Chapter 34 - Talk Down (Kalenah POV)

Sometimes – hell- No not sometimes. Most often the right next move is not always the easiest move. But I should also be known and accepted that no one is perfect.

'Show me a soul with no dents and perfect and you'll find a person with a life not lived.' That was my belief. In turn I did not want the most well behaved rule following mindless child.

Although at the opposite end of the spectrum, my belief was troublesome and complicated.

I couldn't raise children that believed that rules do not apply to them, or worse, that they could hand pick which rules or laws to follow. With so much to do in the world, I've never understood how many get caught doing illegal acts.

Questioning whether there was a moment when they looked at what they were doing, and thought 'this is wrong.'

Not just immoral, or thinking that it was. But was there a conscious thought where they said 'I know I shouldn't be doing this highly dishonest thing?'

They must have.

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"I found her snooping around Faith's computer-"

"What!?"

Angela, Ansel's little sister nods, eyes wide, "and she said that she was turning in an assignment for Faith-" I snorted dismissively.

"No... never," I shake my head just debunking whatever Taylor told Angela. I couldn't fathom what was happening with Taylor, Samson and Faith.

It made no sense.

I understood that Taylor and Samson are – were friends. However what I do not and cannot wrap my mind around is this aggressive obsessive nature that has manifested.

Then again, I could also see where or how this erratic behavior from Taylor was coming from. Taylor thought that Samson and her getting together was just a foregone conclusion. In Taylor's mind, Samson and her getting together was as confirmed as the sky is blue and the grass is green.

Samson turning her down could be more disappointing than it should be because in her mind, they were meant to be together.

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It was late, nearly 10 at night and no one had left the house, even the Romas' had remained in our house, which made it tight fitting but we had the bottom basement barracks for exactly this type of situation. We were a hunted bunch, with the bridge blowing up, the fire that nearly killed Talia... staying in this home - together - was the best plan we had at the moment.

"It doesn't make any sense," I shook my head as my mother and father as well as the Rosario's and Ansel's parents sat at the table in the kitchen. "If - I mean I'm glad you're okay Shannon, happy you weren't injured beyond repair but this was just - they could've waited until two cars were on that bridge... that would've had maximum-"

Bess - my mother - shakes her head, "That fire wasn't an accident and this - this wasn't either," my father interjects, the water boiling I set out to make us all a warm drink my mind playing over the day. Thankfully the twins birthday wasn't ruined, no one had gotten seriously injured I thought my hands moving knowing without me really having to pay attention to what was being said until - "It's not quite hard to see that the common denominator in this situation is Faith," Shannon said pitifully.

"First the dorms, now here..." carrying the tray to the table everyone preparing their drink to their preference, my mother and the others remained silent almost as though they hadn't heard her comment. "You didn't tell us she had such talent," my mother gushed after a moment though and I'm picturing the smile on Amy's face when she was opening her gift from Faith.

"Well with missionaries for parents, I'm sure she had to learn to make her own clothes while her parents were too busy to buy the child clothes," Shannon shook her head but I could feel my fathers eyes on me. I sat there a grown woman, but I could still feel the heat of his stare, but I knew it was only a matter of time that Ansel's and mine parents spoke with us privately. He knew though - my father... probably my mother as well since they held or kept no secrets between them - as did Jonah that Cynthia was in fact Faith's mother.

The four now knew that there were no missionary parents, that Faith was on her own, they now knew that she had grown up in a house on a mountain alone, believing like we did the sky was blue or the grass was green that the air was poisonous.

My mother now knew that Faith hadn't pulled away because she was wary of knew people, it was because she had spent who knows how long of her short life in comparison to my mother, trained and almost hypnotized to believe only the worst in people.

"Did you know she was making Amy the dress?" Ansel asks knowing that I did sometimes help Faith tidy her room, but not like the other kids. Faith was independent, she kept that room so clean that you'd believe she was only visiting, not that it was her room, a place to call her own.

Sure she hid out in that room but she sure did not claim the room.

"No... I mean I thought she'd buy them something - I had told her that she shouldn't spend much but that dress-"

"And to make one for Sami!" my mother gushed, "We had dresses like that in my day... wearing them to balls..." I know in her head she's daydreaming of times nearly two hundred years back. I nodded, remembering some of the picture paintings that I had seen.

"I'd hope that those dresses were sewn better," Shannon snorted as she sipped her coffee, the hostility in her tone much more apparent.

"She probably had to rush since Amy wanted one for Sami too," I shrugged away the minor mistakes or whatever Shannon was speaking about, "Amy said that it was right away the Halloween party that she asked so that doesn't leave much time to make something perfect - not that Amy cared," I laughed, "she had begged us for a big girl bike," Ansel nodded laughing.

"Now... her tunes changed, 'Daddy I can't wear my princess dress on a bicycle!' the outrage," Ansel chortled the others joining in. Shannon was right, it wasn't perfect, and I know had Faith had more time she would have tried to aim for that but I also know that making two dresses in such a short time couldn't have been easy. But it's more than even just that she made two pretty dresses for the girls, it's that she felt the need to actually bother with that in the first place. It would've been much easier to find two dresses and gift Amy those.

