When Tasha awoke from the dream, she felt more miserable than before. Not because she didn't enjoy the dream... she did, but she was miserable because she longed for that dream to be reality. She wanted everything to be different with Loki. She didn't want to push him away, but she couldn't trust his words. Only actions could he prove himself with.

Tasha moved so she could look at Loki, who was still sleeping like a babe. Rarely was he ever as calm as he seemed when he slept. It reminded her how happy she was whenever she would wake next to him. It wasn't usual that she would wake before him, but in their long life together she cherished every precious moment with her love.

She wanted desperately to believe Loki could change. Maybe it was an abusive cycle that she was destined to drown in for eternity, but she couldn't let him go. As hard as she tried, she found herself wrapped up in the memories and the feelings he made her feel without even trying. All he had to do was be there and her knees would go weak.

Tasha was stubborn, however — even more stubborn than Loki in many ways, and as such she refused to make it easy for him. After everything he had done, she refused to let everything go back to the way they were after such a short period of time... but she would allow herself to be happy, if only for a moment.

"Staring is rude, darling."

Tasha was brought from her thoughts as Loki stirred slightly, opening his eyes to look at her. She gently trailed her fingers along his chest, smiling softly at him. "I guess I'll just get up then."

Loki shook his head, his hair falling back as his hands moved to her waist. "No."

She giggled when Loki pulled her against him, her head laying against his chest as she listened to his heartbeat. "I forgot how cold you were."

Loki was about to remove his hands from her waist, but before he could she moved her hands to hold his in place. "I didn't say I didn't like it."

Loki relaxed then, taking a deep breath. "Do you? Like it, I mean."

Tasha let out a chuckle. "Yeah. I thought it was obvious. You may hate who you are, Loki — but I happen to have adored you. Every aspect of you — even the evil." She said dramatically, shaking her head against his chest.

"I'm sorry for everything I've put you through." Loki said as he held her tighter. "You deserve much more than what I could ever offer you."

"I didn't want more." Tasha said as she sat up, looking down at him sadly. "I wanted you. I loved you. You drove me away every time I thought things would be different..."

"I'm sorry." Loki said again, reaching up to caress her cheek. "But I vow to you, I will not let that happen again. You are my priority."

Tasha smiled, her eyes glistening for a moment before she moved away from him to sit on the edge of the bed. "I remember when you first broke my heart. You tried to kill Thor. And I— Anyone who said you were a monster, I fought for you saying you weren't. That— that you would change... When everything began in New York — I went against every fibre of my being to be with you. I — I killed innocent people for you. I did so many things that I never would've imagined I'd do — because I loved you so much that I was blind to the horror you were enacting to a planet that we are sworn to protect...

When we came home, I didn't think I could forgive you... Not after you used the teseract on me. You made me relive every darkest memory I had to that point — and you didn't even blink. You didn't fight for me — you didn't fight to be with me. You just gave up. You were cruel to father and even mother. And to me. I would go to you and you would scream at me and force me to leave. Do you have any ideas how many times I cried for you? Even after everything you did in New York, I forgave you! Even after you pushed me away, once again I forgave you!

But I can't forgive you for this. You have crossed so many lines but this — this broke whatever trust I had left in you and I don't know if I'll ever be able to trust you, Loki... You have destroyed nearly everything good in me — I won't be that stupid little girl again. I can't. I won't."

"Tasha—"

"I want to turn it all off." Tasha said with a laugh. "I just want it to be over. All the suffering and pain I've endured... I just want it gone. I want to forget all of it...

But I can't."

Loki was taken aback by her words.

"I can't lose the way I feel about you. And that goes against everything I just said and what I want — because we're bonded, Loki. Not only that, but we are soulmates. We crave to be with each other in a way no one else could even begin to imagine. That hasn't gone away, even if you think it has...

Maybe I'm just stupid." She chuckled sadly as she looked up at him. "But I still see the good in you. I still see the man I fell in love with all those years ago — the man who never would have hurt me... It's up to you whether you give up on yourself, or if you'll fight for us... for me..."

She stood, walking towards the door. She paused when Loki spoke quietly.

"Why do you? After everything I've done, how can you still believe in me?"

"I have hope."

•••

HEY! Please comment any and all ideas you have for Tasha x Loki!!! I need all the help 😭😭😭😭😭 please any ideas for past, future or present storylines are needed! :) fluff, angst, smut etc any ideas are appreciated