Ashar's POV

Sitting on the chair outside the emergency theater. It was almost an hour while staring at the picture of that infant. Hazel eyes, pink skin, chubby cheeks, pink lips. Just few hours old.

A know face came in-front my eyes but that was broken by a voice.

"Is there anyone with Shayan Hassan?"

"Yes.... I am his brother" I rushed and stood in front of the doctor.

" Can you come with me" he asked me.

Nodding I followed him putting the phone in my pocket

I was seating opposite to the doctor when he cleared his throat

"Do you know about his health, hmm about his state?" He said with hand on the desk with full on professional mode.

"What do you mean by that .....??" I questioned frowning. He was fine when he came to me and went for America.

"He has terminating liver cancer, do you know about that? ..... Mr Ashar" he said.

"He .. has what?" I was not a medical student but I knew what terminating means.

"I guess you are unaware of it, but as a doctor I need to tell you. I am sorry to say this but he has last stage cancer due to over usage of alcohol and many other product that we will come to know after the blood test report"

What he said after liver cancer didn't mattered. He was dying. Shayan was dying. He was not suppose to die now. He is so young.

Then I remembered death has no age.

Maryam died so young
Noorain didn't even get a chance to breathe.

Pushing my hair back. I leaned back on the chair.

"Can I .... I meet him?" I asked.

Nodding he walked out, leaving me to process what he said.

The anger was sub sided soon and was replaced but pain of loss.

____________________________________

Entering into the room. I glanced at him. Whose face was covered with a oxygen mask and many tubes attached to his arms.

Standing close to his bed I saw him blinking his eyes.
"Bhai ...."

"Don't say anything..." I stopped him from saying anything.

"She was born in Skardu .... Haniya sent me a photo ....." again he was stopped by his cough.

"She was adopted from there..... I went there" he was again interrupted by his cough.

"We will find her, rest now" I tried to stop him he was breathing hard but wanted to tell me everything.

"No ... she was adopted by a girl about 22 years old ..... We need to find that ...... girl" he choked on each word. With every word his breathing was ranging.

"Bhai ... find her for me ...." He held my hand.

"I will find her ...I will ... just get well we will find her together" I squeezed his hand lightly saying as convincing as I can sound.

He smiled on my words closing his eyes again for the darkness to consume it.

Slumping on the sofa by side I glanced back at the unrecognizable man.

Rubbing my forehead I glanced at the wall clock which showed 7 in the evening.

Leaving him there I went out to my car. Driving slowly I remembered that picture again.

Did Haniya's parent knew about all this. Who adopted her? Where she could be now?

If they knew they would have killed Shayan long time ago.

Stepping on the break I hitted the steering wheel and placed my head on it.

"Ya Allah please help me find her"

I pleaded to Allah.

Due to his mistake Haniya was no more and that little life was suffering and paying for it.

"What have you done Shayan!" I mumbled.

Allah, where that poor life will be.

Dead or alive. 

Pulling my hair I started driving back.

Entering the thick black gates. Throwing the cigarette away. Today even cigarette failed to calm my nerves.

I slumped on the sofa. Closing my eyes. I exhaled deeply in the silence of the house.

How will I tell Ammi about Shayan?

How will she react?

So many questions but no answers.

So many problems but no solutions.

Third POV

Seeing Ashar cars in the porch Mrs. Hassan came to the Hall to see Ashar rubbing his forehead.

"You came early today....?" Surprised she asked.

In last two years he was not home at this time at all. It was a rare event he even came before 8 but here he was back at 7.

A thought came in her mind. Was he coming early too other days for Haya? Is there something going on that she is not aware of.

Immediately she shrugged her thoughts. He was still not over Maryam otherwise he would have said yes to her, on how many times she insisted him to remarry.

Ashar glanced at his mother with weary eyes.

Nodding he moved towards his room passing by the guest that Haya used.

All the things were neatly arranged in the way they first were.

He went in, observing everything.

Then his eye caught a paper on the same side table he once placed the first-aid kit. Picking up the paper he unfolded it.

"Thank you for everything"

-Haya

He read the letter twice.

Then all the conservation he had in the morning came back with her teary face.

"What do you mean that IF I have done it ......."

"You believe what people say ...."

"Nothing will matter, what I say ......nothing ......"

"There is ..... no point of ..... .... my explanation"

"I told you everything but still what people are saying matters most. I thought you believe me .......... You never did na ....."

With that he remembered Noor's face leaning on her shoulder staring at him with her small eyes.

But suddenly another face come in his mind too.

Same eyes, same chubby cheeks, same hair.

"Is Noor ....?? ....Ya Allah ..." He mumbled out in disbelieve.

Taking out the phone from his pocket he tried to resemble the both faces.

And they did resembled.

Pushing his hair back he read the letter again.

"Thank you for everything"

-Haya

Then his mother's words came into his mind like a flood washing every doubt washed away from his mind.

"........... Even her own parents threw her out because they asked her to give the baby to a willing family but she refused. Tell me.... okay you tell me, who does that for someone's child. She was even gone somewhere to hide her child"

Ashar clutched his hair in his fists

Haya was the one who adopted her. That's why she came here.

How can I ask her go out

She was suffering because of Shayan and his mistake.

She is being accused because of him.

But where is she now.

He stood up and started looking in the room. Looking for her suitcase she had.

