"I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAAAAAR!"

I must have thrown about ten outfits on the carpeted floor by the time I had a mental breakdown. What was I supposed to wear - where was I even going with Luca? Was Fashion Nova not fancy enough, or were we going to something like Dave & Busters and it would be too fancy? Could Fashion Nova be too fancy?

I took my phone out and texted Luca, his contact name still lovingly "LBs bitch ass". With a smirk I quickly asked where we were going, then continued my search for something to wear.

The only remotely fancy thing I had in my closet was a 328 dollar Reformation dress I got from Nordstrom during tax season. Fashion Nova or Reformation...

We're going to La Bernardin.

"OH MY GOD, IT'S FANCY!" I wailed, throwing myself to the bed. "Wahhhhhhhh!"

-------------------------------------------------------

Sighing, I pulled the hem of my dress lower for what seemed like the umpteenth time. Who did I think I was? I was a broke social worker trying to blend in to a world that I very obviously didn't belong.

"Miss Wixtrom, you look beautiful tonight."

I looked up to find an always dapper Samuel, a smile on his creased face. I couldn't help but smile back. "Mr. Samuel, are you my date tonight?"

He dingled the keys in his hands. "Unfortunately, I am but the driver as usual. Besides, I don't think my wife would like it too much. Also, French food isn't my favorite."

"Mine either, but I've heard their steaks are amazing."

"Maybe one day I'll take my wife. I don't think she liked my last anniversary gift," his smile was still endless. "And she's the one who likes French food."

"I'm sorry to keep you waiting, Cai," Luca's voice called out as he descended the stairs.

Looking as fucking handsome as ever, he wore a white turtleneck that went perfectly with his houndstooth printed blazer. His black pants were just tight enough and just casual enough to fit in perfectly.

I hated it. I hated how my mouth went dry, how words seemed to escape me, how breathless I became. It was like the disappearance of Luca Blackburn never happened, and I was still completely head over heels with him.

Quickly trying to recover, I smiled. "I don't think my hip-dips belong in this dress."

His eyes narrowed. "To this day, I'm not sure I understand how you see yourself as anything less than perfect."

I shook my head, and held my hand out. "I see trying to impress me has already begun."

He took my hand within his, giving it a tight squeeze. "I always will."

"Chinese or the diner?" I asked Luca, not looking up from the mountain of menus we complied over the year of living here.

"It's up to you. Are you more in the mood for a milkshake or dumplings?"

Plopping myself on the couch next to Luca, I sighed. "Both, to be honest."

He laid his arm on the back of the couch, prompting me to lay my head back and use his arm as an impromptu pillow. "Wanna go somewhere? My treat."

I gestured to my outfit - capri yoga pants that spelled out 'PINK', and a black v-neck with bleach stains on it. "Totally. Let's go somewhere fancy."

He laughed. "I'll get dressed - a la bummy - too. We'll be the hottest couple there."

My heart stopped at the word 'couple'. Why? Whywhywhywhy?

A short time later, we pulled up to the overly fancy Manhattan restaurant. Boasting high reviews ever since they opened up, they even had an age limit for children - they were literally that fancy. Suddenly feeling self conscious, I took a deep breath as I took Luca's hand when he opened my door for me.

He squeezed my hand, walking us through the door. When we made it to the maître d, he flashed the smile that made anyway want to melt in his hands. "Blackburn."

The maître d, a women who looked like she had a raspy laugh but had an air of complete seriousness around her, smiled. "We've been waiting for you, Mr. Blackburn."

The way she said Mr. Blackburn gave me goosebumps. Did everyone know who he was? Was I truly that fucking idiotic?

The problem with fancy restaurants were how crowded they were. Businessmen, New York Times food critics, and couples who had saved juuuust enough money to split a prix fixe menu crowded beautifully adorned tables.

And then I saw it - the round table in the center that was decorated with beautifully with a faux white tree that gave the aesthetic of winter. Warm light came from tea candles, making our table completely intimate in a room crowded with strangers. "Did you set this up?"

Luca guided me to my seat, being chivalrous and pulling the seat out. "When making the reservation, I told them to give me something that would impress a woman who doesn't like me, but I want to like me."

I rolled my eyes as I sat down. "I like you enough, dummy."

"The keyword is 'enough'", Luca retorted with a smirk, taking his seat from across from me. "Anyway, I hope you like it here. It was either this or Rao's -"

"Rao's?" I coughed out. "The only way to get in their is if a mob boss died. Or if -"

"You're a mob boss?"

