I was the first one up, as usual, but the sun hadn't risen yet. According to the fancy clock on the wall it was only four or so in the morning. I turned on one lamp, all the light I would need for just sitting there. I didn't know why I traded sitting on my bed and watching TV to sitting on a couch and watching TV, I had to say it wasn't much of a difference. The Careers were up and moving again, making sure all their stuff was accounted for and that everyone was still there. Not like it would matter if someone actually got lost or ran off, one less person to kill. The girl had slept on the edge of the volcano but didn't look like she had gotten enough sleep at all, probably ran all the way down just to sleep in some peace. John was on his feet; throwing his sword in the air and trying to flip it to catch the handle, but it went too far up and spun oddly because of the dent in the blade, causing him to jump out of the way to avoid accidental injury. I smiled weakly, once a klutz always a klutz apparently. I really hope he makes it out, sometimes I think I hope too much. If he didn't I think my entire world would shatter, I had already decided that I would follow him if he ended up going upstairs. I knew Molly and Mrs. Hudson would be completely heartbroken to find me dead, but what was I supposed to do? This was why I wasn't allowed to get attached so easily, because nothing lasts forever, especially when the Hunger Games was involved.

"You're up early." Mrs. Hudson said, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"So are you." I pointed out.

"Not really." She sighed.

"Usually Molly is up before you."

"Well then she was sleeping in I guess." Mrs. Hudson decided. I rolled my eyes; I could figure that out myself thank you.

"You alright after last night?" She asked.

"Why does everyone ask me that? Of course I'm fine, it was a dream!" I pointed out.

"Yes of course, but you tend to hold onto things longer than necessary." She pointed out.

"It was just a dream; I'll get over it eventually." I shrugged. She just raised an eyebrow with doubt and went back to making whatever she was making. My guess was tea, hot chocolate, or coffee, knowing her. 

"Well, if you need anyone to talk to about it, we're both here." she sighed, but she was waiting her breath and I think she knew that. I didn't go to people for help, I wasn't the type of person to let someone into my problems, John was the first one that I told anything to and I guess he really is my problem at the moment. She dumped mini marshmallows in the cup so it had to be hot chocolate, walking over to the living room and sitting in the armchair. At the moment the Careers were discussing where they were going to go next, they knew that the volcano would explode and they weren't sure if they wanted to hunt the tributes down or bait them into the lava. I really hoped they were stupid enough to try the lava thing, I knew that John wouldn't be so easily tricked into that stuff, but if they did get down there then they'd have the girl.

"I have a feeling these games might get violent." Mrs. Hudson shrugged.

"Oh great, that was just what I wanted to hear." I muttered.

"I didn't mean that in a bad way, but..."

"There is no good way to say that. If it's violent John either gets brutally murdered or he has to do the murdering himself, and that won't help him sleep at night I can tell you that." I pointed out.

"Well you'll be the first to know I guess." Mrs. Hudson said with a little smile.

"Maybe the reason I never had feelings for anyone before is because you two always make fun of me for it." I snapped. She just shrugged her shoulder innocently, and I could tell she wanted to say more on the topic but Molly walked in, ruining whatever her genius comeback had been.

"Good morning all." She muttered, yawning and shuffling around the hardwood floor with her pink slippers. I always thought those things were ridiculous, when I was a tribute I actually think I tried to hide them in the lobby just to get rid of them. "How are you after, you know, that?" she asked, sitting on the empty couch opposite of me.

"I think I should just tattoo 'I'm fine' across my forehead, so when I get asked how I'm feeling for the billionth time I don't have to waste my breath." I snapped.

"Then you'd be lying to everyone and to yourself because most times you're not exactly fine." Molly defended.

"That's a bit harsh." I pointed out. Mrs. Hudson just rolled her eyes at me as if I was being annoying, but really I didn't care. Before John came they'd tiptoe around me and my little fits and now they were poking at the monster with a stick and laughing at it.

"But are you okay? You gave us all a little shock last night, thought you were dying." Molly pointed out.

"What was I doing?" I asked.

"You were screaming John a lot, sometimes you'd just scream to make noise." Mrs. Hudson sighed.

"Well nothing different then." I shrugged.

"What was the dream about dear?" Mrs. Hudson asked.

"That is definitely not your business." I pointed out with a sarcastic laugh.

"Fair enough dear." Mrs. Hudson sighed. I looked back at the TV, now John was on screen, looking around the rocks with confusion, as if he didn't know where to go. He looked very rugged after how many days in the arena, his clothes in tatters, his face and body scratched and bandaged, his hair and skin a dirty mess, but the look suited him I suppose. He seemed to expect something was coming, he had watched these games before and once the landscape started to come into play then you know something is about to happen to end it. Now he was having the same mental battle as the Careers, go to the volcano to where there might be tributes and do your best to fight them or run as far as possible from that lava. In the end he started to walk towards the volcano, I didn't know if that was a dumb move or not. The camera switched to over top of the volcano, a camera that I was sure would have some complications soon, but it was bubbling and smoking very close to the edge. The girl on the mountain didn't look battle ready at all, and I kind of felt bad for her, but you never knew what she was capable of either. Even though she has a pocket knife she could be very agile, getting the others in the lava while she merely watched or something. I knew the boy from one wasn't about to do any gymnastics anytime soon, so she could have an advantage over him. Breakfast arrived shortly after, the Avoxes disappearing to who knows where, but I guess I was the only one that actually thought about that too much. We all sat around the table and said the prayer, mostly for John but also for the other tributes just so we don't sound biased.

