"Come on Jimin, come on pick up." Jungkook muttered, biting his nail as he paced around the entrance to Jimin's apartment complex. He pulled down his hat to cover his face further, hoping it kept him from any prying eyes glancing his way.

"Hey." Jimin's voice flooded in from the other side of the phone, the ringing finally over. Jungkook sighed in relief, breaking into a nervous smile.

"Can you ring me in? I'm at your building."

Silence drew for a second too long before Jimin hung up. Jungkook blinked, slightly shocked before he heard the doors buzz and unlock. He slid his phone quickly into his pocket before making his way inside, glad for the warmth in the building as he headed to the elevator and punched in Jimin's penthouse floor.

"Come on, come on." He urged the elevator to go faster.

When the doors finally opened to Jimin's living room, Jungkook's jaw dropped.

Jimin looked stunning. Well, he was beautiful no matter what he wore or how he presented himself, but tonight Jimin radiated. His lips were a warm pink against a peach shadow above his eyes. He wore a crop top with long sleeves that hug close to his skin and paired it with tight black pants. Silver jewelry on his fingers and dangling from his ear popped against the ensemble and caused his brown eyes to sparkle.

"Where you heading to?" Jungkook asked, knowing Jimin wouldn't go just anywhere looking like that. The man favored Jungkook's hoodies for the most part unless he had a reason to dress up.

The second the words left his lips, Jungkook knew he said the wrong thing. Jimin's expression tightened and there was a slight roll to his eyes despite tears lining them. His cheeks were red, warm with anger and disappointment.

Jungkook grimaced when he noticed.

"A party, Jungkook." Jimin answered, his voice sharp despite his defeated expression. "I don't want to spend my birthday alone."

"Jimin," Jungkook said, taking a step in Jimin's direction. He reached out for him, but Jimin took a step back, shaking his head.

Jungkook stood with his hand out, frozen for a second before it dropped back down to his side.

"Sorry," Jimin said as he scraped away a stray tear that streaked down his face. "I'm a little emotional right now."

"Jimin, I'm so sorry. I got distracted this week. If you'd just let me explain."

"I waited for you, Jungkook." Jimin said, wrapping his hands around his frame and hugging his elbows to his chest, refusing to fall apart. Jimin sucked in one slow breath and then let his arms go, squaring his shoulders back and his gaze finally growing a type of cold Jungkook only felt when he'd first met Jimin back on set.

"I can explain, really. I promise." Jungkook tried again.

"Well, I have fifteen minutes before my driver is here, so better hurry up." Jimin said.

"Jimin, I saw Namjoon last week. With his wife."

Jimin blinked. "I know. You told me, remember. After we had sex and then you ... just disappeared." Jimin's ears went a little red as he spoke, looking down at the floor before putting his gaze back on Jungkook.

Jungkook's heart dropped in his chest. He was so caught up in the whole Namjoon thing he hadn't taken a second to think what that had to have looked like to Jimin.

"Shit, Jimin, I'm so sorry. I - I don't think it hit me until later just how much seeing them together rattled me. Waking up next to you, holding you, it felt so normal that I thought maybe I really was completely okay. That it didn't bother me. I promise I didn't use the sex as a way to cover up how I felt-"

"I wouldn't have cared if it was!" Jimin said, his voice shaking as his composure slipped. "Jungkook, I don't care if sex is what you needed to feel better - I care that you completely ghosted me after! No texts, no calls! Then today - today was bad, Jungkook. Today was mean."

"I - I know. I know." Jungkook reached for Jimin again and this time Jimin didn't maneuver away. Still, he was stiff as Jungkook placed his hands gently on Jimin's waist, begging for Jimin to look at him without those tears pooling from his eyes. It hurt even more that Jimin refused to acknowledge he was crying - his gaze was focused and frustrated as if of the tears were betraying him.

"I'm sorry about today, I should have been more present for you." Jungkook waited until Jimin looked him in the eyes, giving him a small nod before Jungkook continued. "I knew Namjoon was in Seoul with his wife - but actually seeing it? Seeing him with her in person? Happy? You of all people should know what it's like to face someone who's hurt you. It freezes everything, drills into you like poison."

Jimin frowned, stepping out of Jungkook's grasp.

"I should know how it feels? What - because of Seokjin?" Jimin huffed a disbelieving laugh.

Jungkook hesitated to nod. They were two sides of the same coin - weren't they?

