︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

You were riding your bike to the sound of "It's No Big Deal"
And you're trying to lift off the ground on those old two wheels
Nothing 'bout the way that you were treated ever seemed especially alarming till now
So you tie up your hair and you smile like it's no big deal

-Matilda-harry styles-

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

No one's POV:

Minho and Hana left for the hospital early in the morning, around 9a.m., and he even skipped his jog that morning because he was so tired. When Hana heard that she felt bad, but Minho reassured her that it wasn't her fault. He just couldn't fall asleep till 3am.

His mind revolved around Hana. He felt like he was going crazy. In his 25 years of living he'd never been this attached to a girl. But he knew he wanted to protect this girl with his life. He felt the need to give her anything and everything that she's ever wanted, be it love, care, affection or reassurance.

Actually, scratch out the line "In his 25 years of living he'd never been this attached to a girl."
Because he had been that attached to a girl before. But from his memory, she was long gone.

Maybe it's true, that first loves don't work out.

Every time his stomach made him feel weird around Hana, it scared him. Because he never intended to fall for her, but he was- slowly but surely. He was scared to love her. But what was worse that he was more scared of losing her. Just like it happened long ago.

Jisung had picked up the cats earlier that morning because Minho knew they wouldn't be back until later.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

They waited for Hana to be called in while she talked about random things, but it made Minho question if she was really okay.

"Choi Hana. Please go to treatment room no.8"
A nurse called out.

"I'll be back"
She said, getting up.

"Want me to come with?"

"I'll be fine, but if you want, you could."

"I'll come."

Once we were in and the nurse was unwrapping the gauze, someone called out for Hana. I recognized him for the same colleague who'd found her phone when she'd fainted at her rounds.

"Hana."
He said monotonously.

"Yedam?"
She said startled.

"You're better now? I heard what happened."
He asked her.

"Yes, I'm better now. how come you're here so early today?"

"Oh the professor took a leave today, so they said if some of us wanted to use that time to finish their shift early they could so I volunteered."

"Ah right. What do you mean you heard what happened?"

"I heard that you had an accident. What happened?"

"Nothing, I just fainted again."
She lied, but it was understandable because why would she tell everyone about her attempt?

"I see, catch you later, someone just paged me."
He said pulling out his phone with a flash.

"Bye?"
Hana said as he walked away quickly as he could.

"Is he close? How'd he know?"
Minho inquired.

"I don't really know him well—he just works with me. He's quite well-known on campus, with excellent grades and a wealthy background. Our dads are good friends and hold quite a bit of influence. Besides our work, I occasionally see him at the galas my parents attend. Oh and I hate his guts."

"He's peculiar, he was also the one who found your phone."

"Found my phone?"

"Yeah, that one time you fainted, you dropped your phone."

"I'm sure it's nothing."

"Am I hallucinating or did his phone flash when he take it out?"

"It did flash, maybe he has that weird setting for the flashlight to flash when you get paged."

"Okay, I guess."

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

The doctor removed the stitches, replacing them with a large bandage.

"It's healing, but not quite there yet. Good thing you came in today—otherwise, it could have led to complications. You'll need to change the bandage once a day, preferably at night, but you can do it whenever you like. You're cleared to return to university, as long as you're feeling better mentally. The internship will have to wait, but we have a volunteering opportunity next month. I can recommend you for that; it'll help with your extra credit,"
Dr. Shin said.

"You can do that?"

"Of course! And I'll be there for the volunteering, too."

"Really?" she squealed.

"Yeah, you can trust me on this."

"Thank you so much, sunbaenim!"

"Please, call me Areum. I've always liked you since you started here. You're my favorite and the smartest intern, but keep that between us. I really hope that when you graduate, you'll be a first-year resident on my team," she smiled.

"You're too kind! There's still a long way to go."

"Exactly. You have plenty of time, Hana. Just return to college, and you'll do great,"
she encouraged.

Minho could have sworn that Hana's face turned bright red at all the compliments, likely feeling shy.