"Where do the Avoxes even come from?" I asked.

"They're criminals remember? Snow catches them and cuts out their tongues." Molly pointed out as if that was totally normal, drowning her waffles in syrup.

"No, in the house, they go down the hallway but where do they go?" I asked.

"There's a service elevator behind one of the doors I believe." Mrs. Hudson guessed, getting an approving nod from Molly. I nodded, that should've been obvious, but it was better to learn I guess.

"So this is it then, hopefully the games will end today." Molly decided.

"What time?" I asked.

"When most people can flock around the TV and leaving enough time for the crowning ceremony, so around lunch time I suppose." Mrs. Hudson decided. I tried not to be too worried, maybe John could do this, pull the same miracle I had last year around this time.

"He'll be fine." Molly assured, reading my thoughts. I just shrugged, leaning back and not even picking at any food. I was terrified, this was it, we all knew that, tonight would come and John would either be the victor or he would be dead. I didn't talk anymore, lost in my thoughts and when we were finally able to leave the table I went back to my room, curtains and doors shut. I sat in the darkness staring a point in space, trying to keep myself from doing anything stupid like cry. I knew that there would be tears either way, whether they are happy tears or not they would come. The syringe sat on the dresser again, but I ignored it, I absolutely couldn't use it now because if he doesn't make it out I'll need at least four of those things at a time just to close my eyes. I turned on the TV, watching as the Careers moved close to the volcano. John was walking that way too, practicing his battle swings as he walked. I got a hit of second hand embarrassment since he was pretty bad with a sword, but I just had to hope he was smart enough to use the elements to his advantage. He ate and drank also, he seemed to know that this might be the end so he wasn't bothering with rationing. I thought that was a mistake, you never know how long the final battle will go. One time the battle lasted two days because it was more an archery thing, shoot, hide, pick up the enemy's arrows and repeat. It got very dull, but I guess it was good thing John didn't have a bow. It switched to the girl, who was walking among the rocks, and in the direction she was going I was sure she'd run into John or the Careers. I hoped it was the Careers though, the less blood John had on his hands the better. I knew it would be hard for him the next couple of days if he does make it out. He'll need me as much or even more than I need him, and he'll be undernourished. The worst part of the whole victor thing, in my opinion, was the paparazzi. Anywhere you go there's a camera watching, I hated the total lack of privacy. I remember after they let me off of the plane I was almost blinded by the cameras, the noise, too many people in my opinion. I remember stepping off and seeing Mrs. Hudson and Molly waiting, their smiles brighter than the camera flashes, and that was the moment where I actually had hope. From then on my life would be a dream, money, fame, a nice house for both me and my family, anything I wanted I could have, that hope was so false that it was almost a joke. After the games you turned out like me, nightmares, drugs, paranoia, the whole package hand delivered by the reaper himself. It was worse than death, part of me had wished that the tribute had killed me, that I got blown up with the tributes, it would've been a lot easier. I'd just be another wooden box buried in the ground. Positive thinking, as ever. It made me wonder if Irene's coffin was at Twelve yet, probably was, I hoped shipping was free. I hated to think of her family now, head of the market according to her, but even the snobby rich families didn't deserve to see their child get stabbed to death on live TV, especially when some people cheered about it. I hated people, I hated that bloody president, this town, this Capital, everything but John, my family, Molly, and Mrs. Hudson deserved to burn. It showed John again, he was humming something and held my note in his hand, reading it as he walked and almost falling over a rock that was sticking out of the ground. I didn't know the purpose of reading it over and over, maybe remembering me, that I was watching, motivation to keep going? Either way I was touched, no one was really sentimental about anything I give them much less a hand written note. He smiled to himself, and it warmed my heart to see that. He was still alive as of now, it would all be okay. By lunch time the arena got darker, John was looking at the sky with confusion but he kept walking, stuffing the note in his pocket and holding his sword tighter. The Careers were high fiving each other one last time, knowing that in the end they're probably going to end up killing each other. They knew this was the end. The girl didn't look as excited as they did; she knew she was going to die eventually. But with all these negative expectations watch her just come out on top, wouldn't that be a plot twist. It was John again; the volcano was in his sights. The sun was practically gone now; the only light was the artificial moon and stars to guide him along the rocks. Thankfully he had enough brains to not lie down and sleep, he kept walking.

"Sherlock we think it's coming, do you want to come out here with us?" Molly asked, knocking softly on my door. Did I want to watch it out there?

"I'll stay here!" I decided, if I was going to cry I was going to cry alone.

"Are you sure?" Molly asked. She sounded worried, and she had every right to be, she didn't know what I was going to do, if John died then would I just get it over with immediately?

"I'm fine Molly, go away!" I snapped. I heard her retreating footsteps, part of me wishing that she'd pick the lock and stay with me since I was too stubborn to admit that I was terrified. I didn't want it to be over; I didn't want to have to watch him die or kill, there was no good way out of this and I'd sit here, in the dark lonesome and face all of it by myself. I wanted to tell him I loved him one last time, before it all ended or all began. All I did was love him. I sighed, watching the Careers hold as many weapons as they could; one had a long sword, a knife on their belt and a bow slung over their back. They looked intimidating, but with all that weight they'd fall faster. The girl was sharpening a stick with the pocket knife, a good intention but a stick would be nothing against iron and it was only dulling the pocket knife blade. She was at the base of the volcano, I guess they all knew that it would go down there, win or lose it would end.