GRIFFIN E. WALKER
June, 2020

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Harry's parents were pretty amusing to be around. They were very laid back and nice. Expecting them, especially his mother, to be really strict and judgmental, based on her posh pronunciation, it was a relief to find out they were a little bit like my parents. Not to mention the fact that they were also clearly minted which gave me the idea that they had the potential to be stuck up, and if we still lived in a world where class system was so strict, they definitely would've been at the very top. Overall, though, they were a nice surprise.

Harry and I spent a while at GBK which I didn't mind at all. We had the best burger, chips and onion rings and some of the best conversations. It was all silly and jokey, just enjoying each other's company until his mother called and asked where we were. Feeling like we were teenagers, being ordered home as we hit the curfew, we left with pouted lips, slow steps to drag out the journey to the agreed spot.

We listened to Melissa's experience at John Lewis as we went to find Daniel at Nespresso, having his tenth coffee to help him make up his mind regarding which flavours he wished to buy as he conversed with the staff. Harry kept his arm around my shoulders, leaning into me as our hands interlocked, hanging from my left side, my right hand holding his waist. Fake snoring to show his father how long he was taking, I laughed at him being silly until he kissed me on the mouth. In the end, he decided to have a coffee, too, and also bought two boxes of the flavour since he liked it so much.

Once we walked around a little more, chatting about things, we said our goodbyes. It was almost six in the evening by the time we got back to the hotel, the time just ran past us as we kept ourselves busy.

"Do I look rich enough?" I asked, walking out of the bathroom to find Harry dressed already. "Holy fuck," I mumbled, my words turning into a quiet chuckle as I let my eyes linger on him for a bit. To say that he looked hot as fuck was a bloody understatement.

He looked extremely handsome and straight out of a beauty or fashion magazine. High waisted black trousers covered up his delicious thighs, pinching in around his waist whilst he showed off the swallows facing on his chest by wearing a white tank top. The gold chain around his neck with the cross in the middle was layered with a longer chain and a little ring around it. My eyes were attracted to the red blazer on the bed which looked velvet. His hair was styled, unlike any other time, looking freshly washed, shiny and fluffy as the product held it together. Hell, the man even had a single stud earring in his right ear.

"Yeah, you'll fit in," he smirked at me, answering my question. I wore white trousers, clasped onto my waist with a belt in the same colour. Deciding to go with a satin shirt, the burnt orange colour definitely clashed with his red blazer.

"I knew you could dress but I can't seem to look away from you right now," I commented, ignoring what he said. Still standing in the bathroom doorway, I allowed my eyes to soak up the beauty in the form of Harry Styles. "You look so fucking sexy."

"Why, thank you," he grinned, stepping over to me to breathe a kiss on my forehead. "You are quite gorgeous yourself."

"Ah, see," I chuckled, putting my hands on his chest, feeling his necklaces under my fingertips. "You're making it cute—you're being romantic."

"How so?"

"Calling me gorgeous when I called you sexy?" I raised my eyebrow and he smiled, shaking his head whilst looking up at the ceiling. "Do you want me naked and moaning in your bed by the end of tonight or dressed and sleeping with the biggest grin on my face?"

"When you put it like that..." his lips curled into a dirty smirk, his eyes fixated on my chest. Leaning closer, he placed his mouth on my neck, inching towards my throat as he left wet kisses on my skin. The back of my head hit the wall as my tongue darted out to damp my lips, closing my eyes as I enjoyed his soft mouth on my neck and down my exposed chest. "Drowning in your scent would be an ideal death."

Pressing my hands on his cheeks, I lifted his head to peck his lips.

"The way you flirt is next level, baby."

"Thanks," he grinned, closing his eyes. Watching his eyebrows dip as my phone started ringing, his smile fading into an upset pout, he let me go. "Who is it?"

"The boss," I sighed, accepting the phone call. "Hello?"

"Hey. Can you talk?" she asked.

"Yeah, what's up?" I wondered, glancing at Harry who was looking at me curiously. I shrugged. "Did something happen?"

"I know that you are working to find Nadine Miller but I'm calling to let you know that I'm ending that little side project."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me," she said sternly. "James is no longer your security guard, either. He violated a lot of rules and those cannot go without consequences."

"You can't do that!"

