"You're not gonna walk?? What the hell Alec!" Lou screamed echoed in the library and all of the students turned their heads towards them and the librarian hushed them to be quiet. "Can't you get any more louder?" Alec snide back, silently wincing at the pitch of her voice. "If you want I would but trust me it won't get any more uglier than this." She pointed at her own throat which made Alec snorted with a smile. She always knows how to make Alec cheery in an inappropriate time.

"Alec seriously why not?" She asked again realizing Alec missed their rehearsal and Alec shrugged his shoulder as they walked out the library heading towards the small cafe to get their usual coffee orders.

"Is it because of him?" She asked again and Alec didn't exactly answer her. He just look down at his clasped hand together on the table. That night was horrible, even though it happens months ago but it was one of the painful night for him, he cried himself to sleep right after her got home and he never did heard from Magnus after.

True they work together in the same building but he was at the very top floor while Alec in a totally different floor. He did tried to get a glanced of him when he did his round around the office but Magnus never made eye contact with Alec, it seems like he himself tried his best to make sure of that.

"Why don't you talk to him, get things straight and work things out like you guys used too." Lou suggested but Alec shakes his head weakly pressing his lips together.

"Its nothing like that Lou, I made my own decision, their lives are way better without me in it. I brought nothing but darkness in their lives, I cause Rafe's life twice in danger and so does Magnus. I will never forgive myself if anything happened to them, its better this way." Alec explained and let out an long exhale feeling the heaviness released from his chest for a while.

