I can't believe it...

    I thought to myself as I started pulling off my Nike shoes which were beginning to look extremely dirty. I unzipped my sweatshirt and rested it on my chair. Then, I sprinted up the stairs to my bedroom.

     I shut the door behind me and immediately plopped on my bed and started staring outside my window. As I stared firmly, I noticed that the breeze slowly moved my curtains.

A warm tear rolled down my cheek as I held my legs close to my chest. I rocked back and forth and tried to take my mind off of everything.

     "Why?" I muttered softly, "why me?"

   Who knew that love could hurt so bad?

     "I hate my life." I mumbled with a tone of anger and annoyance in my voice as I thought about our relationship.

    I lifted myself from my bed and made my way to my dresser where I had placed pictures of my friends and Ethan. I groaned and grasped the image in my hand. I walked over to the garbage can in preparation to throw it out, but a strange feeling usurped me. I could not let myself throw it away. I tossed the picture of us hugging into my closet and ripped up the pictures we took in a photo booth on a play date we had when we were maybe seven and threw those in my trash can.

I felt like a mother sending her youngest child to college. It was definitely a bittersweet feeling. I glanced down at them one last time and then I turned around, leaving the other half of the world behind me. No more Ethan, no more a lot of things.

     When I turned around, realizing what I had done, I began to bawl like a baby all over again.

     Ugh, I hate the month October.