Percy Jackson

They wanted to talk about me and I didn't want to talk about me, so I pointed out the fact that Annabeth was a councilor of like a 20 person cabin when she was 9.

Thinking it'd be nice to hang out with friends and get stuff done, everyone just went to my office as I worked on stuff and Grover was able to do stuff because like he's my second in command dude. Annabeth is third.

Well Chiron figured that everyone could get their like yearly checkups done while they're here. So he takes a few of them at a times. Which is most of them.

It's Frank, Nico, Leo, and myself. Okay?

"Hey, Percy," I don't know why Frank thought this was okay. But for whatever fucked up reason, he did. "Do you have a boyfriend?"

God's help us all, nobody thought he'd ask that.

I stopped what I was doing, and just looked at him for a second. We all did. Nico and Leo looked between Frank and I.

Like, what the fuck?

"I'm sorry," I said, confused to hell. "What did you just ask me?"

"Yeah," Nico backed me up here, and I loved him for it. "Have you met Percy, Frank?"

"Have you met you?" Frank made a pretty fair point. "It's just a question. I mean, you had to do something while Nico was doing... What did you do about that?"

"No, I just..." I shrugged, not wanting to come out yet. "I mean, it's New York City. I did other things. I don't... No."

•••
Nico di Angelo

Things got awkward because now I'm out and Percy isn't and ideally we'd be out at the same time. But that didn't happen.

Percy was taken next for his check up and Frank told us that he was 99% sure that Percy was gay. And I mean he had reason behind behind it.

But I felt weird because I'm not outing him, even if we're like dating now. That's rude, and we talked about it.

"I mean, sure, he's probably bi." Leo could sort of see it, but he was weird about it, too. I get why. "I wouldn't be that surprised if he was, but I think him being gay is kind of far-fetched. Do you know, Nico?"

I fibbed.

"Uh, I really don't." I let them down, lying plainly. "I've been here for a while, sure, but like... Percy and I got along for a week before stuff happened and we like stopped talking until last summer, really. I don't know him all that well. Like, outside of camp. So..." I shrugged again.

"He's not just making you keep it secret?" Frank really thought I was going to like out Percy.

"I... Leo beat the shit out of Jason for outing me last night." I point out to him. "So if he was, and he's most definitely not, I wouldn't even risk it. I know other things about people that I won't tell you because it's a secret."

•••
Leo Valdez

It's a miracle, Percy was able to find a guy willing to go out with Nico.

So with the dates Nico was going on, Percy and Nico became close friends really quick. They hung out all the time.

Without Piper and Jason here now, I hung out with Frank a lot. He's a cool dude..we haven't asked about Percy's sexuality since that day. It was kind of weird, sort of awkward.

But things were going well. For the most part.

After a few weeks, Nico and whoever the hell this dude was were kind of starting to get serious. It was a weekly thing. Saturday nights. And everyone was really open about it and Nico said that he wasn't going to like have us meet him her because he's out to very few people and his parents don't yet or whatever.

Which is fine. We didn't really care. After like the second date, it was just a routine thing.

Percy... Ever since we asked, it's just been weird. When I'm around him, I just feel like he's holding his breath and I want to ask, but I also know I shouldn't.

Really, whatever is going on with him isn't my problem. I shouldn't have to worry abojt it. If anyone here, Nico or Grover would. They're closest to him.

But he didn't really say much when we'd talk about the dates or I guess just anyone's love life in general. He just held his breath.

It's frustrating.

Like, it's obvious there's something there. Something is holding him back right now that he doesn't want to tell us or he isn't sure what it is and he won't get help for it.

Which, if it's just coming out, I'm not going to ask and push him. I want to help and tell him that we're here for him and that if he ever needs to talk, I'm there.

But I don't know how to do that without, you know, making it weird.

"The way you make it sound," Frank mentioned as we were in Bunker 9, just hanging out. "Sounds like you like him."

"I don't know," I responded. Because sure, Percy's fucking hot and he's really nice and whatever else, but I don't know if it's just general attraction or I actually like him. It's hard. "Maybe? I think it's more just the general of he's nice and he looks good and whatever else."

He raised an eyebrow, not believing me.

"I'm not going to swoon over him." I insisted, sighing "it's just frustrating. I wish he'd like come to one of us about it "

"You don't know that he doesn't already," the son of Mars pointed out to me. "I'm sure that if something's going on with him, Nico knows. Grover, too. I mean, neither of them are going to talk. But Nico and Percy starting hanging out at a weird time, right? That's probably had something to do with it. Nico said it himself, he didn't know Percy that well."

I shrugged, temporarily giving up on the situation.

He's just felt so far away lately; Percy has. And it's just kind of hard because I want to help but I know I'm not that close to him compared to others and I mean, he probably doesn't want the help.

After debating with myself for about 15 minutes, I decided to text him.

•••
Percy Jackson

It was late, Nico and I were in my cabin, just relaxing. We do this a lot.

Ever since Frank asked about me having a boyfriend, it's been weird. Like, I just don't know what to say when that sort of stuff comes up, so I don't say anything. It works.

Until Leo texts me, that is.

Leo : Hey
Percy: Hey, what's up?
Leo: Not much, just in Bunker 9
Leo: You're not around a bunch of people right now, are you?
Percy: No...? I'm in my cabin. Why?
Leo: Just curious
Leo: Uh
Leo: This is kind of weird
Leo: But are you okay?

For a second, I looked at my phone because I didn't really know how to respond. I wasn't sure what he meant by it. I couldn't tell what he was asking about. Me in general, or something else.

Like, I've been struggling with figuring out the whole coming out thing, but it's like...

I mean, Frank figured it out. And it's low key terrifying.

Percy: In reference to what?
Leo: You've just been really quiet lately. Which maybe that's normal for you now that camp has calmed down and all. But you just get really quiet sometimes when we talk about different things. I just wanted to make sure you were like, torturing yourself by not letting yourself just be you or whatever. Like what Nico did to himself with pretending to be straight and all.
Percy: ???
Leo: I'm just trying to figure stuff out, okay?
Leo: I just want you to know that like, if there is a problem, it's okay. You don't have to isolate yourself from us.
Leo: You've been like avoiding Frank and I lately, and I just have to think that we did something to trigger something. So I mean, I that's the case, I'm sorry. But I mean, we're all here for you. I feel like Nico proved that you should've have to hide. Maybe that's just me.
Leo: But were here for you, and I'm just worried that right now you're having some troubles that you don't want to talk about, but you should talk about.

I started to cry. This was my... Not worst nightmare, but it scared the shit out of me.

I showed Nico what he sent. Because I didn't think it was that obcious. Ever since they've asked, I just... Got scared.

Like, I want to be able to hold his hand and hug him and kiss him in public. But my fucking self confidence problems are kind of getting in the way. And as much as he means well, this doesn't help. It just gives me more anxiety about coming out.

Of course, I know that it's okay that I'm gay and there's nothing wrong with it. I'm well aware that my friends are okay with it and that I shouldn't have to worry.

But I just do. I always have. Even when I was little and I first kind of had a crush on a guy, it scared me shitless. I was 10.

I cried myself to bed that night because I knew that guys and guys just didn't date. That wasn't normal. And it scared me that I was even more of a freak.

For some reason, that just hasn't left.

I'm still scared shitless.