" I hate you, Mom!"

Sahithya stormed off the place she once called home. Her heels clicked in an unrhythmic manner as she hurried down the corridor of the apartment complex. Tears rolled down continuously, and she sniffled and wiped her tears harshly now and then. Her heart squeezed as she waited for the elevator to arrive. Wiping her tears again, she tried to compose herself—what if someone took advantage of her vulnerable state again?

She had enough of everyone taking advantage of her, including her parents, her friends, and everyone she considered dear.

The large corridors felt suffocating, and time dragged as the elevator was still two floors above her level. All she wanted was to go away and never return. She was strong and independent and had enough financial reserves to sustain herself. As for her job, she would try applying within the same company but move across cities or continents if the opportunity presented itself.

The farther, the better.

When the elevator arrived, she pressed the button for the basement and tapped her feet impatiently as the machine took its sweet time to reach its destination. 

She sat in her car, took a deep breath and attempted to calm herself. She had to calm down if she had to move on - she was not returning to this place ever in her life. She was done with disrespect and abuse for the past twenty-eight years of her life, she had to stand up for herself.

Gathering herself, she started the car to go to a place unknown.

"Yes, Siri." Sahithya's voice was tired from crying, and her eyes were red and puffy. Concentrating on the road ahead, she answered the call on the Bluetooth connected to the car. "I left that place for good," she smiled, uttering the words that made her feel liberated. 

"Come over to my place," Siri said, the blurry sound of the television news and the clashing of the utensils she washed echoing in the background.

"Thank you for the offer, but no," Sahithya politely declined.

I can't be a liability like I was to my parents. No more depending on people.

"Come on, yaar," Siri pleaded, and Sahithya chuckled. She could imagine Siri squinting her eyes and pouting dramatically to convince her - drama queen, she thought. " I desperately need a roommate I can get along with," she revealed her true intentions.

"Maybe later. I want to spend some time alone," Sahithya requested, not wanting to disappoint Siri.

"Now, that's my girl. I'm ordering pizza. Call me when you're coming, okay?" Siri beamed.

"As you say," Sahithya smiled softly and disconnected the call.

She decided to go to the temple in the city centre. The temple of Dharmaraja and Draupadi Amma was a place where she sought solace whenever she wanted to escape from the harsh realities of life.

But today, she was going to thank them for instilling in her strength, resilience, and the will to leave behind everything that had confined her until today.

Leaving the people you called family was never easy; they charmed the world in their web of lies - the lies of a happy family when all she remembered was her parents indulging in alcohol and being abusive towards each other and her.

 Life was a web of lies, but strangely, she was attracted to the son of the Lord of Justice; his perseverance to always stay truthful to himself and everyone around him was a source of inspiration. She still remembered the tales her grandparents narrated while they were still alive, that was the only way the little Sahithya could stay sane, and humbled and grow up to be a better human than the people she was surrounded by. Those tales of resilience always gave her the courage to work her way up and flee from the cage she was trapped in. 

As the images of the god and goddess flashed before her eyes, a smile crept on her face. A sense of peace washed over her. She did not realise that, when she reached the temple, engrossed in thoughts, time had flown. 

***

Thank you!

If not for your grace, I would never have been brave enough to flee and spread my wings. There's none as kind as you, Amma; actually, Dharmaraya and you - can I ever be like you for even a bit in my life? 

It sometimes pains to call your mother a monster, but that's how I could describe her - and today, she crossed every limit by not only calling me a lady of pleasure but also wanting me to be one for one of her friends - I was offended and walked out with no second thoughts.

Tell me, Amma - have I made the right decision of never wanting to talk to her after she used those heinous words for the daughter she birthed?

I feel like an orphan despite having a mother! I am an orphan, Amma but strangely in your presence I feel like I have a mother I never had and in his presence a father that never existed before.

Guide me like you always have, Amma. Guide me, Dharmaraya, to rise and move on in life, find new beginnings, and grow from strength to strength.

Sahithya sat before the idols of Dharmaraya and Draupadi, pouring her heart out to the god and goddess. Her heart felt a little lighter than before. Resolute and resilient about her new journey, Sahithya prayed for a blessed new beginning in life.

"Sometimes, we need to learn to trust ourselves and destiny, dear daughter," an old lady said as she sat beside Sahithya.

"And what if you have lost trust in life's unpredictability?" Sahithya asked.