Then there was my little Amy.

She couldn't keep a secret. Not just her, I'm not sure any five year old could keep a secret, but she had for nearly a month. I had never once heard her mention asking Faith to make them; sure she went up there to make bracelets, but by her mini speech I suspect that it wasn't a fleeting moment - less than a minute conversation.

Amy claimed Faith had taken her numbers - which I knew was her measurements - so that took some time too. Yet... nothing. She went to school talking about her bracelets but never uttered a single word about the dress.

"What are you guys talking about?" the question bringing me back to the conversation. Looking up I give a small smile to Macy, Ansel's youngest sister. Being physically mated to Kenneth - his dominant eye color a dark emerald, Macy's had changed from the Conrad blue to Kenneth's green. "Oh just about that dress Faith made for the girls," Shannon chirped with an eye-roll, which Macy didn't seem to take in as her eyes danced with excitement.

"Oh - yeah had she not gotten ill I wanted to speak with her about making three of them for the girls - Masha and Rosa are out of their mind with jealously - Kenneth and I can't afford to buy each girl some nearly three hundred dollar dress just for playing pretend but I had asked Faith how much it cost to buy the supplies - just sixty and that's even more than she really spent," Macy pulled a chair out.

"She spoke to you?" I asked the words out before I could reign myself in.

Macy cocked her head at me, "Of course why wouldn't she?" I just shrug and thankfully she lets it go, "But yeah, I asked just curious when Rosa, Marsha and Holly all whined to try the dresses on after the pool time - and Faith said she hadn't made anything like that before, but Amy saw her supplies on the bed and basically asked for what she wanted on the dress and forty days later," I nodded.

"She has quite the talent, with more practice she could turn that into a pretty nice small income." With what Walsh said Dmitri left Faith... she'd never need it, I thought privately, but Macy and the others didn't know that. Although I could see where Macy was going with this, Ansel's family didn't have the type of financial cushion that mine did. To them, using their talents and abilities to make money, while remaining hidden was how they maintained and supported their families. If Faith honed that talent there was no telling how well she could do, as Macy said.

Coming down the steps, Samson nodded to those seated at the table, reaching for two mugs, and not wanting to keep attention on his actions - which I knew was making two cups of tea for Faith and himself, and he would probably be taking them to her room - "How are things up in Portland?" I directed the question to Shannon the conversation going, evolving for nearly forty minutes. I knew she and Javier were having a hard time, traveling back and forth to Portland and Eugene; also with Devin, Taylor and Javier here in Bend.

"You came all the way up here to find me Taylor? Speak!" my son shouts, his voice sounding unhinged.

"When she goes back where she came from or wherever? You think I'll want you? What is your problem? How many ways do I have to say I don't want you? I have so little interest in you as anything Taylor!" He's not letting up and there's a moment of silence until "Mom! Dad!" I hear Samson roar calling for his father and I.

We get to the top of the house - the third floor - and find Faith with wide eyes, but my attention quickly goes to Samson, his face red, his eyes red rimmed, and he's shaking more than when he was having his first shift. When Shannon and Javier Senior come up right behind us, they're each gazing at Samson with what I believe are identical - to Ansel, Faith and I - expressions on their face.

Although I quickly calculate that we only just heard the last part of this conversation as Samson seems to fall apart as he roars, our other kids in the room on the third floor come to stand at the door, none coming out exactly, but after one sharp look they back away and close the door completely.

"God stop dad! I just wanted to talk to Fatima tell her how I felt - how - how it was all my fault with Silas, but Taylor is just always there - " his arms are flying around, his head shaking, "I can't get away from her-" He points at a silently crying Taylor, "- she's at school following me around, mopping, begging me to give her a chance - wanting to change for me - trying to show up to a party naked-" he whirls around to Taylor again, "I just want you to leave me alone Taylor!"

Before Samson can rant any longer, Javier Senior snaps at his daughter, pointing down the stairs and when I try to speak with Samson, he just - my boy looks so defeated, his shoulders hunched over, he can't even look at me, or his father.

And in the moment I hate my situation the most, I'm mom and therapist. His words disarm me, the weight of his words is shown right on his body, and I know he's in pain. The mom in me, knows he needs to talk, the therapist in me knows it's been two years of him walking around with his emotions bottled inside. Then it's a war, between sides, it hits me swiftly, and I may want him to talk, to me. But he's had two years of that and never took me up on that other, but he said himself, he just wanted to speak with Fatima. Not hide behind her issues; he wanted to speak with her.

I take Ansel by the bicep and lead him down the stairs, and though I'm the one that pulls him down the stairs, I'm still the one that needs his support.

"Naked Taylor? Naked?!" Javier Senior chastises his daughter. "Stay away from him - I've known Samson since he was a baby - what I just saw - stay away from him, if you can't stay away from him, then-"

"Dad I love him," she whispers and I'm unable to move my feet any further, I wanted to give them their privacy to handle her but the image of Samson just minutes ago still fresh on my mind.

