Chapter 10 - The way you did once upon a dream
Loki waited impatiently for Sigyn, staring at his mirror. He froze when he finally saw her appear. It was like a reflection in water at first; unclear, with shaky blurred edges but sharpening with every step until Sigyn appeared to be standing right in front of Loki. And then, in the blink of an eye, she was.
It wasn't at all like stepping out. More like being pushed out forcefully, really. But Sigyn still managed even that with the grace and composure of a Queen. When her feet touched the floor of his bedchamber, their eyes met. Propelled by longing, Loki rushed to wrap her in his arms.
"I'm sorry for not coming myself," he said. "I wanted to, but they wouldn't let me. I didn't know how else to —"
Sigyn cut him off by pulling him down and pressing her mouth on his. Loki instantly melted into her kiss and forgot what he'd meant to say. The power she had over him was indescribable.
"Don't." Sigyn breathed against his lips. "Don't tell me how you couldn't be with me and just be with me."
Another kiss. Longer. Deeper. Stronger.
"Hmm, not here," said Loki, reluctant to stop. "I don't want them to catch us."
"Where then?"
"Can you take me with you? Through the mirror? There's something I want to show you."
"I don't know." She drew back, turning her head to look at their reflections. "I never tried taking someone with me before."
"You can do it. I trust you."
Sigyn's eyes glistened at his words. She had probably never heard those words before. No one had ever trusted her with anyone or anything because no one had ever thought her capable. Loki understood better than she knew — though admittedly, the not-trusting part was his own fault for playing mischief.
The maiden took the Prince's hand and pulled him with her. She took a deep breath, stretching her other hand to the surface of the mirror. Her fingers touched the glass. Their reflections faded. She glanced back at him.
"Don't let go," she said.
"Never."
***
The dark world behind the mirror seemed less warm this time. Perhaps it was Loki's presence that made it so. He had a certain refreshing allure around him, which was one of the reasons Sigyn felt so at ease with him. She was glad to see Loki crossed through in one piece. Already, Loki was absorbed by the place she hadn't shared with anyone until now. She understood. This place was impressive, if not terrifying, to anyone seeing it for the first time.
Hundreds of frameless looking glasses floated about them, attached to nothing but the void. Sigyn often peered at the different people and creatures inhabiting the Nine Realms through them. Her favourites were the ones leading to the most extraordinary of them all, named Midgard. Only a few times had she actually dared to step through and visit. Always when no one was around, and never for longer than a few minutes.
"Which is the closest one to the Urdarbrunn?" Loki asked then.
Sigyn led him on a swirling path, showing him the rippling pools on either side which formed the portals to nature's mirrors. They passed a swan lake in Midgard, a mighty river in Vanaheim, the tundra of Jotünheim... Loki's eyes searched for anything he recognised lying near the mountain where the glen was hidden, all the while holding on to Sigyn's hand. It was the most natural feeling. When Sigyn drew him to a deep blue pool, his mouth dropped.
"But this is —"
"The Urdarbrunn itself," finished Sigyn, gleaming at his wonder. "I was surprised to find it here as well. Especially since you told me there was no other way in."
"I didn't think there was."
Sigyn sank down and touched the water. The ripples grew until they reached the other side of the pool. The water, neither cold nor warm, slithered up her arm like a snake, and gradually spread from her to Loki. He remained remarkably calm at what was happening. But considering he was a sorcerer himself and thus no stranger to magic, that wasn't so surprising.
The maiden closed her eyes and let the water take her. When she smelled the fresh air and tasted the mist from the waterfall on her lips, she knew her feet had safely touched the banks of the pool in the glen itself. Loki pinched her hand. Sigyn opened her eyes... and gasped.
Before her, beneath the great tree, stood a canopy bed. The light see-through veils were pushed aside, the white silk sheets drawn back. The fireflies that usually flew free around the water at night were huddled together around the bedposts, imitating the glow of lanterns. Rose petals lay cast around in the grass — white petals with blue veins.
Sigyn slowly turned to Loki. He looked at her expectantly, waiting for her reaction. But she was too stunned at this fairy tale scene to speak in coherent sentences.
