The song that originally inspired this "oneshot" was "Watching for Comets" by Skillet. The time has finally come for some Sparksize! :D

Warnings: Some blood and depression

Capsize's laugh brought me back to the present. I'd just asked her if she'd like to see my rod. She'd given me the strangest look before I pulled my fishing rod from behind my back. I wasn't sure how I'd managed to space out in that short of a time, but I shrugged it off and laughed with her.

Capsize took the fishing rod and turned it in her hand appraisingly. I'd done the enchanting myself and was quite proud of it. She handed it back with a teasing glint in her eye. "Tis a very nice rod, but I've seen better."

"What? When?" I asked, a little put out.

She grinned and dropped below deck, reappearing a moment later with a worn fishing rod with what looked like the exact same enchantments as mine. "Oh, so by better you meant worn out," I teased.

"No, I meant better. I've used this to pull fish big enough to swallow you whole," Capsize boasted.

I laughed at that. "I knew you were a pirate, but I didn't think you were one for fish stories, Cap."

Capsize did not look amused as she answered. "And what have you caught, Sparklez? If that rod's seen use, I be a seagull."

"I'll have you know I've done plenty of fishing," I defended, avoiding the question of whether this rod had ever been used—which it hadn't.

We glared at each other for a few minutes, neither of us willing to back down from our boasts. Finally Capsize broke the silence, all the while keeping me pinned under her steely brown eyes. "There be only one way to settle this, matey."

"And what's that?" I asked, trying not to sound nervous. I thought she might be having fun with me, but I wasn't confident in my guess. I'd already misjudged Capsize's temper a few times in the week the pirates had been here.

"Fishing contest: first to catch any fish, any size wins," She said, serious expression finally breaking into a grin. "'An I think we be making it more interesting with a little wager. What do you say?"

"Oh, you're on. What's the wager?" I asked as we headed to the starboard railing where a bucket of chum from the previous night's fishing sat.

Capsize pretended to examine the small fish head she pulled from the bucket before fixing it to her hook. "You win, and I give you some booty." I knew the pirates kept a stash of gold and diamonds, but not even Tom and Tucker had been able to figure out where they'd hidden the loot. Rubbing it in my friends' faces would make the victory plenty sweet, even if it was a small gem. I nodded my agreement to the prize, and Capsize continued in a level voice, "I win, and you join me crew for life."

Oh. I looked at Capsize carefully, wondering what she was playing at. She'd been picking at the way I handled myself shipboard since we'd met. I thought she'd hated me after that captain joke I made when we first met and was only now beginning to tolerate me. For once she wouldn't meet my gaze, staring out at the water instead. If I didn't know any better... Nah.

"Sure," I said with a shrug, watching out of the corner of my eye as Capsize's face lit up for a split second. The smile was gone as quickly as it appeared, replaced by determination. I picked a bit of chum to bait my hook, unconcerned. I mean, it's not like I'm going to lose. "Now let's fish."

Capsize's disappointment when I caught a fish after only ten minutes almost made my victory feel like a loss. Come on, Jordan; she challenged you. You shouldn't feel bad. I tossed my small fish back into the water while Capsize disappeared to her cabin to fetch my prize. In the minutes she was gone, I found myself wondering what life as a pirate was like. I had spent time on boats before, but never on a long sea voyage. I supposed how the trip went really depended on who was shipboard with you. If you were always at each other's throats, the trip was doomed to be miserable. If you were with friends though... I smiled at the thought that Capsize apparently thought we'd get along if she wanted to be stuck on a ship with me for months at a time. Maybe she didn't hate me after all.

I halted my musing when I realized the sky had turned overcast and grey. I frowned and looked up at the clouds. Where did those come from? I couldn't say why, but they bothered me, as if some part of me knew they shouldn't be there.

I heard footfalls on the planks behind me and allowed myself to forget the unsettling clouds. That will be Capsize, I thought. "Hey Cap, what took you so long? Trying to find me the biggest piece of booty?" I teased as I turned around.

There was Capsize holding a diamond the size of a marble in the palm of her hand, grinning at me. As I reached out to take the offered gem, I noticed a smear of red on its polished surface. Examining the gem more closely, I recognized it for blood. The smell hit me for the first time then. Blood and burnt metal, sulphur and smoke. I choked on the stench as I looked up in horror. Capsize wasn't standing happy and healthy anymore. Now she held a hand to a scorched and bloody wound through her abdomen. Her pain-filled eyes fluttered closed, and she crumpled. The figure behind her pulled her back and over his shoulder before I could catch her. Furia. The general of Dianite's army stood there arrogant and triumphant with his golden sword still sizzling with Cap's blood. Flames flitted across his molten skin, catching the planks of the deck where they touched. His glowing eyes brimmed with disdain as he laughed at my expression.

