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Jiddah's POV

Rebuilding trust when it's been broken is not dependent only on the person who has broken it, or how many times they can proove they are honest and are willing to make the relationship work again. It depends on the person who has decided not to trust again or go back to the relationship. No matter the effort Yusuf puts and the love and dedication he shows towards me it can't erase the memories of him I have or make me love him again, yes I once loved him but now I have no atom of feelings for him.

He keeps on trying, he still hasn't given up, he wants us to go back to been couples. He visited Aunty Aina'u twice in the village and brought food stuffs and beverages saying he missed Maryam and wanted to see her. He pleaded with Aunty Aina'u to ask me to pick his calls. I did when he called and he insisted to come and see me in school and now he's here. He has been talking for the past 20minutes while I just look at him and nod my head when necessary.

"I don't know what got into my head that I treated you the way I did, I'm very sorry, if there is anything more sorry than sorry I'll say it jiddah. I hurt you so bad I find myself hating myself for every minute of the day. I know I've hurt you badly and I'm ready to correct my mistakes, please just tell me what I need to do Jiddah. Jiddah I'm in love with you, if you can't come back to me the please tell me how do I live without you, because it seems almost impossible. By now you should have realized that I'm serious, it's been more than a year now but I'm still chasing you like a Dog, why Can't you have mercy on this soul and give him another chance" he said with teary eyes. Now I'm confused, if I continue listening to his words history might repeat it self.

"Yusuf why are you doing this to yourself. You can get a woman who is better than me in every aspect so why stuck yourself here forever. You don't have a place in my heart again please let's do our selves a favour and stay away from each other. All this won't help and please don't visit me or Maryam again" I said fiddling with the straw in my glass cup, yes we are in the school cafe.

"Jiddah I know you to be a kind hearted human being, why the sudden change?, Or is it because of that Lecturer?" He asked with a frown on his face. "Pardon?"

"Yes, the one you're dating" he said. "Are you serious right now?, Who are you talking about?" I asked. "That lecturer, the one that visit you in your hostel" he said.

Wow, just wow. He's referring to Farouq,Aunty Khadija's brother in-law. "Ohh so you've been stalking me all this while?" I asked. "Yes, I have someone spying on you. It's because I love you and I won't let any one stand in between us. It's me you've known for a long time Jiddah, please don't get distracted" he said.

"I'm not dating him, he only visited me twice. Wait why am I even explaining myself to you?, So what if I'm dating him, it's non of your concern is it?, Do you remember when you told me to go to hell and never step my foot into your house. It's not even about who you've known for a long time it's about who cares the most" I stated. "You're bringing up this issue again. Humans are bound to make mistakes in their lives Jiddah. To err is human to forgive is Divine. I'm going to give you enough time to think about what we've discussed today and I'm glad you're not dating him. You're not with any Man because you want me back Jiddah, can't you see it?" He chuckled.

"I'm not with any Man because I've lost interest in men. That gender have done a lot of damage in my life. I want to focus on studies and see what I can do for myself and my family. Marriage is not on my mind okay. So it's better you go back to your beautiful wife at home and stop disturbing me" I said.

"I regret choosing her over you wallahi. I don't know what came over me but whatever it is I'm sure I've learnt my lesson. Please tell me you'll think about it again" he pleaded. "Okay I will" I said not because I'm going to change my mind. "Can I go now?" I asked. "Yeah sure, let me walk you back to the hostel" he said.

"Never mind, I'm going to the library" I said. "okay, let me escort you then" he said. "No don't worry, besides you should get going it's almost 1:30 and you said you're following the afternoon train" I said. "Alright then" he caressed the back of his head. "Till we meet again. Thanks for today" he said.

"You're welcome, Bye" I said. "Bye" he tried to hug me but I pushed him back with my hand. "I'm Sorry" he chuckled. I nodded my head and left him standing there.

Has Yusuf really changed?, I kept asking myself this question through out the day.

