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I've been trying so hard for so long. Why can I not shake this feeling? Why can't I ignore this? Why can't I? I've been dealing with this for a month now. Why can't I do this?
"Hey Kevin," A voice jolted me awake from my thoughts, it was Lucy, she was my best friend. "How ya doing?"
"I'm okay I guess." I replied, I really wasn't but I couldn't let her know.
"You seem stressed." She replied, concerned.
"Yeah, well finals are approaching, and I have so many projects to work on, and half of them are group projects, and you know that struggle." This was all true, but it wasn't the real reason why I was off. I was in love with her.
"I can relate," She replied. "I'll see you after A4." We have a block schedule with A-days and B-days, luckily there are only 4 blocks in a day. We're heading into A2, for me that means engineering.
I zoned out for most of engineering, she was just talking about gear rations. All I could think about was Lucy. She was your typical girl, blonde hair, blue eyes, nice, sweet, and just overall perfect. The only probably is, we've been friends for a long while, and a few months ago Hufsa decided to make some drama of it. She had been spreading rumors of how I like Lucy, though I never liked her. Well, I never did up until about a month ago, though, now she's dating Kyle, so I don't have much of a shot anymore.
These days, Lucy is always talking about Kyle, all the "stupid" things he's doing. I just have to laugh at them, no matter how much it hurts. Often Kyle won't respond to her texts after 5 because of his family struggles, so Lucy often only talks to me then. Lucy often complains about how he's not responding, and how she thinks she's not doing something right, I've been supporting her, telling her how well she's doing, I'm the only one who has been, even though this past month, it's been hell to try to and help her.
"Kevin, what is the gear ratio of this problem?" Mrs. Edwards asked me, jolting me back to the present once more. The day continued like this, me zoning out and someone talking to me, jolting me to the now.
A4 finally rolled around, it was English, my least favorite subject. Though Lucy made it better, we sat next to each other, and she typically drew animated tacos on my notebook to keep us occupied. It's the little things like that, in which she makes me love her even more. Kyle's a really lucky guy, I mean he can't see everything I see, but what is underneath her smooth front she puts up is worth so much more.
I think I could get over the fact that Lucy has Kyle instead of me. No, I can get over it. I can, and I will.
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