Kenji stuck through with his promise, and after I picked him up, he spent my birthday with me. He cooked nabemono and baked triple-chocolate brownies. He even made sekihan—rice and red beans—since it was my birthday. We surely did eat like gluttons. Hey, we were two hungry boys.

Kenji also told me Clay wished me "happy birthday." I was too elated by his presence to even frown at the mention of that fucker's name. So I focused on the beats and lyrics we jammed out to instead. For that brief moment, I forgot Rosalyn had him again.

I had him all to myself for that night.

It was nice seeing Gavin and Aaron, and it was great talking to my mother and sisters, but Kenji and our time together was the highlight of my birthday.                                                                  

Not even the fact that my father and I didn't talk bothered me.

Now, I sat on the couch with Aaron in his and Gavin's apartment. We had just finished playing some Call of Duty: Black Ops III. Aaron was drinking some beer while I resisted the urge to grab a bottle.

"You know you can drink in moderation, right?" he said, bringing the bottle down from his lips.

"I'm not there yet," I said, and he cocked his head to the side. "I don't have enough self-control right now to only drink in moderation. I either drink excessively, or I don't drink at all. There's no such thing as moderation at this point."

"Damn." Aaron shook his head, leaning on his elbows as he set his beer down. "You're serious about this, aren't you?"

"I have to get my shit together," I said. "I've reached my dead end. Now, it's time to start over."

"Look at you." Aaron smirked. "Getting your shit together. Oh, you're getting shit together alright. Bullshit!" He laughed, and I rolled my eyes.

"Whatever, dude." I leaned back in the couch, crossing my arms and staring at the home screen of the game. "What about you? Still got family drama?"

"You just had to bring it up." He huffed.

"I wouldn't be me if I didn't."

Aaron rubbed his head. "I'm still not talking to my parents, and Reid doesn't try anymore. He's done calling me. Your old man gave up on you. My older bro gave up on me. We're something, aren't we?"

"Thanks for reminding me," I said, my voice laced in sarcasm. "But this isn't about me. It's about you. Don't you want to at least try and make things right with them? You can't go the rest of your life without your family, Aaron. Yeah, my dad cut me off, but at least I have my mom and sisters. I don't know what I'll do if I had no one."

"I'll always have you and Gavin," he rebutted.

"You know what I mean." He was silent, and I uncrossed my arms.

"Reid was right," Aaron said. "I'm no man. I'm just a boy. The troublesome boy I've always been. The boy I always will be." He twisted his lips to the side as he stared at the table with a dull look. "A boy," he whispered.

Neither me nor him spoke for a couple seconds.

When I couldn't take it anymore, I said. "I used to be a bully."

Aaron glanced my way. "What?"

"I used to be a bully," I repeated. "We used to be bullies. You. Me. Gavin. We were bullies. No one fucked with us, but we didn't need a reason to fuck with people. That's what we were in high school. Bullies. Goons." Aaron chuckled. "But we're not that anymore. Now, we're no saints."

"Never," Aaron said.

"But we're not bullies," I added. "We've evolved from that. If we can change then, we can change now." I smiled at him. "If you can stop being a bully, you can stop being that troublesome boy. You can become the man you want to be. All you have to do is try."

"Is there a point in trying?" he asked.

"That's for you to decide."

I shrugged, and Aaron stared at me. "Since when do you go around giving inspirational speeches?" There was humor in his tone. 

"That wasn't a speech. That was like a paragraph." Aaron sent me a look of annoyance, and I snickered. "I don't know." I decided to take his comment seriously. "I guess you have to get lost beyond the point of continuation to realize you are lost." 

"'Beyond the point of continuation' meaning joblessness, potential eviction, tension between friends, and moving from upper-class to lower-class status?" Aaron said.

"Yeah, that." We laughed, pushing each other back as the mood lightened. "You're a knucklehead, you know that?"

"And you're a jerk," he said.

"I know."

Aaron flashed me a small smile. "But thanks, man."

"No problem. You know I have your back—with or without your family." I returned his smile.

"You're not too bad, Darian," Aaron said, his grin widening. "You can be a jerk sometimes, but you're not too bad. You're kind of soft." He poked me.