Few Days Later

My phone started ringing again disturbing my peaceful sleep, I'm so very exhausted and need some rest, who is this caller for Godsake, I hissed and answered cause the caller won't just give up. "Hello" I said with a low tone.

"Hi, Jiddah" the caller replied. "Sorry hope I didn't wake you up, you sound like you just woke up from sleep" he said, sounds like Farouq's voice. "Yeah I was asleep" I said rubbing my eyes. "Alright then. I'll come back later kenan" he said and my eyes widened,just remembered we talked earlier on phone and he told me he's coming. "Wait, you're already here?" I asked checking the time, what?! I slept for good 4hours.

"Yes, I've been waiting for you since" he chuckled. "Oh my God I'm so sorry, I'll be out in a jiffy" I said and cut the call. I looked at my roommate who was fast asleep and laughed, someone that said she'll wake me up. I entered the Toilet and freshen up. I quickly wore my Hijab and went downstairs to meet him.

I looked around and spotted his car parked close to the mini market near our hostel. I stepped toward the car and knocked car window. "You're here" he said after stepping out of the car. "Yes" I said feeling a bit embarrassed, I kept hip waiting.

"Ina yini" I greeted him in hausa. "Lafia qalau, ya studies?" He asked leaning against his car. "Alhamdulillah, ya gida ya aiki" I asked. He was dressed in a light blue kaftan and a wanzam cap that perfectly suits him and bring out his charisma. Not to talk of his melanin skin that's always glowing, should I ask him his skin care? Cause Damn, I love the way he sparkles.

"Lafia qalau, it's not easy though, having to come here once every week hasn't been easy, and you know how things are now, you can't travel by road so I leave my car here and follow the train" he said with a sigh. "Eyaa Allah ya kyauta ya kawo mna karshen su" I prayed. "Ameen ya Rabbi. So how is studies, how are you coping with your new school?" He asked.

"Alhamdulillah, we are starting Test on Monday" I replied. "Masha Allah. All the best" he smiled. I love the way he smiles, I mean he smiles alot and looks at me in a different kind of way. "Uhm lest I forget. Aunty Khadija gave me something to bring to you" he opened his car and brought out a big cream color bag. "Okay. Thank you" I smiled.

"Jiddah I know we haven't known each other for a long time now but I...I want to talk to you about something important, well it's important to me but I don't know if I can proceed" he chuckled nervously, why the sudden anxiety Mr.?

"Can I?" He asked again. "Well Sir I don't know what it's about, but you can" I don't like where this is going though.

"Uhmm I..." And then he stopped and caressed his nape. "I like you" he blurted out making both of us uncomfortable. My heart rate increased and I felt butterflies in my stomach. "You..like me" I said my eyes almost falling out of their socket, to say I was shock is an understatement. "Well I've been trying to tell you but it just won't come out the way I want it to, I always end up saying something else"

"I know you haven't known me for a long time now and it won't be easy for you to accept what I've presented with. It started from the first day I saw you in Aunty Khadija's house, you have all I've been searching for in a woman. The calmness, manner intelligence, and beauty. You're every Man's Desire" he smiled. "I can't believe I'm saying this" he giggled.

"If you're not seeing anyone then please give me a chance to love you. In not asking that you love me back right away, just give me a chance to get to be your friend then you can decide afterwards and whatever your decision is I promise to respect it" he stated looking into my eyes.

He sounded as calm and sincere as ever, but come to think of it, what will a man do or say that will erase the bad image of them I have. I mentally shaked my head and smiled, if only he knows...

   "Uhmm..Okay we can become friends if that's what you want, but I can't promise you anything more than that gaskia" I said in low voice. "Okay Allah ya shige Mana gaba" he said and I nodded my head.

  "Soo, how is studies?" He asked, he looks nervous and that's Soo unlike him, he's not this way because of me right?

