You're Such a Fatass

So I decided to write a multi-fic story! I literally got inspiration for this walking up the stairs at school... So I hope you guys enjoy it! As everyone knows, I am not Isayama.. If I was, Petra would be alive and Rivetra would be canon. Dedicated to iConfused once again! Just cuz cx

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"Levi! Get your fat ass up and get another job or something! You can't just sit here moping around in piles of food!" Hanji gestured to the huge bag of potato chips that was now empty.

Levi had lost his job about 2 weeks ago. Ever since, he has became a lazy eating machine. He had lost his house and has been crashing at Hanji's house, much to her annoyance. She didn't mind it at first, but then he started eating all her food and not even looking for a job. He moved his head to the side so he could see the T.V.

"I don't need to get a job." Levi took a potato chip and put it in his mouth, chewing with his mouth open.

"Fine, but you are going to a gym. How much weight have you gained since moving in with me and Erwin?"

"That doesn't mean any-"

"How much weight have you gained?" Hanji asked more sternly.

"22 pounds." Levi grabbed a potato chip, but before he could eat it, Hanji slapped the chip out of his hand and snatched the bag. She then grabbed the remote and clicked the television off.

"You're going to the gym, and getting a personal trainer to get you back in shape! I mean look at you!" Hanji lifted up his shirt. "You've lost all your muscles! I'm calling the gym right now!" Hanji let go of his shirt and grabbed her iPhone 5S out of her back pocket. She unlocked her phone and started tapping buttons before putting the phone up to her ear.

"Hello, I'd like to sign someone up for a personal trainer... Levi Ackerman... 28... I need the toughest trainer you've got... One minute, let me get a pen and paper." Hanji walked into the kitchen and grabbed a pen and a notebook. She randomly flipped it open to a blank page. "Okay so what were the dates and times?... Uh huh..." Hanji started scratching words on the paper. "Uh huh... All right! Thanks!" She pressed the end call button and slid her phone back in her pocket.

Levi stood up to look at the things Hanji had wrote down on the piece of paper. "Did you seriously just get me a personal trainer?"

"Yes, your first appointment is tomorrow at 7:45 A.M. with Miss Ral."

"Great." Levi fell back onto the couch. "You probably got me some fucking bodybuilding 40 year old lady."

"It doesn't matter! You are going to get back in shape! I don't care if I got you a grandma as a trainer, you are going! Now go to bed!"

"It's 4 in the afternoon and you're not my mother."

"My house, my rules, got to bed!"

"Okay, mom." Levi stood up and started walking to the guest room.

"Don't you sass me!"

