similar now. I trot through the crowd where I see my humans by themselves. 

"I think I'm pregnant, Malcolm."

I must save them! I must get them to safety first! They're my priority! I think about how to go about dragging them to the bed. They're a lot bigger than me and heavier. There has to be an easy way to do this.

"Are...are ya' sure?"

"I think so."

The man grabs the woman and lifts her into the air! I startle! They're laughing and their faces are soaking wet! They're scared of the booming too and they're trying to hide it! More cracks and booms and flashes scare me from all sides! The man kisses the woman a hundred times and I scurry under their feet to hide! What are you doing standing around? I have to get you to a shelter! 

"You're the fuckin' best, ya' know that, love?" I can't help but wag my tail. They're happy. And I'm happy. I'm also scared and should probably go back into hiding. But I don't move. My humans are so happy and despite the scary booming and cracking in the sky, I feel safe. 

I feel joy.