AN; Nakakatuwa naman ng mga comments niyo kaya maraming salamat hahaha!

Journey To The Forbidden Library

It has been already weeks since I last met that Exodus guy, o hindi ko alam kung totoo nga siyang myembro ng Exodus pero hindi ko ramdam ang pagsisinungaling niya. Wala akong sinabihan tungkol sa pagkikita naming iyon dahil ayaw kong mangamba na naman sila.

Dahil kakatapos lang namin sa Black Clan, and I don't know what will happen if I told them about the movements of Exodus. I know I will only endanger the island more I keep it to myself, pero huwag muna ngayon. Until I find the link between that traitor from the Council and the Black Clan, I will not bring up Exodus.

Right now papasok na kami ouusa Magnus Town. The big sign in the middle of the two towers at the opposite sides above us, was the sign they were home. As usual, the people in this town is so lively like everyday is a festival. Some welcomed our appearances knowing we came from a battle, and some just didn't care and returned to their daily lives. Malawak ang capital, enough to be a city and it's more prosperous than other cities, pero Town parin talaga ang pangalan ng lugar na ito, so they decided it to be a town.

Isang buwan din kami nawala sa lugar na ito, and we notice the change in temperature. It has already become colder, napansin din namin ito simula nang lumakbay kami pabalik, and thankfully we never met any troubles along the way since those bandits. And yes, those Knights caught up with us after defeating those bandits, ibig sabihin ay magkaiba ang grupo ng mga bandits na yun at ang mga sumusunod sa aming grupo ng Exodus.

Back to the weather though, patapos na ang buwan which marks the end of the autumn season, ibig sabihin magiging winter na, reason of the cold weather. I can see children running around already wearing their coats. And from here, makikita ko na ang Academy. The Academy is so massive and big that anyone can see it from other towns.

Pumasok kami sa may forested area, which served as a barrier around the whole school. Matapos dumaan dito ng ilang minuto ay nakikita narin namin ang malaking gates, besides are giants wall which prevents us to see behind. May limang Knights na nakabantay sa labas ng gates, and after Captain talked to them, bumukas narin sa wakas ang malaking gate.

Nasurpresa nalang akong makita ang karamihan sa mga studyante na naptigil sa mga ginagawa nila. They all stared at our direction happily, it seems they already knew we were successfull on pushing the enemy away. Their chants and cheers rang through the back of my mind, and it was annoying. I groaned as I felt their energy radiating in my body, suddenly I became more tired.

The carriages stopped on the grounds just in front of the gianst marbled staircase. The stairs were a hundred, making me roll my eyes. Teachers came to assist most injured students at mabilis silang tineleport papunta sa hospital sa bayan, because we just couldn't stop there earlier sa dami namin.

Despite the fact that my legs were aching, I continued to step right up the huge staircase. Hanggang sa narating ko narin ang sa itaas matapos ang ilang minuto. It was said na ganito talaga ang hagdan para mas ma-train ang mga studyante sa endurance nila.

Pagdating ko sa itaas ay may malaking bukas na double-doors dito, directing me to the lobby. Sa itaas ng lobby ay ang chandeliers, glistening in light, reflecting those around it, kaya nagmumukhang mga gintong kumikinang ang mga bagay dito.

I don't know why I'm actually describing things unusually today, I just feel somehow different. Others were really happy when they returned here, saying they're home as their friends greeted them. And for the first time, or was it? Anyway, I felt a pang of jealousy, I was envious they had a home to return to, friends to consider as family. I sighed as I smiled bitterly. It makes me remember my friend and family back home. Home huh? Is it still considered my home when I left it voluntarily?

I wiped the thoughts off my mind at dumerecho nalang sa opisina ni Headmistress. Too much energy is disturbing my stable emotions again. Hindi na ako kumatok sa pintuan ng opisina niya at biglaang pumasok dahil wala naman akong nararamdamang may isa pang tao doon. Nakita kong nakaupo si Headmistress sa swivel chair niya as she stared through the transparent windows in front of her.

"You seem to be in a hurry, Ke'ala." Wika niya habang napaupo ako sa may couch.