"What...? H-How did...? When?"
He chuckled. "All day really. I have to admit I changed my mind a few times, as I realised it is a most indecent proposal, but... I am making it to you, nonetheless."
"Loki... No, I... We cannot stay here, however much I want to. Astrid will return soon, and when she sees me gone —"
"She won't. Not if you do the same thing you did when you came to me that morning."
Sigyn blushed at the memory. "I didn't really mean to harm you then. Nor to deceive you."
"You did wonderfully well," complimented Loki with a grin. "Have you been coming here on your own to train your magic?"
"Sometimes. At night, when Astrid sleeps. I feel good here. But it was the first time I tried that. I did not think I would succeed."
"I knew you could do it. Your magic is unique, Sigyn. The Urdarbrunn nurtures and gives you the control you need."
Sigyn cast her eyes down. Her lip trembled.
"I lost control," she spoke in a tiny voice. "Realising I couldn't have anything I wanted... It infuriated me. I couldn't hold on to my magic any longer. I couldn't hold on to... to you, and I —"
"Ssh, don't think about that anymore. I am here with you. I will help you."
Loki lifted her head by her chin to make Sigyn look into his ice-blue eyes. It was the first time she didn't see them filled with mischief. What lay in his eyes now, though... Was this what they called love?
She let Loki take hold of her hands. Her breath caught when the serpent pendant at her bosom glowed in a faint green hue, the snake's scale becoming colder with every second that passed. Two figures appeared beside them, an exact copy of each. Sigyn saw her own face smiling at her, whereas Loki's just nodded in approval.
"Send us through," said his doppelgänger. "We'll make our way to our own chambers. No one will ever suspect you're actually here."
"I-I am not sure I am strong enough to keep the magic up like that," said Sigyn.
"Of course you are," said her own double. "Now you are. You sensed it, didn't you?"
Both Lokies glanced at each other before turning to their respective Sigyn with raised brows. Her copy merely winked and took fake-Loki's hand. They stepped toward the water and waited. Sigyn knelt to touch the water, her copy mimicking her action. Then she quickly drew back and let the water take them into the mirror world. Her hand stretched out over the surface, following them both. Once she sensed them step through two different mirrors, she dared to breathe again.
"What was that about?" the real Loki left with her asked her curiously. "What did you sense?"
"A connection, I think," answered Sigyn. "Between us. If that is even possible."
Loki stared at her, eyes wide and mouth half agape. He then licked and pressed his lips together. Sigyn didn't like the way his expression had changed so quickly. He seemed contrite, almost guilt-ridden.
"Sigyn, I... I must confess something to you," said Loki. "And I must ask you to let me finish before you say something yourself."
"What is it?" Fear build up inside her.
"Since my mother told us Thor's betrothed was coming to live with us before the wedding, I wanted to devise... a scheme. Something to stir a bit of chaos. Then you arrived. An innocent maiden, with a mind of your own, who didn't just swoon over Thor. I planned to... use you. Make you fall for me instead of my brother. Make you lie with me before the wedding took place and reveal it then, so Thor stood shamed. I didn't care what would happen after, I just... wanted mischief. And then your magic came out, wild and uncontrollable. It was the perfect excuse for me to seek you out further, under the guise of training. It meant nothing to me."
Sigyn pursed her lips and swallowed back the tears welling in her eyes. She hung her head.
It meant nothing... Of course not... Why did I ever expect it would have? He is the Trickster. A name well-earned, it seems... I am such a fool.
"At least... that is what I told myself then."
Sigyn glanced up through her lashes.
"The truth is," Loki continued, "being with you means everything. Not a day goes by when I do not think of you. Not a night goes by when I do not dream of you. I crave you like one would water when lost in the desert. More so, even. I never thought anyone could make me feel so... alive, but you have, Sigyn. You stirred something within me. I didn't realise what it was until you just said you sensed a connection. It's our magic. It bonded."
Loki took Sigyn in his arms, locking his icy eyes with her emeralds. Her hands rested against his chest. She felt his heart beating steadily, while her own thumped wildly.
