Lily was fine. In fact, she had never been better - God knows why anyone would bother refuting her astoundingly good mental stability. No, Lily was indeed a simple girl with simple needs, and staying the hell away from any (potential) heartbreak or emotional trauma was her number one priority.

The emotional trauma in question was James Potter. Whenever he was nearby Lily Evans was not having a good time. Her constant raging battle with him seemed timeless - it seemed no matter how much he flirted she would never cave, and no matter how many times she politely declined he'd simply gain yet another ounce of confidence and perhaps even self-assurance.

No, Lily Evans was not having a good time, because that was before - all those feelings, her constant declining - that was before the summer. And now that summer was over, and Lily had, as all of her peers, made her way back to Hogwarts, something had changed. It wasn't a big deal or anything - except, maybe it was. To Lily, anyway. James either hadn't noticed or simply ignored the slight shift in where exactly Lily stood when it came to how much of an arsehole she considered the boy to be.

Lily wasn't sure whether to be overjoyed at the prospect of James having finally stopped asking her out each week nonstop, or whether to be worried. It wasn't as if she cared about him or his stupid feelings, she just felt that perhaps some of the responsibility of his mental well-being fell onto her shoulders as a prefect. Or maybe she was just that tad bit infatuated by the very notion of James-mother-flipping-Potter.

But Lily didn't actually say anything to James, of course. She merely approached one of his best mates, namely Remus Lupin. He seemed to be, in Lily's opinion, the only person in James' little friend group that lacked the 'hot-headed' feature James very proudly showed off on the Quidditch pitch. In fact, he might even be somewhat charming.

"He has seemed a bit off though, hasn't he?" Lily prompted once she'd greeted him. Remus stood rather awkwardly at 6,2, looking a bit like an oddly uncomfortable noodle. He offered Lily a confused but sympathetic smile, wringing his hands together.

"I..." said Remus, pursing his lips. "I wouldn't know really, but he's been really distracted lately. Like ... like something's on his mind. Besides you, I mean."

Lily tried very, very hard not to blush, and she felt as thought she should perhaps get a medal for the tremendous amount of effort she put into doing just that. "Oh. Well. Wait - what do you mean you wouldn't know? You live in the same dorm room, don't you?"

Remus nodded, looking like he was mulling something over, perhaps contemplating how much he dared tell her. Finally, he parted his lips ever so slightly, looking up at the ceiling. "Um ... well - he hasn't been ... in the dorm room for a good week now. It's like he disappears during the night. To be perfectly clear, I don't think he knows I know he's up to something, really. I just reckoned he'd finally snared you on his hook," Remus looked slightly apologetic as he regarded Lily turn a rather ridiculous colour of red. "I stayed up all night waiting for him last night. Dunno what he's doin', he wasn't at breakfast either. Didn't see him till second period."

Feeling a bit concerned both for Remus and his heavy bags under his eyes, and even more concerned for James, Lily thanked him for his honesty and input.

And off she went. She walked the hallways with a rather dazed expression on her face, lips pulled down in a frown. Where the hell was James Potter, anyway? She wasn't wondering this because she particularly cared or anything - he just so happened to be Gryffindors biggest-most-stuck-up-arsehole-trouble-maker there was. And as a prefect, it was Lily's duty to find out what he was up to. Who knew - he could be planning to blow up the boys' bathroom and no one would know until it happened. With this comforting thought in the back of her mind, Lily decided very quickly she better check the Gryffindor common room first.

But of course, the first time in Lily's life that she absolutely couldn't find James was the day he could genuinely be in trouble.

Sighing frustratedly, Lily headed, naturally, to the library. Maybe there'd be some book that could help her. Though, she doubted it'd be very obvious ... "boy problems and how to fucking deal with them," didn't seem like an eligible title.

Lily stormed into the library like she had a purpose there, but really she was just far too stressed and perhaps even a bit shocked at how much Hogwarts seemed to lack anything James related. He'd always been everywhere before, but now ... well, everything was indeed different. And for whatever reason, Lily didn't particularly care for this type of 'different'.

Lily let herself fall into a seat, resting her head on her arms, sighing so deeply her lungs could very well have exploded and failed to surprise her. And then it hit her: the lake.

Of-fucking-course James would be by the lake! He'd sworn since his second year at Hogwarts that he'd compete at the water sports competition only open to sixth years - and it was indeed James' and Lily's sixth year now.

"Oh, for fuck's sake," whispered Lily under her breath angrily. Her head felt as though it was boiling ... God, when she got her hands on James...

There he was, the infamous James Potter, on a twenty-foot wave made and supposedly controlled by his wand, riding it with his bare feet.

She spotted Sirius Black standing knee-deep in the lake water, urging James on.

Lily got close quickly enough, and once she did, it took James all but five seconds to spot her. He stumbled immediately, falling twenty feet down into the lake water. At first, he didn't reappear, and Lily had time to get a bit worried. Then he resurfaced near the edge of the lake, with a shit-eating grin on his face.

Lily flared her nostrils at him. Suddenly it really hit her that she had no proper reason for being there. She'd ... she'd wanted to interrogate him...? No - she wanted to know how he was doing ... or ... perhaps...

"James!" Lily shouted, even though he could very well hear her. "I need to talk to you. Alone," she added when Sirius smirked.

"Yeah. Sure," James said, still gasping for air. "What's this about?"

The late afternoon sun complimented James' brown eyes wonderfully, Lily noticed. In fact, his eyes reminded her greatly of a cappuccino -

"Lily?" said James, looking concerned.

"Sorry - I'm just tired, I get rather easily distracted when I'm tired, I'm sorry." Lily apologised.

