Considering that Lucas pretty much never knew what was going to happen from one day to the next, this day shouldn't have felt any different.

It did though. It felt big. Maybe even bigger than it actually was, that William was leaving.

Logically, he knew that people split up all the time. He knew that it wasn't the end of the world. He'd seen it on loads of occasions and wondered how anyone functioned if this was how they were feeling.

Would anyone ever like him this much again? Would he ever want anyone else the same way? Would William find someone else? Would he come back for him?

He didn't know where they stood after this. They hadn't spoken about it. They'd just enjoyed each other's company for a few days.

Lucas didn't regret that, but now, sitting on the bus with William's shoulder against his, he just wished he knew what was going to happen next.

He wanted to ask but his throat was all closed up and all he managed was a small sigh.

William took his hand.

Surprised, Lucas looked at William, who was already watching him with such worry written across his face, that Lucas got his answer. William was just as uncertain as he was.

Swallowing, Lucas leaned into William and not at all concerned about who, in the crowded morning traffic happened to be watching, kissed him warmly.

William melted into the touch for a few minutes before pulling back to speak.

"We missed our stop a few minutes ago," he said with a sigh.

"What?"

Lucas looked out the window.

"Shit! Why didn't you say anything?" he demanded, pulling the bell.

He hurried off the bus, William following sluggishly behind him.

By the time they reached the train station, people were already boarding. Panic hit Lucas, washing over him in waves. He didn't know how to say goodbye. He didn't know if this even was goodbye.

They would see each other again, he was sure, but would Lucas be here waiting for William's return or would it just be in passing, on the street?

"Hey."

William's voice drew Lucas' attention back to the present.

He was reaching into his bag, shuffling through all of his things, frowning, and Lucas knew he was stalling again.

"If you miss the train, you'll just have to catch the next one, you know."

William pursed his lips and looked at Lucas.

"That would give us a few more hours," he said.

Lucas bit his lip and swallowed and managed not to do anything crazy like dragging William away and hiding him in his apartment.

"Isn't there anywhere closer you could go?" he asked. His voice only trembled a little bit.

William shook his head.

He looked just as forlorn as he had last night, saying goodbye to his mom. Had he always been so easy to read, Lucas wondered, had Lucas simply been that oblivious to the way William looked at him?

"I have something for you," William said and came out of his bag with a thick notebook.

"I started this a while ago," he said, pushing it into Lucas' hands.

"What is it?" Lucas asked.

"Your notes," William said nudging Lucas playfully. "Translated into English."

Lucas flipped through the book, awed. He vaguely remembered drawing these diagrams and charts in the margins, but the way everything was color coded and so neat, each with its own headers and highlighted sections, the words all in order in neat, clear writing...

"I don't know how you understood it to this level," Lucas admitted. "To be honest, I don't even know what the professors are talking about half the time."

"Well maybe you will now," William said.

Lucas sighed.

"You realize that these notes were supposed to help you out, not me."

William smiled softly.

"I was never really in it for the notes, Lucas," he said.

Warmth spread through Lucas and he clutched the book to his chest.

"I was mostly in it for the food, at first," he admitted.

William chuckled.

"I'm aware," he said.

For another minute they stared at each other, neither wanting to prompt the inevitable.

Finally, William reached out, fingers flitting against Lucas' skin before they settled on the nape of his neck.

"You'll make sure to eat everyday, right?" he asked.

"I'll be fine," Lucas said.

William pulled Lucas into the embrace he was waiting for. His arms were so tight around him that all Lucas could do was squeeze his eyes shut and hope he didn't let go.

"You know my mom would feed you any time," William said, voice muffled in his hair.

The whistle blew and Lucas managed a deep breath before he pushed William away.

"I'll be fine," he repeated.

He leaned up, kissed William quickly, trying hard not to think about how it could be the last time and pulled back.

"Go," he said.

William took a breath, straightened and got onto the train.

Lucas watched him go, unable to look away, until William disappeared into the train's depths, luggage dragging behind him.

