Aarav chuckled as we drove to his house, getting my attention. "What's so funny?" I asked.

        "You and Arya," he said. "You two used to be such good friends for how many years? Eight?"

        "Nine," I corrected.

        "Exactly," he said. "Now, you hate each other."

        "I don't hate, Arya," I said. "I just don't care anymore."

        "That's worse," Aarav said. "At least hate is a strong emotion close to love. Indifference isn't."

        "What's your point?"

        "My point is," he said, "it's frightening how people and your relationship to them changes in life. Just because someone is your best friend now doesn't mean they'll always be your best friend. Just because someone is your boyfriend now doesn't mean they'll always be your boyfriend."

        He sent me a look, and I narrowed my eyes with a smile. He was throwing shade at my and Darian's relationship.

        I understood though. Darian and I went through a lot of transition periods. We were best friends. Then we became strangers. Then enemies. Then friends with benefits. Finally, boyfriend and boyfriend. We were a lot of things to each other, but I had faith that we would only go up from here—not down.

        "More reasons why I don't get attached to most people," he said. "It'll only be a world of hurt. People change too much. They change their mind. They change who they are. How can a relationship keep up with that?"

        "By evolving," I said. "The relationship me and Darian have today won't be the same as the one we'll have in, say, five years. People change, so why shouldn't relationships? When that happens, it's best to go with the flow, instead of against it."

        My therapist and I were working on my unwillingness to let go of the past. Whether that was past relationships. Past occurrences. Past personality traits. Anything that was no more but that I was still holding onto. This included my parents being married. The old group setup with Camila. The car accident. My past with Darian and all the grieve that came with it. And yes, my relationship with Arya. It was difficult, but talking about it and allowing myself to slowly let go of these things was more liberating than holding on for dear life to a cause that was futile.

        I would never forget these things, but it was time I let go.

        "I'm just afraid of things going badly," Aarav said. "I've told you this many times. I don't like letting people in and having them—"

        "Screw you over," I finished. "I know, Aarav." 

        "I don't think you do," he said with a forced chuckle. "Every person I meet, I'm afraid they'll hurt me. Every single one."

        I turned slightly in my seat to focus on him while he stared forward.

        "Whether it's my teachers," he went on. "My classmates. Varun-ji's business partners. Even your little group that used to exist. I'm not paranoid, but I know everyone I meet has the potential to hurt me. To use me and abuse me."

        Maybe he had abandonment issues.

        "Every single person I see, I feel that in my gut, and I don't want to feel that way anymore," he said. "I don't want to be that kid who's afraid of going home because he doesn't know what to expect. That kid who's afraid of talking to his dad or talking at all because he's afraid the wrong word would lead to a beating or him having to watch his mother get raped again."

        Geez. He told me about his father, and the guy sound like every insult you could think of, but hearing it out loud was still disheartening.

        "Aarav..." I patted his shoulder, not having the right words.

        "I don't want this to keep following me," he said. "I don't want to be afraid anymore. Not of my father. Not of other people. My mother, Varun-ji, and especially you and Arya are the only ones I'm comfortable around. When I'm with you two, I feel empowered and strong. Everyone else, they think I'm pompous, an ass or even pretentious. Honestly, I'll rather be those things than to be weak and helpless. Never again."

        "You can be strong without being an ass."

        "Tell Darian that," he said with his lips curling up at the sides.

        "Dude." I punched his arm, and he laughed. "Leave Darian alone."

        "Darian knows about my dad."

        "What? How?"

        "Gyan," he said. "I don't know why Gyan told him, but Gyan himself shouldn't have known in the first place. If I could kick his ass I would."

        Gyan. I remember the days I kind of hated his guts. Back when he and Darian were hooking up. Scratch that. I never hated him. I felt inferior to him, which was bullshit. I was pretty awesome myself. Gyan and I were just awesome in different ways. Obviously, Darian preferred my type of awesome.

        "Anyway, enough about my dad." Aarav glanced my way. "How're you holding up? With the video and everything."

        That stupid video. I was more concerned about Darian. He was the one not completely ready to come out. He was getting there, but this video rushed it. I didn't care what people think. I got a lot of messages on social media with old classmates and friends asking how I was doing and trying to get information. No one was cruel, but when it came to Darian, that was a different story. The stuff people were saying about him...I was just glad he wasn't checking it out. He didn't want anything to do with social media right now, which was for the best.

        "I honestly don't care," I said with a shrug. "If people wanna watch me kiss my boyfriend, let them be my guest. While they do that, I'll just continue kissing my boyfriend."

