A/N: HI IM NOT DEAD, BUT IM SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG TO UPDATE. lolol, or maybe I was dead, who knows~? So here's a super late update, featuring the winner for the poll I asked you guys to take! The second placer to that poll is the next chapter which I'm working on, so have fun with that! If you wanna hear more of my ramblings and commentary, read the a/n at the end of this~ (also if this story feels disjointed or otherwise weird in some way, I apologize. Writing has been...unusually hard for me lately)

Half a year since that questionably fateful Akihabara trip, you and Riko have only grown closer, especially with how protective she's been of you.

It was nice, knowing that someone cared about you to such an extent, but at the same time it made you feel somewhat insecure.

You found yourself thinking things like,

"Does she really love me?"
"She's too perfect for me, maybe it's pity..."
"Is it a bad prank?"
"I'm not worthy...why did she even chose me?"

With the years of abuse you've endured you weren't surprised that you found your thoughts to be so dark and negative. You haven't talked to Riko about it though, in fear that your depreciating thoughts might turn out true. In fact you've been a little cold to her as of late thanks to those invading thoughts.

Speaking of Riko, you watch as she opens the door to the music room where you've been waiting for her, her dark red hair swishing along behind her. She walks gracefully towards you, her face lighting up when her eyes meet yours.

"Hey. Were you waiting long?"

You shake your head, a small smile painting itself on your face at the natural warmth that surrounded her words.

You move over to one side, giving your girlfriend space to sit on the piano bench you're seated on.

As she gracefully sits besides you, her hands lift the lid covering the piano keys. She sits and stares at them for a moment before sighing and resting her head on your shoulder. Her body relaxes as a blush colors your face.

"R-Riko-chan?"

"Sorry, I haven't been feeling well all day..."

Immediately concerned, you shift slightly and raise a hand to her forehead, "...You're kinda warm...why don't we go to the nurse's office. You should lie down on the beds there."

She lifts her head from your shoulder and nods, closing the lid to the piano, "Okay..."

She stands to walk and you follow her, worry filling your thoughts. Seemingly fine, you watch her from your peripheral as you both exit the room and enter the hallway.

She starts to wobble and tries to lean towards the wall for support. Unfortunately you're between her and the wall, and you're unsure whether she forgot that or if she doesn't care at this point, and so she ends up pinning you to the wall, her body flushed against yours.

"R-riko-chan?! Uh--"

"Sorry, (Y/n)-chan..." she tries to push herself up and fails, causing her to lean against you even more, "I-I..."

Her breathing grows heavier and you can feel the heat radiating off of her at this point. Fighting through your embarrassment, you move and make her lean against the wall. You then crouch down, your back facing her and arms outstretched behind you.

"Get o-on, Riko-chan." She looks down at you confused. Sensing this, you elaborate, "You're obviously in no condition to walk, and well, I'm not strong enough to just sweep you off your feet, so well...You'll have to settle for this, I-I guess."

She hesitates, "But...your bruises...a-and anyways, you don't have to carry me, I'm sure I'm too heavy, and...and--"

You turn to look at her, your eyes containing a certain resolute glint as you interrupt her, "Please, Riko-chan..."

The dark haired girl hesitates for another second before complying, arms wrapping around your neck as she buries her face in your back. You move your arms to wrap around her legs, adjusting so you're able to comfortably carry her. Once you stand, you begin to once again make your way to the nurse's office.

xXx

(Y/n)-chan smells really good, and she's so warm...

...I start to wonder if I was sicker than I thought as my thoughts somehow all focus on the girl carrying me to the nurse. I buried my head deeper into her back in embarrassment as my arms grip a little tighter around her neck.

"We're here, Riko-chan. I'll lay you on the bed, okay?" Being in no state to argue otherwise, I merely nod.

She lays me down carefully, a gentleness about her that I've come to be familiar with. These past few months I've been thinking of ways to help her with her situation, as well as letting her stay over anytime she needs to. She's still a little hesitant to open up to me about the abuse she's endured, but I knew from the beginning the process wouldn't be easy, so I've tried my best to be patient and understanding with her.

"Riko-chan, here."

On her outstretched palm was a pill, a bottle of water in her other hand. I smile, looking into her (e/c) eyes. She's too sweet.

"Thank you, (Y/n)-chan." I grab the pill and swallow it as she hands me the bottle of water. As I'm drinking, she takes a seat down on a chair near me, her expression contemplative and somewhat melancholic.

"Are you worried about me?"

She looks at me and smiles sheepishly, "...Yeah, kinda."

"Don't worry. I'll be fine soon, especially since you gave me some medicine." I smile at her as she only stares back before looking away. With a slight frown, I move to rest my hand on hers.

Lately she's been more distant and withdrawn, and I can't help but wonder whether or not I've done something wrong. And when she seems to push me away like this, I wonder if she still feels the same way...Although I understand she's still going through a tough time....

"Y-you should probably sleep, Riko-chan. You're kinda sick after all..." she turns to me and gently insists I lay down.

Whether it's because she's mentioned it or because the medicine has made me drowsy, I lay back as my eyes slowly drift close, a mumbled 'okay' managing to escape between my lips as the emptiness of sleep overtakes me.

xXx

Around half an hour or so later, you're staring at your sleeping girlfriend, your thoughts consuming you as they spiral in a depressing circle. Seeing how peaceful she looks, you can't help but turn away.

