Song: "Carousel" by Kate Voegele

**

The following Thursday, Heather went to school without makeup on. She hardly did anything with her hair except brush it. She felt like a different person. She hadn't been to school for the whole week and did none of her homework. She told her mom about Chandler, and the only thing she had to say about it was, "maybe you should've looked more like the other girl."

Courtney picked her up because she felt sorry for her, and she offered to pick her up for the rest of next week, but Heather declined. Seeing Courtney and Duncan smiling and laughing together on the way to school made her sad. And it dawned on her that that was how it was going to be for a while. When Courtney pulled into the school parking lot, Duncan immediately got out. He went for the driver's door, but Courtney stopped him with her hand. "You can go ahead and go in, D. I'm gonna talk to Heather."

"Ok. See you at lunch, babe."

"Love you."

"Love you too." He walked towards campus.

Courtney waited a few seconds before turning towards her friend with a serious look on her face. "Are you going to be ok today?"

Heather paused, then nodded. "Yeah. I'll be fine."

"Just fine is not enough. I need you to be sure that you'll be ok. I can always turn around and take you back home."

"No, I wanna go back to school. I've missed so much already."

"—Alright." Courtney frowned. "I'm so sorry. I wish this never happened to you. But you know, you're so much better than him. If you see him today, show him that you're living without him!"

"That would be a lie because I hardly am." Heather sighed.

"But you will be. Someday you'll look back and be so grateful that you didn't stay with him. He's not worth your time or your tears."

Heather looked out the window. She watched people walk across the newly paved sidewalk with their backpacks and laptops. She grabbed the door handle. "Let's go inside." Courtney got out with her and walked next to her until they reached the double sliding glass doors.

"I'm heading to History. I'll see you at lunch, H." Courtney smiled.

"See you, Court." Heather forced a smile. Maybe if I pretend, I'll feel ok.

**

Alejandro was almost late for school. He frantically scrambled around his dresser for his jeans, threw on a slightly wrinkled blue shirt, and nearly put his shoes on the wrong feet. He came downstairs and sprinted past the kitchen, managing to make it out the door before his mother scolded him about eating breakfast every morning. The first person he thought about while he was on his way was Heather. She hadn't been to school since last Friday—almost exactly a week ago. And she didn't contact him or the professor about any homework assignments. He knew she wasn't someone who'd skip class all the time, so he was very concerned. It was almost hard for him to get up and go every day, not knowing if she'd be sitting at the desk in the middle row. He had been tempted to contact her through his tutoring number, but he knew he wasn't allowed to do that, and he didn't want to risk his TA position. All he could do was hope she was ok.

He went about his day like usual and took a deep breath before walking into the Spanish classroom. When he saw Heather walk through the door, it was like slow motion. She wore a white, oversized sweatshirt and black leggings with brown boots. He felt goosebumps across his skin. It was as if his heart started beating again. He felt like a fein who just relapsed. She was back, and suddenly everything was better. However, when he did a double-take on her outfit, something didn't sit right with him. She still looked good in a sweatshirt, but he never saw Heather wear anything causal. He also noticed that she wasn't wearing any makeup, even though, again, he thought she still looked beautiful. Something is definitely wrong.

After class, he didn't wait until she was up and walking to talk to her. "Heather, hola." He gave her a gentle smile. "You haven't been here all week. Are you alright, señorita?"

She looked up at him, staggered. "—What? I'm fine."

He gazed into her misty grey eyes. "You haven't been to class, your grade has dropped to a D, and you aren't made up like you usually are. Something's wrong."

Heather's eyes averted downward. Alejandro looked at her left hand and noticed that her ring finger was bare. He saw her squeeze her eyes shut. "I-I've gotta go." She stood up.

"Wait, Heather." He stepped towards her. "Do you need someone to talk to?"

She thought about it. She had Courtney, but she didn't want to hear anything about Duncan or see Duncan, which she mostly got whenever she talked to her. And as much as she hated to admit it, she didn't mind talking to Alejandro. She found herself nodding.

Alejandro looked around to ensure the teacher was gone and lowered his voice. "Would you like to talk somewhere more private? We can go to my house." She nodded again. "Are you sure? If you're comfortable with that."