"Sometimes its better to stick together than to be divided. It makes you guys stronger." Lou replied and Alec didn't say another word after, there's truth in there somewhere. He kept staring out the window leaving Lou rambling about the boy she met few days ago.

~~~ooo~~~

"SURPRISE!!!!" Alec was startle by a loud screamed of surprise after he opened the door of his home and found his family stood in the living room decorated with balloons and ribbons. "Happy graduation Alec!" Izzy spoke and run towards her brother embraced. Alec smiled and hugged her petite body in returned. "Congrats bro, although I must say its a little bit too late." Jace said and earned a slap from their mother behind his head. Alec had to smile at that gestured.

"Thanks mama." He said and went for her hug instead as she wrapped her arm around Alec's body. "Congrats son." Robert said holding out his hand for a handshake and Alec went for a hug instead. He could feel how Robert exhaled in relieve like the hug was long expected.

The night were filled with laughter and couple of fights between Jace and Izzy or Jace and Alec basically a siblings argument on who gives the better present or who's favorite and all. Alec tear open the boxes of gifts from his family one by one and he had such amazement on what they pulled through.

Izzy got him the new iPad Pro that he can use for his graphic arts when he starts working later. Jace got him a leather custom made watch with engraved on the back. Its beautiful beyond words. At the back it says, "Happiness can be found even in the darkest of time, if one only remembers to turn on the light." Alec looked at Jace with an annoyed look while Izzy grabbed the watch from his hand, she read them and looked at Jace with the same expression.

"Seriously? There's nothing else you could put, you put Dumbledore quote? What a nerd." Izzy remark and catch their parents in laughter. Jace was not amused by the comment. "Well you dated the biggest nerd ever, so jokes on you." Jace replied earning a gasp from literally all of them.

"What nerd?" Alec asked looking furious as ever.

"You didn't tell me you dating anyone!?" Maryse asked with a biggest smile on her face.

"Why am I not aware of this?" Robert asked with Alec looking at her nodding in agreement.

"You guys need to chill, like now. That's just a topic for another day, I promised." She said trying to look anywhere else other than her family. "Well if you both get married, I better be the best man." Jace added earning another gasped and Izzy looked at him with an angry look shaking her head, "You are dead!" Izzy said before she charged at him choking his neck.

Alec had to separate them both like a cat and let them sat beside him separately so they couldn't kill each other.

"Alec, the last gift is from us, so here." Maryse handed him a navy blue box a size of his palm. He took them and shake it wondering what's inside. He pulled the bow and opened the box finding an auto key. "A car? No way!" Alec smiled a happiest smile clutching at the key before it was taken away by Jace. "That's not fair! All I got from you guys when I graduated was bills that I needed to pay." Jace marked looking jealous as ever.

"That's because its all on you, we could have gone other places but you decided you want to have a wild night party with your friends so I'm not paying for that." Robert replied causing all of them to laugh except Jace.

"Uhm, thanks guys but I don't think I needed this." He said handing them back the key. He didn't even bother to check the design or even what kind of car his parents gave him. "What? Why?" Izzy asked.

"I made a decision and I know you guys gonna feel bad about it." Alec started looking at each and everyone 's faces. "I decided to move to New York, I have been offered a positioned there in one of the art company in restoring historical pieces. I replied them agreed on the offer. I'll be moving in next month if I found an apartment soon." He finished his words and earned nothing but silenced.

He knew exactly what they thought on New York, his hell and torment. "Alec, are you sure?" Jace asked concerned on his decision. He smiled nodding before he gripped his shoulder in assurance. Maryse stood leaving them all in the living room before heading towards the bedroom upstairs, stomping her feet on the staircase in hurry. Alec sighed as he stared at his mother leaving them with no words of agreement or disapproved.

"Whatever your decision is Alec, know that we all love you and we support you. You have your family now and you are not alone." Robert said tapping his shoulder and Alec nodded with a smile.

Alec couldn't bear his heart to talk to his mother but he had too, so there he stood in front of the door knocking a while ago waiting for responses but silenced. So he opened the door anyway finding his mother stood by the bed facing the window. Small light brightened the room only coming from the bed side table.

He walked slowly towards her and sat next to her on the bed. They both sat in silenced and before Alec could say anything, his mother spoke first. "Why New York? Out of all the places in this world, why there? Why the only place of your reason of suffering and darkest past?"

"Great view?" Alec responded with a shrugged before his mother pinch his side. "Not funny." She said before she joined him in a laugh. Alec took her hand and let her rested her head on his shoulder. "You can't ran away from your past, that's what I learnt. I can't keep hiding and so do you." He said and Maryse kept her silent listening to Alec.

"If you're not running from your past then why are you running from Magnus?" She asked removing her head from his shoulder. Alec looked down at their intertwined hand before he sighed, "That's complicated, I'm not running away from them, I'm simply keeping my distance. Its better that way. He moved on, so should I." He explained. "So why don't you?" She asked and their eyes locked into each other.

"When is the last time you kissed dad mum?" He asked and she looked away on the other side not able to have this conversation with her own son. "Exactly. No matter how hard we tried to forget the past, we can't. You out of all people should know. No matter where we go, people will always get hurt and if not, we are the one who keep hurting them. Every time I look at Magnus or Rafe, all I could see was that moment. Not the happier time we had together but the darkest moment. I can't bear my soul to see them get hurt by anyone, especially by me."

Maryse looked at him, tears started to collect in her eyes. "I understand." She said clenching her hand tighter in Alec's. "Thank you." Alec said nodding before kissing his mother on the forehead. "Maybe I could talk to your father about trading the car to an apartment in New York." She said and Alec replied with a smile on his face. He nodded before he hugged her body closed to his. "Sing me that stupid song again." He asked and Maryse snorted with a soft chuckled escape her lips.

Alec woke up early the next day, the day that he supposed to be at his graduation but he chose not to be there, his family knew and understand why he didn't have the feelings to walk and accept his degree. A soft knock were heard on the door so he dropped his coffee mug on the table before he went to the door.

After he opened, no one is at the door, he looked to the sidewalk and people are walking like usual morning passing his house. He looked down on the floor and noticed boxes with his name on it. He recognized that hand writing, it was Magnus. He took the box and bring them inside.

Jace was about to walk down when he saw Alec at the door holding the box. "What's that?" He asked, "Its from Magnus." He said and Jace stared at him as he took a seat on the couch and he joined him after. They both sat with the box on the coffee table and Alec took the card for him. "Happy Graduation Alexander, hope your hard work is payed off just the way you wanted." Alec read out loud and Jace snorted, "Mine is better." He said referring to the stupid Dumbledore quote he made on Alec's watch.