"I can and I did," she sighed. "When you come back to London, we're gonna need to have a chat as it's not appropriate through phone."

"I don't understand why you're doing this..." I shook my head, staring at the wall with widened eyes. I didn't want to believe how she was controlling me like I was one of her little puppets. "She is my best friend and she is danger. You can't expect me to sit back and do nothing."

"Darling, she was never your best friend and you better get that through your head before it hurts you later in life," she spoke coldly to me. Finding it hard to see how this was the same Rachel I've known for the past handful of years, I stayed quiet, not knowing what to respond to that. "Callum talked me into letting you stay and blow off some steam for now so enjoy your time off."

"Unless you're planning on saving her yourself, I suggest you stay out of my way and my business," I responded. "I will find Nadine whether you approve of it or not."

"Griffin..."

"No. You know how hurt I was after our friendship ended. Knowing what I know now, not just about this world but her, too, it's clear to me that she's always been involved and everything that she's done, has been influenced by rules and consequences and people like you trying to control her!" I snapped, feeling the need to stand by her, even after everything that happened. "I have the power to help her for the first time since I've discovered everything and I'll be fucking damned if I let you, or anyone, stand in the way of that."

"She does not deserve your loyalty after all the pain she put you through. Siding with her, will only make you a target, not to mention Harry," she dropped his name, in hopes of intimidating me. "Do you really want to go through all of that, again?"

"You always did have a wonderful way with words, didn't you?"

"And you always had trouble following rules, didn't you?" I scoffed at the sound of her clapback.

"Whatever. We'll talk when I'm home," I muttered, ending the phone call abruptly. Shaking my head as I tossed the device on the bed, I strutted over to my shoes, sitting on the chair to slide them on my feet. Harry's intense stare followed my every move, from the chair to the mirror where I adjusted my belt and pulled my shirt a little more out from beneath it. "I'm ready."

"I can see that," he spoke. "You're also mad."

"Maybe."

"We should talk."

"Maybe."

"I'm not going anywhere until we do," he made it clear, looking at me through my reflection. Sighing dramatically, I turned around and crossed my arms in front of my chest. "Why am I hearing of you wanting to go on a suicide mission? Why are you so concerned about Nadine?"

"It's not a suicide mission," I argued. "And do you not care about her anymore?"

"This thing is much bigger than me and I don't think I'll ever truly understand it or your place in it," he started. "But if Rachel is stopping you from doing something, I'd like to think it's for your own good."

"You don't even know her and you're siding with her," I laughed dryly, slamming my hands against my thighs. Unbelievable.

"Don't make this sound like I'm against you," he spoke, his nostrils flaring as he inhaled deeply, holding himself back from exploding on me.

"Then don't fucking say shit to me that you know will only make me want to do it more!"

"Alright, let's calm down, okay?" he frowned, putting his hands before him in the air. "Let's talk about this logically and like adults, alright? No point in arguing because we'll get nowhere. We promised to do better, remember?"

Holding the eye contact for a while, I was the one to break it. Sighing as the anger clogged up in my chest and clouding my mind, eventually dissolved, I shook my head. This is why I didn't tell anyone about my plan. This is why I wanted to find Nadine on my own. I knew that no one would want to help me or they would try to tell me it was stupid and dangerous. Inserting myself in business that was not mine had to be one of my top talents, yes, but it was for a good reason.

"Would you not do everything in your power to save someone if you knew you could?" I asked Harry, knowing very well that he would. Getting to know him all over again, opened my eyes to more of him than I ever thought there was. I knew his heart and it was good—pure.

"Griffin..."

"It's a question that, I'm afraid, cannot be answered by my name."

Shaking his head, he said, "You know that I would. I would save someone if I was in a position to do that."

"Okay, so why is it so hard to accept and let me go through with it?" I asked. "Rachel acts like I'll be walking into a war zone with guns aiming at me."

"Listen," he huffed, rubbing his face with his hands before he spoke again. "I don't think you're thinking rationally. I don't think you are considering everything. You can be extremely impatient which leads you to making faulty decisions."

"Oh, so now you want to lecture me on how I go about my life?" I laughed as I walked around the room, standing by the windows to look out at the city lights. "Honestly, why do I even bother? Could just ask you and Rachel to tell me what to do. Maybe then, I'd think rationally and consider everything without being impatient and making faulty decisions."

