"I did it," I said as I barged into Gyan's apartment, and he closed the door with my entrance. "I can't believe it, but I fucking did it."

        I was grinning like the Cheshire Cat and just remembering what happened a couple days ago made my heartbeat go up again.

        "And what exactly did you do?" Gyan asked as he approached me with his arms crossed.

        "I came out," I said, and his brows knitted together. "I came out to my mom and sisters."

        My mother cried. My sisters were shocked, but they accepted it. My mother told me she loved me no matter what, but there were still tears in her eyes even as I left.

        This changed everything, but I didn't regret it. With each chain I unleashed, I felt more liberated. Change always came with freedom.

        "Oh." He walked past me, and my grin died down.

        "Oh?" I turned, and we faced each other. My expression was of confusion while his was of boredom. "Did you not hear me? I came out to my family, with the exception of my dad, and all you have to say is 'oh?'"

        "What do you want me to say?" He uncrossed his arms to jut them out at me. "When you said you did it, I thought you confessed your love to Kenji or something interesting."

        Something interesting?

        Well, I was sorry that coming out to my family wasn't interesting enough for him.

        Kenji was the first person who came to mind when I decided to tell someone, but he and I weren't exactly in speaking terms, so Gyan was the next best bet.

        I didn't know it was going to be a mistake.

        Gyan sighed and stepped forward. "I'm sorry, Darian." He rubbed his hands up and down my arms. "I just don't like talking about mood killers."

        "Mood killers?" I removed myself from his grasp as I studied him. "You're not out to your family, are you?"

        He shrugged. "Parents don't have to know everything about their kids."

        "Being gay is a huge part of a person's identity, Gyan," I said. "Every parent has a right to know that aspect of their child—eventually."

        I said this, but I dreaded the day my dad would have to find out about my sexuality. It wasn't going to be a good day—for either one of us.

        "I call 'bullshit,'" he said with his nose wrinkled. "Kids keep a lot of things from their parents, for everyone's sake. This is no different." It was different. "They don't have to know shit. Sometimes it's better for your family to believe what they want to believe."

        "Will that make you happy though?"

        I was scared to expose that part of myself to my family, but letting them in on that aspect of myself gave me a sense of happiness I didn't even know I lacked.

        Gyan smiled. "I don't actively find reasons to be unhappy."

        I rose a brow, not buying it. "Gyan—"

        "Shhhh." He pressed a finger to lips, and I took multiple steps back, and he followed. "Enough serious talk." My back pressed against the door as he leaned towards me with his scrutiny on my lips. "We don't do 'serious,' remember?" He planted kisses from my jaw down to my neck, and my eyes shut with his descend. "We have fun," he mumbled against my flesh, and I groaned. "We have fun until you grow the balls to go after the guy you really want."

        He nibbled on my neck, but my eyes opened wide.

        This didn't feel right.

        Even as one of Gyan's hands trailed down to tug on the hem of my shirt while the other groped my crotch, it felt wrong.

        It was going to be fun. It was going to be pleasurable. It was going to be laidback.

        But it still wasn't going to be right.

        I grabbed his hands and pushed him back. Gyan frowned. "What's wrong?"

        "I don't know if I want to hook up right now." We held eye contact as I spoke. "I kind of just wanna talk. About my coming out. About my day. About the many stressors in my life. I wanna talk about anything and everything."

        Sex was great, but it wasn't enough.

        I sounded like a fucking sap, but for the first time, I wasn't disgusted with myself.

        Gyan shook his head with a smirk on his lips. "I'm sorry, Darian, but I'm not the guy for that."

        I watched him for a second, not uttering a word as it dawned on me.

        He wasn't the guy at all.

        Neither was Eduardo Chavez, who I hooked up with sophomore year.

        Neither were all the one-night-stands or casual hookups I engaged in throughout high school.

        "You're right," I said with a nod. "You're not."

