the irony of loneliness
is we all feel it
at the same time

"I can basically feel the role of Odette," Dahlia spoke as she stretched. "It was meant for me."

Sarah looked at Noelle, who just looked at her legs. She then looked back at Dahlia, an emotionless look on her face as she responded. "The role of Odette could go to anyone. I think that there are plenty of potential suitors for the role."

"Really?" Dahlia almost laughed glancing around. "It's not much competition, in my opinion. I haven't even seen half of these people perform yet and I can tell by the way they stretch they're not fit to play. And I really don't mean that condescendingly, I just mean you're asking someone who's seen the show live multiple times."

Sarah looked at Noelle again, who was focused on her stretches instead of the things Dahlia was saying. If Noelle were to listen to her, she knew she'd just get upset and that's the last thing she needed at the moment.

"I think Elle has a pretty good shot," Sarah spoke.

Dahlia looked at Noelle, a snort escaping. "Noelle is way too shy to play Odette, let alone Odile. The part obviously needs to be played by someone able to embody both characters."

Noelle was hurt by the comment but didn't say anything. She never did when Dahlia criticized her, which was probably one reason why the other girl grew so comfortable doing it. She just changed positions, stretching her arms.

"Well, today's the day they're going to decide who plays who. Let's see you put your money where your mouth is." Sarah smiled at Dahlia.

Dahlia smiled sweetly, although both Noelle and Sarah knew there was nothing sweet behind it. She then looked at Noelle, who'd yet to say a word. "Why don't we have a sleepover?"

"What?" Noelle asked, looking at the other girl. Despite how long Dahlia and her had been friends, she never once initiated a sleepover. She came over a couple of times and had even asked Noelle to come over once or twice, but it wasn't ever more than that.

"Seriously!" She exclaimed, "I'll come stay the night tonight, we can relax and let loose before these brutal practices we're about to endure. Sarah can come too." She side-eyed Sarah, before looking back at Noelle.

"I don't kn-"

"Your parents love me, too. So I'm sure that'll be an easy ask." Dahlia cut Noelle off again, "We have ten minutes before practice begins, you should go ask."

Noelle closed her mouth, her protest long gone. Dahlia seemed pretty consistent in her asking, and so she just sent Sarah one last glance before excusing herself from the auditorium. She quickly dialed her father's number, waiting for an answer. Just as it was about to send her to voicemail, he picked up.

"Are you done early?" He immediately asked.

"Uh, no. Just about to start, actually." Noelle messed with her top. "I was actually just wondering if Sarah and Dahlia could possibly stay the night tonight."

"Tonight?" Silas asked. He made a humming noise on the other side of the phone, "I guess so. Your mother and I both work tonight, so make sure you girls don't go around causing chaos. Stay inside the house, and-"

"Don't open the door to strangers." Noelle quickly cut him off, "Yeah, got it dad."

"Okay, would it be okay for Sarah to bring you home then?" He asked, "I'm going to be stuck here for quite a while."

"Uh-" Noelle stopped, glancing behind her. She then looked back to the floor in front of her, nodding before responding. "Yeah. I'm sure that Sarah wouldn't mind."

"Okay, love you, sweetheart," Silas said.

"Lo-" Noelle didn't finish, as Silas hung up before she could respond. She pulled her phone away from her ear, looking at the lock screen. "Love you too," She mumbled with a sigh.

Biting the inside of her lip, she composed herself before walking back into the giant auditorium. It was filled with both Kooks and Pogues, although the room was split in half between the two.

It had been like this for the last few rehearsals, as neither group liked the idea of having to work with the other. However, the excitement of getting to perform such a big production was enough for them to act civil toward each other.

"What did he say?" Dahlia immediately asked.

"Said yes," Noelle mumbled, shoving her cell phone back into her backpack.

"Knew he would," Dahlia said. "After practice, I'll go home and shower and get ready, then I'll meet you at yours."

Dahlia didn't wait for a response, she didn't care to. Another Kook she'd been close friends with had walked in, and she didn't hesitate to leave Noelle and Sarah for the girl.

Noelle didn't mind, personally. She didn't care because she was going to have to deal with her all night, and could only handle so much of Dahlia's criticism during practice. Sarah was much more tolerable and was slowly replacing Dahlia as her best friend.

"Well, tonight's going to be fun." Sarah sarcastically spoke, sending Noelle a look.

Noelle laughed lightly, her cheeks turning red. "Hey, I was wondering if it was okay if I got a ride home with you? My dad kinda bailed last second."

"Of course. As long as you don't mind listening to Topper and Rafe in the car for twenty-ish minutes. Or however long it takes for them to drop us off." Sarah responded.