"Thank you, Dr. Shin—Areum sunbaenim. I really hope you're right."

"Visit the fourth floor before you leave and go to reception No. 25. Tell them your doctor is in charge. You remember her, right?"

"Yes, Dr. Nam?"

"Perfect! Just ask the nurse, and they'll print out your schedule. And please, don't miss your appointments. If something comes up, check with her to reschedule, but try not to skip any sessions."

She secured the gauze with tape, ensuring it stayed in place.

"Thank you for everything."

"Don't mention it. You deserve it. And remember, call me if you need anything else," she said before leaving.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Minho spotted her again as they stood at the reception, waiting for the forms. Each time they visited the hospital, the fees had been waived, so Hana didn't need to submit her insurance anymore. Another reason to be grateful to Dr. Shin.

"Dr. Shin!"

"Mr. Lee? Is everything alright?" she asked, pausing and scanning for the source of the voice until she spotted Minho.

"I just wanted to thank you for everything you've done so far."

"Hana? Oh, it's nothing. She's lucky I like her, that's all."

"She seems to be doing better, but I worry it might be too soon to say she's okay. Just three days ago, she was in bed, struggling to find a reason to live."

"I understand your concerns. That's why she has a therapist. Whatever's going on, she'll open up to Dr. Nam or to you. This could be the start of something positive; maybe her will to live has been reignited."

"You didn't see her the way I did that day," he said, his gaze drifting away from the doctor and settling on Hana in line.

"If you're worried about anything, once she starts therapy, you can keep in touch with Dr. Nam and share your observations. Hana may not always recognize her own behavior, but you will."

"Is she really ready to go back to university?"

"From what I can see, yes. It should help keep her occupied and focused."

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

"How far is your gym from here?"

"Around 10 minutes. Why?"

"No reason."
She smiled like an excited kid in a candy shop.

"Why do you like Dr.Shin so much? You were quite literally glowing in front of her."

"I look up to her. She's well known in our department. She's the youngest resident but she's the most talented."

"I think she's nice, too."

"What do you usually do at the gym?"

"I exercise, practice solo, and sometimes I train with a partner."

"No offense, but that sounds kind of boring. You're alone the whole time."

"Not really; my coach is always there."

"Still, it's cool that you enjoy it."

"Would you like to grab something to eat before we go?"

"Will you eat with me?"

"No, not until at least 3 PM."

"Then I'm going to wait."

"That's a long time; it's only noon."

"You're overthinking it. I'll wait for you."

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

They spent a long time at the gym and had lunch at 3 PM, just like he promised. Hana watched Minho practice, taking pictures of him as he threw punches, laughing at his expressions. He was sweating, his hair tousled, but there was nothing unattractive about it. She loved seeing Minho in his element; he was so different from the guy she knew at home or with friends.

Later, around 6 or 7 PM, Hana was getting increasingly bored, and Minho decided to wrap up his day early. He figured it was okay to take it easy for once.

It was justified, right? They'd both been through so much in the past few days, and pretending everything was fine wasn't easy.

Before leaving, Minho collapsed onto the couch beside Hana, clearly exhausted from all the training. He got up and grabbed yet another bottle of water, gulping it down in a few quick swallows. His forehead glistened with sweat, and his arms were pumped from the workout.

"Whoa there, calm down!" Hana laughed at him.

"You try doing this for a day, and let's see if you can even get up the next morning," he replied, catching his breath.

"Hey, it's not like I don't work out! Try running around the hospital doing everyone else's dirty work."

"Aww, how cute. Now, please, let's go. Actually, wait—I need to take a shower first."

"I'm waiting; go ahead."
She waved him off, looking back at her phone.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

"What's your mom's name?"

"Lee Hong-ran."

"That's a beautiful name," she giggled.

"I can see you're excited?"
He smiled, but he was just masking his disappointment.

"Yeah, I know right, I usually avoid meeting new people."
She smiled between her words.