"Soft?"

I hoped I heard wrong.

"Yeah," Aaron said. "Beyond that thick layer of douchebaggery is a soft marshmallow."

"Oh, hell no. A marshmallow?" Aaron burst into laughter, and I shook my head, not believing what I just heard. "I can't believe you just called me a marshmallow." Aaron laughed harder, grasping his middle, and I narrowed my eyes at him. "You think this is funny, fool?" I pushed his head back.

"There goes the marshmallow," he said, still chuckling. "The douchebag is back."

"Idiot!" I grabbed him in a headlock as he continued to laugh, and I ruffled his hair with my fist. "Calling me soft? A marshmallow?!"

"Douchebag!" he yelled while fighting to get out of my hold.

"Damn straight!" I shouted. "No marshmallow in this dude."

"I hope not," Aaron said, slapping my arm locked around his neck. "There are sex toys for that."

Even I couldn't help but laugh at that. I eventually released him, but I continued to give him a hard time for calling me "soft" and a "marshmallow." We were messing with each other like we usually did, but he was smiling and laughing. His mood was lifted, despite his family drama, and I was glad for that.

Maybe that was the Marshmallow Darian taking over.

Disgusting.

But I still smiled.

An hour later, I called Honoka. My talk with Aaron confirmed that I had waited long enough to confront some of my problems myself. Everything was falling into place, except with her. These past few days, I had to do all this damage control, so I gave props to my father. Fixing all the things I fucked up was hard work. I didn't know how he did it all those years.

"Hello?" Honoka answered.

"What's up, Honoka?"

"Why are you calling me?" She didn't sound too upset, so that was good.

"Just wanted to talk."

The line fell silent. "Cut to the chase and stop feeding me bullshit."

         Damn.

When did Honoka become so feisty? She used to be a little kitten, and now she was a fierce tigress. Geez.

"Fine." As she wished. "I'm calling because I want to apologize. I'm sorry for all the shit I did to you guys, and I'm sorry for abandoning you. I was a terrible friend and a terrible person in high school."

"You were a terrible person in high school," Honoka confirmed.

Well, don't hold back.

Jesus. I knew I was a terrible person in high school, but I didn't understand why that shit was coming back to bite me in the ass after high school. After I'd changed.

Karma wasn't a bitch. She was the Devil's succubus.

I sighed. "I never should have treated you guys the way I did. You were all nothing but supportive of me, and I didn't give you guys enough credit. I still don't. I'm sorry, Honoka." She remained silent. "I'm really sorry."

"Do you mean it?" she asked.

"What?"

"Do you mean it?" she repeated. "Being 'sorry.' Do you actually feel remorse for what you did, or are you only doing damage control?"

Did she read my mind? But as I thought about it, I did mean it. I was doing damage control, too, but I was sorry for treating the others the way I did.

I literally dipped out on them without even a "peace out." I stopped talking to them and let them loose like they meant nothing to me. At least my father warned me that he was giving up on me—a luxury I didn't grant my old friends. They didn't even deserve it.

Clay, Kenji, Honoka, Arya and Alissa were amazing friends. 

And I repaid them by being a shitty one.

For the first time, it really dawned on me how sorry I was for abandoning them.

"I am sorry," I said, my voice barely audible. "I really am sorry, Honoka—for all of it."

"That's the first time you've apologized to me," she said. "For anything. We were friends for seven years, and this is the first time I've gotten an apology from you. And you've done a lot of shit, Darian, even before you left." Her voice was becoming shakier. "The first time."

"I know."

"Do you?" she said. "I'm not trying to attack you or be a bitch. I'm just sick of being silent. I've always been silent—especially when it comes to you."

"Honoka, I—"

"Let me speak." I clamped my mouth shut. Okay. "My whole life, I've always been the quiet, good girl that everyone thought they could walk all over. The one who wouldn't say anything, and the one who would take it. Take all that was thrown at her without a word—without a fight and without a voice. I never had a say in anything." I didn't know what to say to that. "That's why I called you out. That's why I'm no longer that innocent Honoka. I want to be heard. I don't want to be walked over anymore—especially not by the people who are supposed to care about me. Especially not by you. For the first time in my life, I'm no longer silent. I'm done with taking shit from everyone and letting them get away with it. I'm done, Darian."