I rolled my eyes again. I'm sure this wouldn't be just the second time this night I would, either. "I wonder when I'll finally get used to the weird pull you have. It's truly as if you own a portion of the 5 boroughs."

He shrugged simply, he eyes scanning the menu. "Owning a portion of Staten Island wouldn't be something to brag about."

"The graffiti isn't terrible." I didn't bother to look at the menu. The only thing I'd want would be a bottle of moscato and filet mignon. Was that basic of me?

Our conversation flowed easily. Though I was highly aware of the stares from the surrounding tables, it somehow seemed like old times. Like we were still roommates.

"That one chicken thing that Giuseppe makes really is my favorite as of lately," I stated suddenly, taking a long sip of moscato.

Luca raised his eyebrow until he remembered our conversation from last night. "Does he make anything else you like?"

"He's a good chef. I wonder if, maybe one day, he would work as a chef somewhere."

Luca's lips were in a tight line. "I guess you got close with Shuch."

I nodded. "I realized not too long ago that I was projecting you onto him. Still..."

Though our food - which looked like it came straight from a photograph - was delivered to our table, the conversation continued. "But you still care for him."

I quickly nodded, debating on if I should take a picture of the food and restaurant for instagram and tag Luca in it. "I think it would be impossible not to."

"He left you for dead at the auction," Luca muttered, angrily cutting into his food.

"I was fine. That girl -"

"Yasmin."

"Yes, Yasmin," I answered, hoping the steak in front of me was so good it would take my annoyance away. "Yasmin wasn't going to kill me. This isn't dinner conversation."

He chewed for awhile, the expression on his face hinting that his mind was going a mile a minute. "You're right. I'm sorry. I often find myself saying the wrong things with you, when really all I want to do is say the things you want to hear the most."

If my hand wasn't holding my fork, it would've reached for his hand. "What have you been doing all these years?"

"Things I haven't wanted to. Keeping up with appearances, running businesses. The show Power really makes this look a lot easier than it is."

"I can't even watch Power without thinking of you," I said with a grin, poking at my steak. How do people learn to cook so well? All I knew how to do was bake a mean Red Velvet cake. "Hows your love life been?"

He coughed, his eyes going wide as he pounded on his chest to get the food out of the wrong pipe. I smirked - seeing Luca Blackburn not prepared for something really gives you a confident boost. "This has to be a set up."

I shook my head, refilling my glass of moscato. "Its bad enough you're already an Adonis. Now that you're a bona-fide 'bad boy', your bed was probably always warm."

"You think I'm an Adonis?"

"I think you have a problem skipping the question."

"I had a lot of...opportunities with a lot of unsavory people."

I took a bite of my food, deliberately taking a long time to chew. "And by people, you mean women whos bags cost more than my entire life?"

He smirked. "Shaming doesn't suit you, Cai."

I shook my head. He really was such a cocky asshole. "Not shaming - just stating."

Because our conversation died down a little, I was able to hear the whispers of the near by diners. They had noticed that the Luca Blackburn was eating dinner in such close proximity to them...and he was eating with a woman. "Do you get attacked by paparazzi?"

He shrugged, but a playful smile danced on his handsome face as he took a sip of his nasty whiskey. "I'm sure they will now that they've seen me here with a 'mystery' woman."

"Did you ever think you would live like this?" I mused, finishing off my food - it instantly made me sad. Why did good food have to disappear so quickly?

"I was hoping my father would live long enough that I wouldn't have to run his 'business'," he replied, using air quotes for the word business. "But I think in some fucked up, twisted way, I always knew it would come to this."

"This?" I gestured around us. "Not being able to go anywhere without someone noticing you - or even trying to kill you?"

He laughed, though it was short it made my heart hammer in my chest. I hated how amazing he looked tonight, how no matter how much time we spent apart it was as if nothing changed. I hated how it felt like Luca Blackburn was truly made for me.

He reached over the table and held my hand in his own, my heart now threatening to fly out of my chest. "Chaya..."

I held my breath, begging my hormones to stay in control. "Luca."

He leaned over the table, my eyes wide as his lips brushed my ear. "Did I tell you how beautiful you looked tonight? How I want to kill every single man that has looked at you tonight? How I want to tell them their eyes do not deserve to look at you?"

I could only shake my head, in fear my words would betray any confidence I had to fake.

I could feel the smirk in his words. "Have I told you yet that I want you in the most unromantic way?"

AUTHORS NOTE

hereeee are the outfits ok bye :')

(Besides the fucking corny ring, the fucking bead bracelet, pin, and necklace lmmmmfao)

also - friendly reminder, that the things in italics are flashbacks :)