Noelle shrugged, "I guess I don't really have a choice, do I?"

++

It didn't take long for practice to end. It felt more like an audition than it did a regular ballet practice, but that was mostly because Taylor and the others in charge of the production were looking for who they wanted to cast as the main characters.

Noelle wiped her forehead with the back of her hand, waiting in the front lobby with Sarah. Dahlia had already departed by now, telling Noelle she'd text her when she was arriving at her house. She just smiled and waved, letting the girl go. Sarah didn't wait to comment as soon as the other girl was gone, earning a light smile from the dark-haired girl.

"Oh, there he is!" Sarah suddenly exclaimed, shooting up from her seat.

Noelle looked out of the windows to see a car pull up, Topper in the driver's seat. He waved at his girlfriend, who excitedly waved back as she made her way to the car. Noelle followed behind, her pace much slower than the blonde who had already got to Topper's window.

"Noelle needs a ride. I'm staying the night with her anyway." She stated.

Topper just nodded, waving at Noelle. "Hey, Elle."

Noelle politely smiled, her cheeks turning red like they did anytime people gave her attention. It was rare to get, so if it were from anyone - Topper, Sarah, Rafe - she constantly blushed as she wasn't used to it.

"Sarah gets the front seat," Topper called out.

Noelle ignored the banter between him and the person in the passenger's seat and instead opened the door behind Topper's seat. She jumped to see someone was sitting there, that someone being Sarah's other brother, Sam.

"Shoot, sorry." She muttered, stepping back.

"No worries," He politely told her. "I'll let you in the middle since you're the smallest."

Noelle didn't protest, just thankful to have a ride home. She waited as he got out and got inside herself, scooting in toward the middle the way he suggested.

It wasn't long before Sam was in the seat to her left, and Rafe had gotten out and gotten in the seat to her right. She felt awkward being so close to someone, as she usually wasn't this close to anyone at all. Save for the exception of Sarah lately, she was used to being alone.

The drive to the Cameron's residence felt long. Noelle didn't say anything as they pulled up, nor did she protest as Sarah asked her to wait in the car while she ran to grab her belongings for the night.

Topper sat in the driver's seat all of two seconds before excusing himself, following the direction Sarah had gone in. This left Sam, Rafe, and Noelle. The silence was almost unbearable, and not even a minute later Sam excused himself.

Noelle watched as he followed after Topper, calling his name. He looked distressed and worried, but Topper didn't seem to respond as he glanced back at the other boy.

"They used to date," Rafe blurted out, noticing she'd been staring at the two.

"What?" Noelle softly asked. She looked over at Rafe, immediately looking away as she'd seen he was already looking at her.

"Topper and Sam briefly dated, but Topper broke it off when he fell for Sarah. Sarah doesn't know they dated, and Sam's trying his best to prevent their relationship from deteriorating but it doesn't seem to be working. Topper's making it hard." Rafe explained.

He was word vomiting, and Noelle knew this. She barely spoke to him besides the few forced conversations she'd had with him, so for him to tell her this was random.

"I saw you looking, figured you didn't know the drama. Trust me, be glad you don't have siblings." He scoffed, leaning back in the seat.

Noelle frowned. Part of her wished she had at least one sibling, because then maybe she wouldn't be so lonely. But she didn't have one, so she didn't know. She didn't have one, and so she was. She had nobody while her parents were never home, and she had nobody to share a life with. Someone who would be able to understand the way she felt.

"I guess so," She softly responded.

"Sarah was telling me that you're trying out for the main part in that Swan thing." Rafe changed the subject.

Noelle breathed in a sharp breath, wishing for nothing more than for Sarah to come back outside. But she didn't, and so Noelle was kind and responded to him.

"I'm not trying out for it. There's not normal auditions but moreso we dance for them and they choose who's the best fit."

"Right, yeah I get that." He nodded, although Noelle didn't think he did. "I'm sure you'll get the part of Odessa."

"It's Odette." Noelle softly corrected. "But I don't really care if I get the part or not."

Part of her did care, but she'd never admit it to anyone. She knew trying out for such a part would lead to nothing but disappointment, so the less people knew how badly she wanted it, the better.

"Well, either way, whatever part you get I'm sure will be great." It was an attempt at a compliment, and Noelle didn't know how to respond. She heard from the talks around the town - especially after becoming friends with Sarah - that Rafe wasn't the type to give genuine compliments.

His usual compliments consisted of when it came to sleeping with them, and they were the comments you'd hear the usual stereotypical rich boy say. Hot and sexy were a few, just to name. So hearing an actual compliment that seemed genuine confused Noelle, but she didn't give in or say anything to acknowledge it.