Well not that I'm in a hurry, I just want to deal with her quickly. Agad kong kinuha ang folder na nakalagay sa may bulsa ng cloak ko at nilagay ito sa lamesa. Tapos ay humarap siya sa direksyon ko at kinuha ang folder tsaka binuksan ito.

"This should stop any movements from the blacks at the meantime." Pero ang Exodus na naman ang problema.

"Well we inflicted too much damage on them this time around."

"Headmistress, what about my spirits?" Derecha kong tanong.

Then she snapped her fingers, moments later ay may lumitaw nalang na isang babae na nakasuot ng purple na cloak. Naka braid ang buhok niya gilid ng balikat niya and she has wonderful round brown eyes. Though the moment she appeared, she was facing the Headmistress.

"I was just about to tell you. Fiona, what did you find there?"

"The Spirit Land is a vast place, Headmistress." She politely said while slightly bowing her head. "In a certain place, I met a guy named Julius Chrone, he is one of the five Spirit Keepers, and he would not allow me to access to the Spirit Library, due to certain rules in the Land."

"In case you aren't aware, ang Spirit Land ay ang lugar kung saan nananatili ang mga spirits. It's their natural home. Spirit Keepers are those who keep spirits from leaving the Land without a contract from a human, because unless that happens, they should never leave the place. Ke'ala, ano ang pagkaintindi mo sa mga spirits?"

"All I know is that they are dead people who cannot die yet and choose to linger in places."

"In other words like ghosts." She said and I nodded. "Hindi ka mali sa sinabi mo, but it's not the matter of them dying or not. Most spirits are born from a dead soul's last ounce of energy before their energies scatter completely back to the nature. While there are those spirits na naging spirits dahil namatay na sila, but that's a rare occurrence." Just like Ziandra and Theone.

"Humans are forbidden to get contracted to spirits, dahil tulad ng pagkakaalam mo ay kinakailangan nila ng enerhiya ng taong pinili nilang tulungan. You understand this part already, rigt?" I nodded. "That's why I will tell you to forget them." Nagulat ako sa sinabi niya.

"Forget them?! Are you out of your mind?! Mga spirits ko sila, hindi ko sila pwedeng pabayaan." Pati ang spirit na si Fiona ay nagulat sa pagsigaw ko, it must be really rude of me to shout in front of the Headmistress.

"It's the first time I saw you act like this Ke'ala, you're getting angry." As a matter of fact, I am. "But the thing is, you can." I gritted my teeth in anger. "You can disregard them since they'd be no used to you in the future dahil nawawala sila."

"At sinabi mong tutulongan mo ako!"

"I said, 'I'll let my spirits handle them', which I did." Damn, I messed up. I shouldn't have let this woman handle this at all! "You still feel a link between you and your spirits right? Then cut that link off."

"Bakit ko naman gagawin yun? They might be somewhere out there and needed my help." She sighed, as if she's dealing with a kid, that's the emotions she's telling me right now.

"You don't understand Ke'ala. That link is day by day extracting your energy while you gain nothing in return dahil wala nga sila dito."

"I understand your concern Headmistress, I really do. But those are my own spirits, I can't leave them alone."

"Your spirits are stuck somewhere in the Spirit Land. My spirits cannot find them dahil sa laki ng lugar, and the only way to find them is to get permission from the Spirit Keeper to access the Spirit Library, as it is the only way to find them wherever they are. Pero gaano katagal sa tingin mo sila mahahanap? Iba ang daloy ng oras doon at sa daloy ng oras dito, since it's literally an another world. At habang naghahanap ka sa kanila ng matagalan ay nauubos ang enerhiya mo which makes it totally useless for you to do that for them."

"Taking such a risk for them may lead to your own death. And even if you want to save them, only your own spirit can take you there, and there are small chances of getting out of that place." Mahabang litanya ni Headmistress, she's telling me to give up in a more detailed way.

"I understand now how you can't help me further Headmistress," dahil imposible namang siya mismo ang pupunta doon. And it's too impossible to find a spirit user just to take me there. "But I will not cut our connections. It's still here, nararamdaman ko pa sila." Although it's very small.

"I can't let you slowly get weak and die just like that Ke'ala, I will not allow you to cross worlds. Just the thought itself is impossible. Cut your ties with them." Seryoso ang pagkasabi niya nun.