"Hana, please."
His voice almost as if he was begging.
"You don't need to be pretending around people. You don't have to pretend around me. You can be sad, you can still feel like giving up and I couldn't care less because I doesn't change the fact that.. you're you. It won't change the way anyone looks at you."

"But I'm not pretending. Where's all this coming from?"
Her smile down-turned.

"I could list out things that you've been doing ever since you're back from the hospital that otherwise you hated in general or wouldn't do."

"Like what?" she challenged, crossing her arms.

"You're suddenly okay with unwanted attention, you want to meet new people, you're not worried about going back to university or missing your internship. You're okay with living."

"So what? Was I supposed to stay unhappy? Should I have tried to do it again?"

"What I'm saying is that if you keep acting like everything is fine—especially after what happened two days ago—you'll break again, worse than before. You can't be okay this quickly unless you're forcing it."

He raised his voice slightly, and silence fell. Hana flinched at the sudden intensity, and Minho noticed it immediately.

"I'm not okay," she admitted when the car came to a stop.
"But I'm trying. I want to try for everyone."

"What about you?"

"What about me? You know I don't care."

"That's where you should start." He placed his hand over hers.
"I'm sorry for raising my voice. I didn't mean to affect you like that."

She shook her head, as if trying to clear her thoughts.

"We're here?"

"Yeah, that house is my parents'," he pointed out.

"You have a beautiful house. And it's big."

"Let's go?"
He asked as if, if Hana was to change her mind, he would.

"Yes, of course. Let's go."

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Hana POV:

"Mom? Dad? We're here!"
Minho yelled from the foyer.

I just kind of stood awkwardly, waiting to follow wherever Minho would go.

His parents appeared almost immediately, his mother's face lighting up with a warm smile. "Minho! It's so good to see you!" She enveloped him in a hug, and I stood a bit awkwardly and right behind him, not knowing what to do.

Curse my small height and his broad back because I'm sure they dint even see I was there.

"Mom I just saw you yesterday."
He chuckled.

She pulled back and said,
"But you left in a hurry because you said your roommate must be waiting."

"You did?"
I said coming from behind him.

"Hi, Mrs. Lee" I managed, offering a small bow, my heart racing.

"And you must be Hana!" she exclaimed, her face lighting up. She stepped toward me, arms open wide. "Welcome! It's so nice to finally meet you!"

"Thank you for having me," I replied, my voice barely above a whisper.

"Oh no, no! It's no trouble at all," she said, wrapping me in a warm embrace. "To me, you're just another child. You're welcome here anytime."

As her arms wrapped around me, my body froze, instinctively tensing up. The hug was comforting, yet it felt foreign to me. I had never experienced this kind of warmth before—an embrace filled with genuine care rather than obligation.

For a split second, my mind blanked out, caught between the softness of her hug and the harshness of memories I couldn't escape. I had never known this kind of affection before; it was a bittersweet reminder of everything I had missed.

Before I could respond, Minho chimed in. "Okay, okay! Let's not overwhelm her, Mom."

His voice broke through the haze, and I released a shaky breath, feeling a mix of relief and embarrassment. Mrs. Lee stepped back, her smile unwavering but her concern evident.
"I just want her to feel at home."

Minho shot me a knowing glance, his expression a blend of understanding and protectiveness. "She will, I promise,"

I nodded, though my heart still raced. "Yeah, I'm fine," I lied, forcing a smile. The warmth of Mrs. Lee's hug lingered, but it felt like a weight pressing on my chest.

"Well, it's a pleasure to meet you Hana."
Mr. Lee said.

"And you must be his father? He talks about you a lot."
My people-pleaser side kicked in, trying to keep the conversation light, and I hoped it didn't come off as forced.

"Only the good things, I hope," he replied, chuckling as he clapped Minho on the shoulder.
"I'm proud of this one."

How lovely.

How I wish that was my father.

I'm so mean to be envious of someone who has a good relationship with their parents.