You feel so undeserving of the kind understanding that Riko has shown you and your thoughts have done nothing but confirm that and other negative thoughts, so much so that your eyes have grown watery.

"Mnn..." Riko suddenly stirs and opens her amber eyes, "(Y/n)...chan? Are you alright?"

Quickly hiding your face, you rub at your eyes in an attempt to erase any evidence of tears being present, "I-I'm fine, Riko-chan..."

You don't see her frown as she sits up, a hand reaching out and touching your knee.

"You know you can tell me if something's wrong..."

You quickly shake your head, not saying anything. You can feel your emotions have reached their boiling point from keeping it in these past few days and you're afraid of what you'll say.

Wanting nothing more than to try and help you, Riko moves to sit on the edge of the bed, trying to get closer to you as her hand on your knee moves to cup your face, "...I just want you to know I'm here for you, okay?"

Maybe it's the way she said it, or maybe it's that look in her eye that seems so sincere. Maybe it's even the gentle, reassuring way her hand rests against your face. Either way, it seems your metaphorical bottle has now overflowed.

"H-h-how could you even like someone like me...?!" Your sudden outburst surprising your girlfriend, "You're so...so perfect, and kind, and just, everything I'm not and I...I can't help but feel like, I don't know...I just feel like you could do better than me, and maybe it's pity or something that's keeping you with me..."

Tears stream down your face as Riko stares at you for a few seconds. When she suddenly pulls you into a hug, the warmth you've become familiar with these past few months nearly cause you to uncontrollably start bawling.

"You're important to me, (Y/n). That's why I'm still here by your side."

Your eyes widen at her simple words. She begins to run a hand through your hair as she continues speaking, "I'm here because I want to be. Not because of pity or anything like that. I'm not here because I think that I can 'fix' your problems. You don't need fixing when you're fine the way you are. You went through some horrible things and I know that getting through that will take time, and I don't expect you to change for me. But I will stay here by your side as best as I can, okay?"

Clutching the girl tighter, you pull her closer to you as you nod, your eyes closing as you wonder how you were so lucky to find someone as compassionate as your girlfriend is.

"Th-thank you...." you manage to choke out as she continues to run a hand through your hair in an attempt to calm you.

"...You know," Riko turned to look at you, a gentle, understanding smile on her face, "someone once told me that the stars in the sky are kinda like the scars of the universe."

Seeing the confusion on your face, she turns away and looks up, continuing, "It makes sense, kinda, when you think about it. Stars are born after going through a lot of pressure. So much pressure that they expand and essentially explode, in a way. When you think about it like that, you could say that stars are like scars since they leave a relatively permanent mark. And yet we believe stars to be beautiful."

Not knowing what to say, you continue to stare at her. When she turns to look at you, as though sensing your lack of understand, she says, "If stars are scars and we still find them beautiful, how could you find your own scars to be anything but beautiful?"

Your eyes widen as a faint blush colors your cheeks, "R-riko..."

She grabs both of your hands and holds them close to her, "No matter the scars you have, they have helped shape you as you are now. And while I don't believe you deserved what you went through to get those scars, they're proof that you've survived, one way or another."

You feel your eyes tear up at her words, a choked sob making its way out of your throat as your hands clench around her soft hands in an attempt to stop yourself from crying.

She then pulls you in for a hug, gently running her hands along your (h/l) hair to calm you down. You lean into her warmth, a few tears making their way down your face as you wrap your arms around the lean girl.

"It's probably too early to be saying this, but...I love you, (Y/n). Just, give me one more year. Once we graduate, I promise I'll have a way out for you." She turns her head, a warmth spreading on her face that you can feel is reaching her neck, "I-ideally we'll be living together, b-but there's some details we'll need to wo-work through..."

You hug her tighter, wondering how you managed to get so lucky, "I'd love to live with you, and um..." a blush spreads across your face, "I-I love you too..."

Despite her blush you watch as she smiles brightly, placing a kiss on your forehead before she leans her forehead against yours. You smile at her, two words forming themselves at the edge of your tongue.

"Thank you."

A/N: well hello~ thanks for making it all the way down here and bothering to read this! tbh I just wanted to thank you guys for like, reading these updates/posts/things I put out? Because it still feels weird to know you guys like my stuff enough to not only read through them, but to even comment or star/like or even follow me or the book! So yeah, thanks so so much for all that!

If you do follow me, then you know I at one point, asked what I should do if I reach 100 followers since I'm at like, 95 last I checked and someone (very kindly, I might add) said I didn't need to do anything while another person asked for a face reveal. I figured I'd open up the question to you guys, just because. And besides, I was thinking of doing something to celebrate having over 50K reads anyways, so why not?

Personally, a face reveal isn't something I want to do because you guys don't need to be scarred with my hideous mugshot of a face, but also because I think there's more interesting things I could do, like, idk, an author question and answer thing?? Idk a face reveal just sounds kinda meh to me...and I mean, even if a face reveal is the most popular option I'll probably only show part of my face...but well, let me know I guess and maybe I'll make a poll...??? Oh, but if you follow me on twitter, my profile pic has my face...like...part of it. Like, my eye...since the rest of my face is covered lol. Idk if I'll have changed it by the time you read this though. At any rate, feel free to shoot ideas into the comments or on my profile~