        Aarav scrunched up his face. "It kills me that you're with Darian."

        "Aarav—"

        "He's bad news," Aarav said. "All he brings is drama. With all you're going through, you don't need drama in your life right now."

        "What drama does Darian bring?"

        "Based on everything you've told me, and you've told me a lot, Darian is the reason your depression came back."

        I whipped my head so fast in his direction that I pressed against the door. "What?"

        Aarav nodded. "Everything that was stressing you out with Rosie and your feelings for Darian, they wouldn't have been an issue if he never re-entered your life. Darian triggered your depression."

        "It's complex," I said. "There's no way one person could trigger depression."

        "He played a role," Aarav said. "Now, you're trying to get better, which you are. You're less timid now, and I think therapy is good for you." I smiled. "But he's still bringing drama." My face dropped. "The whole Arya thing with the secret, which seems like total bullshit. Then now, a video gets released because of him."

        "It wasn't his fault," I made sure to remind. "He's a victim in this."

        Aarav rolled his eyes. "Answer this, Kenji. Ever since Darian re-entered your life, how much drama followed him?" I stared at him with my mouth opened and nothing coming out. "From that look, I'm guessing a lot."

        "That's not fair," I said. "I partook in the drama, too. It wasn't all Darian."

        "But you were reacting to Darian," Aarav pointed out. "He's the one who did a lot of the initiating of drama, not you."

        "Okay, we're dramatic," I admitted. "I'm not going to break up with Darian because of that."

        Aarav parked into his driveway, and he killed the engine to face me. "Is that good for your mental health though?" I sighed in annoyance. "Being around such a dramatic person? Aren't you supposed to be on low stress right now? Drama leads to stress, and don't forget school. That'll always be stressful, so you definitely don't need additional stressors."

        Aarav should have been a lawyer. His ability to back up his claims was amazing. He also had an ability to make people change their mind. It was fascinating and frightening.

        I was going to admit it. Darian came with drama, and Aarav was right about that. However, I still wasn't breaking up with him. I would take the drama and the stress, as long as I had Darian.

        "Let's go." I opened the car door, and Aarav followed suit. "Are your parents home?"

        Aarav locked the car as we made our way to the front door. "Nope. My mom is hanging out with her friends, and Varun-ji is working."

        He opened the door for us, and we walked in. Aarav and I stashed our shoes somewhere in the foyer before fully entering the house.

        "Let's go to the game room." Aarav led the way into a huge basement with various video games, cards, and even a pool table. "We're playing pool today."

        "I don't get a choice?" I joked, and he grabbed two sticks.

        "Do you mind playing pool?"

        I shrugged. "No. Why not?" I grabbed one of the sticks, and Aarav got the balls ready. "You don't like video games?"

        Aarav shook his head as he stood upright. "They're okay, but they're kind of juvenile. Also, highly addictive. Why would I waste my days away on one thing when I could be doing multiple?"

        I grinned. "Maybe you are pretentious."

        He elbowed me, and I chuckled. "I like pool," he said, "and street racing." I frowned. "If I was addicted to video games, I wouldn't get to do those things and so much more."

        "Video games seem better than street racing." I went first, and I didn't get a ball in. "Safer, too."

        "Street racing is the real adrenaline rush." He bent over and squinted one eye to get his target, and then he went for it. Two balls went in, and my eyes expanded. What? "There's nothing like it," he said while standing up.

        "Why do I have a feeling my attempts at winning are pointless?"

        He grinned. "You always have to try."

        I did try, but it was useless. We played two games of pool, and Aarav won each one. I should have known. He played it often. I'd only played it twice before now. After a while, my throat was dry, so I put my stick down.

        "Can I get some water?"

        "You know where the kitchen is?" Aarav asked as I ascended the stairs.

        I peeked back at him. "I've been here before, Aarav."

        "I know." He flashed me a smile, and I opened the basement door.

        The kitchen wasn't far from the basement door, but I stopped when I saw a familiar face.

        Arya.

        She leaned against the kitchen counter with a glass in her hand and what I assumed was liquor. She was staring ahead as if lost in her thoughts.

        She wasn't going to intimidate me anymore.

        I continued walking and made sure to clear my throat. Arya's eyes met mine, and they went round.

        "Kenji." She pushed herself off of the counter, but I kept the island between us. "What are you doing here?"

        I grabbed a glass and got some water from the fridge. I even drank my water and sighed before turning to face her. "Why does it concern you?"