Suddenly, I felt the pressure of her words ringing from the back of my mind. Like her words contain weight, it's heavy, and my mind is throbbing. Ang sakit nito. It kept on saying 'cut ties with them' ng paulit-ulit. Is this her authoritative ability? The ability to implement orders and make anyone follow.

"Do you understand, Ke'ala?"

Cut ties with them.

Cut ties with them.

Cut ties with them.

"Again Ke'ala," she's making me stop fighting her command. "Do you understand?"

I prevented the urge to say 'I understand' dahil gagawin ko nga ang gusto niya kung mangyari nga yun. What is this feeling? Ayaw ko nito. I don't like people telling me what to do at all! Ang sakit ng ulo ko, but still I remained looking at her, without looking away. I can't let myself show her that I'm affected. Hindi ako papayag. I-I can't leave them...

"We'll protect you...even if it costs our lives."

"Ang sinasabi ko lang Keila ay, ano man ang gagawin mo simula ngayon o saan ka man pupunta, we're always on your side."

Am I just suppose to leave them behind matapos nila akong protektahan? Well of course they would protect me, they are my own spirits after all. B-but at the same time, I actually considered them as someone important. Hindi ko kakayanin na mawala nalang sila matapos ang lahat ng pinagdaanan namin, how can I?

Like I said, I never intended to have friends, but when I do, I don't plan on losing them.

"I understand, Headmistress." Sabi ko sa kaniya matapos ang mahabang katahimikan. "I understand completely that you can't help me. But thank you for your information, I'll do whatever I can from here." Tapos ay tumayo ako at tumungo sa pintuan tsaka ito binuksan.

"Ke'ala," huli niyang tawag sa akin bago ako umalis. "Will it beneft you doing this further?" I turned my head around due to her question, hindi ito nakikita sa mukha niya pero alam kong nagugulat siya. I broke through her command which is unusual. Will this benefit me huh?

"It will." I assured her tapos ay lumabas na ng opisina niya, closing the door behind me.

I was walking through the halls back to my dorm room when I started thinking about what to do. I said I'll do whatever I can from here, pero ano ba talaga ang dapat kung gawin? I admit that I don't know what to do without that woman helping me, she's the only support I have in this whole island. Pero naiintindihan ko na delikado nga itong gagawin ko, and I understand she's just worried. But rather than showing me that concern, why doesn't she actually try doing that to her own daughter?

Tsk. I'm annoyed. Pero base sa impormasyon na sinabi niya ay kailangan kong makapunta sa Spirit Land, and gain access to the Spirit Library, but first thing's first. Kailangan kong makahanap ng spirit to take me there, but me supporting a total of three spirits, will I be okay? At hindi naman ganoon kasimple humanap ng spirit and get contracted to one, I know how rare spirits are.

I can only find one spirit probabaly if I return to the Lethum Mountain, a place where spirits are stuck. Pero naalala ko ang dark figure na nandun, I still get the shivers whenever I remember that shadow touching my arm and actually burned it. Pero hindi ko naman pwedeng isama ang iba sa gagawin ko just because I need a companion, it'll look like I'm depending on someone again.

Pero wala na ba talagang ibang paraan? If there's only one other place that I can find a spirit... I sighed. Tinaas ko ang kamay ko, as I generated tiny sparks of electricity on my fingers, blue lights were sparkling. Then I clenched my fist. Nandito parin ang electricity, that means I'm still connected to Ziandra, but what about Theone?

Binuksan ko ang pintuan sa dorm room ko at pumasok. There I saw Iyana covering herself up with her thick black blanket, habang hinihila ito ni Andrea. I chuckled at the sight of it. I know this is not the time to be chuckling right now, but it eases me seeing the two of them.

"Andrea! Tigilan mo nga ako!" Naiinis na sigaw ni Iyana sa isa, pero hindi tinigilan ni Andrea ang paghila.

"Your father just sent you another letter just now, didn't he? Don't ignore him and don't run away from reality!" She scolded her. She always has that nature.

"Oh shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Buhay ko 'to and I thought I told you never to meddle?!"

"I'm not meddling! I just don't want to see you run away! Oras na para magpakababae ka Iyana, alam mong dapat mo nang tigilan ang ganitong attutude mo!"