"When the magic of two mages binds," he said, "they will always find each other, even when they are worlds apart. Not even death can separate them. Be mine, my heart. And I swear I'll be yours. Only yours."
"Loki..."
He leaned in. Their lips found each other. A mere brush at first. Then more pressing. More loving. More yearning. Sigyn moved her hands to the nape of Loki's neck, making sure he couldn't pull away from her. His own lay in the small of her back, pushing her against his strong, slender body.
In one swift motion, Loki loosened Sigyn's hair, dropping her ribbon on the ground. A red waterfall fell around her shoulders. She shivered. Not from cold, but from excitement. Their kiss grew intense and exceedingly more passionate. Sigyn felt Loki's tongue prodding at her lips. She parted them. They clutched at each other, driven by their hunger, and gave in to almost animalistic drifts. Heat built inside of Sigyn. For a moment, she believed her magic was surging, but then she realised it was a different sort of heat. Good. Natural. And oh, so wonderful.
Sigyn tangled her fingers in Loki's raven black hair, seeking something to hold on to. He grunted, low in his throat. His hands pushed her against him again, and Sigyn gasped in their kiss when she felt something hard against her abdomen. They parted, both out of breath, to gaze into each other's eyes.
The thundering sound of the waterfall faded into nothing. Above them, the stars and moon glistened in the dark-blue night sky, but neither Sigyn nor Loki noticed. How could they, when ice and emeralds were so much more bewitching than diamonds?
Loki smiled and closed the distance between them again. Between their kisses, they moved closer to the bed. The grass felt like a carpet of clouds underneath their bare feet. Loki meant to push Sigyn down when they reached it, but she was faster. She moved her hands away from Loki's neck, grabbed his shirt, and spun him around. He fell backwards onto the bed. Sigyn straddled him, and he sat up to take her mouth to his again. His kiss, however ardent, could not distract Sigyn from what his hands were doing.
The laces of her dress, hastily fitted together, easily came undone. The sleeves slipped off her shoulders, together with the thin undergarment she wore underneath. She shrugged it off, revealing her milky-white skin to the light of the moon above and the warm gold of the surrounding fireflies. Wanting to even the playing field, Sigyn pulled Loki's black shirt over his head. She pressed her breasts to him, shivering at the touch of his cool skin. They kissed again, but Loki did not linger on her lips. Instead, he planted fervent kisses on Sigyn's jawline, her neck, her collarbone...
When he came to her breasts, Loki briefly glanced up at Sigyn before dipping to lick her nipple. She shut her eyes to the marvellous memory of when he'd done this the night she came to him. Seemed his silver tongue had more than one good use. She hummed in appreciation until...
"Ah!"
Sigyn pushed Loki back on the bed, shooting him a reprimanding glare at having bitten her. He grinned, eyes sparkling with mischief. She hook her head at him. Little Trickster... Her Trickster.
Loki's fingers started picking up the skirts of her dress, and he sat up again to pull the garment over her head, flinging it onto the grass where his shirt lay. Then he turned them both over, so he lay on top. A lock of raven hair fell in front of his eyes. Sign pushed it away, making him smile again. How she adored his smile.
Her hands trailed down his back. She went under the waistline of his black pants to slip them off, but Loki grabbed a wrist to stop her. He rolled off Sigyn and removed them himself. Her eyes widened when she saw how well endowed he was.
Sigyn had seen naked men before; her brothers and their friends had not exactly bothered to keep her that innocent when they ordered her to draw them baths after training. But none could compare to the man who was with her now. So dazzling, so breathtaking, so... glorious.
She blushed as Loki gazed upon her naked body as well, never having given herself so openly, so willingly. That one night of playful touching and kissing Thor had been the closest she ever came to intimacy. To think that it would happen now with his brother...
Loki must've noticed her silent stress, for he asked, "Have you ever lain with someone before?"
"No," Sigyn admitted. "Does... that bother you? That I'm not... experienced?"
"Not at all. It means a lot to me that you would trust me with your maidenhood. Only, a first time can be... painful."
