"WE need to move... now." Mariing wika sa'kin ni Maria. "I didn't expect that they will be here. Hindi dapat tayo makita rito. Let's go!"

Nagpatangay ako sa hila ni Maria habang nakatulala hindi lang ang aking mata maging ang aking isipan. I just don't know what to do when Yvette confirmed that the woman who has Gabgab was none other than my older sister— Helena. A sister that I didn't even know exists.

Ni hindi ko pa nga hundred percent na-d-digest sa utak ko na may nakakatanda akong kapatid ay saka naman sinundan ang pagkakita ko sa kanya? Questions were pouring me and I don't know what's the first question to ask.

All along I thought kami lang ni Travis ang Fontanilla sa pamilya namin. Does this mean that Dad and Mom hid this information on purpose? Alam ba 'to ng kapatid ko? Paanong buhay siya kung sa mga binomba nilang rebelasyon sa'kin ay lumalabas na patay na ito pero heto at nakita ko pa talaga na buhay na buhay. At ano? Ibig sabihin... totoong may namagitan talaga sa kanila ni Troy noon? Is it possible that Gabgab is their...?

"H-Hey, Serena. Calm down, okay? Breathe, girl. You need to breathe." Rinig kong wika ni Maria sa tabi ko, we are now back in our car and I didn't notice that I'm struggling to get some air.

"Is she okay, Maria? Tell me what's happening to her?!" rinig kong tanong naman ni Yvette sa kabilang linya.

"Her anxiety is attacking her," she replied then tried to get a small fan. She opened the car window beside so the air will get in.

"Just come back here at once, we'll figure this all out. We have something to discuss with the kid's kidnappers too."

"B-But... w-what about Gabgab?" nag-aalala kong tanong.

"Leave it to your brother and that good for nothing arsehole. They won't leave there without the kid for sure."

Tumango tango na lamang ako at nagawi ang tingin sa bintana. Maria's driving speed is normal. I breathed deeply and washed away the tears that keep on falling. 'Di ko inaakala na ganito pala kasakit. The pain from the bombs they exploded at me has this domino effect. Napakaswerte ko naman 'ata. Eat that sarcasm!

I couldn't believe that liking Troy deeply would give me these emotional stains that will last for quite a while. I thought I've had enough with my pain before. Hindi pa pala tapos 'yon. Parang binigyan na naman ako tadhana ng poproblemahin. Isang bagay na magmamarka na sa puso ko habangbuhay.

Bakit ba gano'n ano? Why is it easy to like a person but expecting that it would be reciprocated should experience this kind of roller coaster ride? Normal na ba 'to na mararanasan ko everytime that I will like a person? Bakit parang ang bigat naman yata at mas masakit? Bakit mas masakit pa siya sa mga nauna ko nang pinagdaanan?

They say that once you experienced the worst, having it again won't be too hard to deal with. That when you experience the worst pain you could ever feel, yung mga susunod mamaniin mo nalang. Bakit parang 'di naman 'ata umubra sa'kin? At bakit 'di siya naubra? It's unfair, really really unfair!

I did my best to be in the position where I am right now. Iginapang ko ang success ko na 'to. Pero yung mga problema ko at pinagdadaanan ay akala mo pinaparamdam sa'yo ulit na first time mo 'tong maramdaman, dealing the pain... again.

Bakit hindi nalang sinabi sa'kin ni Troy ang totoo? Or at least nabigyan naman sana niya ako ng hint na ang ginagawa niyang ito ay para pala sa isang babaeng... hindi ako. That his hunt to know the truth behind the death of my so-called sister should be done at hindi ako sapat na rason para hindi na niya iyon ungkatin pa uli.

Tangina, sino nga naman ba ako 'di ba? I was used by him, from the beginning. From the night she saw me in that bar in the US. Kasangkapan lang naman ako para malaman niya ang totoo. Although he's getting there, the moment that he exposed his plan means that I'm no longer needed because I've already served my purpose.

Gano'n nalang ba ang worth ko ngayon sa isang tao? At least bilang Serena? Am I that too easy to be played with?

"I hope you are not overthinking too much, girl," Maria said in her soft tone. Bakas ang pag-aalala sa'kin.

I gave her a faint smile, "I'll be okay. I should be, right?" anas ko habang hindi napigilan ang pagpiyok dahil sa nagbadyang mga luhang tumulo. I put my palm on my face and I only felt Maria's hug after she stopped the car on the side of the road.

"We are here, you know that." Bulong pa nito sa'kin. "Marami ka pang etits na pwedeng makuha d'yan."

"Maria!" I scandalously reacted while I retained my face behind my palms. Natawa rin kalaunan.