"You're attacking me when I'm trying to help you realise what's going on and figure out an alternative."

"Because it feels like you're against me which leaves me with no one by my side."

"That's not true and you know that," he said. "You have me on your side. Callum. Rachel."

"That's funny because you all talk to me like I'm a fucking child," I scoffed. "She flat out told me how things were going to be on the phone, without the room for conversation. She didn't ease me into the idea of letting the plan go—no, she took it in her hands and ended it for me."

"You mentioned that she's more involved than you or your cousin. That makes me think she knows better and that's why she called off the plan. It makes sense when you think about it."

"Okay, yeah, she knows better—so what? How am I going to learn if she keeps saving my ass?"

"The way you want to learn and the way you should are very different. I think her issue is that you are diving head first into the unknown, without a contingency plan or a way of dealing with the outcomes in the end."

"The way I want to learn is first hand. There's no use in anyone telling me how they lived through it because it won't do shit for me," I explained, feeling frustrated because I didn't think anyone understood me or the way I wanted things to go. "And yeah, I might not have a backup plan or a way in which everything will be handled after, but that's because I haven't gotten that far yet. I'm not thick, I'm not going to walk in front of people with guns going off just because I want attention."

"Okay," he responded, almost like he didn't know what else to say without me having something to reply. Lowering to my knees, I held my head at my temples, trying to not let my tears escape. They were from being so angry because I felt like nothing was in my control. Because I felt like I was alone. Because I couldn't do what I set out to do.

"I just want the guilt to lessen," I whispered, feeling pathetic as a couple of hot tears rolled down my cheeks. Sniffling, I wiped them away quickly, blinking rapidly and towards the ceiling to make them go away. "I don't want to feel like I don't deserve you every time I look at you."

"Griffin."

"I know that I'm impatient and I make shit decisions. I know that I'm not that clever and I don't have experience in this shit. I know that I shouldn't do it because I don't know what I'm doing," I continued to vent to help myself feel less heavy. "But I need to do it because I can't live with this feeling anymore."

Hiding my face in my arms, my hands holding my knees, I cried to myself in silence. My heart was breaking all over again, shattering into pieces that pierced through my chest. Gulping down my sobs to feel less pathetic, I wished for this to be over. I wished for my feelings to stop controlling me so much. I wished to feel nothing.

Harry walked over to me and squatted down, too. His cologne was overwhelming in my sensitive state, almost too strong. Gently, he placed his hand over the back of mine, rubbing his thumb over my fingers. He whispered a quiet 'hey' as he eventually sat down and pulled me in his arms. He told me it was going to be okay and that he was there for me and I shouldn't worry about anything as long as he was around. He promised to talk to Rachel for me if that's what I wanted because he'd do the absolute most just to prove that he is on my side and with me.

Making a million and one promises, he managed to calm me down in the end. His thumbs caught the last of my tears before he reached to the side to grab his shirt from today and use it as a towel to dry my cheeks. It ended up stained by my makeup but he shrugged, telling me it didn't matter as long as I was okay. He also used it to wipe his neck and down his chest where my tears poured down, his white tank top strangely untouched.

"Start the bath for us, yeah?" he spoke to me gently, running his thumb along my bottom lip. When he saw me frown, he continued, "I'm gonna call mum and let her know we won't be going to dinner."

"What?" I whispered. "No—don't do that. We'll go, I just need to redo my makeup."

"Griffin, it's okay. We don't have to go. It's a stupid dinner," he smiled at me reassuringly. "We can take my brother out some other time to make up for it."

"You wanted to be with your family. I told you I'll only come if I won't be in the way of that," I reminded him, sniffling as I kicked my heels off and pushed myself up from the floor. Stretching my arms out for him, he was hesitant to take my hands. "We're going to celebrate your brother's birthday and be with your family. My drama can wait until we're back home."

"This may not be what you want to hear, but we will need to talk about what just happened, alright?" he looked at me seriously, not about to accept anything but a nod in agreement from me regarding this. He nodded, too, standing up and kissing my forehead. His lips stayed pressed to my skin for a bit, his thumbs stroking my jaw as he held my neck with his hands.