She tilted her head at him. The way he said that... Did sex hurt a man as well? With another man, perhaps, but surely not with a woman? Oh, unless...
"You sound as if you went through it yourself?" she asked. "By magic?"
"Yes." Loki sighed and cast his eyes down. "I've used my shapeshifting abilities on myself in the past. Not often, but I'm comfortable in either form. Or I used to be, anyway."
Noticing the strain in his voice, Sigyn decided not to press further. His confession already explained some little things she'd noted about Loki before. Like, how his nails were sometimes painted, or how one pair of boots had higher heels than any of the ladies' at court, or the faint kohl-line stressing his eyes during dinners. She doubted anyone else had noticed his feminine side, but did wonder if his family knew. If not Odin and Thor, surely his mother.
It didn't matter to her, of course. This changed nothing about Loki. And she was certain he would entrust her with his history in due time. Norns knew she tried to escape her own and wouldn't confide in just anyone, either. Who was she to judge another?
"Thank you for telling me," she said.
Loki looked up, seemingly surprised at her words. She brought him close and kissed his lips. The tension on his body briefly held instantly dissipated. When they parted, he said, "If you feel any pain, just tell me. I'll stop, I promise."
Sigyn's belly fluttered with butterflies. As she lay back, the veils closed around them, as if to keep what was to happen forever a secret. Her legs parted. Her body trembled. Loki lay down beside her, keeping himself propped up on his elbow, and caressed her face lovingly. It immediately calmed Sigyn.
Their lips locked together again. Loki caressed her skin with the tip of his fingers as he moved his hand down her body. Sigyn's heart nearly jumped out of her chest at his enticing strokes. When he went further down, she had to fight the urge to press her legs together. But Loki still caught that brief flinch.
"Close your eyes," he whispered.
Sigyn inhaled deeply. She did as she was told and waited. Her breath caught as Loki caressed her inner thigh, sending titillations through her core. His fingers delved between her folds. Sigyn quivered at their icy touch. Her legs parted more, granting Loki better access. The sensation between them shifted when he stroked up. Loki pushed a single finger against the little nub she'd touched a few times herself, finding pleasure shooting through her body.
"Oh, my... Loki..."
As his name fell from her lips, Loki continued to tease her with smooth, rolling circles. She gripped the bedcover when he expertly slipped down to her entrance, gliding through her wetness, and pushed two fingers in. Each come-hither motion drew a moan from Sigyn. Never had she felt this elated.
Then, the movements stilled, and those skilful fingers were gone. Sigyn opened her eyes when she felt Loki's weight shift. He moved between her legs, hovering over her body. His eyes searched hers for permission.
"Make me yours," she said.
"Make me yours," he repeated.
A tiny yelp escaped Sigyn when Loki's hard member entered her, dipping itself in her heat. She gripped his body. Loki wasn't wrong; it hurt. But she wouldn't make him stop. Instead, he held off on his own once he was fully sheathed inside her. She gazed back into Loki's eyes as the pain waned, realising he was doing this to help her. His consideration only strengthened her love for him.
At her reassuring nod, Loki began to move. He retreated and thrust, the same action, over and over again. Slowly but fiercely. And with every movement, Sigyn could only think of one thing — how perfectly well they fitted together.
She arched her back, rolling her pelvis. Each motion sent a fresh wave of sensations through her, and soon enough, her own body moved along with Loki, picking up on his rhythm. Sigyn's moans aroused him more, and he moved faster. He groaned when her nails dug into his back and pulled her down on his next thrust. Sigyn cried out. Loki kept hitting that same spot, driving her to complete surrender. Despite the overwhelming ecstasy, Sigyn continued to meet his feverish onslaught, until Loki's hips jerked violently, and his seed filled her.
Their sweat-covered bodies glistened in the fireflies and moonlight's glow. Loki leaned his forehead against Sigyn's shoulder, panting heavily. Sigyn herself could barely catch her own breath. She stroked her lover's hair and kissed his brow, the simple action helping her focus in steadying her racing heart.
"My love," she whispered.
