Thought I would try this out with one of my all time favorite songs. Hopefully you enjoy! ^~^

~~~~~

I know you're somewhere out there.

Somewhere far away.

I want you back.

I want you back.

Losing someone hurts. It hurts more when the person you lose was near and dear to your heart.

It's been a decade. A decade since I lost her. A decade since the entire course of my life was changed forever and not in a good way.

You may be asking yourself, "What the hell are you even talking about?"

I'm talking about the accident that killed my fiancé.

It was a clear autumn night. The day was Wednesday and the date was September fourteenth. I was taking my then girlfriend out to the beach since I knew that she loved it there so much. We were sitting together with sand in between our toes talking to each other in hushed voices while snuggling up to each other. Neither one of us wanted to be anywhere else in the world. At that moment, I thought that that it would be the perfect time to ask her a simple yet complicated question. I took a deep breath and pulled out a white box from my pocket. I told her how she had changed my life and that there was no one else in the entire world that I would rather spend the rest of my life with than her. After I told her all of those things, I opened the box to reveal a diamond ring.

"Will you marry me?"

The question is simple because there are only two responses that you can give to it: yes and no.

But the question is complicated because asking someone to marry you is a huge step in your life. When you ask someone to marry you, you're promising to commit to no one else but them and to be there for them in times that are both good and bad.

When I asked (Y/N) to marry me, I knew that we were both ready for this. We were both twenty-six years old and had known each other for four years. We had also dated for two of the four years that we knew each other.

"Yes, of course I'll marry you." I slid the ring onto her left ring finger as she pressed her lips to mine. For the first time in my life, I felt content with how everything was going. I was now a man planning to get married and was more than likely going to start a family with the girl that I had come to love so much over the past four years. Needless to say, I was on cloud nine and I thought that nothing could destroy me.

Then, something did destroy me.

"As soon as we get home, I'm planning the wedding!" (Y/N) smiled as she stared down at the ring that I had gotten for the occasion. "It's going to be a blast! We'll invite as many people as we can and then have a huge party! It'll be the perfect night!"

"Every night I get to spend with you is a perfect night." I grinned as I drove. My grin soon faded when I saw a swerving car approaching in the distance. "These fuckers need to learn how to drive a damn car."

"I know right?! It always seems like there are so many bad drivers out there these-"

"Oh my God!" The car was on a collision course with ours. I tried to swerve in order to avoid this from happening but it was no use. The car hit the direct front of the car and sent (Y/N) and I flying through the window. I guessed I blacked out after that because I remember waking up at the hospital with doctors and nurses hovering over me.

"Oh, you're awake." A doctor gave me a kind smile. "It's a miracle that you're even alive. We were actually going to take you off of your life support in a few moments."

My eyes widened. I couldn't believe that I was on life support. But my condition didn't matter to me. What mattered to me was (Y/N)'s condition.

"Where's my fiancé? " I croaked. It was so hard to speak but I forced myself to do it because I had to know where and how she was. "Is she doing okay?"

The smile immediately faded from the doctor's face. "I really hate to be telling you this." He sighed. "She didn't even make it to the hospital. The impact killed her instantly."

"What?" It was even harder to speak at that moment and I could feel my eyes fill up with tears. "No. She can't be dead."

"I know it's hard to believe. But she's gone."

"No! She can't be gone!" I blinked and fully formed tears escaped my eyes. "We were planning to get married and possibly start a family! We had plans to spend the rest of our lives together!"

"Life's but a kind and cruel mistress all at the same time." Little did I know that that those words would stick with me ten years later and they would keep echoing in my head like a song that you couldn't get out of your head.

My neighbors think I'm crazy.

But they don't understand.

You're all I have.

You're all I have.

"Do you know what today is?" I looked up at the moon. Tonight was a full moon, (Y/N)'s favorite. How fitting it was a full moon on this days out of all the other days of the year. "It's the ten year anniversary since you... left." I sighed and looked around. All my neighbors thought of me as was the crazy thirty-six year old guy who's unmarried, doesn't have a family, and spends his nights talking to the moon every single night even when a new moon is out that night. "I can't believe that it's been that long honestly. It doesn't feel like it's been ten years." I sighed. "Ever since that terrible night, time froze. I feel like I'm still stuck in that clear autumn night and we're sitting on the beach making small talk until I ask you to spend the rest of my life with me. I'm living that day every single day as if the accident never even happened. I won't lie to you when I say that I wake up every morning and pretend that we were holding each other close throughout the night in order to protect each other from any dangers that might come and try to tear us apart." I could feel tears forming in my eyes. "Can you even hear anything that I'm saying? If you can, do you stop whatever it is that you're doing and listen to me ramble about how much that I miss you or do you just shrug it off and move on? I've been doing this for ten years now and thinking about my messages to you not even reaching you breaks my heart." I wiped away tears that had fallen. "God, I want you back. I want to redo that night. I want to redo it so that I can save you. If I saved you, we'd be sitting out here with my arm wrapped around you while staring at this absolutely beautiful moon that's in the sky right now. The kids would be sleeping and we'd talk about our love. That's the way that life was supposed to be. But, as that fucking doctor told me ten years ago, life's but a cruel and kind mistress all at the same time."