Maria laughed, "At least it distracted you for a bit."

We both laughed before I fixed myself. Pulang pula ang mata ko sa pag-iyak, one last deep breath before I told Maria that we should be heading where Yvette is.

"Are you sure? How about the kid?" Maria asked.

I shrugged my shoulders while I put a foundation on my face. To at least hide what needs to be hidden.

"I guess... Troy will be able to get him." I concluded.

Pagod na akong mag-isip. Nakakapagod isipin ang iba kaysa isipin ko ang nangyayari sa'kin ngayon emotionally. They are destroying me, bits by bits. And I don't like that. Hindi ako ganito. Hindi dapat ako nagkakaganito. I used to be in control of myself. Yeah, I should be, like I always do.

"What's happening, Yvette? Sino 'yang si Helena Gabrielle Fontanilla?" tanong ko sa kanya habang nakatingin ito ng mariin sa'min.

Kakarating lang namin ni Maria sa temporary base namin dito sa gitna ng Makati Business Center. We are all looking at the glass wall kung sa'n kitang kita ang kalakhang Makati.

"Handa ka ba sa mga maririnig mo, Serena?" it was my first time hearing Yvette be so concern about me. I mean, she may be cold and very straightforward with her words, pero sobrang dalang lang nito magsalita gamit ang ganitong tono.

"My family must be so fucked up," I uttered under my breath. And it's true, I'm the living proof of my father's sin. Anak sa buho. Anak sa labas.

"Katulad ng mga sinabi ni Rolando sa lunch meeting niyo kanina, totoong may kapatid ka. A hidden princess to be exact."

Napakuyom ako ng kamao sa paunahang pahayag ni Yvette.

"She's the firstborn child of your father and step-mother. However, she was not born healthy. Pinanganak siyang mababa ang immune system and madalas na palabas masok ng ospital noon. With this condition of their first daughter, your parents decided to cage her. From the fairytale's perspective, she was caged in their castle. No one knew about her, they erased her information in all databases so no one would try to harm her. Iyon kasi ang mga panahon na malaki ang krisis na kinaharap ng Daddy mo. Their company was on the brink of destruction and the only one who helped them was the Monteverde's."

Napaupo ako sa kalapit na sofa habang nakikinig. "Walang hindi nakakaalam na malapit ang pamilya mo sa pamilyang Monteverde. Your father and Troy's father were like best of friends in their era. Fontanilla are grateful because, despite their differences, your company managed to survive whilst struggling to keep your sister safe."

Naramdaman ko ang paglapit ng kamay ni Maria sa aking likod. She's trying to calm me while I could feel that my emotions are getting hay-wired again.

"In the records that I was able to pull up, I've seen this." May pinakita si Yvette na picture sa'kin. A picture of two girls at their kid's age habang nasa gitna ang isang lalaki na mas may edad ng ilang taon sa kanila. "That's your sister."

Tinuro ni Yvette ang babaeng may naka-pink blouse, ang kutis ay kasing gatas katulad ng akin and her hair is on a natural black. Her deep-auburn eyes that reflect the same with my stepmother made me teary up a bit. She's... beautiful and adorable. Pero katulad ng sabi ni Yvette, the younger Helena really looked weak.

"It seems like they are BFFs," Maria commented.

"Indeed, only them and the young Troy knew about the existence of your sister," Yvette confirmed.

"And that young man resembles Rolando. Where he came from...?" Maria asked.

"He's a son of one of your maids in the House of Fontanilla." Napatingin ako kay Yvette nang marinig ang kanyang sagot. He's what...?

"Rags to riches thing, huh," Maria commented on the side.

"Anak siya ng isa sa katiwala namin kaya kilala niya ang kapatid ko kahit na tinago siya nina Mom and Dad." Wika ko.

"Exactly," Yvette confirmed, then she slid her tablet to make me see what's the next item she would discuss. "And these...?"

I gasped a bit upon reading the head title of a document Yvette showed us.

"A marriage certificate?" Maria asked.

Yvette nodded at us and said, "On her 18th birthday, Rolando and your sister got married when Rolando's biological father acknowledged him as his illegitimate heir of Casa Martinez in Spain."

"Ang cliche ng buhay niya in fairness." Maria commented on the side. Napatingin kami sa kanya ni Yvette as if she's forgetting something who has a similar story like him?

Maria's face turned sour as soon as she realized what she said and made a peace sign at me. "Sorry, oo nga pala same kayo ng nangyari halos."