Alec opened the box and his heart broke into pieces, the first thing he saw was a picture frame and he know it well because it was the best day of his lives. It was a picture of him and Rafe with Magnus in the park. They look so happy that time, with Magnus capturing the picture of all three of them and Rafe sat on his lap, Alec on Magnus' chest soaking in the sun.

Tears dropped and fell on the frame before Alec clutched it tightly to his chest. He didn't bother if Jace saw him cried and he was actually glad Jace didn't say anything or makes joked on him but instead he rubbed his shoulder and handed him a letter inside. He placed the frame on his lap and opened the letter. It was crooked and sealed with a school glue so he knew who wrote them, it was Rafe.

Hey Alec, how are you? Happy graduation to you, daddy help me with this, he can't know what I write but I asked him to help me with the words. I just want to say I miss you, I hope you are fine, I'm fine but I know daddy is not. He keep say he's okay and he's fine but I know he's not. I could hear him cry in his bedroom and I think I saw him sleeping in your shirt. I might be little but I know enough, I stopped asking daddy about you since it made him more upset. I just hope that one day we could be a family again or maybe you and daddy can be friends again. I really miss you Alec, so much, I miss our piano lesson, our cooking together, our movies night. Nana asked about you but then she and daddy got into a fight and they screamed at each other. Wherever you are, I hope you got this letter, I made sure daddy give you this. I know he loves this picture so much that he doesn't want to give it to you. But I know you will love it even more. I love you Alec, hope to see you soon.

Rafe

By the end of the letter Alec had difficulty to breathe, the words are not what he expects it to be. He loves him, he loves them so much that it hurts him this much. He clenched his chest letting his tear drops like rain on his face. Jace hugged him and let him cried even more on his shoulder. He never thought he could cried even more since he has been doing it his entire life. "There's more." Jace whispered and pulled out a blue scarf from the box. Its plain cashmere scarf, so soft on his skin and the blue reminded him on blue sunny sky. There's a side note in it with Magnus hand writing written on it. He took the card and read them,

"Meet me at the place you saved my son. The scarf is too keep you warm before I have you back in my arms for my eternal warming embrace."

MB

Alec didn't think twice and wrapped the scarf around his neck. He took Jace's car key and headed for the door. "Go get him tiger." Jace said and Alec smile heading out from his house and drove to the place Magnus mention. The memory was too clear in his mind, the lake, the day he saved Rafe from drowning, that's where Magnus is waiting for him. Magnus is waiting for him, Magnus wants him back in his lives. The thought made him wonder, whether or not he should keep going, maybe he should turned back. But now he know Magnus is waiting, he must be freezing, its cold and its starts to winter soon.

The decision is battling inside of him but he found himself already running towards the lake. People are jogging and walking their dogs with their usual morning routine not bother with Alec's racing heart. As he arrived, no one with the usual specks of glitter or spike of hair noticed around. He kept looking around the lake but no where to be found. He caught his breath and rested on the stones with his hand in his head. How fool he thought himself to be running towards him, he probably would have left, no one would waited for someone who hurt them deeply.

"You came." A voice appears behind him and he immediately glanced back and stood on his long legs. There Magnus stood few feet away from him carrying a bouquet of roses so red that matches the color of blood. His other hand in his coat pocket and the same scarf he wore matches Magnus' gold scarf on his neck. His caramel skin glimmers under the sun and his hair spike up perfectly just the way Alec loves it. He's not wearing his usual suit but rather a long sleeves jumper and a black pants that hugged his long muscular legs with couple of white trainers. The coat wrapped nicely on him making his muscles bulged as he flexed it.

Alec didn't noticed he was caught staring when he saw Magnus smirking. He hoped he wasn't drooling at the sight and embarrassed himself in front of Magnus. "For you." He said handing him the roses and Alec took it in his hand and can't help but to smell it. "Thank you." He said looking at down at the roses unable to look at Magnus in his eyes.

"H-How are you?" Alec asked and he noticed Magnus' scratched his neck looking to the side but him, he's nervous. Alec always could read him unlike anyone else. "As good I can, I guess. How about you?" He asked him back and Alec smiled, "Fine." He answered simply.

"Shouldn't you be at your graduation right now?" He asked and Alec shook his head. "I'm not going. I'll have it mailed to me later." He said and Magnus eyebrow crooked in confusion. "Why?" He asked. "Not interested." He replied while shrugging his shoulder and silenced again invaded them. The only thing they could hear is the wind breeze and the leaves moving along. The laughter of children at the nearby park and chatters of people as they walked once and a while.

"If there's nothing else, I'll just head home then." Alec said turning around but was stopped when Magnus grabbed his arm and turned him back around. "Don't go, please." He begged and Alec looked into his brown eyes and noticed how the dark circles formed around it.

"I can't do this anymore Alexander, I can't sleep, I can't focus on anything other than you. I can't accept you moving on, or how easy you made it be." He said and Alec removed Magnus' hand from his arm. "Easy? You think its easy for me?" He asked furiously. "You have no idea how I have to deal with my nightmares without you, how I woke up every single night hoping you were there next to me. How every single time I heard a kids voice, I would hope it was Rafe's. How every lonely dinner I had I wished I spent it with you. Damn it Magnus, how can you possibly think it was easy for me."

Alec shoved Magnus away from him and handed him the roses before he walked away again. Magnus throw the flowers on the ground before he grabbed Alec again but this time Alec fought back and pushed him away. But Magnus won't budge and kept pulling his arm back and Alec tried his best to keep his tears from falling, fighting him off.

"Magnus stopped!" He said and pulled his arm away from him but he kept pulling him back to let Alec look into his eyes but Alec refused and keep fighting him. At last he did what he supposed do the last time they saw each other. He pulled Alec's face and pressed his lips on him. Magnus grabbed both of Alec's cheek and deepened his kiss as Alec struggled to be released but somehow he failed and fall into his kisses.

"Please, please don't go away anymore Alec, I couldn't live without you." Magnus whispered in between kisses but Alec couldn't form any words and instead he lay his head on the crook of Magnus' neck. His arm went around his shoulder and hugged him closed to his chest while he sobbed in his tears.

"Marry me." Magnus whispered in his ears and he immediately removed himself from his embraced. "W-what?" He asked innocently, unable to process the question in his thought. Magnus grabbed something in his pocket before getting on his one knees. He lay the box on his palm and opened them for Alec. The black box contained two platinum rings made just for him and Alec.

"Alexander Gideon Lightwood, there's nothing in this world that could make me happier than having you as my life partner, my soulmate, father of my son, and most importantly, the love of my life. I couldn't bear living another day without you anymore. I want to wake up each day and the first thing I want in this world is you, and the last thing I want to see in this world before I closed my eyes is you. Would you do me the honor of becoming my husband?"

Alec couldn't process anything Magnus said after marry me and he felt his brain shut down and the only thing he could see was Magnus and his moving mouth and the two perfect sculpted ring in front of him. He wonder how long he kept his silenced when he noticed Magnus starts to look worry himself.

"Yes."