"Yeah, that's fine." She crossed her arms over her waist.

He smiled at her halfheartedly. "I've just gotta grab my papers, and then we can head out." I can't believe she said yes! He thought. She must really need to talk. I wonder what happened between her and her fiancé.

The moment they were out of the building, Heather asked, "Are you even allowed to do this?"

"Do what, chica?" Alejandro unlocked his car from a few feet away.

"Hang out with a student out of class or tutoring sessions?"

"Technically, no. Although I am a student myself, I'm not supposed to have an unprofessional relationship with any student I'm tutoring. But no one is going to know. We are the same age, no?"

"I'm eighteen."

"Oh. Well, we're a year apart then."

"Whoa, is that a Porsche?!" Heather marveled at his bright convertible.

"Sí. I got it a few months ago when I first moved here from Peru."

"How are you that rich?" She teased, stepping off the sidewalk.

Alejandro reached over to open the passenger side door for her. "What a rather bold question to ask, señorita. But I'd be more than happy to elaborate on that." She rolled her eyes at his gesture and reply. "My grandparents own the most famous restaurant in Lima, La Mar. They stayed there after they had my dad, who met my mom. My mom and dad moved to São Paulo in Brazil and had my oldest brother, Carlos, there." Alejandro got in the car and started it. "They made a living off my dad, who's a Diplomat, then moved back to Peru when my mother was pregnant with my undesirable other brother." He shuddered.

"Who's the undesirable one?" Heather smirked, buckling her seatbelt.

"—José. Ugh. He is the bane of my existence." He started driving.

"Oh yeah, I remember when you flipped out over the phone about him coming over. That was funny."

Alejandro clenched his jaw. "No, it wasn't. You have no idea how terrible he can be."

"Ok then, geez." She raised her eyebrows. "My siblings are annoying too. And I have six of them."

"Six?! Dios, how do you deal with that?!"

"I don't. I either stay in my room all day, or I hang out with my friends or boyfr—" she awkwardly trailed off. "Yeah, I choose not to deal with my family."

Alejandro pursed his lips. He wanted to ask her about him but figured it wasn't the right time to while he was driving. "Well, I love mi familia. José is the only one who I cannot bear, but it is worth it if I get to see mi mama and papa."

"My parents suck." She pulled out her phone to check the time.

"I am sorry for that."

Heather sighed. "Do I really have a D?"

"Yes, it would seem so."

"Oh god." She rubbed her head. "Fuck."

He frowned, hating to see her like this.

"My grades have never been this shitty before."

"Don't worry. It is only September. I will help you."

"Thanks," she muttered, embarrassed.

They arrived at his house a few minutes later. Alejandro planned to open the passenger door for Heather again, but she beat him to it by getting out herself. He pouted to himself. Why must this woman ruin my attempts to be chivalrous? Fortunately for him, he got to open his house door for her. "My parents are away, so don't worry about anyone listening in."

Heather stepped into the house. She was greeted by warm air and a strong vanilla scent. The deep beige walls were covered with pictures in brown frames. A monstera plant was placed between the couch and a big chair, and a smaller plant lay on the wooden coffee table. "Wow, nice house."

"I know. I love showing it off to people."

"Narcissistic much?"

He laughed. "I can't help it. Would you like something to eat or drink?"

"No thanks."

"Alright. I am going to get myself some agua." Alejandro went to the kitchen and poured himself sparkling water in a wine glass.

"You've got to be kidding me," Heather said when she saw the water. "There's no way you have a fridge with sparkling water."

"I do. Are you sure you don't want any?" He raised an eyebrow.

Heather would be lying if she said she wasn't tempted. "Yep, I'm still good." There is no way I'm indulging in this jerk's water! He sat on the couch and patted the spot next to him. She sat down, but not as close as he had invited her to.

"So, Heather, I wanted to talk about your grade, but not in an educational sense. Your papers are always phenomenal, but they occasionally drop. And this is the lowest you've had. I just thought you'd want someone to confide in because you do not look happy today, chica."

She nervously chewed on her bottom lip. "Why are you asking me this? Why do you care?"

"Because, Heather, you're so smart. I'd hate to see you fail this class."

