Haya's POV

It has been 3 months since she died. That day is still on my mind. How I saw the world getting blur in front of my eyes. How I felt my throat clogged. How much I prayed all that to be a dream but it was a harsh reality that was here and we have to face it.

Last day I was with her but I never imagined that would be last soup I would be making for her. It would be the last time I would feed her with my hand.

But look at this damn life it still carries on even though the most precious thing is not with you anymore. And nothing is there that you can do change it.

I am happy Noor is here for me. Even though she is very little but she still gets disturbed seeing my tears. I am so happy I didn't give up on her. Even though Hamza Bhai tried that I give up her for adoption to an infertile couple. I am glad that I never did.

I went to Bhai's room.

"Bhabhi can you go to market with me tomorrow." she smiled and agreed.

"Thank you" I hugged her and moved back to my room.

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We were both in market along with Noor. I had to buy few things for Noor and myself. Thank god I still have my card with me.

After shopping I went to pay while Ayza Bhabhi was still shopping.

I gave my card to the shopkeeper.

"Ma'am your card is expired"

"What!!!! ...." I said shockingly and started examining my card and it was really expired a month ago.

"Uff what I am gonna do now" I debated internally.

"What happened Haya?" Ayza Bhabhi said who was standing by my side now.

"Hmmm ...... my card ... expired" I said embarrassingly.

"It's okay I can pay for you." she said politely and gave her card to the shopkeeper.

"Thank you" I said with a smile.

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I lay down on my bed with many thoughts running in my mind.

"How I am gonna manage without my card. I still need so many things for Noor........ I cannot ask for money too ..... I cannot be dependent on them ....... It's not about one month's or two ...... I think I need to go home but ...... Noor" I glanced at her who was sleeping peacefully.

Today or some other day or after some more years they are gonna know about her no matter how hard I try to hide her.

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Next day I prayed my Isha prayer (late night prayer). I was about to sleep when I saw the water jug empty. I went towards the kitchen to fill my water jug, when I heard .....

"Ayza we cannot leave her alone" Hamza Bhai said

"But it is also important for us. We still have five days to prepare for it." Ayza Bhabhi said.

"If I ask her to leave for home she will think I am doing this because of Noor. Yes, I don't like her idea of her adoption but I never disliked Noor"

"I will stay with her you can go"

"No I cannot go without you. We will together or we will stay here together with her"

"Hamza you go I will stay with her"

"You can also go Ayza and I can say here....... It's better that we both stay here. She still in a shock due to Amma's death"

"Hamza its okay you go. I will take care of her. I can get another opportunity like that but you cannot get this conference again"

"No ... we will stay and that's final"

After that I went to my room quietly. Now I really need to think about this problem. How many more days I am gonna stay here and affect their lives too.

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After yesterday night I decided to face my family. One day I have to do that no matter what. One big reason was that my credit card also expired a month ago and I don't want to be dependent on Bhai. He has already done enough for me.

Taking out my phone I called Sarah but she didn't answer. Its okay I will surprise her after I go back. I decided to break the news of me going back on the dinner table. After three days since I heard them.

"Bhai ....... I want to go home" I said while eating on the dinner table.

"Why do you want to do home?" he asked curiously.

"How long I am gonna stay here with you .... I have to go back no matter what ..... It's already been almost one and half year since I am here ......." I said eating my content on my plate.

"Haya ..... Don't think that I hate Noor ..... I am not against Noor .... It's just that you are too young to adopt her you yourself are only 23 ...... and how are you ever gonna get married ......." He tried to clear his point but I stopped him

"Bhai ..... No one knows about future ..... So why should I care for what I don't even know and leave her because she can cause some problems in my life........ How can you guarantee that without her my life will be perfect and I will be happy.......... I decided to adopt her with all my heart and I will not leave her like her mother did. If I will do the same then there will be no different in me and her mother. We will be SAME" I tried to make him understand me.

"Don't take your decision emotionally you are too young. Just think wisely then do whatever you want to considering all the consequences too ...... than I will drop you at your home" he said.

Nodding my head. I finished my dinner and continued my remaining packing because I already decided to go home. Whether today or tomorrow I need to go home. There is no point of escaping from it. I have to be there, no matter what.

