Taylor

I promised myself I wouldn't look for him, but my eyes swept across the sea of students looking for him anyway. The need to catch a glimpse of him was stronger than my anger.

After I'd switched my phone back on, I had countless voicemails from my brother, but I was still too angry to even consider talking to him. He needed to realize that he couldn't control my life anymore and I felt if I gave in too easily he wouldn't learn. He'd called every couple of hours and got updates from Matthew.

I hadn't received any voicemails or messages from Sin and despite how angry I was I felt disappointed that he hadn't tried to contact me. Jordan's words kept echoing in my mind. Maybe he did it because he cares about you.

I'd been so angry when I'd discovered he'd found out my past. I'd been so confused with betrayal that I hadn't even considered that maybe he'd done it because he cared. I considered the thought. But if he cared so much, why hadn't he tried to contact me?

"You're thinking too hard," Matthew said, pulling me out of my deep thoughts. I glanced at him and he arched an eyebrow at me.

"I can smell roasted peanuts," he added with a teasing smile and I couldn't help but smile back.

"Really funny," I threw back at him as I shook my head.

Matthew had a way of easing stressful situations with his jokes and easy-going attitude. I really liked having him around.

He'd even promised Jordan he'd get us ice cream so we could eat ourselves into a sugar frenzy to forget about our heartache. I still didn't see how sugar was going to help, but I was going to try anyway.

It scared me that I'd gotten so attached to Sin in such a short space of time. He was such an intense person and the feelings I had for him matched that intensity. When I thought about him not being around, I felt short of breath like my lungs didn't have enough air to breathe.

I never caught a glimpse of Sin for the entire day and by the time Matthew and I were walking back to the apartment, I was feeling deflated. On the way home we stopped by the shop and Matthew bought two tubs of ice cream. Apparently the one was for me and the other was for Jordan.

"That is way too much ice cream," I told him as we left the shop.

"I've seen heartbroken girls eat way more ice cream than this," he informed me with a teasing smile. I still wasn't convinced that ice cream was going to ease the hole that had settled in my chest.

A little later that evening, Jordan and I were sitting side by side on the couch covered in blankets each with a tub of ice cream and a spoon. Somehow the sugar was making me feel a little better. Jordan seemed as heartbroken as I was, and she was staring unseeing at the TV like her mind was somewhere else. I set the ice cream down on the table, unable to eat any more.

"You feeling better?" Matthew asked from the single chair to the side of us.

"A little," I replied. He was like a big brother doing his best to try and mend our broken hearts.

"Why are you so good at this?" I had to ask. Most guys wouldn't have a clue.

He smiled.

"I have two younger sisters," he revealed. Then I understood how he slipped into the big brother role so easily, he was a big brother to two sisters. It made so much more sense.

"I'm going to go and get ready for bed," I said. Matthew gave me a smile and I glanced to Jordan who gave me a weak smile.

I went into my bedroom and closed the door. I leaned against it for a moment and let out a sigh. This whole heartbreak thing sucked and I hated the feeling that my heart was missing and in its place was an empty hole. It was like an ache where my heart should be. I walked over to my dresser and checked my phone. There was that feeling of disappointment that Sin had still not tried to contact me. He'd said it wasn't finished, but I couldn't help feeling that he'd given up on me.

Could I blame him? The answer was no. I hadn't given him a chance to explain anything, I'd just told him to leave. I put my phone back down and went into the bathroom. In the shower I let some of my sadness spill out in tears that streamed down with the water. I was feeling emotionally exhausted by the time I got out of the shower and got dressed.

My phone beeped. I'd received a message. Subconsciously I held my breath as I walked over to pick up my phone. I was so used to the feeling of disappointment that I was momentarily shocked that it was a message from Sin.

I'm sorry.

Two simple words that gave me hope. For several moments I took the words in and then they spurred me into action. I got dressed as fast as I could and shoved my phone into my jeans. Matthew was still watching the girlie movie in the living room with Jordan who was still trying to get to the bottom of the tub of ice cream.

"I need to go," I said to him.

"You're not going anywhere without me," he told me as he stood up. "Can't it wait till tomorrow?"

I shook my head. I'd wasted enough time and I wasn't going to waste any more. My decision was made and I just hoped that I wasn't too late.

"Will you be okay here on your own?" I asked Jordan.

"I'll be fine. I have enough ice cream and I have TV," she said, trying to make light of her heartbreak.

"So where are we off to?" Matthew asked as we walked to the car.

"I need to talk to Sin," I said as he opened the passenger side for me. He studied me for a moment before he shrugged.

"Okay."

Maybe it was the determined look that told him there was no talking me out of what I'd set out to do. I knew how precious life was and wasting any time was wrong.

Nervously, I fidgeted as Matthew made the short trip to Sin's house. I didn't ask how he knew where Sin lived. I assumed my brother had given him the same folder he'd given me on Sin. I was unsure of how Sin was going to react to my sudden visit and I felt the nervous knot in my stomach twist as I got out of the car. Matthew got out of the driver's side.

"No," I said to him as firmly as I could. "I need to do this without you."

"It's my job to keep you safe," he reminded me in a serious tone.

"I'll be safe with Sin," I assured him. "I will call you if I need you."

He looked to the house and then back to me.

"No," he stated. "I can't stay out here while you go inside."

We had a stare down for a few seconds before I threw my hands up in the air in frustration.

"Fine," I bit out.

I needed to talk to Sin, but I was scared that he would close up if he saw Matthew. I had no choice. Matthew followed me up the stairs and he stood beside me as I rang the doorbell.

I bit my lip as I felt the nervous knot in my stomach tighten at Sin's reaction to seeing me and Matthew. His reaction to Matthew when he'd seen him in the apartment hadn't been good and I had a feeling he wouldn't react well to seeing him with me now. I just hoped he would let me explain who Matthew was and why he had to go where I went.

I heard some noise behind the door and then the door opened.