"You ever attend any of the beach parties?" Rafe asked.

"No," Noelle softly spoke.

"Why not? They're pretty fun. Music, dancing, alcohol. The whole sort." Rafe shrugged.

"Just never went was all." Noelle shrugged this time. Not to mention, her parents would die before letting her attend something like that. But Rafe didn't need to know this, so she didn't say anything.

"We're having one soon. Not sure when just yet, but it's in the works. You should come." Rafe offered.

"I'll think about it," Noelle responded. She wasn't going to think about it and she knew this, but she wanted the subject to change. She wasn't sure if Rafe was the type to pressure anyone into doing anything - she wanted to think he wasn't - but she knew you could never be so sure when it came to new people.

Thankfully, this was the end of the conversation. By the time Noelle responded to Rafe, the other three had come back to the car. Topper and Sam both seemed tense and upset, whereas Sarah didn't seem to notice and was instead happy as she carried her overnight bag.

Topper and Sarah chatted about whatever Topper brought up as he drove in the direction of Noelle's house. Noelle sat awkwardly between Sam and Rafe, her bag on her lap as she held it to her chest. Her leg brushed against Rafe's, the simple action sending butterflies through her body.

She hardly ever felt that feeling. It only happened because it was rare for her to get affection, and even though their thighs touching wasn't exactly 'affection', it was still a human touch which was rare for Noelle to receive. She didn't want to be touching him anymore, but knew if she moved any further to the left she'd be leaning on Sam - which she also didn't want. She was uncomfortable and the car ride couldn't end soon enough.

As soon as the car pulled up to the Bridgeman residence, Noelle felt calmer. Rafe was the one to let her out of the car, his tall frame hovering over her as she pulled her bag out from the car and stood straight.

"It was nice talking to you," He told her as Sarah spoke her goodbyes to Topper.

"Yeah, same." She awkwardly told him, her cheeks burning in the sun.

"We should really hang out. I think it'd be cool if you came to the beach party." Rafe told her.

"Yeah, sure. I should get going." She excused herself, pulling away from him. She didn't spare him another glance as she made her way up the driveway.

Sarah was behind her not too long after her and they entered the cool house. Noelle sat her bag on the floor next to the couch, slipping her shoes off shortly afterward.

When she turned around she was shocked to see her mother in the dining room, writing something on a small notepad.

"Mom?" Noelle asked, her brows pushing together in thought. "What are you doing here? Dad said you both had to work late tonight."

"I do, but I'm on a bit of a break. Silas told me you were having a sleepover tonight, so I thought I'd take you girls to the store to make dinner before I go." Danielle responded.

It was rare for Danielle to cook dinner, so the statement confused Noelle. She didn't protest, however, and just nodded. She excused herself to her room to change out of her sweaty clothes, and Sarah waited downstairs while she did so.

By the time Noelle was finished changing and reapplying deodorant, Dahlia was downstairs with Sarah waiting on her. She talked to the blonde about whatever topic she was on about at the moment, Sarah texting on her phone as she didn't pay too much attention.

"Oh! Good, you're ready!" Danielle exclaimed, grabbing her purse from the counter. "We should get going so I have the time to cook before going back to work."

Noelle didn't argue, and the three teenagers followed the older woman to her car. Danielle chatted with Dahlia during the car ride, who'd taken the front seat. Although it was odd Dahlia called the front seat when it was Noelle's mom, she didn't argue as she wanted to sit by Sarah anyway.

The two chatted silently to themselves as they drove, noticing fairly quickly the side of town they were driving in. Noelle knew where they were going, due to her parents coming over here every once in a while, although both Sarah and Dahlia looked confused as they approached the only spot Noelle knew on this side of town.

Heyward's Seafood.

It was obvious that Dahlia wanted to say something, but she didn't. Instead, she meekly got out of the car and followed Danielle into the store, along with Sarah and Noelle.

Inside the store, JJ Maybank stood with Pope Heyward.

"Yo, what is Dahlia Bronte doing here?" Pope asked, looking out of the window.

JJ shrugged, not bothering to look. "That prissy Kook? Who cares?"

"She's here with Sarah Cameron," Pope added. "And- Mrs. Bridgeman? Since when did the Cameron's and the Bridgeman's interact?"

"Who?" JJ asked, sending him a look.

Pope didn't respond, still looking out of the window. He watched as Dahlia stood with her arms crossed, standing extremely close to Danielle as if she'd caught something contagious if she were to step away.

After no response from Pope, JJ decided to go and take a look himself. He dropped the product he'd been holding and walked over to the window, standing next to his best friend. He watched as an older woman greeted Pope's dad politely. It was obvious she was a Kook, that she didn't belong.

