Doesn't my word matter?
Doesn't what I say have any input?
Don't base everything off second hand information.
I know who I am, they don't.

I trusted you,
With my secrets,
My pain,
My demons.

I told you,
Just about everything there is to me.
All of it.
What else did you want?

Am I not enough?
Is there just not enough in me?
What makes me unworthy?
What makes me poison?

Maybe they're right.
Maybe they know that every friend I have goes rotten.
They knew just what stays on my mind,
And they said it to my face.

I trusted you,
With a part of my soul.
I told you things that I hate about myself.
And you took them as juicy gossip.

I didn't know you told anyone until it was too late.
I didn't know anyone else knew until they bullied me behind my back.
And then it got worse.
Then they said it to my face.

I didn't tell anyone I was being bullied.
It didn't matter.
Why would anyone care about me?
The last time it happened, it was all a lie.

It went away,
For a while.
The need of tears,
The craving for pain.

But it's back.
Can it be back?
Wasn't it supposed to be fixed?
Isn't time supposed to heal?

I can't say anything,
They expect me to laugh.
So I just drown,
In my silent words.

I let the words consume me,
My emotions to take over,
But only when I'm alone,
So no one can see.

I trust people,
That's the problem.
People are weak and vile and untrustworthy,
But I need them.

If you care,
If you even remember my name,
I hope you know that I'm still hurting.
I hope you feel my pain.

I trusted you,
And all you gave me was broken lies.
You spread rumors,
And felt no guilt.

And now you're back,
But it can't bother me.
So I drown in my silent words,
And keep it inside until all goes dark.