I really, really liked it when he gave me forehead kisses. There was something so pure about them. It almost felt like his way of speaking words he couldn't voice—not yet, anyway. Feeling his warm lips just between my brows, made the butterflies homing in the pit of my stomach wake up. Every time.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

I was a little bit nervous on the way to the restaurant. We decided to take an Uber there because Harry thought he might have a drink and didn't want to drive back to the hotel like that. It was also much quicker. I failed to realise when we arrived, the cold air fanning over the side of my face, pushed me out of my own little world.

My sweaty hand engulfed in Harry's, he led us to the restaurant. We weren't in a hurry to walk over from where the driver dropped us off and it was nice to take in the evening air. It helped in calming me down slightly though the minute Harry opened the door for me and let me walk through first, my stomach tied itself into a knot. All of a sudden, my throat dried up and my feet rooted into the carpet.

"It's gonna be alright," he smiled at me when he noticed the panicked expression on my face. Sliding his hands onto my cheeks, he gave me five tender kisses, each of them lingering a little longer to keep my attention focused on him. A deep blush crept onto my face as he had done that in front of so many people. "Ready?"

"As I'll ever be," I sighed, letting him take a hold of my hand again as we walked towards the table where his family would be waiting.

Daniel was the first to stand up and welcome us, Melissa smiling and ushering us to take a seat. A very pregnant lady, who had to be Ellie, introduced herself and her husband, Matthew, to me. Next on the list was a woman, around my age, perhaps a little older, who went by the name Leslie and she happened to be the birthday boy's girlfriend. Harry spoke about her a little bit, telling me how they've been fucking around for a while but he never thought it was anything serious. At the time, I told him that we were practically the same but he just rolled his eyes and denied it.

"Where's Alex?" Harry asked after he poured himself some water, moving onto my glass. I smiled at him and lifted it to my lips, taking a sip.

"I'm here," came the answer from the side. Turning my head, my eyes locked on the man before me. The liquid in my mouth almost leaked as the shock settled in, staring at the one person I thought I'd never see again. "Griffin?" he called my name, sounding exactly how it did all those years ago.

Swallowing my drink, I dabbed my fingers against my lips, clearing my throat as I spoke his name, nodding, "Alex."

"You two know each other?" the oldest Styles sibling asked, looking at me and then at her brother. To say that we knew each other was a bit of an understatement. I knew what he looked like naked and he knew what I looked like naked. I was simping over him for weeks after we fucked and now...

Oh my god.

Now, I was fucking his brother. And I was his brother's date to his birthday meal. With his current girlfriend around. Plus, his parents. And sister.

"Yeah, we, uh, we met a while back," he answered, plastering a smile on his face as I wished for the ground to swallow me up. "Didn't think I'd ever see you again, to be honest," he spoke to me directly, letting his eyes linger a little bit before he turned to Harry.

Oh, god.

Harry.

"This is great!" Melissa chuckled, raising her glass filled with golden bubbles. "It's like you were meant to be a part of our family, Griffin!" she nudged me as we sat by each other. Harry was on my right but I was kind of too uncomfortable to look at him, thinking he knew exactly how his brother and I met.

Eventually, the topic of the main conversation drifted and I could crawl back into my shell. Much to my surprise, Harry's hand landed on my knee, comforting me as he engaged in whatever everyone was talking about. Before they brought out the food, I had to excuse myself and go to the bathroom because my emotions were starting to overwhelm me.

I was in the company of Harry's entire immediate family which was stressful. They had no idea who I was or the things I've done, the actions that led their youngest son to be placed in situations I would never forgive myself for. They welcomed me with open arms without the knowledge and I felt horrible as it dawned on me. Not to mention, that I've also hooked up with their other son who now had a girlfriend and clearly did not like me or the fact that I was present once she figured out how Alex and I knew each other. To think of what Harry was going to say to me after was also on my mind, though kind of prayed he'd just laugh it off with me.

All in all, today was a hell of a lot. Perhaps, I should've taken Harry's offer and stayed at the hotel. Then again, I would've missed out on everything that happened at the dinner. He was so careful with me when I sat back down, leaning over and kissing my cheek as he asked how I was feeling. He didn't look like he was angry with me or anything which was a massive relief. Once I reassured him that I was okay, he smiled at me and gave me one more kiss on the cheek.