It's been three months since the last time I set my eyes on Jean-Paul's face. We have emailed or called daily, but it's not the same as looking into the eyes of the love of your life and knowing everything will be okay.

It is now Thanksgiving. As much as I had hoped that Jean-Paul and I would get to spend Thanksgiving at my parents' house in Kentucky, that just wasn't possible. So instead, he's spending the day with his mom as she makes his favorite dinner and dessert. Jean-Paul had never celebrated Thanksgiving as the French don't celebrate. In fact, he didn't even know what Thanksgiving was until I told him. He just thought it was a day that Americans gather around the table to carve the turkey and eat as a family. Which he's not wrong.

"They should just call it turkey day" he had said before I explained to him why we celebrate the holiday. Then we both would break out into deep laughter.

Oh, how I missed Jean-Paul and his sense of humor.

I began to get my belongings packed and on the road to Kentucky. It would be about an eleven-hour drive. Enough time for me to let all of my thoughts run through my head...great!

I grabbed my bags and headed for the door. I took in my apartment one last time before putting my bags into the car and making the trip to Kentucky.

As I was in the car driving to Kentucky, I tried listening to music, but every song that came on to the radio seemed to be some kind of love song. It hurt my heart to realize that the man I loved is so many miles away and we wouldn't be with each other for the holidays.

I had been busy enough at work not to let my mind think so much about Jean-Paul. Belle and I have become good friends as well as both of us becoming close to Nina. It was only at night when my mind would drift off to think about Jean-Paul and how much my heart missed him.

Things did not seem the same after he left. I only hoped that he would find his way back to me very soon. I just needed to see him again and let him remind me that what we had was special and to remind me that we were perfect for each other.

I turned the radio off and drove in silence the rest of the way to Kentucky. My mind kept drifting back to Jean-Paul. I often found myself wondering if he missed me, the way I missed him. I was so afraid that even if he found his way back to me, much time would have passed, that things could never be the same.

Finally, after an eleven-hour drive on very little sleep, I made it to my parents' house. I walked inside and was greeted by hugs and kisses.

"I'm so glad to see you made it," Mom said.

"We sure have missed you," Dad chimed in.

We walked inside and I took my luggage into the guest room for the night. I joined my mother in the kitchen for dinner. My favorite cooking memory with my mom was definitely the time my mother and I surprised my father with his anniversary meatloaf he had wanted for dinner. The look on his face said it all.

I helped my mother peel and cut up potatoes, carrots, and onions to put into the roast she had been cooking for hours.

I whipped up the batter for the cornbread and we put that into the oven to bake.

Once the vegetables and cornbread were finished, it was time to eat. My father set the table, and I helped my mother take the food to the table.

We joined around the dinner table once again, holding hands and, giving thanks for our dinner. We put some food into our plates and began eating.

"I'm so sorry that Jean-Paul couldn't join us for Thanksgiving this year," my father said.

"Me too Dad, me too."

My head dropped down and I tried to keep my composure. I think my Dad noticed my reaction. He looked at me and back at my Mom as they began whispering back and forth to each other.

"I'm sorry, princess. I shouldn't have said anything," he finally admitted as I raised my head up to look at him.

"It's not your fault, Daddy. I just miss him, that's all."

We finished our dinner in silence. I went to help my Mom clean up the kitchen after dinner, but my father insisted on helping her instead.

I walked up to my old room that they turned into a guest bedroom. Everything was almost exactly how I left it when I left for college.

After they cleaned up the kitchen, my parents came up to tell me goodnight. After they gave me a hug and bid me a good night, I turned out the light, and stared up into the open space of the room. My heavy eyes became wide awake as soon as my head hit the pillow.

I hadn't been able to get a good night's sleep since Jean-Paul left to go back to Paris. I wasn't sure if I was starting to get depressed at the thought that he may never return, but I was sure that was the reasoning behind my sleepless nights.

Finally, after tossing and turning for a very long time, my eyes succumbed to sleep.

🦃Thanksgiving🦃

The next morning was Thanksgiving. I set my alarm for seven AM so I could get up and help my mother start preparing the food for dinner.

I ran downstairs in a much better mood than I was in the day before. I washed the turkey off and slid it into a turkey bag, before placing it in the roaster.

My mother got the ham out of the refrigerator and prepared it. When she placed it into the oven, she and I walked into the living room and I began to show my parents all of the pictures Jean-Paul and I took while we were in Tennessee for our vacation.

I laughed as I reminisced on the memories Jean-Paul and I shared in Gatlinburg. I told a few stories of our adventures to my parents. My father loved the story in particular about me wanting to go to an escape room and about how I was terrified once we went inside. But with Jean-Paul by my side, he helped me through the experience and we made it out just in the nick of time.

It was at that moment that I decided to start using my social media accounts to blog about the places that I have visited and places that I planned to visit in the future. I grabbed my phone off the nearby table.

While we were waiting for the turkey and ham to finish baking, I decided to upload some old photos to Instagram from things we visited in Paris while vacationing there sixteen years prior, as well as upload some photos from mine and Jean-Paul's trip to Tennessee.

A little while later, I walked back into the kitchen to help my mother prepare rolls, mashed potatoes, stuffing, gravy, and green bean casserole for our Thanksgiving feast.

Once the dinner was finished, we prepared our plates and sat down once again around the table to say thanks. Once we were finished, my father wanted to continue the Thanksgiving tradition that we have done every year since I was a young girl- going around the table to say what we were thankful for. We decided to keep the tradition alive this year.

"I'll go first," my Dad started. "I'm thankful for my beautiful wife Blair, my beautiful daughter Blakely, my good health, and my job.

Next, it was my Mom's turn.

"I'm thankful for my amazing husband Sam, my sweet Blakely, my good health, and all of the memories we have shared together."

As my Mom finished saying what she was thankful for, my mother and father's eyes fell on me. I wanted to speak, but nothing could come out. I sat for a minute thinking long and hard about what I wanted to say.

"I'm thankful for my wonderful parents. The parents that would give anything to make sure I was well taken care of, even if it meant giving up the last bite of food so I wouldn't go hungry. For the parents that put my wants and needs before their own. I'm also thankful for the amazing man that I met and fell in love with, even though I hadn't intended to-Jean-Paul. Wherever he is at this very moment, and whatever he is doing, I just hope that he is happy and well."

The table went silent as we all began to eat our food.

Once dinner was finished, I helped my mother put the leftovers in the fridge, while we cleaned the kitchen back up. I bid my parents a goodnight, before slipping back into the bed. I had a long drive ahead of me the next morning to go back to New York. I had better get some good sleep.

I looked at my phone one last time before putting the screen to rest for the night. I made sure my alarm was set for the next morning before scrolling through social media.

When I started scrolling through Instagram, I saw many likes and comments from Jean-Paul. He seemed to love all of the pictures I uploaded.

My heart melted at the message that he left right before my eyes closed in sleep. It read:

My dearest Blakely,

I'm sorry that I couldn't be with you in Kentucky today visiting your parents and eating Thanksgiving food. Things haven't been the same for me since I've left. My heart is desperately missing you. I feel incomplete without you by my side. One day, we will be together in person again. I cannot wait for that day to come. I love you with my entire heart. You have stolen it from that first moment I saw you. I hope you can forgive me for taking your heart and running away. Hopefully, I will get to see you sooner rather than later. I hope you're still thinking about me, like I constantly think of you. Until I see you again.

xoxo Jean-Paul.