The two women gazed at the idols, watching as the devotees gathered to offer their prayers and circle the temple. The melodic sound of ringing bells filled the air, accompanied by the joyful notes of trumpets, while the priest gracefully conducted the evening's maha aarti. 

Faced with life's uncertainties, the young woman sought guidance while the old woman shared her wisdom. Dharmaraya seemed to inspire them to open up. Although Sahithya and the lady were focused on him, their hearts connected, and they craved a heartfelt conversation.

"We all experience that at some point in our lives," the lady chuckled warmly as the lively sounds of trumpets and drums filled the air, along with joyous chants celebrating Dharmaraya and Draupadi Amma. She moved a little closer to Sahithya, sensing the young woman could use some guidance during this uncertain time. "It's easy to forget that our experiences teach us valuable lessons. The truly wise are those who stand up for themselves, find their inner strength, and share joy and knowledge with others," she explained, her words drawing Sahithya in as she listened intently. 

The chants and instruments were inaudible; only the old woman's voice was heard - such was the power of words of wisdom.

"And as far as life's unpredictability, learn to accept what comes your way. We often want control and certainty, forgetting the beauty and thrill of uncertainty," the lady continued. 

By now, Sahithya had forgotten what she was doing and wanted to continue the conversation. The lady's words gave her a new perspective.

"But what about fear, Ajjamma? Fear that comes with it?" Sahithya sounded unsure. " What if I end up becoming like the ones I despise?" she asked this time as she fidgeted her fingers.

"Had Dharmaray feared becoming the monsters he fought against that day, we would not have tales about him that we admire," Ajjamma said with a cryptic smile and looked at Sahithya, who already had a thoughtful look on her face and looked at her.

Sahithya hummed absentmindedly as she thought over Ajjamma's words. It was indeed true that Yudhishtir was among the people who made the most questionable decisions, yet when one tried to understand its underlying purpose, one realised it was he who burnt in the fire for you.

"Would you like to join me for the distribution of prasada after the aarti?" the lady asked with a warm smile. Sahithya nodded, completely immersed in the beautiful proceedings unfolding before her.

***

Her heart felt lighter and peaceful as she joined the old lady and other volunteers in the temple to distribute the sacred offerings. Enthusiastic devotees devoured the Prasada, soaking in the aura of positivity and peace that embraced their hearts, bringing a sense of fulfilment to the moment.

Seeing people happy made Sahithya happier. It was a great distraction, and she slowly felt herself growing stronger and having the power to leave behind the painful episodes of her life.

"Akka, can you please bring the laddoos from the back kitchen? It's almost empty," a volunteer asked Sahithya as he took a pot of curd rice from behind and refilled the serving pot.

Sahithya entered the kitchen and searched for the packed laddoos. The enticing aroma of the laddoos and puliyogre captivated her senses. The mouthwatering food tempted her to abandon everything and savour the dishes being prepared.

Ah, how delicious! The laddoos were mixed in an aromatic sugary syrup flavoured with cinnamon, saffron, cardamom, and a hint of black pepper. The puliyogre sauce was made of tamarind, sesame seeds, and spices. The amalgamation of flavours made one forget about their worldly worries and submit to divinity as the flavours burst in one's mouth.

"Anna, where's the packed laddoos?" Sahithya asked one of the cooks, and he pointed to the back door.

She walked, and her heart had a nagging feeling about something that was about to change - a change she was unaware of but knew was awaiting her. The lights flickered in the room, and the back room was suddenly different. What had been a simple storage room where food was stored earlier now appeared to have intricate carvings that were characteristic of the inside of the temple. A golden light beamed and blinded her; covering her eyes by bringing her hands forward she tried to adjust to the light of the room.

The change was so sudden that she failed to process what happened around her, but she had to face whatever was before her.

Uncertain and unpredictable.

The room no longer smelled like the food she came to pick up; the scent of sandalwood and jasmine took over the aromatics of the spices. Pots and pans were replaced by auspicious florals and offerings. The plain and simple walls that housed the recipes of generations of cooks were now intricate stone carvings of incidents of the history that so happened.

Sahithya was too stunned to speak as she felt the light engulf her, engulfing her in an unknown world. The room was a glimpse of the world she was entering, and she prayed never to return to the world she had just left.

******

There goes the first chapter!

Hope it was an enjoyable read. Until then, take care and see you guys in the next chapter. 

Love Siya.