        Arya looked around, appearing confused. "Because it's my house?"

        Oh, right. Did she think I randomly showed up here? This was kind of weird from her perspective.

        I went over to the sink, and Arya took the glass from me to put it in the sink. "Leave it. We'll put it in the washing machine."

        "Thanks." I turned to leave, but she grabbed my arm and turned me around.

        "Kenji, what're you doing here?" she asked while setting her glass down, and we stood face to face.

        "Don't worry. I'm not here for you," I told her. "I'm done chasing you and trying to earn your forgiveness. I'm through with trying to make things right between us."

        "I'm sorry about that," Arya said. "I'm really sorry, Kenji. I'm sorry for everything. For the way I treated you—after the accident and recently. For what I did with the whole you and Clay incident. Most importantly, for what I did with you and Rosie. That didn't help anyone. Rosalyn is heartbroken. I feel like shit, and I have a feeling you do, too. I'm sorry for everything."

        I scoffed. "Is this damage control?"

        "No," she said. "The damage has already been done. I'm just apologizing for it."

        "Exactly, Arya." I took a step back. "The damage has already been done. Do you know how much I would have appreciated you saying this sooner? Like in high school? Maybe even a couple months ago? Do you know how much I missed you? How much I hated myself for you hating me?"

        She took a step forward. "I know, Kenji."

        "No, you don't." I kept an arm out to keep her back. "You and I were friends for nine years, but you just threw it all away when times got tough. The worst part is you turned against me. You didn't just cut me off. You became my enemy. Instead of loving me like a friend, all you did was cause me pain."

         Tears gathered in her eyes. "I know. I'm sorry."

        "You keep saying you 'know,' but I don't think you do."

        "I know!" she said. "I know I've hurt you. I know I've hurt the others. I wish I didn't hurt the people I cared about in my own mess, but I have. I'm very aware, Kenji, and it eats at me. You have no idea how many things eat at me, but I still do them. But now, I'm tired of this cycle because there's nothing left to eat at."

        We stared at each other, me watching for sincerity and Arya's tears on the verge of falling.

        Arya was my friend for nine years, but that was the past. I needed to stop holding onto the past because some things were futile.

        My relationship with Arya was futile.

        "Good luck with the rest of your life, Arya." I turned to leave, but she grabbed onto my arm again.

        "Please, don't."

        "What?" I faced her. "I can't do this anymore. You're toxic for me, and I guess I'm toxic for you, too."

        "Why're you here then?" She genuinely looked confused. "You come to my house, but you want nothing to do with me?"

        "I'm here with Aarav," I said, and she took a step back. "Not everything's about you, Arya."

        Her eyes broadened as it sunk in. "You can't be serious. Since when are you and Aarav friends?"

        "Since when do you know anything about me, Arya?" I asked. "We haven't been friends in years." She chuckled but it stopped abruptly, then she continued to chuckle. I quirked a brow. "What's so funny?"

        She quieted her laugh. "You think I'm toxic for you, but you're friends with Aarav." She stopped and watched me carefully. "The sad part is you don't see the irony."

        "Aarav doesn't hurt me," I reminded her. "You do."

        She grabbed onto my arm with a look of desperation in her eyes. "You have to stay away from him, Kenji. He isn't good for you."

        "Like you?"

        "You don't understand." Her grip hardened. "I bet even you don't understand Aarav. He's manipulative."

        "Stop it." I freed myself from her hold.

        "He's controlling," she continued. "He convinces you to do things the way he wants, but he does it in a way that makes you feel as if you actually have autonomy."

        "Stop it."

        "Everything he says, he says it in a way that makes sense to you, and he can make you believe anything."

        "Stop it!" I hollered, and she jerked back, but she came closer again.

        "You're dating Darian," Arya said. "You can't be friends with him. If you keep being friends with him, you're going to break up with Darian."

        "As if I can't think for myself."

        I would never break up with Darian.

        "He'll make you believe you're thinking for yourself when you do it. You have to stay away from him."

        "You have no say in my life anymore, Arya."

        "What's going on?" The two of us looked to the side, and Aarav approached us. He stopped beside me, and the two of us faced Arya. "Is there a problem here?"

        Arya turned around and reached for her glass. She downed it in one go and slammed the glass down with her back facing us. She stayed that way.

       "Let's go," I said. "There's no problem."

        Aarav and I turned to leave. "Kenji," Arya muttered in a small voice.

        I stopped and peeked back at her. "I'm done, Arya. I'm finally done."