"I don't want—" She swallowed hard so she wouldn't start crying. "I don't want to fail."

"I know you don't. That's why I'm asking you: what's going on?"

She hugged herself. "My fiancé—he cheated on me. There, now you know all about my life!"

Alejandro's eyes widened. "Heather—I'm so sorry. I wasn't trying to impede on your personal life in any way. I—"

"Yes, you were! Why the hell would you invite me over here if you weren't?!"

He sighed. "I was just wondering if something was going on that—you didn't want to tell anyone else about. Like if you were in a dangerous situation you didn't know how to get out of, or a family death. I did not know it was that. I apologize."

"Whatever." She stared at the ground.

"And if you didn't want to tell me anything, then why did you agree to come here?"

"I don't—I don't know! Ok, fine, maybe I wanted to talk to someone besides my friend who's always with her boyfriend because I'm tired of seeing them together! It's been days, and I can't take it anymore! I'm so used to being with him all the time! It feels like I've been abandoned!"

"I would feel that way too! What he did to you is so disgusting. What a fool he was to let you go like that!"

"I'm so tired of feeling sad! I just want it back to the way it was before."

Alejandro had never been in a serious relationship, so he didn't exactly know how to comfort her. "That sounds very hard. What's his name?"

"Chandler." Heather held back an ocean of tears. It hurt just to say his name.

"I will go kill him for you," he teased.

She found herself laughing slightly. "That's what Courtney kept saying over the weekend. She's my friend. And I think she'd actually kill him."

"I would not put that past her." Alejandro stared at her, admiring her beauty, even when she was sad. "You're too gorgeous to be feeling this way."

"You know, flirting with me isn't gonna help me." Heather looked away, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"I am only speaking the truth. You are beautiful, Heather. And I hope you realize that Chandler isn't worth your grief."

Heather furrowed her eyebrows in thought. "He's not worth your time or your tears." She heard Courtney's voice from earlier in the back of her mind. "We've been together for two years. How am I supposed to just get over him?"

"I don't know. I'm afraid I do not have any experience in your predicament. But I know it's not going to be overnight. There is no way anyone could spend two years with someone so intimately and forget about them in less than two weeks."

Heather couldn't help but blush at the way he spoke. "Yeah, obviously."

Alejandro got back up. "I'm going to get you some sparkling water anyways. I feel like you were lying when you said you don't want any," he playfully grinned.

"I am not lying, you arrogant jerk!"

"I was not aware that serving someone water makes me arrogant."

"Without consent, it makes you an ass!" There was a hint of a smile on Heather's lips.

"I'm getting you water. You don't have to drink it, but I'm getting it." He went back into the kitchen and got her the same type of glass he was using. "Here you are, madame. A wine glass of water."

"That was the lamest thing I've ever heard." On the inside, Heather was laughing. She never expected a remark like this from him.

"Ouch. I thought Heather Wilson would love my jokes." Alejandro took a sip of his water.

"That's hardly a joke."

"Then I'd love to hear your version of one."

"Ugh. You can't just—I mean—ugh!"

He smirked in amusement. "You don't have any."

Heather thought of a joke her dad abused when she was little. "No, no, I do have one!" She sat up straight. "A rooster laid an egg on a henhouse. Which way did it roll?"

"Roosters don't lay eggs, chica. I've heard that riddle so many times."

"So what?! It's still a good one!"

"Not really. You need to step up your riddle game." Alejandro chuckled.

Her face flushed red. "It's not even my riddle, so it doesn't count!"

"Then you need to come up with your own. It's what a funny person would do."

Heather's jaw dropped. "Shut up! I can be funny!"

"Yes, I know that. But can you be funny when you're trying to be?"

"What do you even mean, stupid jerk?!"

"That." Alejandro cracked up.

"How is an insult funny?!"

"Your insults are. It is rather entertaining when you call me those offensive words."

"I seriously don't get how you're not affected by that! Everyone else I say that to is!"

"And I don't get how they are affected. You're cute when you're mean."

"I—what?!" She was blushing hard, but she masked her feelings with anger. "I can't believe this!! There's NO way you think I'm cute when I'm being mean! This is just another way to flirt with me!"

