We were kissing in the bathroom. Which eventually led to making out. He was pulling me closer. My hand was gripping onto the back of his shirt. Alex put his hand on my thigh and started sliding upward. That was when I pulled back. "Alex," I mumbled. He realized what he was doing and stopped. I fixed my shirt and he fixed his.

"I..uh, s-sorry," he said. I took his hand into mine, but then quickly dropped it. He glanced at his watch. "I'm so sorry about tonight. Do you want me to take you home?" he asked.

I shrugged. "It's okay, Alex, you didn't do anything. I'll just wait for you to be ready, okay? I can just wait in a bedroom or in here..." I trailed.

"That's not why I brought you here. I can think of something else we can do in one of those room," he said softly, kissing my neck.

"Alex," I said. He stopped and looked down at his shoes. "What do you want to do?" I asked.

He shrugged. "I don't really want to be here," he admitted.

"Well I don't really want to go home. Do you want to just drive around for a while?" His face lit up. He gave me another kiss and took my hand and led me back downstairs. He put my coat on me, or Laf's coat on me, and put on his own. He told Aaron that we were going to be heading out. So we got into his car, which was freezing cold and had frost already forming on the windshield and windows.

So we just drove through the city. We had no destination, no where to be. I looked over at the clock. 1:36 am. But I didn't feel tired. I looked over at Alex, who was just about ready to pass out at the wheel. "Hey," I started, "maybe we can back to my place."

He just nodded and proceeded to turn around. About half an hour later, we got back to my apartment. Alex was tired and dragging as we went up the stairs and I unlocked the door. Laf and Hercules were sat on the couch, going over Herc's grade in French. Laf was trying to sustain a conversation and it was clear that Hercules could pick up only a few words. Which I assume that was all he needed to pass. I said hi, and introduced Alex again.

Considering it was already past two in the morning, Hercules was adjusting himself to sleep on the couch. So I took Alex to my room and told him he could sleep on my bed and I'd sleep on the floor. "We kissed, I think it's okay if we sleep in the same bed," he said. I said okay. I was about to start undressing when I remember Alex was sitting on my bed. I grabbed my shirt and a pair of sweatpants, by my sports bra was under my bed. So I couldn't get it. "Hey John," Alex mumbled, "Do you think I could take a shower? I mean, I always shower at night, unless...unless you were going to..."

A wave of relief washed over me. "Uh, no, it's fine. Go ahead. I usually shower in the morning." So he got up and went to go shower. I quickly changed into my pj's, hiding my binder under my bed and putting my sports bra on. I was at a high risk of getting caught with Alex with all of this. I let my hair down and I just felt ridiculous. It was growing and I really needed to get it cut. I'll get that taken care of tomorrow.. er, today. Whatever. I got under my sheets and started to relax and try and sleep. But I couldn't. My mind kept replaying the scene of George grabbing me in the street, at the party. Alex beating him senseless. Alex and I...kissing.

My door creaked open and I tensed up in fear. "Sorry," Alex whispered. He was just in his boxers and his hair sat at his shoulders, dripping some with the water still in it. "Do you mind if I borrow a pair of shorts?" I shook my head.

"I don't mind. They might be a-a little small though..."

He grabbed a pair of black basketball shorts from my drawer and pulled them on. "Nah, it's fine." He got into the bed and laid down facing the opposite direction. I'll admit my heart dropped a little at that. But he fell asleep fairly quickly, whereas I could barely even close my eyes. He shifted in his sleep, at least I though he was asleep and turned over to me, snaking his hand around my waist and pulling himself closer.

With his eyes still shut, he said, "John, will you please try to get some rest?" He kissed my forehead and held me tightly. I moved uncomfortably and he sat up. I turned on my lamp and sat up to face him. We were just staring at each other, but I was finding it hard to focus on his eyes when his bare chest was out in front of me. "John, what's wrong? Talk to me."

I sighed. "I just... I can't stop thinking about... About what happened on my way home, at the party. What I caused."