Minho rolled his eyes, but I could see the warmth in his gaze as he looked at his dad.
"Dad, you're embarrassing me,"
 he muttered, but there was no real annoyance in his tone, instead he chuckled.

"Only the truth."
His dad playfully slapped Minho's back, laughter dancing in his eyes.

"How rude of me! Come in, let's talk over dinner,"
Mrs. Lee said, gesturing me to follow her inside.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Mrs. Lee began to serve the food, her movements graceful and efficient.
"Hana, I hope you're hungry! 

"But you dint have to do all this, I love whatever you make, it's always so delicious."
 I said, glancing at the spread of Dumplings, kimchi, and Stir-fried noodles and a couple others that I couldn't name.

"Oh, you're too kind!"
she replied, her eyes twinkling with delight.

"Go ahead dig in."
Minho ushered me.

"It's okay, I can wait until everyone's served," I said, signaling that I wouldn't be comfortable with the attention I would get while they waited for my reaction. I felt a knot tightening in my stomach at the thought of their apparent eyes on me, scrutinizing my every bite.

Mrs. Lee exchanged a knowing look with Minho, who nodded slightly, understanding my discomfort. "Alright, we'll all eat together," he said, taking a seat and filling his own plate.

As we settled into our meal, the atmosphere lightened, and conversation flowed around the table. I focused on my food, savoring the flavors while stealing glances at the family dynamics unfolding before me. Minho's laughter echoed, and I felt a bittersweet longing for that connection.

"So Hana, Minho tells us you're still studying."

"Ah yes, yes I am. I'm still in Med-school, 3rd Year."

"Oh I dint know Minho had such a genius roommate."

"It's not like that- at all."
I sheepishly answered.

"Come on Hana, you're so humble. You look like a bright student."

 Minho chimed in, shooting me an encouraging look.
"You really work hard."

. "Thanks, Minho," I replied, my voice a touch softer.

"That's actually impressive." Mr. Lee said, genuinely interested.
"It takes a lot of dedication. You'll make a wonderful doctor."

I smiled, but inside, I wrestled with the familiar feeling of inadequacy. I wanted to believe their praise, to feel worthy of it. I could feel the anxiety rouse within me, my leg bobbed up and down.

"She is, she's brilliant, she works really hard."
Minho looked at me as his hand crept to my knee, holding it steady.

The weight of his touch was both comforting and startling. I met his gaze, and for a moment, the noise around us faded. In that small act, he communicated more than words ever could.

"The food's amazing by the way Mrs. Lee, thank you for preparing so much."

"Please, call me Mom," she said with a warm smile.

My eyes shot wide open at her words.
"Mom?"
But the word was bitter on my tongue.

"Mom!" Minho teased, a playful glint in his eyes. "You're going to confuse her."

I managed a shy smile, my gaze flicking between Minho and his mother. 
"Okay, Mom it is."

Mrs. Lee laughed lightly, the sound soothing.
"Eat well, okay? Don't be shy, think of it as your own place."

"What's your subject in med school?"
Mr. Lee asked, genuinely interested.

"I take Gyn-OB surgery, and then some compulsory subjects like General Medicine and General Surgery. I used to take Human Anatomy for the first two years, but I dropped it this year since I dint require it anymore. "

"That's impressive!" Mr. Lee exclaimed.
"It takes a lot of dedication. You'll make a wonderful doctor."

I smiled, but a familiar knot tightened in my stomach. I wanted to believe him, to feel worthy of that praise. But the weight of expectations loomed over me like a storm cloud.

As we continued our meal, I focused on my food, savoring the flavors while stealing glances at Minho, who was laughing and joking with his parents.

As we wrapped up dinner, the laughter and conversation flowed around the table, filling the space with a warmth I hadn't anticipated. I was slowly starting to feel like I belonged, even if it scared me.

"Okay, who's ready for dessert?"
Mrs. Lee announced, beaming as she brought out a platter of fruits.

I watched her bustle around with a sense of awe. This was a family that cared, and the realization sent a mix of warmth and ache through me.

