"Everything alright?" Ringo asked as I took a cigarette. He offered me a light and I took a drag. 

But before I could answer, Harry stepped out into the balcony abruptly, stopping any continuation of our conversation. 

I smiled as Harry came over and stood by me as he pulled out a cigarette from his own pack.  We talked a bit about the California weather as our cigarettes slowly disintegrated. 

After a few minutes, I noticed Harry giving Ringo a look, which I pretended not to notice, and a few seconds later Ringo excused himself and went back into the house. 

This left Harry and me by ourselves once again.  I could see the others from where I was standing so that meant that they could also see us.  I discretely walked over to the other end of the balcony with the excuse of admiring a rose bush that was growing in the garden.  Harry followed me and I could feel his body standing very close behind.

 I felt his arms on my shoulders before he gently turned me to face him.  I knew what was on his mind.  We had been interrupted earlier and this was the perfect follow up to what we had started. 

“This isn’t my life anymore Harry.” I heard myself say abruptly.   “My priorities have changed.  It has been years since I’ve seen John or Ringo or have been in this type of atmosphere with people like you.”

He chuckled a little. “People like me?  What kind of person am I according to you?”

“I didn’t mean it like that.” I smiled. “What I meant is that you’re a musician…you’re a celebrity….you’re in the public eye…being involved in this environment…in this atmosphere takes a certain type of person…and that’s not me anymore.  I have different priorities now.”

He looked at me for a second before responding.

“Don’t you think making yourself the number one priority once in a while is good for you though?” he asked as he began moving his finger tips up and down my arms. 

In all honestly, ever since Elise was born, she had been my number one priority, as it should be, but because of it, I had found myself without any male companionship whatsoever.  Having gotten back in touch with John had made me yearn for my past, not because I didn’t love or regretted Elise, far from it, but because I had forgotten what it felt like to be a woman and not just a mother.   I looked at Harry, not really convinced that I should put myself as a priority.

He smiled.  "Look, I am not asking you to marry me...just one date...I won't even get all dressed up for it so we can keep it casual."

That made me smile.  Was I seriously considering this? It was hard enough for me to believe someone was actually asking me out on a date, but even more so that this man was a friend of John...the father of Elise...who minutes ago had told me to stay away from him.

"Well...you should know that I have a daughter and..."

"If you can't find anyone to leave her with, we'll plan a child friendly outing." Harry cut me off.

If a man asking me out was unbelievable, a man being okay with taking along my daughter on our date was unreal.

I chuckled.

"C'mon...." Harry urged.

Suddenly, the door to the balcony burst open and John peered out.

"We're about to eat..." John said rather coldly.

I saw Harry shoot him a look, but John completely ignored him.

"Well...c'mon then...." John repeated.  He stayed there looking at us until we started heading his way.  He let me through and rudely cut Harry off by walking straight in front of him.  He put his hand on my shoulders and directed me to the dining room.

"Found her." John said with a chipper voice. "Let's eat...I'm starving."

Harry and I found two open seats which had been strategically left separate.  I sat in between Ringo and John and He was sitting between May and Keith.  

     ***

 Dinner was rather long, but it was filled with lots of food and even more drink.  The tension that seemed to have stirred between John and Harry in the balcony had disappeared.  They were joking and laughing for the rest of the night.  When we finally made plans to sleep for the night, the sleeping arrangements were carefully made.  I was bunked with Ringo and Keith and Harry were rooming together.  Although I didn't mind being roommates with Ringo, I chuckled at the thought of John purposely doing that.  I guess it was normal since Ringo and I were friends and knew each other for years, but had it been John who had an interest in a girl, he would have ended up sleeping in the same bed as her, I'm sure.

As I got ready for bed, I took a notepad and scribbled my contact information.  I quickly walked over to Harry's assigned room and knocked lightly, hoping it would not cause John to come out into the hallway.  Luckily, Harry was the one to answer the door and may I add with a very surprised look on his face. 

"Sorry...but I already have a roommate for the night." He smiled.

"I wasn't looking for a roommate, I already have one who I am very fond of actually...but if you're still interested in that date, you can stop by on Friday around 7ish at this address."  I said handing him the small paper.

He read it and smiled.  "Very interested."

"Alright then...see you then.  Have a good night." I said turning back and walking to my room.

"One question Mirel..."

"What's that?"

"Shall I plan a child friendly date or an...adult date night?

"Why don't you just plan for a friendly adult date night." I said as I reached the door to my room. 

"Will do." I heard him laugh as he went into his room and closed the door.

***

The next morning I woke up to the sound of Ringo snoring.  I figured everyone would still be sleeping and I was right.  The hallway was empty and dark.  I went into the living room and grabbed my shoes.  In the kitchen I left a note thanking everyone for their hospitality and hoping we could do it again soon. 