"He doesn't love you," the words are cold and Shannon gasps.

"Kalenah-" I shake my head at her, "No - it's been six weeks, he told her nearly three months ago point blank that he has no interest in her romantically," Javier Senior's face is almost comical. Almost.

"Stay away from him, if you can't handle that on your own for the next month, after Christmas break you'll be moving back to Portland with your mother and I. Why are you - if Samson has said how he felt why are you still pushing this six weeks later Taylor?"

Javier looks away down the hall, "did you think about your actions and how they would hurt your sister and brother? Is - is that why Brennan and Devin split up?" Javier looked up directly at me.

"Indirectly-"

"That's-"

"Taylor..." I shake my head, facing my long time friends instead, "As her parents, if you cannot keep Taylor away from Samson, I'll get him a restraining order-"

"Now," Shannon lifts a palm at me, "That's going a bit far, don't you think-"

"He's told her since Faith has moved in that he's not interested in her romantically. Yet at every turn, here and at school she's been after him. Getting angry and making trouble between everyone-"

"But a restraining order – she wouldn't even be able to finish at the school – how would that work for her?"

"Does Taylor even care about school?"

"Of course she does," Shannon and Javier both answer, "She was in Faith's room emailing an instructor for the two of them when Ansel's sister accosted her," Shannon defends and I just blink.

What in gods name is that girl up to?

"Is that what Taylor told you?" I ask sardonically, but did I want to lay both Javier and Shannon out and straighten them right up. Devin was hacking into our system, a trap had already been set, I couldn't ruin what Angela and Ansel had put in motion.

It was a waiting game.

Yet at the same time, I wanted to protect Samson. His words are on repeat in my mind. I didn't misunderstand him and he didn't over speak. He feels as though Silas' death is directly his fault.

He's not in a good place.

Faith isn't in a good place.

And those two become my truer focus. The only way to help them – help Samson is to give him space to work out his feelings. He can never do that if Taylor is trying to jump him at every turn. All she's doing is fueling his anger.

With fear in my heart and thoughts, "Taylor and Faith work together on nothing. There is no assignment in which Faith would need Taylor to hand it in for her Shannon. So all that shows is that Taylor is lying to both of you. She had no business on that third floor, and she knows it." I gaze pointedly at Taylor herself while also reminding myself to keep my words in check.

In the minor lull. "Bottom line, keep Taylor away from Samson and Faith or I will get a restraining order against-"

And again it's like the girl doesn't know when to quit, "No! Samson loves me too - he treated me just like Brennan treated Devin, like Javier treats Talia... we always hung out, went out on dates, and - and then Faith came and mom you even said he loved me too that I should just give him time - but I did that and now - now he doesn't see his love for me. He just - he thinks that Faith is Silas - they are similar and he wants her because she reminds him of Silas-" my heart stops as though forgetting its function.

Faith reminded Samson of Silas. Though I'd heard this all before, it still touched me. Still wrecked me inside.

"Stop! Stop - just stop Taylor - Stop talking!" Javier Senior exclaims his eyes filled with shock, as I'm sure mine are. Shannon with her hand on her mouth - her eyes watery - glances up to meet my eyes, but I just walk away Ansel following me.

When we go to the study, I find my parents already there with Ansel's, accusation in their eyes, "Why didn't you tell us?" a grown adult for a moment I wonder if I should play dumb? Too tired to even put on a show I go sit, Ansel follows.

I sigh, "Faith didn't - doesn't want anyone to know that she lived that way - she doesn't think people will understand that she was a child and easily controlled, she's adjusted well but there are setbacks..." my mother nods sadly.

"Cynthia - Dannys' Cynthia - is her mother?" Jonah asks.

Ansel nods, "Yeah, she and Faith were together, that story about being on the run the minute she was here is a lie... she was with Faith and left her but she took Andy."

Both set of fathers nod, "She was loopy and Samson told us what he knew - well not everything he's very loyal to Faith," my father said but there was something in his tone and Jonah nodded as well.

"What?"

They glance at one another, "It's a set of things but the first thing is that you need to be aware that she's half Fae, if Samson and Faith are mates, he's going to do anything to protect her, his instincts to protect what's his... that beast inside... he will give up anything to keep her safe if he feels she isn't safe Kalenah," my father says and it all sinks in piece by piece.

Samson would leave if Faith was going to leave... he would give us up to follow her - protect her.

His behavior upstairs falls into place as well, "After this weekend she can't come here anymore - I can't take it! This whole time she's been here she's acted like some kind of stalker, and now she came up here to accost Fatima!"

"She can hear him, they're connected Kalenah," dad continues but all of what he says is true, it's not that they are "mates" like werewolves, but the truth is that there is a bond stronger than that of a human match or werejaguars.

"I don't - mom - I just wanted to talk to Fatima, that's all I wanted..." his words play on repeat in my mind until Ansel realizes I'm not paying attention and bids our parents goodnight, the two of us heading back to our room.

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