Napailing iling nalang ako at biglang naisip si Rolando. We have the same set-up of life as how we achieved our successes. I didn't mean us being son and daughter of a wealthy businessman. Parehas kami sa aspeto na pinagdaanan muna namin parehas ang matinding hamon ng buhay na salat ka sa pera. Na tumitingala ka pa sa mas may kapangyarihan sa'yo.

"What's the reason for him marrying my sister then?" I asked Yvette.

Yvette sighed. "Well, I can't really say that she's lucky but she damn was. Rolando's in love with her. Base sa nakalap ko, he did that arrangement because he's desperate to save her. You see, your sister's condition was a no joke. Considering na hindi pa ganoong kataas ang kalidad ng medisina ng mga panahon nila, oras ang kalaban ni Helena. Martinez's clan in Spain owns Pharmaceutical companies and subsidiaries, he's clever enough to accept his father's condition of him being the sole heir and used that opportunity."

"Does my sister... loved him too?" isang tanong na 'di dapat lumabas sa bibig ko dahil alam kong sakit sa damdamin ang maaari kong matamo.

Natigilan si Yvette at napatitig sa'kin. Her eyes are like daggers as if I'm being serious asking that.

"I'm going to be fine, Vette. Please, don't treat me as if moving on is next to impossible." Inis kong wika sa kanya.

"That... we are not sure," anas ni Maria sa tabi ko when she got her lemonade juice and sat on the couch.

Tinaasan ko siya ng kilay and her eyebrows and eyes did the same. "What? I am just stating that we haven't seen you being head over heels to a man before and all these dramas you are showing are still new to us, you know. Puro landi lang ako, I haven't felt that too yet."

"Parehas lang kayong sinungaling," Yvette rolled her eyes and took a sip of her wine.

"Nakakahiya naman sa'yo, Attorney. Concern na concern ang kapatid ko sa'yo ah!" I rebutted so that the spotlight will be on her.

"That's not the topic we are at now. Do you still want me to answer your question, Serena?" Masungit na wika at tanong ni Yvette sa'kin.

I sighed, "I said, I'm okay kung ano man 'yang sagot sa tanong ko."

"Then the answer is... yes. Dahil hindi magtatangkang patayin ng kapatid mo ang sarili niya nang malaman niyang inaahas ni Adrianna si Rolando."

Parehas kaming napasinghap ni Maria sa siniwalat ni Yvette. Nagkatinginan kaming dalawa ni Maria at sabay na napatingin pabalik sa larawang binigay ni Yvette. So, that means, the other girl in the picture was no other than Adrianna.

Something clicked on my memory. If my memory serves me right, Adrianna did all those money launderings from her own family business just to get the shares of Joaquin instead of proposing a partnership through a product project. That's why gano'n na lang ang naging tono ng usapan nina Troy, Adrianna, and Rolando after that meeting.

Yvette slid her finger on the iPad that I'm holding and it shows a medical certificate of Helena. Medication on her slit wrist and psychological referral because of what she had done. Napahawak ako sa aking bibig, alam kong ngayon ko palang nakikilala ang kapatid ko pero ang maranasan niya ang ganito ay hindi ko mapigilan ang hindi manibugho.

She probably did that because of her health status. Being caged for all her life kung saan ang tanging kaibigan at karamay niya lang na sina Rolando at Adrianna, this must be painful being cheated on. Her most trusted people aside from our parents did something behind her back. That must have been too hard for her and that's why she resorted to giving up on her life.

"And that's what ended the report." Napatingin ako kay Yvette sa sinabi niya. Sandali ba't parang may kulang? Where's the report kung saan involved si Troy?

"W-Wait—" Yvette interrupted me.

"I know what's bugging you, bitch. Troy was not on the report that much so don't ask me anything related to him."

"P-Pero—"

"I think that is his story to tell," Yvette said when she put down her glass and sat beside me. She held my hands and continued what she wanted to say, "There are really gaps in the report but that's the summary that I think can help you to reach him out about it. I know you are hurt by what he did, but knowing these things, it's better if the story should come from his mouth. He will fill the gap, Serena. That might also answer your question."

"Q-Question?"

Dinuro niya ang dibdib ko. "Tanong niyan, of course. Ano pa ba? You are hurting because of what Rolando had fed you. But we didn't really know what happened after your sister's suicidal incident. Like papaanong buhay siya, there might be a version where they made look like her suicide ended her life kaya ganoon nalang ang reaksyon kanina ni Troy pagkakita sa kanya. And again, those are just the possible side of the story."

"True," napalingon naman ako kay Maria na humilig sa balikat ko to give me comfort. "Learn from me, I know na chikadora ako at halos lahat ng chismis alam ko. Pero kahit magkagano'n man, I know how to distinguish facts and lies. I know it's easy to say, right? But for you to know if that's true, one way should start from you."