"No!" I can't let him take her. Not again, I thought frantically, trying to find a way to get to them across the now blazing deck that stretched between us. The flames seemed to anticipate my movements, cutting me off just as I thought I might have found a way, singeing here, forcing me back there, toying with me. When yet another route vanished beneath orange flames I looked up from my footing to see Furia even farther away than when I started. "No, Capsize!" I shouted before choking on a fresh billow of smoke.

The flames surrounded me now, and I could only watch as Furia floated into the air with Capsize in tow, her clothes and hair singed by contact with his skin. "Furia, please! Leave her alone! I'm the one you want! Take me instead!" I pleaded, not caring if I demeaned myself. I knew what Capsize would go through if he took her. I couldn't let that happen again. I couldn't...

Furia only cackled as the planks beneath my feet cracked and collapsed, sending me plunging into frigid water amidst burning debris. I panicked as I lost sight of the surface, fear of drowning now warring with fear of Capsize dying again. I'd seen her die once already. Wait, when was that? A large beam knocked the breath from my lungs and pinned my torso against the ocean floor. The panic and crushing weight only grew worse as I struggled in vain, heart racing. I thought I heard a muffled shout and saw a flash of purple light overhead before I sank into oblivion.

When my awareness returned, the first thing that registered were voices. They spoke softly, and I could only pick out pieces of what they said. My mind felt fuzzy, and I was too tired to try to figure out who they were.

"...deserves... ...dreams after that..."

"...exhausted; how long..."

"...much longer."

"Peace." I felt a gentle touch on my forehead, and the darkness returned.

---Time skip---

I bolted upright, gasping for air and coughing. My lungs burned and my mind spun as I blinked to make my eyes focus. Fire. Furia. Capsize!

"Easy there, Jardon. Ye took a solid hit to the skull." I felt a firm hand on my shoulder and recognized it and the voice as belonging to Capsize.

Capsize was safe. I relaxed, and the events of my nightmare faded. "Guess it's a good thing I have such a hard head, huh?" I asked as my coughing subsided. Ugh, did I swallow a whole ocean? What happened?

Capsize chuckled at my comment, shoving my shoulder lightly. I grinned and shifted so I was facing her, looking around as I did so. We were in a cave off a rocky beach. The waves outside were choppy, and rocks showed just beneath the surface. Rain pounded into the coast mercilessly, and thunder boomed in the distance. That made sense with how soaked Cap and I were.

My head hurt but not too badly; I'd apparently hit it on something? I couldn't remember. Hopefully it wasn't anything too embarrassing, I thought, remembering how I'd kinda died on our first date. Capsize must have dragged me here to get me out of the rain. Her hair hung in dripping waves down her back, just as untidy as the waves outside. I laughed a little at the comparison.

Capsize raised an eyebrow at me and asked, "What's so funny?"

I shook my head. "Nothing," I lied, still grinning.

Capsize smirked at me and countered, "Ye should be fixing yourself before laughing at me, matey. Ye look like something the trawl net dredged up."

I did look pretty rough. I even had seaweed wrapped around my ankle. Wait, was I in the water? "What happened, anyways?" I asked, letting Capsize have that point.

Capsize looked into my eyes for a moment, concerned. "Ye steered us onto the rocks 'an went overboard when we hit."

"Oh," was my only response to that. So I had almost swallowed an ocean. "Sorry I keep almost dying on our dates. It must get old saving me," I apologized while running my fingers through my wet hair.

She waved off my comment with a reassuring grin. "Nar. Anytime, Sparklez. This squall be a bad one; it not be entirely your fault this time."

"Are you implying that my getting poisoned by that witch was my fault?" I gasped, feigning dismay.

We bantered back and forth as we waited out the storm, getting a fire started when it got dark out. Eventually we switched from banter to swapping stories. I leaned back against the wall of the cave, and Capsize sat beside me, regaling me with a tale of her and Redbeard finding their first bit of treasure years ago—all because Redbeard misread a map. I laughed when she told how vehemently Redbeard still denied that error to this day. I wish this day would never end, I thought, looking outside to see the rain still pounding down. This fishing trip hadn't been our best idea ever, but it had sure been memorable. We'd been discussing a getaway for weeks, ever since we'd taken Ianite's heart to Ianarea. Capsize had promised to show me around some of her favorite islands.