   "Alhamdulillah it's going well" I managed to smile. "Okay, All the best Dear. let me allow you to rest, your eyes are swollen you look tired, go get some rest, I'll take my leave now" he said. "Okay Thanks for the visit" I smiled. "Can I call you later in the evening?" He asked and I gave him a questioning look. "Well, just to exchange pleasanteries, we are friends ain't we?" He chortled. "Alright no problem" we said our goodbye and I went back to the hostel with his words running on my mind.

    I love his calmness and he talks in a mature way, what else am I expecting anyways, he looks 30+, yeah he's not a small boy...lol. That doesn't necessarily mean he'll love me or care for me, showing love has nothing to do with age, a young person can show love and affection more than an old person and also vice versa. Well, there is no cause for alarm, like he said, we are going to become friends, and we'll remain as friends also, I'm not changing my mind. Oh Men! They'll treat you like a Diamond during courtship and make you their waste bin when you enter their house. As for me, I'm done with that gender.

   "When did you wake up sef?" my roommate yawned and stretched her hands. "While you were asleep of course" I rolled my eyes. "Hahaha, so how did it go?" She asked. "What do you mean?" I eyed her. "This lecturer has visited you like 10 times now, something is fishy, the thing between the both of you is beyond what meets the eyes oo" she teased. "Kai Jamila, this is the 3rd time fah" I frowned my face.

   "So what did he bring for you?" She collected the bag and unzipped it. "It's just some clothes and yaji fah, and it's from Aunty Khadija " I laughed. "Ohh" she chuckled. I adjusted my sleeping position and closed my eyes but the sleep just won't come back. I sighed and brought out my handout to read.

•••••

I folded the last set of clothe and put it in my traveling bag, then packed my cosmetics and other stuffs like charger and ear piece and zipped the bag. Alhamdulillah we are done with our 2nd Semester Exams and we'll be going on a one week break before the commencement of a new session. 

  "This girl you're mean?" My roommate scowled.  "I know" I laughed. "It's just a one weeks break, I rather stay here than stress myself and besides the road is not good and my parents can't afford a flight ticket to Delta State in this recess" she sighed and nodded my head in agreement. "Toh Allah ya kawo Mana sauqi" I smiled and hugged her. "Help me and take the bag downstairs now" I grinned. "Okay, but it's because I'll miss you oo" she laughed and we exited the room and headed outside.

   "Ohh finally she's here" he sighed. "I'm sorry" I smiled. "It's fine, I'm used to it" he chuckled and collected the bag from Jamila after exchanged pleasantries. "Sir this girl has turned you to her Driver oo" Jamila eyed me. "It's fine, I'm always at her service" he chuckled and I stuck my tongue at her. "Okay oo safe journey, Ba-bye, I'll miss you small, well it's your food I'll miss shaa" she rolled her eyes. "Okay Bye" I laughed.

    We entered the car and left while I kept smiling like a fool, I can't wait to go home and see my Daughter, it's been three months already, I'm afraid she'll Forget me. "I'll be flying to Abuja next tomorrow insha Allah, and I'll be leaving for UK so I won't be able to take you back to school" he said, well why is he explaining his self, it's not like it's his duty to take me to school or bring me back home. "Okay, Allah ya kiyaye hanya" I smiled.

   "Har yanzu ana jamun aji ne ko?" He gave me a quick look, "Jan aji Kuma, what for?" I feigned ignorance. "Regarding us, our relationship" he said and parked the car by the road side. "I notice you've had past experience with Men, but believe me we are not all the same, there are still good men out there you should open your heart to. I love you, I love you Soo much, I've never felt this way towards a lady since the departure of my wife" he said and arched my brows. "Yes, but she's late now, she died from child brith five years ago" he said. "Allah sarki May her soul rest in peace" I really felt for him.