She took in a deep breath, finally stopping.

"Wow," I said. "How long did it take you to get the courage to say this?"

"Way too long," she replied.

"Well, good for you," I said. "No one should walk all over you. I told Kenji this before, and I'll say it again. Call everyone out for their shit, even if that includes me. Let us know how you're supposed to be treated."

"You were right," she said. "I wasn't mad because you left with Arya. I was pissed because you abandoned us in high school. You wronged us, and now, years later, you're acting as if it's okay. As if you didn't do anything wrong when you hurt people who cared about you. People you were supposed to care about in return. Was that anger long overdue? Yes, but I'm glad it finally came out."

"I'm glad, too." I meant it, because even though I was on the receiving end of that anger, keeping things in didn't help anyone. "And I was wrong for not taking responsibility for my actions—for not owning up to my mistakes regarding you guys."

"I kept it in for so long—my anger towards you," Honoka said. "I told myself that it was okay. I was sad, but for years, I told myself what you did was okay. It wasn't okay. I know that now, and I'm tired of lying to myself. I know I'm seen as Honoka, the girl who's always so civil and gets along with everyone, but it's exhausting. It's exhausting being that person who's never allowed to be angry or hurt or even to show those emotions. I don't want to be that girl anymore. I'm a person. People get angry and hurt, and you hurt me. You pissed me off. I got tired of keeping it in. Like a cloud, there's only so much I can hold in." I arched a brow. "Eventually, it'll all come rushing out in the form of a violent storm." She went silent for a second. "That was such a lame analogy." She groaned. "I'm trying to be serious, and I'm making lame analogies."

I laughed. "It's not. It's kind of poetic." She joined me in laughter, but I didn't miss the frustration behind it.

"You know what I mean."

"I do," I said. "And you're right. I told Kenji this, too. You're human. There's nothing wrong with being human."

Kenji and Honoka had a lot more in common than they thought.

"I'm sorry I snapped on you," she said. "I'm sorry I let the storm out on you, but it was bound to happen eventually."

        This analogy. I liked it. "You're good. Sometimes, a storm is all you need to be heard, and I heard you, alright. Again, I'm sorry."

"I've waited so long for an apology—for everything," she said. "I don't know how we ended up like this."

"Yeah," I said. "Sad, isn't it?" She didn't respond. "Honoka?" She remained silent, meaning I had her attention. "I know me and you don't have the best history, and it's my fault. You have every right to be mad at me, and you don't have to accept my apology, but please don't take this out on Gavin. Don't let the beef between me and you get in the way of you guys' relationship. Gavin really cares about you. He's trying so hard to make things work between our groups, and he wants us all to get along. Don't make him and you guys' relationship suffer for my past actions." She still didn't speak. "Please, Honoka. He's a good guy in a tough position right now. We shouldn't make him feel as if he has to choose between his best friend and his girlfriend."

"I agree," she finally said.

"Exactly!" At least she agreed with me on that. "You and Gavin care about each other too much to let something as stupid as this get between you two."

"You're right. We're talking and hanging out like usual, but there's still some tension."

"That shouldn't be there in the first place. Talk to Gavin. If there is going to be tension, let's keep it between me and you. We don't have to bring Gavin into this. He shouldn't be punished for my crimes."

"Thank you, Darian." I could hear the smile in her voice.

"I'm only looking out for you two."

Gavin was one of my best friends, and Honoka used to hold the title. I still cared about her and the others, even though we hadn't been friends in years. The four years apart would never erase those seven years of friendship.

"You caring this much? That means a lot," Honoka said. "I really miss you, Darian." My expression relaxed from her words. "We all miss you."

"I miss you guys, too."

I didn't like thinking about it, and I pushed the thought to the side, but talking to Honoka now confirmed it.

I missed my old friends. 