He then glanced at Dahlia, having seen her around every once in a while. It was rare, but he did. She was one of the rudest Kooks known to man, one he didn't want to interact with ever in his life. Next to her stood Sarah Cameron, Rafe's little sister. She was also younger sister to Sam Cameron, someone who he'd talked with once or twice.

His eyes then landed on the last girl, standing on the other side of Sarah. JJ's jaw dropped as he saw who it was, the familiar dark-haired girl watching the interaction closely. He knew her, although he didn't know her. He saw her one day outside of the dance studio, and he watched her until her dad had shown up to get her.

JJ never told anyone about that day. He never told anyone about how he'd seen the most beautiful girl he'd ever laid eyes on, as he knew nobody would take him seriously. He said it often, and it was something that nobody blinked an eye for when he made comments like that.

"Who's that?" He asked without thinking.

"What?" Pope asked, looking at the blond.

"That-" He stopped, pointing to the girl. "The other girl. You know all about the Kooks, right?"

"Well, no," Pope answered, "Just the ones who are important."

"All of them are important though," JJ said. "So you don't know who she is?"

"The older woman there-" Pope stopped, pointing at Danielle. "That's Mrs. Bridgeman. Despite being a Kook she's very kind. She comes here often and is one of my dad's regulars."

"I don't give a damn about the old woman, Pope." JJ rolled his eyes, "I'm talking about her." He pointed again.

"First of all, Mrs. Bridgeman's not that old. Secondly, I don't know who that is." Pope shrugged, "Just another Kook."

She doesn't seem like a Kook, JJ thought.

"Assuming it's her daughter, from observation." Pope then added, "Mrs. Bridgeman mentioned she had a daughter, I've just never really seen her around or met her."

JJ nodded but didn't respond. He watched as Mrs. Bridgeman spoke to Pope's dad before turning to the raven-haired girl. She said something and handed her a sheet of paper, to which the girl nodded in response.

She said something to Sarah before leaving her and Dahlia with Danielle and walked toward the entrance.

"Shit, she's coming in," Pope muttered, pulling away from the window. "I do not feel like interacting with a Kook today, so I'm going to go into the back."

Before JJ knew it, Pope had disappeared. This left JJ alone in the front, having not moved by the time she walked in.

The girl didn't notice JJ's presence as she walked in, immediately beginning to search for the items on the small list given to her by her mother.

After a small argument with himself, JJ finally decided to approach. He waited until what he felt was the perfect moment, walking up beside her as she looked between two packages.

"I'd choose that one," He mumbled, pointing at the better option.

The girl jumped back, knocking into a shelf in the process. She gasped as everything on the shelf began to shake, but JJ nonchalantly reached back and prevented it from falling over.

"Thanks," She mumbled, balancing herself.

"No problem," He softly told her. "But seriously, choose that one. I know what the best option is, and it's that one." He sniffled, wiping the bottom of his nose.

She didn't say anything and instead looked between the two packages, finally choosing the one JJ had suggested. "Thanks," She mumbled again, her voice soft.

Her head tilted up as she finally looked up at him, her bright blue eyes meeting his. She didn't say anything and instead just awkwardly stood there, her cheeks burning as she seemed to realize how close they stood.

"I'm-I'm JJ," JJ said, pressing a hand to his chest.

"Nice to meet you," She told him.

JJ waited for her introduction but frowned when she didn't give one. As if she realized she hadn't introduced herself, she let out a dry laugh as she glanced away. "S-sorry, Noelle."

Noelle.

"Cool," JJ awkwardly said. "I like that name."

"Thanks?" She spoke, making it sound like a question.

"I don't see you around often," JJ told her.

"My parents are pretty-" She stopped, glancing out of the front window. "I don't get out a lot."

"I get that," JJ spoke, although he didn't. He was rarely home, he didn't know what it was like to stay inside often.

"I should probably-" Noelle stopped herself, waving the package in the air. "I have to get the rest of the list."

"Right, yeah. Sorry to bother it just looked as if you needed help." He nodded.

"Yeah, thanks." She shortly spoke. "It was nice to meet you, JJ."

She smiled at him as she began to turn away. JJ watched as she walked away, ignoring the feeling of his heart beating quickly in his chest.

"Nice to meet you too!" He shouted out, smiling at her. "Hopefully we'll see each other around, Noa!"

Noelle stopped, looking back at JJ. Her brows were pushed together, and for a second JJ thought he messed up by giving her a nickname. But then she smiled at him, nodding as if she agreed.

As if she wanted to see him around again.

++

I didn't expect this to be this long, but I enjoyed writing this, so enjoy!