        I wanted to move on because Kenji was who I had always wanted, and I thought I was missing out, but I wasn't. I always knew what I wanted, and that was Kenji. No one else could change that, not even Gyan.

        Kenji could suck me off, just like everyone else. But he could also talk to me. He could make me feel unstoppable. He could make me feel like a good person. He could make me feel like the real Darian Ansel.

        Kenji was the whole package, but Gyan was only the box. It looked good from the outside and created anticipation for what was to come, but as soon as I opened it, nothing was there.

        Just an emptiness.

        It was time I went after that whole package, despite the consequences the contents of the box held.

        "I can't do this." I tousled my hair with both hands, and Gyan raised his hands in surrender. "I have to go."

        I opened the door and was halfway out when Gyan shouted, "Darian!" I stopped, and he smiled. "You're going to Kenji, aren't you?" I didn't say a word. "Go. I don't compete for my men." His smile morphed into a smirk. "Plus, I have a feeling with Kenji, I'll only lose, and what's the fun in that?"

        I rolled my eyes, and he chuckled.

        Gyan was a mess.

        Unfortunately, he wasn't the mess I was willing to put up with in the long run.

        Gyan stared at me with a sad smile and said, "Go get your seven-year crush."

        He didn't have to tell me twice. I was out the door and jogging towards my GMC in a heartbeat. I didn't care if I didn't deserve Kenji. I didn't care if he was pissed at me, and I didn't care about our past.

        All I cared about was my present with him.

"About time you brought your sorry-behind here." Honoka glared at me as I stood in their doorway.

         "Nice to see you, too, Honoka." I walked in and removed my shoes, but she continued to eye me.

        "What the hell's wrong with you two?" she asked with both hands planted on her hips.

        "What did we do?" I played dumb, but Honoka wasn't having it.

        "First, Clay and Alissa," she said, listing off with her fingers. "Now, you and Kenji. Why does everyone make everything so damn complicated?"

        I sent her a funny look. "Because we're complicated people?"

        "What's not complicated is the fact that you and Kenji like each other," she said, and hearing those words made me grin.

        I couldn't get over the fact that he liked me. I had wanted that since sixth grade.

        "Are you listening to me?" Honoka snapped her fingers in my face, reclaiming my attention, and I nodded. "Good because everyone needs to stop making everything so difficult and start getting their emotions in check. This isn't a damn high school drama."

        My eyes went round as Honoka glared past me as if I just tried her life or something. "Y-you okay, Honoka?"

        She released a drawn-out breath with her hands running down her face. "No. I'm frustrated." Her shoulders sagged, and her glare diminished into a slight pout. "I'm tired, and I'm confused. Kenji's been really difficult to be around lately, and all this shit happening with you isn't making it any easier."

        It was my turn to frown. I knew I hurt him...again. I knew he had been frustrated and overwhelmed lately, but I didn't get a good vibe from this.

        "What's up?" My interest was piqued.

        "Kenji barely talks to me," she said, "and when he does, he snaps at me. I guess I should be grateful that he talks to me at all. He never wants to hang out with Clay and Alissa anymore. He barely talks to our father, and he never wants to leave his room, yet alone the apartment." My brows furrowed together. "He barely eats, or do anything else now. It's like I'm living with a zombie, or the very least, half of a person."

        This wasn't good. Isolation. Lack of appetite. Not partaking in activities that once interest him. Not being himself. This was bad news, especially with Kenji's past.

        Without another word, I walked past Honoka and headed for Kenji's room. "Darian!" Honoka shouted as she sped-walk behind me. "What are you doing?"

        I peeked back at her. "Un-complicating things."

        "Darian—"

        I had already opened the door to Kenji's bedroom, and my eyes widened at the darkness engulfing the room. Honoka stopped behind me as the two of us stepped inside. I could barely make out a single body lying on the bed with his back facing us, but he didn't even flinch at my sudden presence.

        "Kenji?" I took a step forward, and he stirred. "Kenji, it's me."