"Can I help serve?"
I offered, wanting to contribute something to this beautiful moment.

"Oh, you're so sweet! Yes, please!"
 Mrs. Lee replied, her eyes lighting up.

"So what do you do in your free time?"
She asked as she placed 4 mason jars on the table.

"Good question, I don't have free time actually. I just... study."

"Ah yes, Minho told us. He said you're often busy to go out."

"So he's mentioned me?"

"Just yesterday, he never told us he had a roommate."

"He told me that too."

I rolled up my sleeves as I was distracted and clearly not thinking straight to pour out the rice punch that she prepared.

"Oh my, Hana dear are you okay?"

I paused, the rice punch almost spilling from the jar as I fumbled, my heart racing at Mrs. Lee's concern. "I'm fine, really!" I assured her, trying to brush off the momentary panic.
"I got hurt at work is all."

"Are you sure dear?"
She said tracing patterns on my forearm.

"Yes... Mom? I'm okay"
I even flashed her a smile.

"You know Hana, if there's anything you want, you can always come here, come to me, or Minho. He's a good kid, he might act stupid or indifferent, but that's not what's on the inside. He has a very warm heart."

"Trust me, I know. He's a great friend."

As we finished pouring the rice punch, Minho rejoined us, his usual playful demeanor shining through. "What's the secret over here?" he teased, raising an eyebrow at the two of us.

"Just girl talk," I replied, trying to keep the mood light.
"I'm sick of being around three guys."

"Oh really? You can't even cook a proper meal, how would you live without me?"

Mrs. Lee chuckled, shaking her head.
"Modesty is not his strong suit, I'm afraid."

"But Hana really can't cook, she once-"
 Hana put her hand over my mouth and cut me off.

"Don't you dare."

He stuck out his tongue at me like it was the most offensive thing to me, so I did just that.

"You both are grown people, still acting children"
She hit us playfully.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Minho POV:

"Mom, I think we should get going, it's almost 11pm."

"Oh do you have to go training early?"
My mom asked me.

"Yeah, and Hana has to go to university too."

"Yeah, gotta do that too."
Hana replied.

"Well in that case, I can't keep you guys here any longer,"
My mom replied sadly.

Dad had passed out on the la-zy-boy sometime during the conversations we were having.

"Bye Mom see you soon."
I said grabbing my keys from the key holder.

Hana was grabbing her bag and jacket and stopped to say bye to my mom just before leaving.

"You're such a nice child, and really pretty too,"
To which she turned strawberry-red. I wish I could take a picture of her like that.
"Take care okay? and remember what I told you, you're always welcome here."
And with that she hugged her, and the way her stiff body melted, I realized how bad it was.

"Thank you Mom, I'll see you again, very soon."

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

We walked to the car, in silence. Hana's gaze remained unfocussed from the time we left the door. She was walking subconsciously, I knew for a fact she dint know where she was heading.

"Hana" I started, breaking the quiet.
"Are you okay?"

She physically shook herself out from her thoughts and said,
"Of course why wouldn't I be ?"

"You looked sad."

She looked up, forcing a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Just a little confused, that's all."

"Why is that?"

She shrugged, her focus drifting back on the path,
"Is it my fault my parents treat me the way they do? Because, like I get it, I know I'm not their idea of an ideal child-"

I felt my stomach twist at her words, 
"There's no such thing as an ideal child. You're you and it's not your fault they have insane expectations."

"But they're right Minho, they're not wrong."

"Hana, you refuse to talk about them, you've never visited them the 5-6 months you've moved out, and the one time you did, you came home with a bruise on your face. That tells me more than enough."

"You don't know why they did what they did, So how can you say for sure?"

"Tell me so I can understand."

Her expression darkened.
"What's there to say? That I'm a disappointment? That no matter how hard I try, it's never enough? It's not their fault I can't be the student, daughter they want me to be. I can argue, be stubborn, I can lie because I don't want to listen to their criticism, I can completely fuck up my exam, be a complete loser in comparison to my parents."