I missed Clay's white-boy-wanting-to-have-swag stupidity. I missed Alissa's not-giving-a-fuck attitude. I missed Arya's I'll-kill-you-if-you-fuck-with-me look. I missed Honoka's schoolgirl-but-has-potential-to-be-thunder voice. I missed it all.

My new set of friends could never replace my old set of friends—no matter how hard I tried convincing myself otherwise.

"This conflict between us can end, you know," Honoka said. "I'll like to end it. Being mad at you is exhausting. This conflict is exhausting. All the tension, drama and fighting is exhausting. I just want it to all end. I want us to be on good terms again. Is that so much to ask?"

"No, it's not. I'll like that."

The beef between us was exhausting. It literally made me want to crawl in bed and sleep.

"Then let's do it. Right now. Let's end the 'beef.' I want us to move on—me and you. Even you and the others."

"Sounds good."

I wanted to end the beef between me and my old friends, too. They were important people in my life once. They could be important again, and I didn't mind that.

For the first time in years, I was ready for that—just like that boy they grew up with.

I chuckled. "Just don't say 'beef' again."

"Shut up," she groaned.

"It sounds weird when you say it."

"I'm sorry that you're the only one allowed to say 'beef,' Darian." The sarcasm was evident in her voice.

"Hey, not everyone has my talents," I said in my defense.

"You have talents?" Her tone was jovial. "Since when? I thought you smoked it all out of your system."

"Ouch!" I placed my hand on my chest. "That was hurtful."

"Hey, if you can't handle it, don't dish it out."

"Touché," I said, nodding in approval. We laughed.

Honoka and I continued talking, about anything and everything. I told her about the current job situation I was in. She told me she was a health fanatic now who loved to work out. I told her about my family. She told me about her mother being back, even though I already knew that from Kenji, but it was nice. She even wished me a "happy belated birthday." Talking to Honoka made me realize how much I missed it.

Arya always called a long hiatus from people a "lost weekend." Maybe it was time I returned from mine.

After we hung up, I was content and relieved.

Damage control was over—for now.

Then my phone rang.

I grabbed my head. It never ended. Unless it was Kenji, I didn't feel like talking anymore. I still picked up. "Hello?"

"Darian," my mother greeted.

I sat up straight, even though she couldn't see me. "Mom. What's going on?"

"We're having a family dinner tomorrow night. That's what's going on."

        Oh, no. "Mom, I—"

"You're coming, and it's not up for discussion," she stated.

"Mom, I'm nineteen. I'm not a kid anymore."

"I don't care if you're ninety-two. You'll always be my kid," she pointed out. "You're coming, and that's final."

"I don't think that's a good idea, Mom." It wouldn't have even been a good idea back when my father was in my life, yet alone now.

"I don't care," she said. "No more escaping family dinners or family nights or family events. I know you moved out, but that doesn't mean you abandon the Ansel name. As long as your name is Darian Ansel, you're a part of this family. And members of this family come to dinner." She took in a breath. "I'm done taking 'no's' from you, Darian. It's time I started acting like the adult and started acting like the mother. Mother says you're coming to dinner, so you're coming to dinner."

Where was this coming from? When did my mother become a lioness? I was so shocked that I was speechless.

"I'll be expecting you at the house tomorrow night at seven. Have a wonderful day, son." I didn't miss the smile in her voice. "See you at dinner."

She hung up.

What just happened? Did I not get a say in this?

Why was everyone suddenly growing balls on me?

Kenji was right. I was losing my touch—losing it big time.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

* So Darian did some damage control. What do you guys think is in store for their old group? Also, what do you suspect will happen with this dinner?

* This chapter is dedicated to rebel_xx because she's been one of my earliest supporters on here—all the way back in spring 2015. She still supports me, and she's one of my closest friends on Wattpad. Thank you, and I appreciate you lots, girl! 😊

* This is slightly off topic, but a while back, I was watching London Has Fallen. I sure felt for the MC of that action movie.

* Darian thinks he can't be the main character of an action movie. I know I can't be the main character of an action movie. I'll succumb to my incompetence and die in the first ten minutes. I can't. Darian has a better shot than me, that's for sure. Lol 😂

* Song is "Way Down We Go" by Kaleo