        "Go away," he croaked with his back continuing to face us.

        He wasn't getting rid of me that easily.

        "It's me. Darian."

        "Go away," he repeated, louder now.

        I looked over to Honoka, who sent me an apologetic smile.

        "Kenji—"

        "Leave!" he yelled. "I just wanna be alone. Leave me alone." His voice was barely audible at the end, and it didn't sound like Kenji.

        Fuck what he wanted.

        With newfound determination, I marched across his room, grabbed a hold of his curtains and pulled them back.

        "What the fuck?!" Kenji hollered as he sat up with his eyes squinted.

        I pulled the curtains back as far as they could go and turned to face the boy glaring daggers at me. His hair was disheveled and his skin was paler than usual. He wore sweatpants and a baggy, white shirt.

        I never saw Kenji for a sweatpants sort of guy.

        "I don't care if you want me to leave," I said as we stared at each other. "I'm not going anywhere, and I'm done leaving you behind."

        He narrowed his eyes at me, but I refused to break his stare.

        I was done hiding from Kenji and my feelings for him. It was time to face them both, like a man. It was time to be the man I deserved to be and the man Kenji deserved to be with.

        "I'll leave you two to talk," Honoka announced before closing the door with her exit.

        Kenji's gaze never left mine, and I remained silent until he broke it.

        "Why're you here, Darian?" he finally said with his expression easing up.

        "Why are you in bed when it's past five?" I walked around his bed at a leisurely pace. "Why do you look like that?" I motioned at the way he was dressed. Kenji Kai didn't wear baggy shirts and sweatpants when it was past morning. "Why are you isolating yourself? There're a lot of questions to be asked, Kenji."

        "Why do you give a damn?" he snarled.

        I stopped beside him and held his gaze as I said, "Because I give a damn about you."

        He averted his gaze and fumbled with his fingers. "What about Gyan?"

        "Gyan doesn't affect us," I said with a nonchalant shrug.

        "There is no 'us,'" he reminded.

        "You made that very clear, Kenji," I said.

         "I broke up with Rosalyn." My eyes almost popped out of their sockets as the news sunk in. "We broke up more than a week ago."

        "Why am I finding out now?"

        If I knew this shit, I wouldn't have even contemplated "moving on." Gyan would have been a non-factor.

        "Rosalyn and I were over," he went on, "when I walked in on you and that man."

        I was tempted to inform him that "that man's" name was "Gyan," but I bit my tongue. "How was I supposed to know that, Kenji?"

         "You told me you didn't want to be with me."

        "I was trying to put you first, for once." I knelt beside him and grabbed his hand in both of mine.

        "How?!" he yelled with confusion edging his features. "How is you telling me you don't wanna be with me anymore putting me first? How is fucking some guy putting me first? How does logic process through your mind, Darian?"

        Okay, that stung.

        "You're being mean," I said.

        Kenji wasn't mean.

        "You're always mean," he bit out. "You're especially mean to me, and I keep coming back for more."

        That really stung.

        "That's what I'm trying to work on." I held his hand a little tighter. "I don't wanna be that guy anymore that's mean to you and keeps hurting you. I wanna be good, Kenji. Even good for you."

        If I didn't like the guy I was to Kenji, it was time I did something about it, instead of accepting it.

        "I broke up with Rosalyn," he repeated with his eyes moistening. "I broke my rock."

        I brought his hand to my lips and planted a long kiss on it as I looked up at him. "Let me be your new rock. Let me be the rock I never was before."

        "I don't know if I'm good for you," he confessed as genuine fear crossed his face. "I don't know if I'm good for anyone."

        Kenji was confident, but the boy before me was broken, leaving an unsettling feeling in me.

        "I don't know if I'm good for you either," I said, and he wrapped his free hand over mine. "But there's only one way to find out." He leaned in and rested his forehead against mine. "We'll find out together."