I drove straight to my parent's house and found Elise eating breakfast at the dining room table.  I walked over to her and gave her a kiss on the head. 

"Hey there...what is grandma and grandpa spoiling you with this morning?" 

"Cereal...you want some mommy?"

"Sure." I said leaning down and letting her feed me a spoonful of cereal.

As I munched away, I gave both my parents a kiss on the cheek. 

"So...did you have a good time?" My mom asked while I served myself a bowl of cereal.  We were on the other side of the kitchen and I could see my dad playing with Elise.

"Yes...it was a lot of fun.  It was weird though...seeing John and May together...I felt a little nostalgic...somehow feeling like that should have been me."

My mother sighed.  "I thought we had already talked about this Mirel."

"No...it's nothing like that mom...I know where I stand when it comes to John... But in other news...I do have a date...so I was hoping you could take Elise again on Friday?"

Mom looked at me.

"No...it's not with John." I continued.  "It's actually with a friend of his." I said as I took a spoonful of cereal. 

Mom was not convinced. 

"Don't think I don't read the papers.  I know what kind of people John is hanging around with.  He's been on the news for goodness sake!  All that drinking has caused a lot to talk about."

"I know what the newspapers say...but John has always liked to drink...it was just a guys night out with a few too many drinks." I said trying to defend John...and Harry for that matter...

“It's just a date mom...I'm not going to marry the guy!" I said smiling and repeating what Harry had told me.  "I just want to go out on a date..." I said feeling like I was a teenager again asking permission to go out.

"Of course we'll take care of Elise..." Mom said finally.  "So what are you planning on wearing?" She asked as we walked back to the table. 

***

I hadn't heard from John since leaving his house, but I had heard from Harry.  He called me the following afternoon and told me he had arranged a casual date night.  Dinner, a movie and then drinks afterwards.   I told him to give me a call when he was on his way to my apartment so I could then take Elise to my parent’s house.  They didn’t live very far away and since Harry was coming from Santa Monica, it would give me enough time.

I had never really listened to Harry's music all that much, but I found myself in a music store buying some of his past records.  The guy behind the counter was very nice, telling me what his favorite songs were and suggesting other albums I should buy. At first I thought he was just being extra nice so he'd sell more, but when he gave me my receipt, I saw he had written a note, with his phone number asking me to call him if I was interested in going out.  I didn't realize this until I was heading out the door.  I could feel my face getting flustered.  I didn't want to look back, but I sheepishly did and found him looking back at me with a big smile.  He motioned for me to call him before I turned around and kept walking. 

What was this?  I hadn't had a date in years and now all of a sudden I had a date lined up with none other than Harry Nilsson and a possible future date with the cashier of my local record store who went by the name of Benjamin.  Apparently I was giving off some kind of good vibe...a vibe I hadn't given off in a long time.  I walked home thinking about this and couldn't help but smile.  I remembered what it felt like to be flirted with, to be asked out, to be attractive to a man and feel attracted by a man. When I got home, Emma was there with Elise.

"Did you find what you were looking for?" She asked when I came in. 

 "Yes...and a little something more." I said giggling and handing her the receipt.

"Ohhh...look at that..." She laughed. "Are you going to call him?"

"Maybe...but not today...it just doesn't feel right making another date when I'm going out with another man tomorrow."

"Mommy...are you going to go play with John?" I heard Elise say from the corner of the room.

 I needed to remember that Elise was old enough to understand what was going on around her.

"No sweetie...I'm not going to play with John."

"I like John....he's fun." She said bringing me a cup of tea and serving it with her toy kettle.

"Do you want a cup of tea too Aunt Emma?"

"Of course!" she smiled.

"Who will you be playing with then?" Elise continued

"His name is Harry.  He is a friend of John's."

"We should all go to the playground and swing on the swings...that was fun." Elise smiled.

"Well this is grown-up play time.  You're going to stay with grandma and grandpa and play with them, remember?"

Elise pouted.

"Oh come on Elise...you don't want to go with Harry and your mom.  It's going to be boring.  They're going to be at a restaurant where you can't even jump or dance or play...remember how boring it was to go last week when we had to go with your uncle Franz?  Wouldn't you like it better if we stayed with grandpa and grandma...we always have fun there, right?" Emma explained to Elise.

"Yes we do.  Can I take Fred?" She asked me.

"Only if you take good care of him." I said. "He's mommy's favorite bear...he's been with me for a very long time."

"I will.  I promise." Elise said as she ran to my room to pull Fred from the bedstand I had him on.

"Thanks." I said looking at Emma

***

I took Elise to the park the afternoon of my date with Harry.  I wanted her to run around and play before I took her to my parents’ house.  There were a lot of children that afternoon and she quickly made friends with a group of them.  They played for a couple of hours before we went home.  