I'd begun to think we'd never get around to taking this trip, what with Redbeard's weird premonitions of doom and Furia's rebellion. I frowned. Furia's rebellion... Memories of going to Dianite's temple and confronting Furia flashed across my mind. Furia took Capsize. I remembered that clear as day. This fishing trip never happened. I looked around, confused. Everything looked and felt so real. Am I dreaming, or did I hit my head harder than I thought?

"Jardon?"

I turned to look at Capsize. Her face held a seriousness and an urgency I'd rarely seen there. "Yes?"

"Can ye promise me something?"

"Of course."

"Don't be giving up. Remember those you have, 'an don't be trying to undo the past. That only leads ye to grief." She sighed and broke my gaze to look at the flames dancing in our small fire. "I know things don't look great right now, but they won't stay this way forever."

I nodded my agreement. Yep, this was definitely a dream. Capsize never got sappy like this unless she was drunk. Then again, I'd never been aware of a dream without waking up. "You're not Capsize, are you?" I asked, looking sideways at her.

"Capsize" gave me an amused grin before leaning over to gently kiss my forehead. "Goodbye, Jordan."

As she pulled away, the cave and stormy beach dissolved into muddied swirls of color and white noise. I closed my eyes for a moment, and it was gone, replaced by a quiet bedroom. The furnishings were of fine quality and were unmistakably chosen by an Ianitee. Soft shades of purple and violet predominated the small room's décor. I was lying down in an extremely comfortable bed and nearly let my eyes drift closed again before I forced myself to sit up.

I felt more rested than I had in weeks, though the headache from my dream had followed me in waking. I found a glass of water and my sunglasses on the nightstand and realized just how thirsty I was. Ironic given I was dreaming about drowning. After quenching my thirst, I fetched my shoes and blazer from where they had been laid. As I stepped into the hall, I realized I must be inside Ianite's temple. This place was too massive and grand to be any of the other structures I'd seen in Aethoria. As I moved around, my headache lessened, and my stomach started growling painfully. I'd expected to be hungover when I woke up, but not starving. I wondered where I might find something to eat as I reached the end of the hallway. It let out into Ianite's throne room.

I'd hardly gotten my bearings when I heard a high-pitched squeal. "Sperioles!" Then Ianita barreled into my legs, squeezing them in a tight hug. She nearly knocked me over in her enthusiasm.

"Ianita!" I laughed. I knelt when she let go of my legs, and she wrapped her arms around my neck instead. She'd been staying with Spark the last few days so she could see the festival. I must have missed her playing with the other children last night. "How are you doing, sweetie?" I asked, hugging her back, genuinely happy to see her.

"Good! I taught Uncle Red to make flower 'rowns," She said proudly. "You feeling better now, Sperioles?"

Better? What does she mean? "I'm fine sweetie. Why do you ask?"

"Ianite said you were sick and needed rest." I'd been nervous about Ianita meeting my Ianite—for more than one reason—but she'd quickly figured out that this wasn't her "Mam." There was still a distinct awkwardness anytime the two were together, but I was just happy Ianite didn't question our story about her being Helgrind's daughter.

I looked up now to see Ianite and Spark standing near one of the other hallways leading into the room. They were watching us. Why would Ianite tell her I was sick? I rose with Ianita on my hip and walked over to join them. "Good..." I realized I had no idea what time it was. "...morning?"

"Ianita, let's go for a walk before Aunt Martha comes to pick you up," Spark said to Ianita, all doting grandfather. His expression hardened when he looked to me. The thing that really gave away his dislike for me was the tightness around his eyes and his inability to look at me for more than a few seconds at a time. "Ianite wanted to talk to you," He said by way of explanation.

I nodded and gave Ianita a quick kiss on the cheek, making her giggle like mad. She gave me a quick peck on the nose before I set her down and handed her off to Spark. "Bye, Sperioles!" She waved before skipping toward the main doors with my alternate.

Spark said over his shoulder as they went, "You've been asleep for a day and a half, if you were wondering."