She was not there. Then he remembered.

"I will leave ....."

"Haya" he called that she might be in washroom.

Knocking on the door two to three times. He entered only to find it empty.

"Haya ....." He ran out of the room that she might be somewhere else in the house.

But she was already gone.

Mrs. Hassan was setting the dinner table when she saw Ashar moving towards the main door.

"Ashar .... !!" She called but he didn't glanced back.

He took long strides towards the out and sat into his car.

He needed to find her.

How did he never guessed about Haya. She was the most close whom Haniya could talk to.

He hopped into his black car that he owned to look for her. He didn't knew where she could be but one thing that he knew was that she could never back to her home.

She was disowned by her own parents.

Speeding out he started driving towards the possible place she could have gone to.

__________________________________

After that talk with Ashar and listening to Mrs. Hassan's views about her. Her self respect didn't let her stay in that house for a minutes.

Wiping her tears she glanced at Noor and then packed her things back in the suitcase.

She will go to Hamza Bhai place. At least she had a graduate degree. She will find a job and then see where life takes her.

She putted some warm clothes on Noor, who was looking at her like she always did - with pure innocence.

A feature that Haya loved in Noor, the way she looked at her.

Kissing her both chubby checks. She adored her with last piece of clothing.

After wearing her Abaya. She took her phone and made her way out of the house not knowing where she will end up.

After sitting on the bus stop. She opened her phone and make a call to Hamza Bhai only to realize that she was not having her new phone but the oldest phone she ever possessed. The phone before the phone, she lost on the beach after Shayan's rejection.

It only had 20 contact. All were school friends or family members which she had no contact with now.

And possibility of having Hamza Bhai's number was impossible and she didn't remember his number too.

Taking a seat on bus stop. She scrolled through all the data on her phone.

How can she forget this. Where is gonna go now.

No money
No number

She felt guilty  seeing a sleeping Noor in her lap. Not only she got in trouble but also dragged Noor in it.

Now where will she go at least she should have stayed there and called from there. Why did she come to bus station and then tried to make a call.

Swallowing the lump in her throat. She clicked on landline number at home.

With the hope that Sarah might pick up.

But to her hopes it was always opposite and so was this time.

On the other side the Phone was picked up by Mr. Khan. Who was reading newspaper while sitting in hall close to the landline phone.

Hesitatingly Haya called.

"Hello" She said as soon as the phone picked up. Another mistake that she did, to speak first.

"Why have you called now " Haya shivered as loud voice of Mr. Khan reached her ears. "Did he threw you out too" he scoffed "Well you deserved it"

Haya closed her eyes on the insulting words her father used.

"Baba .... Please...." She pleaded.

But she only heard beep beep on the other side.

As soon as Mr. Khan put the receiver down. He unplugged the phone so she cannot call back again.

He did wanted to listen to the daughter, due to which he was not able to show his face to anyone.

Haya kept on trying and trying but every time answer was same.

Helplessly a tear feel from her eyes onto Noor's cheek.

What have she done. How can she be so stupid.

It was getting late and with every passing hour her pain was increasing along with the guilt that Noor was suffering too.

The eyes of passing-by people were becoming suspicious.

And bus stops are not a safe place and moreover by this time she also needed a place to break down.

It was getting dark. Moving to the near by park she moved to bench behind the a bush so that she is not seen by any passer.

She didn't wanted anyone to see her. She wanted to cry.

The only thing that she was able praise herself was a bottle of prepared milk. She putted in her bag before she left.

After slumping down on the bench. She knew this was wear she is gonna be staying the night.

Thinking that also brought tears into her eyes. She was born in a rich family but she was on roads like beggars. Today ever penny seems precious to her that she wasted on shopping on international brands. All the things she took for-granted. Her education, her money, food every single thing, now she lacked all. 

And seeing Noor in her lap her guilt intensified. She was not capable to have a such a precious soul. She was not even able to feed her food. Why she adopted her? she could have given her to a another family that could loved her and keep her safe. with all these thought she made a decision to give her away.

Clutching her to her chest she cried waiting for the tears to stop but today they seem to never stop. 

Consoling herself she mumbled " I will take you back after I finish my education. I will take you back and then we will go far away." A new thing she started doing, consoling her own-self.

Listening to this Noor also started crying like somehow she came to know what is going to happen next.

"I am ... so .. so .... sorry .... Noor ..." Haya said through a sobbed and made a decision that will break her more that she could ever imagine.

__________________________________  

After rooming all city he was sitting in the car, parked across the same bus stop. 

Where could she go? her home was not a option. Perhaps friends. Sitting here he dialed all the numbers to Shayan friends of course they were same as hers. But after all the call the answer was "Haya we haven't seen her since a years or so ...." 

Pulling his hair back. He cursed her. He could have said her t leave after sometime.

where could she have been gone. One part of his brain said that she might have gone to some friend.

But the other part said the if she didn't find any place. She might be in some danger the accusations were not a small thing. She might be still on road somewhere. 

So he asked for all the women hostel only to come back without any clue at the same place.

He was too tired to drive but with every stroke of dark that covered the sky, his guilt intensified. Because of Shayan two lives were struggling on the other hand he himself was dying. 

Now by the this time he he had search the whole city two times and stopped across the same bus stop.

His eyes were tired but the thought that she might be out there somewhere in trouble didn't let him go home.

Where could she be?

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