   "Jiddah wallhi I Love you and I'm ready to make you my wife. I'll be the happiest man in Earth if I get to wake up and see you beside me. We talked about this since the beginning of your 1st semester and now you're done with second semester. Have mercy on this soul mna" he pouted. "There are many things you don't know about me and if you do you'll loose respect for me and the love will fade away. Let's just stay as friends" I uttered. "Whatever it is that you're talking about, I believe it's your past life so I'm ready to accept it by the will of God. I love you more than your imagination and I want to introduce you to my family, My sister has been dying to see you, she wants to see the woman that Stole the heart of her brother" he giggled.

    "You've told them about me?" I asked surprised, "Yes of course, why not. I told them you don't like me but I'm head over hills for you" he chuckled and I just shaked my Head. "It's getting late fah" I gestured at the sky. "Okay, I guess that marks the end of the discussion" he said and ignited the car.

    He has shown me nothing but love, care and affection for the past few months we've known each other. He'll take me home when we have a break and checks up on my whenever he visit to the university for lectures. He gives me advices and words of encouragement when ever I'm down because of school stuffs. He has been a strong pillar indeed, but I'm scared I'll repeat the same mistake again. "Please tell me what to do so you can accept me and love me back?" He asked, "I don't know. It's not because I don't love you or that you're not good enough, I've been through a lot and I think it'll take time to heal" I said and he nodded his head, "As usual, that's what you always say" he smiled and continued driving and silence took over, we didn't talk to each other again through out the journey. He'll get mad at me but never show it and then come back to being the lover boy he is.

   "We've arrived" he sighed. "Alhamdulillah, thanks for the ride, I really appreciate it" I said he smiled. "I'm always at your service. It's my responsibility to do all this and beyond for you, just that you keep blocking some paths and stopping me" he stated. "It's not your responsibility fah, you're just helping me" I chuckled.

   "Uhmm, let's go inside then" he said and Carried my bag from the trunk. "Let me carry it" I said, "No, don't worry" he said and I nodded my head.

   "Assalamu Alaikum" we said at the same time. "Wa'alaikumu salam, Aunty Jiddah" Amira ran to us and hugged me. "Ameera" Faruq called her. "Uncle Faruq Good evening" she hugged him, "Evening Dear, how are you how's school?" He asked. "Alhamdulillah school is fine. Let me go inside and Call Umma, she's in the bedroom" she said, "Okay, Thank you" he said and she chuckled.

   "Let me get you a glass of water" I said and he nodded his head and sat down in the parlour.  I went to the bedroom first and greeted Aunty Khadija then brought him the water. "Thanks" he said after emptying the cup. "Should I get you more?" I asked, "No, don't stress yourself"
"Okay, let me go in and freshen up, will be back soon" I said after Aunty Khadija came in.
 
Later in the evening

   I went to Aunty Khadija's room after taking a short nap to greet her properly. "Jiddah kenan, do you know that Faruq talked to me about you again. I'm not going to Force you or insist that you love him, just give him a chance and if he fails you can have a reason to stay away from him, but I assure you he's a good man. I told him virtually everything about your past this evening when he insisted I let him know the reason why you don't want to be with a man again" she stated in a soft tone.

   "And what did he say?" I asked shocked "He said he's okay with it, and he'll take Maryam as his Daughter" she said, "That's what Yusuf said too Aunty Khadija" I shaked my head. "Jiddah please give him a chance kinji. Wllhi ya dameni akan maganan nan, and his mother called me about this issue too" she held my hands. "I know what you've been through so I won't let you fall into the wrong hands again,okay"

  "Okay" I said though I still have a huge doubt in mind. The rest of the conversation was held with my mind else where cause I don't want to be fall a victim or domestic violence again and again, I've heard enough. "Aunty Khadija let me go back to my room" I said, "Okay, Goodnight."

  I went back to my room and retired to bed with Faruq on my mind.
 
••••••••

You must have noticed changes in the sequence of the chapters, I merged some short chapters together so we are in chapter 35 now. I changed the new character's name to Faruq, it was Ahmad initially.

  So what's your opinion regarding how this book is going.... I'll be in the comment section.

  I'll complete the book this December insha Allah😊☺️