Loki lifted his head. A sudden blaze brightened his eyes, as if her words had released his inner beast. She then found his member was still inside her — hard.
"Say that again," he ordered, raising himself up.
"My love. My lo—ah!" Sigyn threw her head back at his forceful thrust. "Norns, Loki!"
No doubts anymore. No unspoken words anymore. All had been done, and all had been said. For tonight, there would be no talk of what had been or what could have been. Only of what was. Two persons, alone in their universe, admitting at last that they loved each other and giving in to the yearning that had bewitched their hearts from the moment they met.
***
"They have returned."
Thor rose from the steps of Heimdall's home at the sound of his friend's voice.
"Together?" he asked fearfully.
"No, each is in their own chamber, and Astrid is with Lady Sigyn now."
The Crown Prince raked a hand through his hair with a deep sigh. He had a feeling something would occur the moment he stepped out of Sigyn's room, so he went straight to Heimdall to ask for his help. But by the time he arrived at the Himinbjörg, Sigyn had already vanished from the Guardian's vision. As had Loki.
"What am I to do, Heimdall? I cannot go to my father with suspicions alone, even with you as my witness. You see them disappear, sometimes alone, sometimes together, but it's not enough. Loki will certainly have a reply ready when we question him."
"You spoke of a necklace Loki gave you for Lady Sigyn. Can you retrieve it?"
"Sigyn never takes it off. And after what happened, I dare not ask her to do so. She will believe I no longer care for her."
"Her wearing it constantly may be all the proof you require." Thor's furrowed brow, prompting Heimdall to continue. "There are two possibilities where the necklace is concerned. Either Lady Sigyn is aware the necklace actually belongs to Loki, or she is not. If she does not know, she wears it because she believes it is yours, and she yet cares enough for you to wear your gift for the whole of Asgard to see. But if she does know —"
"She is already under my brother's influence," finished Thor with an understanding nod.
He balled his fists. If he was to discover the truth, he had to handle this with care. Perhaps Astrid could be persuaded to help. She had, after all, helped Thor in keeping Loki away while Sigyn lay unconscious. And the Warriors Three could... On second thought, no. At least, not all of them.
Volstagg couldn't keep a secret if his life depended on it, and Hogun wouldn't act in any way he deemed dishonourable. Fandrall was the same, but could probably be swayed by Astrid. That left Sif. She was perhaps the best option out of all his friends, with her naturally suspicious disposition against Loki. And Thor had noticed she was jealous of Sigyn, though for the life of him, he couldn't figure out why — nor had he thought it wise to ask.
"If I may..."
Thor was pulled out of his musings by Heimdall's hesitant voice. He urged the Gatekeeper to continue with a beckoning gesture.
"Forgive me if I speak out of turn, but are you certain of the Queen's intent?" asked Heimdall.
"What do you mean?"
"You told me she was quick to defend Loki when you spoke to her."
"Aye, she told me Loki meant Sigyn no harm."
"I find it peculiar she is so assured of this," said Heimdall. "I would have believed she would have at least listened to you, as I have. If only to investigate the matter further herself. Yet she dismissed it immediately."
"Heimdall, take care of how you speak," warned Thor, eyes darting around the Himinbjörg. "You know both Frigga and Odin have their own ways of seeing and hearing what goes on in Asgard."
"Precisely."
Thor drew back, dumbstruck at what Heimdall was suggesting. Could Frigga truly know more than she was letting on? He'd voiced his concerns to his mother about Sigyn's apparent magical powers and his brother's attention, and Frigga had managed to reassure him both times.
Still, it would not be unimaginable. The Queen knew exactly how to say things in a way that made them true, but was not necessarily the entire truth — a skill which Loki also excelled at, unfortunately. Yet whatever Frigga kept hidden, she always did so for a reason.
***
They made love all night, fuelled by the passion and desire they inspired in each other. The hours passed far too quickly. Sigyn dreaded the sunrise. For when the dawn came, she would have to part from the man she loved and go back to being his brother's betrothed. But until then, she would enjoy what little time remained with her lover.