She led him to the tree nearest to the lake's edge, leaving Sirius in the water looking somewhat abandoned.

"So..." said James, hesitant to meeting Lily's gaze.

"So..." Lily echoed. "So - this is going to sound so ridiculously strange, so I'm really, uh, sorry in advance."

James nodded, a smile ghosting his face ever so slightly.

"Okay. So. I was just a bit - I don't know - concerned about you. Remus said you've not been showing up, even after curfew and as a prefect I think it's my duty to -"

Lily was cut short as James made an undignified "pffft," noise, his lower lip between his teeth.

"What?" Lily asked, feeling offended.

"Lily Evans with her big brain can't figure out that I've been practicing for the competition at night? When no one else is there to bother me? Good lord, Lily. Thought you were some type of genius."

Lily felt hot rage boil inside her, threatening to spill over.

James asked rather slyly when Lily kept quiet, "is that really all? Is that why you came looking for me?"

"Yes," snapped Lily. "But if we're gonna mention anything besides formalities I feel obliged to ask why you aren't - obsessing over me quite as much."

James - the arsehole - went as far as to laugh, right there, in Lily's bright red face, the lake glittering in his eyes once he returned his attention to a flustered Lily.

"You kind of made it clear that I was three seconds away from being murdered in my sleep, so..." said James, grinning wildly at her.

"Knowing you'd inevitably be killed for your actions never stopped you before," Lily pointed out.

James, still grinning like a handsome fish, said, "yeah, well, Remus didn't exactly see my line of logic."

Lily held in a very passionate eye-roll, knowing James would do nothing but return the sentiment.

"Well, what's wrong then?" asked Lily, trying for a different approach.

"Nothing's wrong," said James, just a moment too fast to be believable.

Lily raised her eyebrows, crossing her arms bossily. "Listen here, James, love. I'm not exactly your number one fan, and I'm not very faint-hearted, so go ahead - my expectations of you can't exactly get much lower than they already are -"

"Okay, but it's ... it's so stupid," sighed James.

Lily, despite her reddening cheeks and sassy pose, smiled at James, comfortingly almost. "Go on."

James hesitated, eyes landing on anything but Lily. "I just wish I could be a bit more unconventional - but I'm really just like everyone else. It sort of ... hurts," James admitted.

"What, being normal hurts?" Lily laughed.

"Yeah," said James, far too serious. His gaze drifted back to the lake, perhaps watching Sirius skip rocks across the water disinterestedly. "It does. Because ... well, this is going to make me sound like a right arsehole, but -"

"I already think you are one," interjected Lily.

"Exactly, so I might as well say it anyway," said James, rubbing the back of his neck, puffing his cheeks up. After a few slow-ticking seconds, James let the air escape him and he continued. "When you believe you're ... you're special or whatever your entire life just because you achieve a bit higher than some, I mean, it leaves you kind of deflated. Once you realise you aren't any different, I mean. I don't know."

Lily stared at James in shock, all amusement brought to her by the sheer uniqueness of the situation evaporated and gone. "You ... you, James Potter, are the least worthy person of an ego boost I have ever been unfortunate enough to meet," said Lily, regarding the look of dismay on James' face. "But that's because you really are special, James. You're - you're incredible and talented and - and that's what makes it so infuriating that you harassed me all of last year. Because I - sort of enjoyed it."

"I - I - what?" James spluttered. He leaned against the tree, cheeks red, eyes darting.

"It's ridiculous, I told you," mumbled Lily.

"This's what happens when you fuck around, I guess. I'm really sorry, Lily," apologised James.

Lily met James' eyes, and to her bewilderment she saw both sincerity and sentimentality there. To think that James Potter was capable of such emotion was truly a hazardous thought.

"I - I - it's fine," Lily insisted. "But to think that you are indeed capable of regret is a very disturbing thing."

James blushed hard, floundering for something to say, eventually settling on just pulling a hand through his hair.

"But on a more serious level," said Lily. "I'm aware that you're a total jerk and you deserve nothing better than exile, and definitely not a single drop of my attention since you're a confirmed stalker and you play water sports in your free time, but -"

"Hey!" James exclaimed.

"But," continued Lily. "I suppose, if you're still into me, I'd be willing to maybe - just maybe - give you a chance."

James looked like he was simultaneously enduring a stroke, seizure and perhaps even a Confunding spell.

Lily took a nervous step forward and raised her gaze to meet James'. To her (mild but very real) surprise, James raised a shaking hand to Lily's face, and with the most tender expression on his face, he let his lips connect with her.

Lily melted into his touch; it was like she'd jumped from a plane, but had forgotten her parachute and was perhaps falling at a hundred miles per hour a short distance away from the moment her body would hit the very solid ground and go 'splat', but she didn't care at all.

Feeling James' hands pull through her hair was like the very wind whistling in her ears, blowing past her. Her blood was pumping through her at such a rapid pace she was bordering on feeling panicked, but it didn't matter because James was here underneath the oak tree and she was wrapped around him - Lily was snogging James - oh lord - she was free falling -

But then suddenly she had her parachute.

And James held her tightly, and the very ground she stood on was surely made out of clouds, and the warm sun only touching a few patches of grass around her due to the oak tree's shade looked almost ethereal in the summer afternoon.

And for once in Lily Evan's life, she felt truly satisfied.

-

Well, my loves, that's it, that's the whole one-shot. I love you so much you don't even understand it means so much to me that you're reading this I just

I put actual effort into this at 1:08 a.m (that's the time now!) when I could have been chatting with friends and not sobbing about Lily Evans so perhaps, if you have the time, you could just idk vote or leave a lovely lil' comment or sm

I love you xxx