Wait, what?! I waited to verbalize my confusion until Ianite and I were alone. I turned to my goddess and asked, "My lady, what happened? Why did I sleep that long, and why did you tell Ianita that I was ill?" There was also that strange not-a-dream, but I'd get to that later.

Ianite's violet eyes locked on mine for a moment before she turned to walk down a passage. "Walk with me, Sparklez."

I obeyed, knowing there would be an explanation when she was ready. A short walk brought us to an exterior door opening on a small herb garden. At first I thought we were alone; then I noticed a familiar old lady kneeling between the rows, pulling weeds. "You! You spiked my drink!" I accused, recalling the odd taste of the mug she'd given me.

Lady Ianite didn't respond to my outburst, and the old lady only chuckled as she slowly straightened creaking joints to stand. She dusted her skirt off and introduced herself. "It is a pleasure to meet you too, young man. I am Witch Winstead."

That name sounded familiar. I tilted my head and thought for a minute before it clicked. "You helped Ianite when she was imprisoned!" That still didn't explain why she'd drugged me though.

Winstead nodded and brushed a stray lock of grey hair behind her ear. She moved to sit on a stone bench and gave me an appraising look. She glanced at Ianite as she spoke next. "What I gave you was a potion to allow me to access your mind while you slept—only to observe, and only at Ianite's request," She added when I would have interrupted. That stopped me cold. Ianite had asked Winstead to get inside my head? I looked at Ianite with mingled confusion and hurt.

"Noninterference is ever the safest policy in matters of the mind. We only stepped in when Ianite sensed another meddling with your dreams, and in quite a dangerous manner." Winstead seemed angry about whatever had happened. "Whoever set up that protection ward on your mind did a good job, but not a complete one. This...enemy was getting around it. How long have you been having nightmares?"

I froze. Oh cr*p; not this again. I was a terrible liar, and Ianite would surely be able to tell if I tried. "Ever since Capsize passed, but they got a lot worse after Ruxomar's Ianite discorporated. Being back home hasn't helped either."

This answer stunned Ianite and Winstead. Ianite's eyes betrayed her concern as she turned to look at me. Winstead appeared to shake off her surprise first. "Well, he shouldn't be able to get to you now, not while Ianite is alive and free. She reinforced your mental protection. Of course, you could still have nightmares on your own, but I can whip up some potions to keep you from dreaming at all if needed."

I was already getting a supply of those from Martha and Wag, but they didn't always work. Maybe that had been due to the attacks on my mind, but I couldn't be sure. If it meant no more nightmares, I'd give anything a try. "Thanks," I said with a grin. "Why would someone mess with my dreams, though?"

"They were trying to kill you," Ianite stated.

Oh.

"The strain of those nightmares was dangerous to your heart. Your body thought those dreams were real and reacted as if they were." Was that why I was so tired waking up? Lately I'd been waking with nerves shot and adrenalin high, but I'd thought that was normal after a nightmare.

"It's possible that alcohol or being in Aethoria made the reaction more acute too," Winstead chimed in. "If all your nightmares were as bad as the festival night one, I don't see how you'd still be alive." Winstead seemed to still be troubled by something and after a moment continued, "What worries me now is that this being may not have limited his attacks to your dreams. Have you been experiencing anything else out of the ordinary compared to the time before your nightmares?"

I thought back over my time in Ruxomar, trying to pick out anything that might not have been a normal reaction to losing someone I loved. Great, now I was thinking about Capsize again. I must have gotten lost in thought, because I felt a hand rest on my shoulder, drawing me back from my thoughts. I refocused on the present to find Ianite studying me again. Winstead was watching me too with something soft in her expression. "Let me ask you this, Jordan," She said as Ianite released my shoulder. "Have you been experiencing difficulty concentrating, lack of interest in things you used to enjoy, persistent guilt, restlessness, muted or sad emotions in general, and a lack of energy—even before the nightmares got bad?"

Pretty sure my face gave her all the answer she needed. She'd hit the nail on the head with most of those. "...how?"

Winstead gave me that soft look again, and I recognized it this time as pity and understanding. "Depression's not an uncommon problem among wizards and witches; we and mortals are not as different as most imagine. I doubt this is an attack, but that doesn't make it any less a problem."

Wait, depression? I was about to protest that I was way too cheerful to have depression, but then recalled that one time Sonja had dealt with a similar issue. She'd usually seemed fine unless you asked how she was doing or knew what to look for. I'd done a little research then, curious if there was anything I could do to help, and thinking back, all my symptoms were on the list I'd found. Oh Ianite, I have depression. I sank down onto a stone bench across from Winstead's. "So, um, how do I handle this exactly?" I asked, completely lost.