At night when the stars.

Light up my room.

I sit by myself.

"Sean, don't turn on the light." The sun had just set and my room was nearly pitch black. "Pull up your blinds and let the stars light up your room. Trust me, you'll love it and wish that you'd started doing it sooner."

"Well, I guess there's no harm in trying it." I walked over to the only window in my room and pulled the blinds up all the way so that as much light from the stars could illuminate the room as much as possible. I then returned to my spot next to (Y/N) and pulled her close to me once more.

"Look, the stars are starting to come out." She smiled and turned her head towards the window. "This room will be beautiful in a few minutes. You just have to give the stars some time to wake up."

"The sun has gone to bed but the moon has awoken from its sleep." I also turned my head towards the window. "The sun needs rest too and the moon loves the sun so much that it takes its place every single night so that the sun can get some much needed rest."

(Y/N) chuckled. "That's very true. We really take the simplest things in life for granted. Without the sun, we wouldn't even be here."

"That's right." I kissed her nose as a few stars that began to twinkle in the night sky shined their light into my room. "I wouldn't be here loving you. The thought of that terrifies me."

"It terrifies me too." She confessed and buried her head into my chest. "I don't want you to leave me."

"I won't ever leave you." The room was getting brighter as the minutes came and went.

"I want you to promise me something." She placed her ear over my heart so that she could hear it beat in my chest.

"What do you want me to promise you?"

"I want you to promise me that we'll be together forever."

Little did I know, I would break that promise one year later. "I promise."

"Thank you. I love you."

"I love you too."

Talking to the moon.

Tryin' to get to you.

In hopes that you're on the other side.

Talking to me too.

"You always wanted to know what greeted you when death claimed you." I blinked as the calm wind blew through my hair. "You got your answer. Does that make you happy? Wait, are you even happy? I sure hope that you're happy. I wouldn't want you to be sad. Are you crying because you're wishing we could be together? I'd wipe away those tears if I could. You know that I would do anything to make you happy."

Or am I a fool.

Who sits alone.

Talking to the moon.

"I never knew that you liked stargazing." I was setting up a telescope that I had bought just for this occasion with (Y/N) in my backyard.

"Are you kidding? Stargazing is one of my favorite activities!" I looked through the telescope to make sure that it was in focus. When I saw that it wasn't, I messed around with the knob until it was. "I don't do it all that much anymore and that makes me super sad."

"Me neither. But that's mostly because I prefer to do it with other people but I can never find anyone that's interested in it."

"Story of my life." I sighed as I stepped out of the way of the telescope. "Ladies first."

"Wow, what a gentleman." (Y/N) grinned as she bent down and closed one eye so that she could see through the telescope. "Wow! This is so cool! I can see the moon up close!"

"(Y/N), it's called stargazing, not moongazing." I joked and let out a small laugh.

"Hey, you know me. I never go by the rules. I'm a little rebel." She grabbed ahold of the sleeve of my hoodie and pulled me over to her. "Look inside so that you can see the moon."

I did so. A smile formed on my face. "This is so cool! I can see the craters way up close!"

"See? I told you that it was cool but you didn't believe me." (Y/N) crossed her arms.

"Hey, I didn't say that I didn't believe you." I pointed out as I looked at her. "I simply said that we were stargazing and not moongazing."

"Yeah, okay, that's fair enough I suppose." She couldn't help but smirk. "But, like I said, I don't follow the rules."

"Actually, you said that you never go by the rules." I smirked back at her as I decided to tease her a bit. "Stop pretending to say things that you didn't (Y/N). How on earth am I supposed to trust you?"

She shook her head but still kept a smile on her face. "You are so lucky that I love you because if you were anyone else, I would've like shoved you or something."

Oh.

I'm feeling like I'm famous.

The talk of the town.

"You honestly wouldn't believe the things that people say about me these days." I sighed, never taking my eyes off of the moon. "They say that I've gone mad. Maybe they're right. Maybe I have indeed gone mad." I paused. "Even though I'm not sure about my mental state, I'm sure about the state of my heart." I wiped away tears for probably the one-hundredth time tonight. "It's broken and waiting to be healed. You stole it from me and I don't want you to give it back until you've fixed it, okay?"