"Maybe, maybe not," Alejandro said.

"You are so ridiculous! Going that low? You sound like a fucking simp!" Heather suddenly burst out laughing. "I've lost it. I've lost my damn mind thanks to you! I don't even know what I'm fucking laughing about!"

Alejandro laughed with her. Her laughter made him so happy. Happy was an understatement. He couldn't describe how happy it made him. Her laughter was like chocolate-covered strawberries—sweet and delightful.

Tears formed in Heather's eyes when she stopped laughing, but she blinked them back. Her emotions had never been this out of control before. She didn't know how to handle it. A part of her felt so sad, but ever since she came to Alejandro's house, another part felt this indescribable joy. A joy she'd never even felt once in her life. She blamed it on her mental instability. She took a drink of her water.

"I knew you'd succumb to the sparkling water." Alejandro teased.

Heather bit the inside of her cheek. "Shut up; do not make me start laughing again."

"What if I want to make you laugh again, Hermosa?"

"Stop calling me beautiful." She blushed.

"I would if it weren't true."

Heather looked at her phone. "Shoot, um—I've gotta go. My mom's yelling at me through text to come home for dinner."

"Ok, chica. Can we have another session on Monday?" He asked.

"Yeah, whatever. I have nothing better to do anyway."

"Me neither."

"Dickhead."

"You said it first."

Alejandro drove Heather back home, a bit upset that she had to go. He was looking forward to tutoring someone on a Monday for once. When they got to her house, Heather started to get out, but Alejandro stopped her. "Hey, wait, would you mind—exchanging numbers?"

"You already gave me the number when we first started our sessions," she reminded him.

"No, I mean my actual number. Not the one I use for tutoring. That way, you and I can text each other whenever we'd like."

"—Yeah, ok." Heather's heart sped up. Is he flirting with me? Do I want him flirting with me? They told each other their numbers and saved them in their contacts.

"If you ever need to talk to anyone, all you have to do is text or call." Alejandro smiled.

Heather was surprised. Alejandro had been so—nice to her today. She couldn't tell if he was just trying to get her to like him, but she liked this genuine side of him. "Thank you." She couldn't look him in the eyes when she said it because his magnetic field was way too strong. She almost couldn't get out of the car because she felt so drawn to him. It was scaring her, and she didn't understand how she could be this attracted to someone. This has to be trouble.

When she got inside, she blocked out her mother's regular insults and went to the bathroom to wash up. As she rubbed her hands together, she imagined her left hand to be Alejandro's. Snap the fuck out of it! He could never truly like you in that way. And even if he does, he wouldn't want to stay with you for long. You're such a bad girlfriend. You made your boyfriend hit you and cheat on you. She started scrubbing at her hands even harder, getting angry at herself. Now that she was alone, it was easier to let her tears out. Your own mother can't stand you. And your dad can't either, but he's too afraid to say it.

Heather slid down the wall, watching her reflection in the bathroom mirror disappear. She got a new message request on her phone. She was curious, so she opened it. It read:

Heather,
Hi, it's Chandler. I used my cousin's phone to text you because you blocked me. I have done some self-reflecting over the weekend and this week. I've been restless for the past few days, tossing and turning in the middle of the night because all I could see was you crying. I hate seeing you cry, beautiful. And I hate that I was the reason you were crying. I had so many dreams about us together, like how it used to be. I realized that I love you more than anything on this earth and that my fears -true or not- shouldn't divide us because all that matters, in the end, is love. I've missed you so much, baby, and I am so beyond sorry that I did this to you. I would give anything to kiss you and hold you again. I just want you back in my arms. I fucked up so badly, but I was hurting so badly. I was in such a bad place. I hope you can forgive me and we can still be engaged. And if you don't want to make amends, I will forever be sad, but I will always love you♥️

Heather looked at the message over and over again, feeling a range of emotions. But she mostly felt relieved. She was more upset over the fact that Chandler never apologized than the fact that he had cheated on her. All she wanted was that security back because she had gotten so used to it over the years, even if it messed with her head. It was like she craved that pain—or was fine with it as long as she still had Chandler. After a few more moments in thought, Heather texted back: We can talk tomorrow. I love you too.