Trigger Warning

When Andy wakes up, he notices that he's on the couch in Remington's house. There's a soft blanket over him and he feels strangely comfortable.

After a few minutes, he feels a slight sting in his wrist. He lifts up his sleeve and all the memories come back to him- waking up crying, relapsing with his self harm, panicking and crying when Remington asked about the blood in the bathroom sink, and Remington somehow having the patience to comfort him while he cried and broke down.

Andy has been having confusing feelings about Remington since he met him. He loves how he is always there for him and will do anything to help him. Remington was there for Andy when he needed him the most- when Ashley cheated on him. Even though Ashley cheated on him with Remington, Andy doesn't blame Remington at all for it. He knows that Rem had no idea that he and Ashley were dating. He also knows Remington never would have kissed him if he knew, or even knew that Andy had feelings for him. He knows that Remington cares about him. He proved it when he followed him out of the bar and comforted him while he cried at the park. Andy knows he has feelings for Remington. He always has. But he knows Remington would never love him back.

Andy doesn't even know why he dated Ashley. He knew Ash was a player and that he would get hurt. He knew it wasn't going to last. But he still let himself fall in love with him. Ashley made Andy believe that he loved him. Sure they had their pointless fights and Ashley sometimes got a bit too aggressive with Andy when he was angry, (hitting him, pushing him into things, there was an incident with a beer bottle once), but he always apologized and made up for it later. Yes, he still got Andy to stop self harming, but only by telling him that no one else would love someone who harms themselves. It hurt to see Ashley cheat on him. Andy has never felt loved by anyone before he started dating Ashley. Now, he's not sure if that was even what love should be. Andy realizes that he wasn't in love with Ashley. He was in love with the idea of being loved by another person, so he stayed with Ashley even though it hurt him. Ashley made Andy believe that no one else would be able to love him in the same way. Andy was so afraid of never finding love again, so he stayed.

"Oh you're awake?" Remington says as he walks into the living room, pulling Andy out of his thoughts.

Andy jumps up and pulls his sleeve back down to cover the cuts.

"Yea I'm awake." Andy says softly as he sits up on the couch, allowing Remington to sit next to him.

"You slept for almost 12 hours. How are you feeling?" Remington asks carefully.

"I guess a bit better. Thank you for helping me though. I'm sorry for putting you through all this." Andy whispers, his voice trailing off at the end.

Remington notices the sadness in Andy's voice and moves closer to him, wrapping his arm around Andy's shoulders and pulling him close. Andy sighs and rests his head on Remington's chest, feeling comforted by the warmth of Remington's arms around him, holding him and protecting him.

"Don't be sorry, Andy. You're hurt. It's okay to be upset. I'll always be here to help you through it." Remington whispers as Andy cuddles more into him, whispering a quiet thank you as he hides his face in his chest.

Remington mindlessly begins to run his hand through Andy's hair, making him snuggle even closer. Remington smiles softly at how adorable Andy is like this. Despite the pain he's in and how sad and broken he feels, Remington can't help but to think Andy looks adorable as he snuggles into his chest. Cuddling Andy and holding him makes Remington feel needed. It makes him feel like his life has a purpose. Sure, he has a purpose in the band, but it's not the same as being needed by another human being, being there to help the one he loves through hard times, taking care of someone.

Remington wouldn't change anything about this moment with Andy. What could he want to change? He's sitting on the couch with the boy he's in love with, holding him in his arms and protecting him from the demons in his head.

Remington still wants to know where the blood in the sink came from yesterday, and why Andy got so worked up when he asked about it. He wants to ask now that Andy seems a bit better, but he doesn't want to upset him. Andy looks so peaceful curled up to Remington, and he doesn't want to ruin that. He doesn't want to cause Andy any more pain than he's already in. Seeing Andy cry as hard as he did made Remington's heart break in his chest. It pains him to see Andy so upset. Sure, he's seen him cry when they were on tour together, before Ashley cheated on him, and it broke Remington's heart. But the amount of pain Andy was in yesterday and when he saw Ashley cheat on him was the most heartbreaking thing Remington had ever seen.

"Remi?" Andy whispers softly, pulling Remington from his thoughts.

"Yea Ands?" Remington whispers back.

"I don't think Ashley ever really loved me the way that I loved him." Andy says sadly.

"What makes you say that?" Remington asks in a caring voice.

"A lot of things... he never wanted anyone to know we were together, so he made me hide it even though it hurt me. He never let me hug him or show any affection in public, but he still kissed another man in public.... when we would argue, he got violent with me. He'd hit me and push me and if I cried he slap me across the face. But then he'd tell me he loves me and would cuddle with me. He told me that no one would ever love me like he does...." Andy says, his voice cracking in some places.

Remington is about to speak, but is cut off by Andy.

"Remember when I came to your bus crying at 2am and told you the hate online had gotten to me?" Andy asks.

"Yea...?"

"It wasn't the hate online that made me so upset. Well, it was part of it, but the main reason I was upset was because Ashley told me that the hate was proof that I'd never be loved by anyone but him." Andy whispers, holding back tears.

"Andy, that's abuse. That's really serious. Why didn't you tell someone?" Remington asks as he looks Andy in his watery eyes, his concern growing more and more.

"He told me that if I told anyone, he'd leave me and I'd never be loved by anyone again. All I wanted was to be loved." Andy says, his voice trailing off as a few tears slowly fall down his cheeks.

"Andy....come here." Remington whispers as he pulls Andy into his lap and hugs him tight.

Andy melts into the hug and rests his head on Remington's shoulder with his face in his neck, crying silently. It hurt Andy so much to say all that out loud.

"I'm so sorry you had to go through all that. You deserve nothing but all the love anyone could possibly give you. I promise one day you'll find someone who will make you feel so fucking loved." Remington whispers.

It's hard for Remington to say all that when he loves Andy with everything he has in him, but he knows Andy will never love him back.