They say I've gone mad.

Yeah I've gone mad.

But they don't know what I know.

"Guess whose birthday's today?" I asked (Y/N) excitedly as we were taking an afternoon stroll around town.

"Hm, I don't know." She pretended like she was completely clueless about the whole thing. "I may need a hint of two."

"I don't have time for this hint bullshit. It's your birthday!" Today was my girlfriend's special day and I was going to make her feel loved because the truth of that matter was that she was loved by me. I smiled like an idiot as I handed her a jewelry box that was wrapped up with pink polka dot wrapping paper. "I got you a present! Go ahead and open it!"

She stopped in her tracks and let go of my hand so that she could admire what I had given her. "Sean, you really didn't have to give me a present."

"I know but I wanted to do it!" My impatience was starting to get the best of me. "Now hurry up and open it! We don't have all day!"

"Don't rush me!" She smiled as she tore the wrapping paper off of the box and stuffed it into her pocket after crumbling it up into a ball so that she could throw it away later. "Sean, is this what I think it is?" She didn't bother waiting for a response as she opened the box. "Oh my God, you actually got me that necklace that I was looking at when we were at the mall the other day! I was going to buy it but then I said that it was too expensive, which it was." She looked up at me upon realizing that I had spent a lot of money on her gift. "You didn't have to spend so much money on me. Just a hug and some quality time together would've made me just as happy."

"Yeah but I knew that that getting that necklace would make you way happier." I grinned as I took it from her so that I could put it around her neck. "Besides, it was worth spending all of the money on it just to see the smile that you had on your face when you first saw it. All of the money in the world couldn't buy the smile that you had on your face at that moment." She held up her hair so that I would have an easier time putting on the necklace. After fumbling with the clasp for a few moments, I placed the necklace around her neck and placed the clasp in the hole where it wouldn't make the necklace too tight but also too loose. After I had successfully put it on, (Y/N) let go of her hair and turned towards me only to throw herself into my arms. I stumbled a bit at the sudden impact that her weight had on me but I managed to not fall and successfully hug her while holding her in my arms.

"Thank you for the wonderful gift." She planted a kiss on my cheek. "You have officially made this the greatest birthday ever."

"That's what I was going for." I pressed my lips to hers a moment later and she instantly responded to my action by kissing me back. I placed her back down on the ground and ran my fingers through her hair. I didn't stop kissing her until I needed to stop in order to draw in a breath.

"I love you. I want you to know that." I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her as close as she could possibly get to me.

"Oh, I do know that don't worry." She smiled and placed her hands on the sides of my face. "It's the fact that I'm most proud of knowing."

'Cause when the sun goes down.

Someone's talking back.

Yeah, they're talking back.

"Looking back, I wish that I had treasured all those moments that we spent together just a little bit more." I still didn't take my eyes off of the moon. It was as if I was worried that if I looked away, I would miss (Y/N) possibly appearing right in front of my eyes. "You were right when you said that we take the simplest things in life for granted. It's such a shame that I'm realizing it over ten years after you told me that."

At night when the stars.

Light up my room.

I sit by myself.

"You know, I didn't think that you were the kind of guy to drink coffee." (Y/N) smiled as she sat down across from me after receiving her coffee.

"I honestly can't function without some sort of caffeine inside of me." I shrugged as I took a sip of the latte that I had ordered.

"Same here honestly. I come here every single morning, order my usual, and then head off to face whatever the day has in store for me. I don't usually sit in here but, as you can see, I've made an exception for you."

"I feel honored." I smiled as I put my coffee down. "So, tell me about yourself."

"Well, my name's (Y/N). I'm twenty-two years old and I graduated college with a degree in photography last year. I travel around a lot in order to get all kinds of photography jobs all while seeing what's out there in the world at the exact same time." She smiled as she talked about the things that she did. "Enough about me. I want to hear about you."

"Me? There really isn't that much to me."

"Yeah there is." She insisted. "There's something to everyone. There's all kinds of things that makes a person who they are."

"I can't deny that." I paused while I thought of what I was wanted to tell her. "My name's Sean and I'm also twenty-two. I also happened to graduate college but not with a degree in photography. I graduated with a teaching degree in music. I live here all year round and I give out individual guitar lessons to anyone no matter what age they are."

Her smile got bigger as she listened to me. "See? I told you that there was something to you."

"Yeah, you were right about that." I smiled back at her. "I'm not going to pretend like you weren't."

Talking to the moon.

Tryin' to get to you.

In hopes that you're on the other side.

Talking to me too.