"Fuck off." Levi entered the room and slammed the door behind him.

~~~~~~

"RING RING RING! RISE AND SHINE! TAKE A SHOWER AND GET TO THE MESS HALL!" Hanji yelled into a mega-phone that she may or may not have stolen from the construction workers down the road. She yanked the curtains open and ripped the blankets off of Levi.

Levi groaned in annoyance. "What the fuck, shitty glasses. It's" Levi grabbed his iPhone 4S and turned on the screen. "7 A.M? Fuck!" Levi shoved his face into his pillow.

Hanji placed the end of the mega-phone right next to Levi's right ear. "WAKE UP PRINCESS! THERE AIN'T NO TIME FOR BEAUTY SLEEP!"

"Fuck! Get out! I'm up!" Levi stood up and started pushing Hanji out of his room.

About 20 minutes later, Levi came out of the bathroom in sweats and dripping wet hair. He sat at the table with his same bored expression as always.

"THERE SHE IS!" Hanji yelled.

"He."

"You're a "she" now! Come on! Breakfast is ready!" Hanji placed an extremely burnt pancake, if you could even call it that, on his plate.

Levi poked the pancake with his fork, causing it to explode, and Levi, already used to her food exploding, didn't even flinch. "I'll McDonalds on my way there." Levi pushed his plate away from himself and stood up.

"No! You're trainer called and gave me a list of things you can and can't eat and McDonald's is one of the things you can't eat!"

"Seriously? Are you fucking kidding me? Now this lady is controlling what I eat? Fuck this shit!"

"You have to go! Come on! Oh and you can't bring a car, you have to run there and you better hurry, you only have 20 minutes." Hanji pointed to the clock.

"Fuck that. I'm going to drive if I want." Levi pulled his tennis shoes on his feet and grabbed the car keys before exiting the house and slamming the door behind him.

Levi opened the driver's door of his red Chevy Cruze and getting in. He jammed the key in the ignition switch and turned the car on. He then shifted the car in reverse and backed out of the driveway; switching the gear back into drive as he got on the road. He drove down the road, oblivious to the speed limit, and headed to the gym, only a 3 minute drive from Hanji's house. He flipped through radio stations, only to hear a bunch of rap songs sung by artist who "can't rap worth a shit", and pop songs sung by "shitty 12 year old brats". He eventually got tired of the radio and turned it off. He came upon the gym and turned into the driveway. He found the parking spot closest to the entrance and parked there, actually taking up 2 spots like the asshole he is. He pulled the key out of the ignition, turning off the car. He then opened the car door, and stepped out, slamming the door violently before walking towards the gym doors.

As he entered, he was greeted by people who were way too friendly for his taste. He walked up to the counter. "I'm here for that personal trainer thing."

"Name please?" The obviously bored black-haired girl behind the counter asked, her name tag reading, Mikasa.

"Levi Ackerman."

Mikasa looked at the computer, typing some stuff in, and then looked back him once more before turning back to the computer. "You're 28? You look like you're 10." She examined him. "I can see why you need a personal trainer. She'll be out in a minute, you're 15 minutes early so she's with another trainee right now. Go sit down or something."

"Tch. Brat." Levi muttered as he walked to the chair against the wall. He pulled out his phone and opened Facebook.

He apparently was scrolling for a long time because the girl at the counter called him.

"Yo, midget! Petra's waiting for you. Better hurry your ass up. She's by the treadmills. She's got like auburn hair and eyes, bit shorter than you." She pointed over to one side of the gym. Levi just shoved his phone in his sweatpants pocket, and started walking in that direction

Levi kept walking, waiting to see a really tough man-woman, only to come across a petite girl. "Really? You're my "tough trainer"?"

"You drove here?" She asked.

"Ye-"

"Start running now." She pointed to the treadmill.

"Are you se-"

"Run! Now!"

Levi stepped up on the treadmill, turning it on. The speed was currently 2.5 mph at a level 0 incline.

Petra hopped up on the front of the treadmill on the plastic part, looking at his speed. "Really? Nice try." She pressed the button to increase the speed to 6 mph. She then changed the incline to level 9.

Levi matched the speed for literally 10 seconds before his breath became ragged.

Petra saw this and boosted the incline to 10 and the speed to 7 mph.

"Fuck... You..." Levi said through short breaths as he tried to keep up with the speed, but to no avail. He eventually tripped on his own feet and fell on the treadmill and it kept going, making him roll off of it.

Petra couldn't help but laugh. Levi heard her laughing and glared at her with his most menacing glare; however it did not affect her in any way. "Get up. You still have 3 miles to run."

Levi breathed heavily as he stood up. "I quit."

Petra let out a sigh before smirking. "You can't quit."

"And why the fuck not?"

"Sure, but you're going home without a car." Petra held up a pair of keys. His keys.

"How the fuck did you get those?"

"They fell out of your pocket when you so hilariously fell; as well as your phone." She held up his phone with a triumphant grin on her face.

"That's stealing."

"Technically it's not stealing if you are aware I have it and right now, we're considering it: me holding onto it to keep you from breaking or damaging the equipment or your possessions."

"Way to get technical."

"Come on. Back up there and start running."

"Fuck that. Give me my keys and my phone."

"I will once we're done with training! Now get up there and finish your 3 miles! We wouldn't have had to do this is if you would have just ran here instead of driving like a lazy bastard."

"Fine."

~~~

Twenty Minutes Later

~~~

"Come on! It's only 250 pounds! Lift!" Petra clapped.

"I. Am."

"That is not lifting. That's barely moving it! Come on lift!"

Levi managed to lift it, but no higher than his knees before dropping it.

Petra sighed in disappointment. "Come on. You're not leaving here until you lift that above your head."

"I'm fucking trying!"

"Try harder!"

Levi continued to try and try to lift it, but his 2 weeks of being a couch potato and lifting nothing heavier than a 2 liter pop has made his arms weak.

"You can do it! Come on!" Petra encouraged.

Levi continued to attempt to lift the weight, still to no avail.

"Stop." Petra held her hand up, signaling him to stop. "We'll try again tomorrow. For now let's just work on abs." She started walking over to the ab workouts and gestured him to follow.

Levi dropped the weight and started to follow her. He looked back at the weight and he felt... Ashamed. He felt ashamed of himself, and he also felt like he let her down. And for some reason, that bothered him.

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