"How much is too less?"

"91%"

"When was this?"

"The exam after I was sick."

"What have they done to you? You cannot possibly think this is okay. You did so well Hana, 91% is amazing. Why did you never tell me? I would have praised you, I would've been proud even."

"You're just saying this to be polite. That is the bare-minimum. You don't know my parents. They raised me for this and all I'm doing is failing their effort.
She scoffed, the bitterness cutting deep.
"It's easy for you to say. Your parents are proud of you. Mine can barely look me in the eye without disappointment."

"Hana I dint mean to bring you over to compare your parents with mine, I did this so you'd finally realize, that it's not you who's always at fault. Whatever you're saying right now, they aren't your words, they're your parent's, and forgive me if I'm wrong, but I'm only saying this because I know I'm right."

"Hana..." I reached out, wanting to bridge that gap between us, but she flinched away.

"Don't," she whispered, her voice trembling.
"I don't know what you want me to do about it. I can't leave them, they dint leave me although they did threaten to, but they never did. I know they care, I just need to prove myself."

"Hana," I began, hoping my voice was softer this time. "You don't have to carry their expectations alone. You're allowed to be yourself, to not meet every standard they set."

"Do you really think that matters?" she asked, tears welling in her eyes.

I repeated myself,
"Hana, you deserve to be happy. You deserve to feel free."

"But what if I can't?"
 Her voice broke, and a single tear rolled down her cheek.
"What if I never feel good enough?

I felt a lump form in my throat.
 You're worth so much more than their approval, You're worthy of love and acceptance just as you are. You're not defined by grades or expectations."

She stared at me, the hurt in her eyes giving way to something softer—hope, maybe? But it quickly faded.

"Maybe," she whispered, wiping her tears. "But it feels impossible."

"What do you want, Hana? I mean, really want?" I pressed gently.

"I just... I want them to see me," she said, her voice cracking.
"Even if it's not their idea of who I should be. I'm always falling short. I can't remember the last time I made them proud. And I miss that validation. But to experience it again I need to meet their standards, however bizarre. I need you to understand that this is the only plan where I stay alive."

"I want what you want, and if your goal is to please them or make them proud, I, Seungmin and Jeongin will support you, but you need to let us intervene sometimes, to take you out on a walk or an ice cream break, a dinner with all four of us, a home made dinner like today. You can do all that, while you work on you goal. That's the only way its going to be healthy and helpful."

Her gaze fell, and I could see the struggle within her.

"Don't be too critical of yourself, Hana. You're smarter, stronger and more hardworking than you think. Your parents will eventually see it, I promise you."

She turned her head, finally meeting his gaze.
"And what if they don't? What if they only see the disappointment?"

"That's their problem, not yours." He took a deep breath, feeling the weight of his own words. "You deserve to live your life without that burden. You've done enough just by trying to be their version of you."

Hana looked away again, a single tear escaping down her cheek. "I'm scared, Minho."

"Scared of what?"
I asked pulling her into a hug.

"Scared of losing them, you, Seungmin and Jeongin. What if I lose you all trying to prove something I'll never achieve?"
Her voice muffled as she spoke in my shoulder.

His heart twisted at her admission.
"You won't lose me, you won't lose your friends. You don't have to prove anything to me.
Just be you, Hana. That's enough.
You're building a life outside your parents. And I promise, I won't let you fall."

She laughed, and the sound sent my heart into a flutter. I realized that amidst the weight of the moment, I'd made her smile. "Don't try to act all cool now," she teased.

"Come on, get in the car,"
I said, ruffling her hair playfully.

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

a/n: guys i know you're probably thinking,
oh! bang yedam
oh! bang chan

NO NOPE
they're not siblings

Ho(e)w long is this????

I APOLOGIZE FOR A STUNT IM GOING TO PULL IN ONE OF THE COMING CHAPTERS
FORGIVE ME (LOLOLOL)

(last pre-written chaps, I hope I'm back?)