        "I hate you," he muttered with his eyes closed. "At least, I should."

        I chuckled. "But you don't."

        "But I don't." He opened his eyes, and we watched each other in silence.

        He broke up with Rosalyn.

        Gyan wasn't a factor anymore.

        Nothing was standing in our way. Nothing but each other.

        "Come on." I released him and stood up as he watched me. "Get up." I pulled him out of bed, despite his groaning. "Go take a shower."

        "Darian," he groaned as he stood to his feet. "I already did."

        And he looked like that?

        This wasn't okay.

        "Take another one." I pushed him in the direction of the door. "You need to re-awaken your pores. No more being a zombie."

        He halted and glared back at me. "Who barges into someone's room and makes demands like this?"

        "Me," I answered. "Now, go. I'll be waiting here."

        I opened the door and pushed him out of it, and he didn't fight me. As the door closed behind him, I smiled, resisting the urge to fist-pump in glee.

        Kenji and Rosalyn broke up.

        The elation coursing through me was more intense than the one from the first time they broke up, and I flopped back onto his bed. I rested my hands behind my head as I stared up at the ceiling.

        Was this what it felt like to steal someone's boyfriend?

        I kind of liked it.

        Hell yeah, I would never be a saint.

        I laid back with my eyes closed and a smile on my lips. I didn't know how many minutes passed, but as soon as the door opened, I sat up straight and took in the boy before.

        A towel hung loosely around his hips as water dripped down his torso and coated his hair. He stared at me with his pink lips appearing softer than usual, probably from the water.

        "H-hey." I placed my feet on the ground with my gaze on him as he walked over to me. "Want me to leave?" He only watched me without replying. "I can give you privacy if you want. I can go and when you're done changing, you can call me—"

         He dropped his towel.

        It laid around his legs, and I gulped at his now nude body in front of me. "It's not like you haven't seen everything already."

        Kenji moved closer to me, and I could touch him if I stretched my arms out. It was a feat to keep my stare from descending.

        "You can look, Darian," he said, and I peered up at him for confirmation before glancing down at his flaccid shaft.

        Soft. Hard. I wanted it either way, and I wasn't even embarrassed by my thirstiness.

        I reached for him, but he grabbed my hand, stopping me. "You can look," he repeated with a smirk forming on the corner of his lips. "But no touching."

        He threw my hand back at me and turned around for his drawer. I watched like some bitch in heat as he bent over to dig for his clothes.

        His ass and cock was literally in my face. It was so reachable, but I couldn't have it.

        Well played, Kenji. Well played.

        I sat back as he found his clothes, and I struggled to keep a boner away and resisted the urge to ravish Kenji in his room.

         He didn't want me touching him, so I wasn't going to.

         I was grateful when he got clothed, and we made our way out of his room. "Where are we headed?" he asked as he put his shoes on at the front door.

        Jordans, of course. At least, that was constant.

        He stood up with a blank look. "Or did you just barge into my apartment without a plan in mind?"

        I didn't have a plan, but he didn't have to know that.

        "Driving," I said instead as we stepped out the door. "We're going driving."

        Kenji paused for a second. "Driving?" He seemed to contemplate it before smiling at me with a bob of his head. "Okay. Driving it is."

        He closed the door, and I grabbed his hand and led the way. "What are you doing?" he asked when I refused to let go of his hand and kept our fingers interlocked.

       "Holding your hand." I peeked back at him as we made our way to my GMC. "Until we get to the car."

        He slit his eyes, but his lips quirked up at the sides, and he said, "Until we get to the car."

        I nodded and stared ahead with Kenji's hand in mine and no clear destination in mind. But I looked forward to it, just because Kenji was with me.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

* What do you guys think about Darian and Gyan's "breakup?" Darian's realization? Danji's interaction in this part?

* I'm running late for a meeting, my left wrist is killing me, and a lot is going on, but I'm happy I got this out there. I have a feeling you guys will definitely like the next part. 😉