“You look tired, sweetie…” I said noticing her exhaustion while we drove back to the apartment.

“I don’t feel good mommy.” She responded.

“You probably burned a lot of energy running around.  As soon as we get home, you can eat something and take a nice shower.” I said. 

By the time we got home, however, Elise was looking miserable.  I carried her into the house and laid her on the couch.  I put my hand on her forehead and saw she was burning up.  I ran into the bathroom and soaked some handkerchiefs with cold water and placed them on her to try and cool her off. I took her temperature and when I saw how high it was, I ran to the phone and called Emma. 

“Emma…it’s Elise.  She’s burning up with a high fever.  She was doing just fine a few hours ago.  She ate before we left to the park and she was running and playing with the other kids; it was cloudy all afternoon so the heat wasn’t too bad. I’ve put cold compresses on her, but they don’t seem to be doing much of anything.” I rambled quickly. 

“Calm down.  How high is her fever?”

“It’s 103.6 and she’s starting to have difficulty breathing.  She just started wheezing.”

“Did she eat anything while she was at the park?”

“No…not that I know of.” I answered into the receiver.

“Elise…did you eat anything with the other kids at the park?  Did they share any of their snacks with you?” I asked as I got closer to her.

“Yes… Michelle gave me some of her chocolate.” She said slowly.

“She had chocolate Emma…but she’s had chocolate before.”

“Did it have any nuts, any fruits, anything that could have caused an allergic reaction?"

“Elise did the chocolate have anything else?"

“Yes. It was crunchy when I chewed it. ” She responded.

“Emma, it must have had some kind of nuts in it.”

“Take her to the hospital…she’s probably allergic to whatever nut was in it…the fever might be the first symptom, but if you say she started wheezing, the allergic reaction may be affecting her breathing.  I’ll meet you there. “

I hung up and tried to stay calm.  I didn’t want Elise to get worried.  I quickly grabbed my purse and frantically started searching for my keys. As I found them, the phone rang again.

“Emma?” I asked.

“No…it’s Harry…I was going to let you know I may be a little late picking you up.”

“Harry…I can't talk right now.  I am on my way to the California Medical Center.  My daughter had an allergic reaction and she’s running a high fever and having difficulty breathing. Thanks for understanding.  I gotta go." I said panicking and hanging up the phone before Harry could say anything. I quickly rushed to Elise and got her into the car.  My nerves were getting the best of me.  My heart was pounding as I drove to the hospital.  I could hear Elise gasping for air.

“Hold on baby…we’re almost there. “ I said reaching over to her and rubbing her leg. 

After what seemed like an eternity, I pulled into the hospital and as fast as I could I took Elise out.  

“Please help me!” I yelled coming into the hospital.  A nurse immediately came to me and called to the others.

“She’s running a fever and now she can’t breathe…I think she may have had an allergic reaction.” I said hysterical.

“Calm down ma’am…we’ll take it from here.” The head nurse told me as she took Elise from my arms and placed her on the rollout bed that had just been brought out.  They immediately put an oxygen mask on her and began rolling her away.  I followed her but was stopped by the nurse, telling me I couldn’t go any further.

“The doctor is going to take care of her.  I promise.  We’ll let you know as soon as we know something.”

I waited for about 15 minutes in the waiting area before I saw Emma walk in.

"How is she?" She asked as she gave me a hug.

"I don't know....they won't let me go in there.  Maybe you can convince them since you're a doctor..." I pleaded

Emma walked up to where the receptionist was and asked to talk to the head nurse.  When she came out I vaguely heard Emma telling her she was a doctor, but the rest of the conversation was a blur to me.  I couldn't help thinking about Elise and the possibility of losing her. 

I saw Emma walking back and I met her half way.  "What did they tell you?  Is she okay?  Can I see her?"

"The nurse says the doctor has stabilized her breathing and they are working on reducing the fever.  As soon as they get the fever down, they'll let you go in and see her.  It looks like it was some sort of reaction to something she ate.  It was affecting her breathing pretty bad and to top it off the fever was really making things bad."

"Oh my God Emma..." I said sitting back down.  "I don't know what I'd do if I lost Elise." I said with tears falling down my cheek. 

"Calm Down Mirel...you did the right thing bringing her here. She's going to be fine.We just have to wait."

Emma and I continued to wait to go in and see Elise; it was unbearable.  Emma even went up to talk to the nurse again, but was told we needed to wait until the doctor gave the order. 

I had my face in my hands, worried sick about my little girl, when I heard Emma's voice.

"Mirel." She said softly.

"Hmm?" I responded looking up at her.  She motioned to the other side of the room.  I turned around to look, hoping to see the doctor, but it wasn't the doctor...it was John.