"Well, there is no one size fits all 'cure', but I can give you a few suggestions based on what helped one of my sons when he struggled with it," Winstead said with a grin. I tried to listen closely as she listed off some habits I could try cultivating to combat depression: reflecting on good things throughout the day—especially before bed, doing whatever my "thing" was to express myself (I tried not to laugh at that one), having an escape to lose myself in for bad times, looking at things as speed bumps rather than roadblocks, and feeding my curiosity by learning something new. (all the credit to Thomas Sanders' "Why am I so Happy" video for these ideas)

I got the feeling Ianite—who had remained silent through this exchange—was out of her depth here. Did gods ever deal with stuff like this? I thought back to when she was imprisoned and how hopeless and bitter she must have been  as her followers dwindled and failed to rescue her. Maybe gods did deal with this. Maybe she was taking notes too.

"And if you're still struggling, don't hesitate to ask for help. There are potions and medications that can help, though those may have side effects. Sometimes the thing that does the most good is confiding in a friend."

I nodded woodenly, mind swimming with uncertainty. This seemed so overwhelming. What if I don't get better? What if this only gets worse?

"I know things don't look great right now, but they won't stay this way forever."

Oh yeah. "Did one of you stick around in my dream after kicking Botan out of my mind?" No one had explicitly said it was him who'd attacked me, but it was easy to figure out. I mean, who else would want me dead so badly?

Winstead and Ianite looked thoroughly confused at my question. "You shouldn't have had any dreams. I used a spell that would have prevented them. May I?" Ianite asked, holding one delicate hand beside my head.

I nodded, and she lightly touched my left temple with her warm fingers. The dream—or maybe vision was a more appropriate term—replayed in my mind as Ianite watched. She broke contact as the memory finished with me waking up. She seemed engrossed in her thoughts afterward. After a few minutes she said quietly, "Keep your promise, Sparklez. I can assure you that being meant you no harm. I must go meditate on this." With that she turned and walked back into the temple, leaving Winstead and I alone in the garden.

"Um...Bye?" I said as the door swung closed behind her. What just happened?

"Well, young man, I suggest you stay here for a day or two, just so we can make sure that extra protection works as intended. If you think you'll die of boredom in the meantime, you can help me with the garden or Redbeard with his vineyard and sugar cane farm."

And so the next few days passed with daylight spent helping with various tasks around the temple and nights spent in fitful sleep. Knowing someone was watching me didn't really help. I did have one nightmare in that time, but it was of the normal sort involving nothing more evil than spiders and didn't pose any danger to my health. Ianite teleported me home the next morning.

Even more of my roof had collapsed in my absence, and I frustratedly decided to ignore it for now. There was something I wanted to do before anyone knew I was back. I trudged down to my vault and checked around just to make sure Tom or Sonja wasn't lurking somewhere. The coast was clear. I moved my nightstand and pried a brick about a foot above the floor loose. It was hollowed and held a small, black velvet box. I clutched the box in my hand and replaced the brick and nightstand. Next I slunk over to Jerry's tree and picked up the small chest of Capsize's things.

Hurrying down to the port while keeping out of sight, I rented a small sailboat for a few days. The wind was with me, and I made it to the rocky island from my vision by early afternoon the next day. The cave was right where I knew it would be, and I lit a torch, heading deeper with the chest over my shoulder. Reaching the back of the cave—well above any waterline—I found the reason Capsize had been so fond of this island. There was a pirate's treasure cache here. I laughed at how appropriate this was as I set Capsize's small chest among the others. I opened the chest and dug the velvet box out of my pocket. I set my torch in a wall sconce and opened the box, smiling sadly. There was the diamond I'd won off of Capsize from that fishing contest. I'd painstakingly carved it down into a perfect, multifaceted heart and set it in a band of silver. She would have loved it.

I closed the box and set it inside Cap's chest before sealing it too. Looking around the stash, I decided to only take one thing—a crate of rum—for the next time I visited Aethoria. Redbeard's reaction would be priceless. I carefully shouldered the crate and took my torch, looking back one last time. "Goodbye, Capsize," I whispered before walking out of the cave and sailing for home. She would always hold a place as the captain of my heart, but it was high time I stopped blaming myself and moved on. It was what Capsize would have wanted.