I decided to go home tomorrow. Tomorrow I will go back to home. I am scared a little to know how they will react.

It feels like I don't know them and I am going there for the first time.

I don't know how I will react if I see Haniya Aapi and Shayan together but I have to do it now or years later. Sighing I looked back at Noor who was sleeping peacefully on her place. I smiled seeing her cute pout.

I kissed her head. Haniya Aapi will be very happy to see her. Sarah will be again advising me like an elder person. I laugh rolling my eyes imagining her.

I hope next day brings a good day for me. I quietly laid beside Noor to catch some sleep.

Third POV

Mrs. Khan thought Shayan would return after two to three weeks but weeks turned into months and these months were now turning into a year with no sign of him.

She asked Mrs. Hassan (Shayan's mother) many times but she made excuse that he very busy with his studies.

While Shayan was not even receiving call form his own family he was not in contact with anyone and his family was not new to it, very trip he used to do this. On Mrs. Khan's inquires Mrs. Hassan did called Shayan which he rejected with a text message saying

"I'm busy"

"I'll call you later"

"I am in university"

"I am out now. Call me later"

"Wait I'll call you back in a bit"

But he never called except once in a month to say hello.

He was busy but not with universities. He was busy parting. Like always he went to random clubs flirted, got drunk but with time there was something that was changing him. All these girl with whom he used to flirt with, suddenly became cringest ones. Whenever he tried to get close to any women Haniya's face used come before his eyes. How she use to maintain a distance. Whenever he sees a woman wearing a scarf he remembered how many times he pulled her dupatta off her.

Everything started coming before her eyes. He thought it will go away and he was way too wrong about it with every passing day it was increasing. Now he was seeing Haniya in every girl. Her crying face was coming infront of his eyes again and again. He started drinking more than he can handle. He thought alcohol could remove her face form his mind and he was wrong again. After drinking alcohol his condition was even worse but he didn't remembered anything about it next morning. People would come and tell him about the disaster he did at random clubs. How many girls he pushed away calling Haniya.

After that he stopped going to club and started staying at his flat drowning himself in alcohol. He was in an unknown pain and he was using alcohol to get rid of that pain. He was drinking day and night. At night he would be under the influence of alcohol and in day time he was having hangovers. He was not using painkiller for the hangovers he was using sleeping pills. He wanted to escape from the pain and pain can only be ended by facing it.

All day he was having hangovers but at nights he was again drinking nonstop. It was like he wanted to remove something form his mind which was paining him and he was doing it with alcohol forgetting that only remembrance of Allah can give him peace.

Shaitan (Satan) wants only to excite enmity and hatred between you with intoxicants (alcoholic drinks) and gambling, and hinder you from remembrance of Allah and As-Salat (the prayer) so , will you not then abstain? [Quran 5:91]

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"Sarah, where is Haniya?" Mrs. Khan inquired while sipping her tea in the garden.

"Madam.... she is sleeping" Sarah said who was going back to her servant quarter.

"Why this girl is sleeping all day. It has been months since she came back from the farm house" she said and decided to go to her room.

Haniya was sleeping on her bed. She was weaker than before which was noticed by Mrs. Khan. Helplessly she brushed her hair and sat on her bed for some time.

Now she was worried about Haniya. She tried to call Shayan but there was no response. Now it was a time to discuss this matter with Mr. Khan.

In the evening she again asked about Haniya and she was again sleeping. Mrs. Khan was worried with how much she was sleeping.

After the dinner Mrs. Khan and Mr. Khan were in their room on their bed about to sleep.

"Salman .... I think we should end this engagement. Haniya is not happy with it and Shayan is not taking any interest in this engagement" Mrs. Khan voiced her argument.

"What are you saying Seema? You know Safia Bhabhi will not allow it and moreover everyone knows about it and no one will ask for her hand ..... It's been a year since the engagement now people are expecting their wedding."

"You right Salman ..... But Haniya ........... She is not okay..... They are not married and Haniya is like this how it will all work after marriage" Mrs. Khan told him what she was feeling form past few weeks.

"We will talk about it late Seema ........ for now sleep, I need to wake up early for a meeting" saying this Mr. Khan switched off the lamp on his side and went to sleep.

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