"You don't know the feeling of being engaged to someone you don't even know! And your own father just deciding that like he wanted to disregard you!" Natahimik si Andrea.

Now that I think of it, Iyana has been alone before she met us. She's never left the Academy just to return to her house. Because she never felt at home back there, dahil hindi niya magawa ang mga gusto niya. Bawat galaw niya ay binabantayan dahil anak siya ng isa sa pinakasikat ay mayamang Klein, she can't act like this in front of other people outiside the Academy.

I don't exactly know what happened, but her mother was long gone, her father probabaly rarely meet her in person, and both of her brothers are working as aid to his father now that they simply just don't have any time to deal with her. That's why she has this kind of personality, dahil narin sa ability niya, but mostly because she feels lonely that she has to build a certain wall around her.

So she's not used at other people meddling with her life and actually getting inside that surrounding wall she fortified jusy by herself ever since she was probabaly a young child. Everyone has problems, including Iyana kahit hindi niya man ito pinapakita. Unlike Andrea, Iyana isn't expressive and acts like she doesn't care kaya minsan ay walang nakakaalam kung ano ang iniisip niya.

So it's only natural for her to think that her own father disregards her, even her brothers, because they never really know the real her, and for us, Iyana has two personalities, one that noble-like daughter filled with passion, responsibilities, and respect. Habang ang totoong siya ay malayo sa ganoon, she doesn't usually get excited over things, she's not usually serious at wala lang talaga siyang pakealam sa paligid niya, like she has her own world. Honestly, what kind of world does she actually has?

And Andrea here understands her feeling, but she doesn't share the same sentiment because her own family doesn't even show their care for her so getting an engagement has never crossed her thoughts.

"I understand your loneliness, Iyana." She mumbled among this sudden silence. "Pero tama ka, hindi ko alam ang pakiramdam na ipakasal sa taong hindi ko kilala, and I'm not telling you to just agree and get the engagement done."

"Then what are you trying to say?"

"I'm telling you to stop running and face it. Kung ayaw mo ipaintindi mo sa kanila na ayaw mo, kung may mali sabihin mong may mali, at kung may problema ka ipakita mo sa kanila kung ano ang problema. You still have your family, make them listen to you." Because her own family never did that thing for her.

After few moments, Iyana sat up from her bed and stared at Andrea. She smiled, na pati ako ay nasurpresa. It wasn't a fake smile that she usually shows, a smile without any malice or any intentions, a normal smile coming from a girl who actually just wants to be normal.

"Fine. I'll do it, Andrea. I guess I owe you." She said looking away, hiding her embarrassment. Muli na naman akong natawa. But this time, I caught their attention.

"Eavesdropping again?" Naiinis na wika ni Iyana tsaka tumayo mula sa kama niya.

"It's just that Andrea's gotten good with her words." Biglang napatingin sa akin si Andrea, her face filled with the same embarrassment. I laughed. But soon the two joined me.

Looking at the three of us laughing, it made me wish the peaceful days like this would just last forever. But even I am aware that's impossible and it's naive thinking things like that. But if I  were to have a choice, I'd like the three of us just stay the same, just like this.

But the world's too cruel for that.

Dumerecho ako sa may mini-kitchen part ng room at kumuha ng malamig na tubig mula aa rerfigerator. The water flowed down my lungs, cooling my body, as I took a cup to prepare a tea. May dalawang lalagyan na nakalagay sa may cabinet, one was named jasmine and the other was vanilla.

Choosing one between the two is a war.

"The letter indicated na kailangan ko daw bumalik as soon as possible dahil may party na magaganap sa estate this week. I will meet one of the guys there at diyan na magsisimula ang lahat." Iyana explained. "And since you two really love meddling, kailangan niyong sumama sa akin." Napatigil ako sa pag-iisip kung saan ang pipiliin ko dahil sa sinabi niya.

I stared back at Iyana who was crossing her arms. Pati si Andrea ay hindi din makapaniwala. A party? Wait, if I think about it, Klein is a noble family, does it mean isang formal party ang event na ito and she's literally asking a commoner like me to attend?

Well hindi naman ganoon kalala ang social discrimination sa bansang ito but there should be a noble out there who hates commoners. And what's worse, it is a formal event, and I don't think I'm suited for that one. Isa pa, I currently have my own share of problems. I need to find a way to get to the Spirit Land, so I don't have time so deal with parties.

