Dear Tarquin McTavish,

Hello! Wow, that was a lot more enthusiastic than I envisioned it to be. Alright, back on track. Tarquin, do I even want to ask? Did you wake up one morning and say; Do you know what I'm going to do today? I'm going to trap my muggle neighbour in a tea kettle! Point of fact, if something involves "trapping" and "muggles" it's probably not a good idea. 

Normally, I'm not this sarcastic, at least I don't think I am. Am I? Can a building building be sarcastic? That was rhetorical, please don't answer that. Anyhow, I'm just frustrated in keeping track of all the STUPID things people do that send them her. I'm not targeting you (though you are a pretty good example) of what inhumane things humans do to each other. I'm not even human, and it seems I have a better understanding of what humane means than half the people here. 

Next time remember that muggles are pretty defenceless against magic, especially if, you know, you put them in tea kettles.