"There was never a dull moment without you." I was still staring at that damn moon. "You always had a smile on your face and your goal in life was to make people happy because that's what made you happy. I wish that I was just like you. You had flaws just like everyone else but you were able to embrace them. That was something that truly inspired me."

Or am I a fool.

Who sits alone.

Talking to the moon.

"The sunset is absolutely beautiful." (Y/N) grinned and stood up. "It's picture worthy, that's for sure."

"I guess it really is a good thing that you always have your camera with you." I chuckled as I stood up and watched as she grabbed ahold of her camera and fumbled around with it before she placed it against her face. "Maybe I won't tease you about it anymore."

She was silent as she took photos of the sunset until it was completely gone from the sky. Once it was gone, she turned off her camera. "Don't say that because I know you will." She couldn't help but smile.

"You're right. I will." I smiled back at her. "I can't help that you're different from the rest."

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean?" (Y/N) asked as she crossed her arms.

"It's supposed to mean that you're different from the rest in a good way." I wrapped my arm around her and pulled her close to me. "Being like the rest is boring anyway."

"Hey! Don't steal my quote you jerk!" She broke out of the hold that I had on her and laughed as she lightly shoved me. "That's not very nice! Get your own quote!"

"Oh, you are so lucky that you have an expensive necklace and camera around your neck right now."

"Why exactly am I lucky?"

"Because I would totally shove you back if you didn't."

She smirked and rolled her eyes. "Of course you would Sean McLoughlin. That's just how you are, aren't you?"

"You better believe it baby." I grinned.

"Oh I believe it alright." She grinned back.

Do you ever hear me calling?

(Ah) Oh oh oh.

(Ah) Oh oh oh.

"I'm running out of things to say. I don't know what else to say that I haven't said about a thousand times over. I'm just... All of these memories are coming back to me but that's normal when it's the day that you left this world... and me." I ran a hand through my hair. "Do you ever get flashbacks of the time that we spent together? That's totally what's happening to me right and it's honestly bittersweet."

'Cause every night I'm talking to the moon.

Still trying to get to you.

In hopes you're on the other side.

Talking to me too.

I stood up at that moment and felt a surge of energy that I haven't felt in ten years. "(Y/N), I'm going to do it. I'm going to finally accept that you're gone and just because that your life ended, that doesn't mean that mine has to. I'm still here and I need to live through every single day like it's my last day, just like you taught me to do. I never told you this but I talked to this girl a couple of times at the coffee shop. It's a actually the same one that we always went to. Anyway, she works there because something happened in her life and she's trying to pick up the broken pieces of herself just like I am. She's currently in college, despite being around my age, and plans to really get her life back on track. I-I'm going to try and make her my friend. Maybe we'll end up together. I'm not afraid of you being jealous because I've finally realized  ten fucking years later that moving on was what you wanted me to do the entire time. I would want you to do the same if the roles were reversed."

Or am I a fool.

Who sits alone.

Talking to the moon.

"Hey, sorry I missed your call. Leave a message after the beep and I'll make sure that I get back to you as soon as I possibly can."

After I heard the beep, I spoke, "Hey, it's Sean. You know, the one from the coffee shop. Listen, I know that I'm calling really fucking late at night but I did a lot of thinking tonight. I brushed you to the side like you didn't matter and I didn't really give you a chance. I'm sorry about that. Let's just say that I've been a broken man these past ten years and I'm finally starting to pick up the broken pieces of myself and put them back together again. Anyway, the point I'm trying to make here is that I want us to be friends and really get to know each other. Call me back if you're ever interested. I'm free pretty anytime."

I hung up after that and shoved my phone into my pocket. I looked down at my left hand at that moment. I was wearing the wedding ring I was supposed to receive the day of my wedding with (Y/N). I always kept it on because it made me feel like she was always with me.

But I've now come to realize that I don't need this ring to make me feel like she's always with me.

*****

"Hello love, I don't think I've been here since the day they buried you." I blinked as I stared down at the headstone that marked the spot where my fiancé was buried. "I want to give you something so that you'll never forget me." I took the ring off of my finger and placed it right on top of the headstone. "I've finally accepted that you're gone and now I don't need that silly old ring to know that you're always with me." I grinned. "You may technically be dead but you're forever alive in my heart, where you belong." I planted a kiss on the headstone. "I love you. Thank you for everything and I'll see you on the other side. Maybe I won't see you tomorrow, next week, next month, next year, or even twenty years from now. But mark my words (Y/N), we will see each other again." I smiled and took one last glance at the headstone before I began heading home. "This isn't goodbye. It's simply "I'll see you soon.""

Thank you Sean. I love you too.

I know you're somewhere out there.

Somewhere far away.