The terminal was emptying quickly, commotion settling, people leaving.

The train was running loudly, readying to go, but a loud tap on one of the windows drew his attention.

William smiled at him from the other side of the glass and Lucas' heart skipped at the sight of him there. He smiled back, swamped with sudden happiness that he was getting to see him again, already.

When the train started to move, William did too. He lifted a hand into view.

Lucas knew he was signing something. He recognized the odd position as something that would be in William's book, but he didn't know what it meant and before he could do anything other than frown, the train pulled away and William was gone.

Lucas made his way home, dazed.

He wasn't sure how he felt at the moment, except exhausted.

He trudged his way into the building, sinking back against the elevator wall as he went up, absently remembering the last time he had been here with William.

When the door opened in his hall, though, he froze, staring at the familiar figure standing pathetically by his door.

"Alex," he said, frowning. "What are you doing here?"

Alex sank a little at the accusatory tone of Lucas' voice and shrugged.

"Isn't it obvious?" he asked.

Lucas glanced down at the pizza box in his hands and his stomach growled despite himself.

Alex's green eyes glinted with triumph but Lucas crossed his arms, attempting to be strong.

"It's ten AM," he said. "Isn't it a bit early for pizza?"

Alex gave him an incredulous look.

"Do you actually care?" He asked.

Lucas frowned. He couldn't outright lie when it came to pizza, so he tried a different tactic.

"You can't just buy me with food," he said.

But really, he could smell the pepperoni and his anger was disappearing fast.

"I'm not," Alex said innocently. "I just want to talk and thought we could eat while we do."

Lucas swallowed. He kind of wanted to say no out of stubbornness but he did want to hear what Alex had to say... plus pizza...

Caving with a sigh, Lucas unlocked the door, trying to ignore Alex's relieved smile.

He stepped inside and tried the light switch, letting out a shriek of amazement when they turned on.

"Electricity!" Alex shouted. "It's alive!"

Lucas whooped with excitement, forgetting he was pretending to be mad.

"I paid the bill on Friday," he said. "I didn't know it'd be hooked up so fast."

Alex slid the pizza box onto the counter and looked around before his proud gaze settled on Lucas.

"Look at you, all grown up."

Lucas blushed and lifted his chin, facing Alex.

"So you had something you wanted to say?"

Alex opened the box and slid the pizza toward Lucas.

He waited until he had a slice in his hand before starting.

"So," Alex started.

"The pizza is cold," Lucas interrupted.

Alex blinked.

"How long were you waiting for me?" Lucas asked slowly.

Alex shrugged nonchalantly.

"Since about nine-ish," he said.

He picked up a slice, not looking at Lucas as he picked at a piece of pepperoni.

"How long have we been friends now?" he asked.

"Since September."

"September," Alex said thoughtfully. "You fell in the creek right in front of me and we've been friends ever since."

He chewed his lip, thinking for a moment.

"You know, I've kind of always known you as this clumsy guy who's always down on his luck," Alex said.

Lucas swallowed.

"That pretty much sums it up," he said dejectedly.

Alex frowned.

"Well it probably doesn't help that your friends are standing there laughing at you while you lose your jobs, have no power or food, fail classes--"

"Are you trying to make me feel worse?" Lucas asked. Seriously, he was even losing his appetite.

Alex put his uneaten slice back in the box with a sigh.

"I feel like shit," he said. "I've been a shitty person and a shittier friend."

"That's not true," Lucas said. "You bring me food all the time."

Alex sighed.

"I guess," he muttered.

Lucas swallowed down the rest of his slice thoughtfully.

"I've paid all my bills," he said. "The babysitting is just about enough for that, but not enough for the extras like food and busses and stuff."

"Food isn't an extra," Alex said frowning. "You should be buying groceries before paying your phone."

Lucas shrugged.

"Anyway, I probably need to find something else."

"I'll help you," Alex said at once. "I'll help with your resume and coach you on what not to do. Maybe we can get you back into the Greenie Mart."

"And work with Blake again?" Lucas said with a shudder.