"It should start from me?" I asked.

Tumango si Maria. "Yeah, learn to ask."

I snorted, "As if it's easy to ask that after what he made me feel."

"Hindi ko naman sinabing gawin mo agad. Magtanong ka at your own pace. Ask whenever you are ready."

Natahimik ako sa gusto nilang ipunto na dalawa. Natawa ako ng palihim dahil iyong advises nila, it's not about me should compromise with Troy or even telling me to move on right away.

Nakalimutan kong they also matured. Well, we should, right? Working in our respective fields taught us how to adapt to this stages of life where we need to make money to survive and be rational at all times.

I sighed, both of them have a point. I should ask, pero gaya ng sinabi ni Maria, at my own pace. Sa ngayon, 'di ko pa talaga kaya. Kasi sigurado akong 'di ko lang paniniwalaan ang mga sasabihin ni Troy lalo pa't galit ako sa kanya at pinagmukha niya akong tanga mula simula. Na ginamit niya ako sa pansarili niyang interes.

Don't get me wrong, what I did to him was also not right. Fooling him by pretending to be someone else has never been right since the start. Kahit pa sabihin nating pakana rin 'yon ni Troy, if given the circumstance that he did not plan this, for sure his rage will welcome me with open arms.

"Now, let's talk about Gabriel's kidnappers..." Yvette said.

I SIGHED as soon as I closed the door of my condo. The place was still dark, which means Travis was not here yet. I only texted him to inform me what happened to Gabriel and reasoned out that Maria and I had to go due to some emergency. He didn't reply so I guess, either he's still with Troy while he and my long-lost sister are catching up.

Naupo ako sa couch at napasandal. I am too exhausted both physically and emotionally. This day was really a long one.

My phone rang after a couple of minutes. It was my father who's calling. He's been calling me non-stop since I left Yvette and Maria. He even texted— which is very rare I must say, telling me that I should go home to our family house to talk about what happened. I tried blocking my father's number but knowing him if I'll do that? For sure, his guards will be here any moment now to fetch me.

I deeply sighed one more time and answered the call.

"Serena, where are you—"

"Dad, please not today okay?"

"But y-your Mom is worried—"

"Which apparently not my biological mother, remember?" 'di ko napigilan sumagot ng pabalang.

"Serena! Don't use that tone on me!"

I sighed again and apologized, "I'm sorry." Wika ko na labas sa ilong.

I also heard him sigh. For sure he's on their lanai, smoking or drinking his whiskey probably. "It's our fault, Princess. We are very sorry for not telling you about her—"

"Dad, please don't call me Princess anymore." I requested because that title was not really meant for me. It was meant for my sister anyway. She's their first Princess, not me. I know I sounded so bitter but the hell I am!

"Serena, anak. Please don't be like this." Dad slightly begged to see their reasons. "You know that we love you, that I love you."

"I know but I just can't help it Dad. I was born not knowing that I have a sister. I was not informed that you had her before me but... do you know what's more painful, Dad?" hindi ko napigilan ang pumiyok. My tears are starting to swell in my eyes again and the pain started to linger in my chest. "That for not telling me about her sounded like I do not belong. That I am not really part of the family."

"N-No, no, Princess. Please d-don't ever think that. You are, okay? You are part of this family as to how you have my blood in you. Don't think that way, please?"

I sniffed because I can no longer hold my tears. "I don't know anymore, Dad. I was transparent before to you that moving in on your household will forever be like that. That I would always try to fit in because I am a product of sin of that night."

"Serena, you are not a product of my sin. Okay? It's my sin alone and I will forever atone that until I lose my breath. Hindi mo kasalanan ang mabuhay, nakalimutan mo ba na 'yan ang una kong paalala sa'yo?"

"Pero bakit kailangan niyo sa'kin itago ang tungkol kay Helena? Bakit sa'kin na kadugo niyo naman gaya ng sabi mo?"

Hindi ito kaagad nakasagot, marahil ay napagtantong nakakuha na ako ng impormasyon patungkol sa kapatid ko.

"Tell me, alam ba 'to ni Travis? Kilala niya rin ba ang kapatid niyang buo?"

Dad's silence is more painful than answering my question truthfully. Damn! Travis knows it too and he didn't even try to tell me?!

"Clearly, all of you don't trust me that's why."

"Anak, please—" I ended the call and threw my phone on the wall. I burst into tears and my cries enshrouded the whole room.

Bakit mas masakit sa pakiramdam na ang sarili mong pamilya ay walang tiwala sa'yo kesa sa sakit na binigay ni Troy?

My family really fucked up, huh? Or maybe I am the one who's fucked up?