"John," he said, brushing my arm, "you didn't cause that, okay? George did. George is a dick, okay? He's such a douche and just wants pleasure. He wanted to hurt you. But I wanted to protect you, that's why I fought him like I did. You didn't cause anything, I promise."

I looked down and turned away from him. "I'm sorry Alex. I just... I don't know, that's never happened to me before and I'm just...I'm just shaken up I guess, I don't know." I wanted to cry. And I think Alex knew that, because when I turned around, he just held me tightly, pressing me against him.

"It's okay John, it's okay." I tugged on his arm softly, in such a childlike manner, and we laid closer to my side of the bed. I turned off the light and turned into his chest. I felt myself start to tear up then break into a full out sob. I immediately regretted it, but I couldn't stop, I just cried and cried onto him. "It's okay," he would repeat softly, brushing back my hair or kissing my forehead. "Just let it all out." And I did. But I hated every tear I shed. I was so weak, helpless, vulnerable. And I despised that.

"John, hey John, look at me." He reached over me and turned on the lamp again. He stared at me, wiping my eyes and my face. But I couldn't bring myself to look up. I felt so pathetic for crying in front of him. "Look at me, please." So I did. He kissed me. He kissed me and held me so tightly in his arms. "John, you're going to be okay. Don't think about anything George did to you. Don't think about anything else. Just focus on right now. My arms around you. I'm right here. Nothing is going to hurt you when I'm here. You'll be okay, and I'll make sure of that."

I kissed him. I kissed him for what seemed like forever. My hands cupped his cheeks. His hand moved up to my waist. I finally felt tired, and I could feel my eyes getting harder and harder to keep open. I pulled back and rubbed my eyes, wiping my face with the neckline of my shirt. I glanced at my clock. 3:42. "A-A-Alex," I hiccuped, "I'm sorry I kept you up so-so late."

He shook his head. "I want you to be okay John, even if it means losing a couple of hours of sleep. But do you think you can sleep okay now?" I nodded and turned my lamp off. We shared one last kiss and laid down. He fell asleep before I did, his arm around my waist, the other supporting his head. I was tucked into his chest, feeling the warmth and safety that emitted off of him. I finally fell asleep.

-

I woke up to my alarm, and every action felt like it was slow motion, and for some reason sore. I turned it off and rubbed my eyes. Alex was still asleep, drooling on my pillow, facing the opposite direction of which he fell asleep, his limps spread amongst the sheets. I crawled towards him and put my head on his chest, and, almost out of habit, his arm came and wrapped around me protectively. I fell asleep again.

-

There was a very loud knock on the apartment door. I was just lying face down on the mattress. Alex wasn't there anymore. My heart sunk. I got up and opened the door. There was Alex. He was with Hercules, carrying bags of takeout food. I smiled some before checking the clock. It was around 2:30, yet my body still felt sluggish. Alex smiled at me and kissed my cheek, putting down the food.

"I didn't even feel you move."

"I didn't want to wake you up," he said. He wrapped his arms around me and I felt so warm and so safe. "Now come eat, please." He took my hand and guided me to the kitchen like a child. I took my place on the countertop and Alex and I shared a burger, to Alex's dismay. He wanted me to eat something, which I was, but I could tell Alex isn't really one to share his food.

"Why'd you let me sleep so late?" I asked out in general.

"You were tired," Laf said.

"I thought you'd wake up earlier," Hercules admitted.

"You're cute when you sleep," Alex smirked, "and we did stay up really late, so I wanted you to get some sleep."

Hercules and Lafayette laughed. "So smooth," Hercules teased. I blushed and proceeded to pick at the fried between Alex and I. "So, the four of us are going to the movies. You ought to go shower, John. The movie's at 4." So I hopped off the countertop and headed to the bathroom. That's when I remembered I needed to grab my binder. So I tried to sneak into my room to get it quickly.

But I couldn't find it. It wasn't where I left it.