        Aarav grabbed my arm, and he led us out of the kitchen. We put our shoes on at the foyer, and we walked out the door, heading for the yellow Ferrari.

"What was that about?" Aarav finally asked. We had been silent the whole ride. "I can't not ask anymore. What did she say?"

        "We just talked," I said, "about our failed friendship. Everything that's happened and so on."

        "That's all?" He perked a brow as he turned into my apartment complex.

        I thought about it. Should I tell him?

        "Yeah," I finally said. "That's it. It was just about me and Arya."

        Aarav continued to sneak peeks my way until he came near my building. What I didn't expect was to see Darian leaning against his GMC with a scowl on his face.

        The hell?

        As soon as Aarav stopped the car in front of Darian, he marched over to my side.

        "Darian—"

        "Get out." He opened the car door and yanked me out of it before slamming it shut.

        "Darian, what the he—Darian!"

        Before I could finish my statement, Darian walked around the car and punched Aarav square in the jaw. Aarav's head flung back, and he cupped his face.

        Darian grabbed him by the collar of his shirt. "You need to stay the hell away from Arya, and you need to stay the fuck away from my boyfriend."

        "Darian!" I grabbed onto him and pulled him off of Aarav. I pushed him back. "He didn't kidnap me, baka."

        "You're not hanging out with him anymore," Darian stated, matter of fact. "You're not seeing him either."

        I slit my eyes. "Excuse me?"

        Who was he? My father?

        "Like I said," Aarav said while getting the car ready to go, "drama. Now, he's controlling who you're friends with. Good luck with that, Kenji."

        Aarav began to reverse, and Darian growled, about to attack. I held him back. "Stop!" I shouted as Aarav turned the car and drove off. "What's your problem?"

        His focus returned to me, and he cupped my face in his hands. "Listen, baby, you have to stay away from him."

        "You sound like Arya."

        "Arya called me."

        That little...

        I groaned. "What the hell is going on? I can't take this shit anymore. First, there's some secret involving Arya, and you know about it. I can't know, and I've accepted that. Now, Arya is telling me to stay away from Aarav, and you're punching Aarav and telling me to stay away from him, too. Can someone tell me what the fuck is happening?"

        "Fuck!" Darian ran his hands through his hair as he paced in front of me. "I can't tell you the secret. I want to, so fucking bad, but I can't." He stopped in front of me. "I can tell you it involves Aarav. You can't be around him, Kenji. He's a bad guy."

        "People say you're a bad guy," I retorted.

        He straightened up. "It's not the same."

        "Why not?" I asked. "Because you're Darian Ansel, and he's Aarav with no last name?"

        "You don't know."

        "You're right," I said. "I don't know. I'm left in the dark about everything. The secret. How Aarav fits into this secret. I don't know shit, but I'm supposed to just stop hanging out with him because you say so?"

        "Kenji." He grabbed onto both of my arms. "Trust me."

        "No." I freed myself from his grasp. "Don't do that bullshit again. You keep telling me to trust you, and I have trusted you. I trusted you enough to let the secret go. I've trusted you to handle this alone without me knowing, but this I can't do. You expect me to end my friendship with Aarav without knowing why I'm ending it? Nah, that's bullshit," I said while shaking my head in disapproval. "You keep telling me to trust you, but why am I doing all the trusting?"

        "You just have to trust me," he said. "This is all about trust."

        "No," I said. "This isn't trust anymore, this is stupidity. Why would I end a good friendship when I don't have a solid reason to? Why don't you trust me, Darian? Arya told me to stay away from Aarav, but why doesn't she trust me with this secret? You and Arya want me to trust your word, but you won't trust me."

        "Kenji, that's not it." His eyes were getting desperate, and they reminded me of Arya's.

        "I'm not ending my friendship with Aarav," I said, and his shoulders slacked. "This isn't about trust anymore. You and Arya can't tell me who I can and cannot associate with, especially when you won't give me shit to go off of. I'm done with all of this."

        I turned around and walked off.

        "Kenji!" he shouted out to me. "I'm sorry, baby, but you don't understand."

       I placed my hands into my pockets, and I peered back at him. "You're right. I don't."

       I focused ahead, climbing the stairs and leaving Darian behind as he sighed in frustration and continued to ruffle his hair.

        I trusted him, but I wasn't giving up my friendship with Aarav. Not unless, I had a good reason to.

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* What do you guys think about Aarav's and Kenji's friendship? The things they talk about? Kenji and Arya? That last scene with Darian? What's left for the boys and the rest of the characters?

* Things are going to change after this. That's all I can say.