"If you insist sasama talaga ako. It's a chance for me to build connections." Andrea said with delight. The de la Valliere family is actually considered as nobles in this country dahil isang Saint ang ina niya, and in the first place, their background is already powerful as well politically. Although walang royalty dito sa Magnus, there are still the ranks of nobility.

"Thanks for the invite, but I'll pass."

"But classes are dismissed simula nung umatake ang mga blacks sa borders ng mga territories. Especially that winter is coming, Headmistress has already announced winter breaks to be early, kaya walang pasok sa halos dalawang buwan." Iyana explained. She always get this kind of information early.

"That explains kung bakit maraming studyante ang naabutan ko kanina sa halls na may mga dalang bagahe." Sabi ni Andrea.

Great. Since the winter break is early, marami ang oras ko maghanap ng impormasyon ukol sa Spirit Land. After I'm done with my spirits, I'll get back on track which is to find traces of blacks, to find him.

"Let's just say may pupuntahan ako."

"Is it another mission?" Tanong ni Andrea.

"No, more like personal stuffs."

"Mahalaga ba ito?" Tanong naman ni Iyana.

"Yes."

"Students are required to go home on winter break, uuwi ka ba?" Uuwi ba ako huh? I wish I could, but I can't.

"Hindi."

"Ano ba ang gagawin mo?"

"May hahanapin."

"Saan ka ba pupunta?"

"The Spi—teka nga, bakit niyo ba ako tinatanong?" And damn I almost gave in! That was close. I can't let them know, because they'll meddle again. This is my own problem, hindi ko na sila kailangan dito. I appreciate all their help, but I have to do this alone. Or at least I want to.

"Sasama ako sayo." Iyana said. Are they exchanging questions just now just to say that?

"Anong pinagsasabi mo? May party ka pang dadaluhan." Andrea scolded her once again. "Kaya ako ang sasama sa kaniya." Jeez.

"I'm going alone." Because I decided to be independent this time. Sa huli ay dalawang tea nalang ang ginawa ko ay isa isa ko silang ininom. The aroma was too refreshing and soothed my aching muscles.

"Will you be alright?" Sabay nilang tanong. I smiled, though not that they can see it.

"I'll be fine, kaya problemahin niyo nalang ang engagement." Upon saying that, Iyana groaned.

Mabilis na akong naligo at nagbihis sa normal ko na t-shirt tapos ay jeans then a pair of boots, tapos ay sinuot ko pa ang kulay gray na sweater ko dahil malamig nga ngayon. I then wore that same black cloak again. Binuksan ko ang drawer sa tabi ng kama ko at nakita ang isang maliit na lalagyan na may lamang mga pills.

It confused me kung bakit nandito ito, but then I remember it was Doctor Mira's 'newly-created calming pills'. That woman from the school infirmary. Hindi ko naman ito nagamit kaya nilagay ko ito sa ilalim ng cloak ko. Ibabalik ko ito sa kaniya mamaya.

Paglabas ko ay hindi parin tapos ang dalawa sa bangayan nila. Habang nag-uusap ang dalawa sa mga gagawin nila ay lumabas ako ng kwarto without them noticing. Agad akong pumunta sa library para maghanap ng iba pang ideya kung paano makapasok sa Spirit Land.

The library was glistening in lights when I stepped inside. The floors were crystals, na parang salamin kung saan makikita ko ang sarili ko sa sahig. I sometimes stop by this place dahil walang tao, and the last time I went here was when everyone was out for the festival. May mga floors ang libray na ito. The first floor was for the first years, then so on. But there's that fifth floor, or they call it the Forbidden Floor.

Pero dahil walang tao ngayon dito sa library, walang makakaalam kung may pumasok sa fifth floor. Because finding information there is easier. So I quickly ran up the stairs, sa second floor, third, fourth, hanggang sa naabot ko na ang huling palapag. Sa ibabaw ng library ay makikita ko ang round crystallised transparent roof. Sa unahan ko ay may malaking pintuan, just like any other floors. But I know very well this one is different.

And I feel like something is about to happen again.

απαγορευμένο τμήμα των βιβλίων