Seokmin,

I hope you're doing fine. I miss you, things have been very different without you. We don't even talk anymore. It's not like we promised to stay in touch after you left anyway, so I wasn't expecting it. I just wish I could hear from you. A simple hello would be good enough, just so I know you hadn't vanished off the face of the earth. I'm so lost without you.

Do you remember us yet? Do you remember all the times we spent together? Do you remember when I said I love you? Because it's still true. I haven't forgot about you, though you've probably long forgotten about me. It has been two years after all. What am I still doing longing for you when I know you'll never come back to me?

Enough of the sad stuff. Are you wondering about me? I'm doing just great. I got accepted into my first choice college. I've been focusing a lot on my studies. I haven't even been on social media a lot lately, can you believe it? I barely know what's going on in the outside world anymore. I finish classes next month, one of those classes being Korean. When I found out my college offered it, I took it. It reminded me of you. I'm not completely fluent yet, but I know enough for basic conversation. After that, I can finally start my career as a photographer. Aren't you proud? I'm working hard and making something of myself.

What about you? I hope whatever it is you're doing, you're giving it your all and working hard. Knowing you, you probably are. I still remember that night you sang me to sleep, well, you sang until I fell asleep. Who knows? Maybe you did something with that amazing voice of yours. Maybe you're singing and making millions of people happy. Maybe you're giving some other girl butterflies in her stomach like you gave me. Maybe you moved on and you're kissing some other girl with those same soft pink lips you used to kiss me with. Maybe that girl is as madly in love with you like I was, well, am. Me? No, I have't found anyone. Hell, how am I supposed to find someone when you're still always on my mind. It's all your fault!

Anyways, I forgot to mention that you forgot your beaded bracelet here. I have it, it's mine now. I wear it everyday. And no I'm not going to give it back. Letting me have it is the least you can do since you wanted to lose your memories of us and be selfish not to offer me something to remember you by. Am I mad? No, not at all. I have this bracelet to remember you by, and of course the pictures we took together. It's not very many, but I cherish them. I never want anything to happen to them. Even when I get married and my husband wants me to get rid of them, I will tell him no because those pictures are too precious to me.

I wonder who you'll marry. Probably some beautiful fair skinned native Korean girl. The same girl who is in the place I was once in. My place. I was there first. Don't try to call me selfish, it's not like I put you on a leash. I set you free, remember? You just haven't come back to me yet. I never hoped you would because I didn't want to make my heart hurt more than it already had. It hurt, it still hurts. I'm wounded. I need to be put back together again, but I'm afraid that no one will be able to, only you can. By the looks of it, I might be wounded for a while.

You on the other hand, you don't even remember being with me, so your heart is just fine. You have that other girl filling your heart with love, open love. Love I couldn't give you because we had to sneak around. It must be nice not having to do that anymore, although you don't remember sneaking around. Sometimes I sit back and laugh at that. We were so in love that we went behind my parents back to date. Actually, scratch that. I was so in love with you.

I still remember when I first told you I loved you. You didn't even say it back. How could I be so stupid to think you really loved me? Yeah, you probably liked me since you also wanted to date, but how could you love me? I was just some fling. It's not like we actually had a future together. Why? Can you please tell me why I fell so hard for you? Why did I love you so much? Do you think it was just puppy love? Do you think that I just thought I loved you since you were the guy I really liked? What do you think? Whatever your answer is, I probably looked stupid, right? Saying I love you and not getting it back? Do you know how hurt I was? Do you know how that feels?

Look at me being selfish again. You were the one who was in real pain. If it wasn't for me, you wouldn't have been in the hospital. You wouldn't have lost your memories. I wish I could've told you everything we once had. I couldn't. Not just because it was the doctor's orders. To tell you the truth, even if I could've told you, I wouldn't have. I didn't want you to have to deal with whatever it was you felt for me in your heart right before you left like I did. Would I be selfish if that was the case? Did you want to remember? Did you desperately want me to tell you how we used to be? Are you mad at me for not telling you? But please know that it was for your own good. I wanted you to be happy. I didn't want you to feel bad for abandoning me and my feelings.

Here I go rambling on again in my letter to you, to no one. I actually hope you forgot about me. I don't want to burden your thoughts or hold you back from doing anything. Just remember me as an old friend. If you find yourself thinking about me, I hope you just say "Oh yeah, I remember her. Good times." Then move on. Just think of me as a fading memory. I don't expect you to remember me forever. I can't guarantee I will remember you forever. I'm sorry, but I have to learn to move on somehow. You would want that, right? You want me to be happy too, right? Maybe one day I'll wake up and you'll be completely erased from my memory. Maybe one day, but maybe not today. Anyways, make sure that you take care of yourself. Don't skip meals, get enough sleep and drink plenty of water. And please, forget about me.

Love, (y/n).