Sigyn lay on her side in Loki's arms, her curves fitting perfectly with his as her head rested on his shoulder. Their bodies were covered to their waists under the silk sheets. Sigyn's hair shielded her bare breasts. Despite lying like this, she wasn't cold. She never was. It seemed impossible with a fire burning inside her. Therefore, it amazed Sigyn she was aware of how cool Loki's skin was. It felt so nice.
She moved closer to the chill of his body and sensed how even her magic embraced it, the serpent pendant tingling at her bosom. Loki's necklace glowed faintly in response. She traced its outlines, but halted when he stirred and woke.
"I'm sorry." Sigyn leaned her chin on the hands resting on his chest. "I didn't mean to wake you."
"I'm glad you did. You are a sight worth waking for." Loki pulled Sigyn up to him, kissing her lovingly on her lips. He then looked up at the sky and heaved a sigh. "It's nearly dawn."
Sigyn pressed her lips together and cast her eyes down to hide her sorrow, but Loki still noticed.
"My heart?" He cupped her face. "What is it? Why are you crying?"
"Tell me it was all a dream." Her voice broke. "Tell me I will wake in my chamber and this did not happen. Tell me I have not broken my vow to your family in giving you everything. Please tell me it was a dream, for I cannot bear the thought of this being real. I cannot bear the thought of leaving here, having done this for one night, and pretending not to love you, Loki."
His arms held her closer. His lips kissed her temple.
"We have both dreamed of this. And they say if you dream a thing more than once, it is certain to come true. We are real, my heart. Do not ask me to lie to you now. I never have, and I never will, I promise. Just like I promise you this." Loki sat straight, taking Sigyn up with him. He took her left hand, placed it on his pendant, and then placed his own on hers. "Sigyn, you hold my body, my soul, my love. I bind myself to you and will always find you, no matter where you are. For I am yours, now and far longer than forever."
Sigyn stared at Loki, eyes wide with shock. Those words were a wedding vow. Her heart leapt, shouting at her to say the words back to him.
"I-I cannot," she stammered. "Your brother —"
"Does not love you," said Loki fiercely. "And you do not love him. You never have. Sigyn, please hear me. Your engagement is already ruined. You gave yourself to me. And even if you had not, Thor broke the betrothal first by lying with Aelsa. Was your vow ever for my brother, even? Do you remember if he was named, either when you spoke to my mother or when your family agreed to the match?"
Sigyn bit her lip as she recalled the Queen's visit to her home. Frigga had asked if she wished to come to Asgard to marry her son and live like a Princess until she was ready to take her place as Queen. She'd mentioned both Thor and Loki, but it was common knowledge the Crown Prince was to marry first. He was the heir. He was to have a wife and children of his own to succeed the Allfather. Why would Frigga seek a bride for the second son if the first was still unmarried?
"My mother chooses her words carefully," Loki continued at Sigyn's silence. "You may have noticed I do the same. There is power in what words are spoken and how they are spoken. Vows, deals, even spells. There is always a loophole if you search long enough. So I ask again, do you remember who my mother named your husband?"
Sigyn sighed. "She mentioned both your names. She constantly spoke of you and Thor."
Loki scoffed. "Of course she would. Sigyn, I know you want to stay true and loyal, but my brother does not deserve you. I'm not even sure I do, but the one thing I am sure of is that I love you. And I am willing to risk everything for you."
Their pendants glowed again, a faint golden shimmer shining through their fingers. Loki's words seemed to make their bond stronger still. It appeared there was some truth in what he said. Perhaps there was truth in his suspicions about her betrothal as well.
"Loki," said Sigyn, "you hold my body, my soul, my love. I bind myself to you and will always find you, no matter where you are. For I am yours, now and far longer than forever."
A wave of magic rippled through the glen like a breeze. They stayed still as the serpents came to life and slithered underneath their palms. It wasn't until the pair lifted their hands that they saw each pendant no longer held one, but two serpents. They were entwined with each other, bonded through magic and love, as Sigyn and Loki now were.
If only this had been enough. But Sigyn and Loki's hardships were just about to begin.
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