"You know what Jungkook, fuck you." He said, shaking his head. Jimin was looking at Jungkook as if he didn't really know him. "You don't get to use Seokjin against me. I'm allowed to be upset by this."

"Jimin, I already apologized. What more do you want me to do?"

"Care, Jungkook. I don't want you to just say I'm sorry, I wanted you to care. To be here. Or at the very least, let me in on what was going on so that I didn't sit here all day waiting like an idiot!"

"If it were any other week, any other time, Jimin I wouldn't have been here in a heartbeat. I can't help the timing of it! You knew I had baggage too, we both knew this!"

Jimin stopped, spinning on his heel. "If Namjoon were to come into this room right now, if he were to tell you that he left his wife, that he made a mistake and that he wanted you back, would you take him up on it?"

Jungkook stuttered. "Jimin, I can't answer that. You of all people should know-"

Jimin nodded again, that small laugh leaving his throat again.

"Look Jungkook, I know that seeing someone who's hurt you is horrible. But when Seokjin literally walked onto our set back in LA and told me he wanted me back, that he was so sorry and that he would be better, I told him to go fuck himself."

Jimin ran a hand through his hair, taking in a small breath. "When he asked for me back, I said no, Jungkook. I didn't say it's complicated or that I had to think on it. So you don't get to come into my home and say that we're in the same place with the people who hurt us. Because we're just ... not."

"What are you saying, Jimin?" Jungkook asked, stumbling back.

Jimin bit at his lip, that frost thawing around his frame as he took in a small, shaky breath.

"I know it's selfish, Jungkook, but today was ... it was really important to me. I know how important getting closure over Namjoon is to you, I understand that you have trauma you're working through, I get it, I do, but I told you how last year Seokjin treated my birthday. I told you all week about how excited I was about this, about spending time with you. And then you do the same thing he did."

"I ran into his wife today, Jimin. I talked with her; she wants me to meet with Namjoon."

Jimin nodded, his eyes finally drying but they were still red. "You're not hearing me." He said, cheeks puffy and the tears had ruined his makeup. "I'm sorry. That must have been hard to run into her." Jimin finally added. "I wish I could give you more comfort on this Jungkook, but right now I just...can't."

Jimin's gaze softened and he finally reached for Jungkook, placing his small hand on Jungkook's forearm. His fingers felt warm, the touch sending an electric shiver down Jungkook's back. Jimin frowned, searching Jungkook's eyes through Jimin's thick lashes. He could smell Jimin's lavender perfume when he was so close and Jungkook felt like he was breathing fresh air for the first time.

Then, he felt like someone stabbed him. With Namjoon it always felt comfortable. Safe. But when Jimin held him so close he understood the difference between them as clearly as if someone had carved it onto him. Jimin felt like home. A home he'd ignored and made cry because he wasn't ready to truly move on.

Jungkook swallowed down the thought as if it was acid, burying it deep inside of him where nothing could ever reach.

Jungkook, in a different sort of Hell, got to watch Jimin make his next decision in real time. The thoughts flickering across his brow as if they were being painted. Jimin took a step back, the lavender scent trailing along with him.

"Look, I have a party to get to. I get it, I'm not trying to undermine your trauma or what you went through. It has to be crazy to run into your ex-fiancé's wife and it's clear that you still have a lot to work through - which is completely fair - but I'm not going to be dating you while you do it. I can't be someone's means to an end, not again."

Jungkook's entire world froze.

"Wait hold on, what? I stood with you throughout everything with Seokjin and when it's my turn you leave?"

Jimin looked like Jungkook had slapped him. "I wasn't in love with Seokjin still when we worked through that. You and I didn't have months of history between us either! I'm going to get you through this, my home is your home, but I can't do it as more than a friend. You have to decide where your heart is first."

Jimin paused, the tears pooling from his eyes even though he kept his composure together. His small hand reached Jungkook's cheek and he brushed it lovingly with his thumb.

"Please." Jungkook croaked out, "don't."

Jimin pulled his hand away and walking to the door. His hand lingered on the door, waiting for Jungkook, and when silent hit he gave a small, sad nod.

"You know how else I know this is the right thing to do?"

"How?" Jungkook asked, the anger and hurt loud in his throat. Jimin's face softened then, just as it did whenever he woke up in bed before Jungkook and got to catch the moment Jungkook woke up.

"Because even after all this, you still haven't wished me happy birthday."

_________

A/N
So remember when I started this fic and said it would just be happy and bright? Yea I think I've learned I'm a whore for the drama.

- Vio