Alex chuckled.

"I'll help you find something else, then," he said and then his smile faded and he met Lucas' eyes with a frown. "I'm sorry about the other day."

Lucas looked away.

He wanted to brush it off now that he was getting an apology and pizza but it wasn't that easy.

"I sat in a room full of people laughing at me for thinking someone could like me."

Alex grimaced.

"It sounds really bad when you say it like that," he said. "I'm sorry. I'll keep saying it if you need and keep bringing pizza, everyday, until you completely forgive me."

"I already do," Lucas admitted.

"Thank god," Alex said. "I would have done it, but I do work at Greenie Mart while putting myself through college so..."

Lucas rolled his eyes.

"Whatever," he muttered. "I still expect food."

Alex chuckled and finally began eating.

"So is that where you've been the last few days?" he asked. "With Will?"

Lucas didn't comment on the nickname.

"Yeah," he said. "I stayed at his place for the weekend."

"It wasn't a weekend," Alex informed him, grinning.

"What?"

"It's Saturday today," he went on. "You missed two days of school."

Lucas stared at him.

"Goddamn it."

Alex laughed and shook his head.

"Well anyway, I don't blame you," he went on. "I would skip school to get laid too."

Lucas spluttered, cheese spraying from his mouth in shock and Alex' laughter intensified.

"That's not why," Lucas insisted, managing to swallow before speaking.

"Uh huh."

"We didn't even have sex!"

Alex' brow furrowed.

"Really?" he asked. "But you're both guys. I always thought guys would like, jump the gun in these situations."

"Well, you know--stuff."

"Stuff?" Alex repeated. "That's your explanation?"

Face hot, Lucas did his best to change the subject.

"Anyway, did I miss a lot at school?"

"I want to know about gay sex," Alex pouted.

"I told you," Lucas said hotly. "We didn't have sex, just did other stuff."

Alex's brows rose in gleeful amusement and Lucas clapped a hand over his mouth.

"Well what about you?" Lucas deflected. "You and Grace are probably hooking up behind the bleachers."

"Behind the bleachers?" Alex repeated. "Really? What is this, Degrassi?"

"I don't know," Lucas said, confused. "I don't watch that show."

"So where is Will, anyway?" Alex asked. "I want to make a peace offering but I get the impression pizza wont work on him."

"No, old pizza only works on me."

"This pizza isn't old," Alex said, affronted. "Plus, I would get Will a fresh one."

Lucas smiled but the edges of his lips fell short and he set down his slice.

"Well, you'll have to drive for hours to get it to him," he said. "He moved away."

"What?" Alex asked slowly.

"He moved," Lucas said. "His status changed, or something like that. He's considered legally deaf now. But he doesn't know any sign language and he has to go to a special school and stuff and it's really far away."

It was nice to have the brief distraction of his friend but suddenly Lucas thought maybe he needed to be alone while his heart felt like it was getting crushed.

"Jesus," Alex said. "Are you going to do the long distance thing, or--?"

Lucas opened his mouth to answer but he didn't know what to say. They hadn't discussed it, after all.

His silence was enough though because Alex stood up and put an awkward hand on his shoulder in an attempt at comforting him.

"Well, I'll stay here," Alex said. "We can watch movies and order food or do whatever. Your choice."

Lucas shook his head.

"No," he said. "I think I want to be alone."

He could feel his emotions closing in around him, all the disappointment and hurt that he'd spent the last few days suppressing.

Alex shook his head.

"No," he said. "You need your friends. I'll call the others."

Lucas shuddered.

"Alex," he said. "I know you're trying to help but the last thing I need is to see Blake right now."

Alex pursed his lips.

"Probably true," he agreed. He pulled out his phone. "Just Grace, then?"

Lucas hesitated a moment and then nodded.

~

AN: *waves* Hi everyone! Thanks for reading and don't despair, their journey isn't over yet. :P

Also, I'm having fun with Alex. I like how mean he is. He and Blake would be the most savage duo on the block. 😎😎