Word Count: 459

Rated: PG-13

Description: It's been 4 years since Yuuri death and Viktor still misses him

      The vast amount of extra space in this house was a burden. The lack of love I've been receiving injuries my heart. I've been making an effort of replacing you with someone as elegant as you are. I've tried to cover my wounds of my aching chest when I finally realized today there is no one out there like you Yuuri.

Only in my dreams was when I saw you. That was where I heard your heartwarming giggles, felt the soft kisses, and your glossy Japanese eyes. We'd chat for a moment until my alarm had woken me. Through my dreams, I have revisited older memories as well. Recalling the way how our lips melted into one for the very first time. They connected as puzzles ever since that day. Or how your shy eyes avert mines whenever we had the house to ourselves. Those soft memories demolished me.
Many have scolded me for these actions. For gathering the pleasant moments we both once had. Especially Yurio. He continually nags how much I miss your appearance in this house. Yet, through the criticizing and his chiding, I saw the sympathy in his soul. He must've missed you as well Yuuri. 

But never as much as I will ever. 

I've lost track of time after you died, I've been too busy grieving you. But you were young, too young for such a tragic thing to occur to you. I'm still holding the guilt inside of me with my engaged ring on my fingers. It lost its golden shine after you left. Now it's the rusty and wet from all the tears. Your ring is secured with me, buried in the depth of my pockets is where it's been for 4 years. 

Laying in the grubby scattered sheet of my bed is where I conceive of you. Day and Night. Hugging my sick and old Makkachin around my arms I fall asleep. I never touch your side of the bed, afraid that'll lose your spirit. It's been untouched for 4 years. Guilt builds higher as I think if Makkachin ever wonders where you've been. The poor old poodle is just a dog with no sentimental feelings to develop, unlike a human. His fur has been fading away as the days go by, terrified of losing him too. 

Whether you're watching me or hearing my prayers, I love you. And will always love you no matter what happens. Even if our plan of having a family together is incomplete, I'll love you forever. As your coach, I have been afraid of losing someone, afraid of losing you. But never your love. For our love is permanent~