Chapter Thirty-Two

"Niki so happy master back and safe, well, 'sept for being sick. That not good."

I had no idea how much I honestly missed hearing that obnoxious broken English from the fae/imp, until I actually heard it in my ear as Niki prepared a healthy soup for me as I laid in bed, sick with Recharge. He'd finally come to my room, eager to serve me as usual. Unfortunately, he'd dragged Dorean along with him while Xenon was out on the job. Dorean just stood nearby, arms folded over his chest, wearing a white glittery tank top and matching shorts with flip-flops that were definitely girl's, but I said nothing because according to Xenon, Dorean didn't like to be corrected about his fashion choices.

"I'll be better," I told Niki dryly as I sat up slowly so I could take the soup off the tray, blowing on it to cool it down, "What've you been doing?" I wasn't sure if I cared or not. I just hated this awkward silence and Dorean's intense stare with those bright silver eyes. Niki looked thrilled as he hopped on the bed, careful not to spill the soup as he touched his fingertips together thoughtfully.

"Well, after we's left the Gehenna place, we come here and I got nice room next to Dorean's. It so big! Niki never had no big room like that before. Oh, Dorean took Niki lots of shopping and gots new clothes, but no worry, master, promise not to wear on the job." He reminded. I frowned, averting my eyes as I took a sip of soup, trying not to cringe at that horrid flavor of it. I forgot how rank this shit was.

"It doesn't matter," I told him, making him look at me in confusion, "You can wear what you wish." Niki brightened.

"Oh, thank you so much, master! So happy to wear nice clothes now!" He exclaimed excitedly. Dorean cocked his head at Niki, who looked at him excitedly. Dorean just shrugged.

"You free to do as you please, Niki. You don't need my permission to be happy." He told him. If Niki could look any brighter, he'd be the sun right now. He looked positively thrilled. And I almost smiled until I saw him kicking his legs on the edge of the bed and I caught a glimpse of the slave mark branded beneath his foot. I frowned further, looking away at Dorean, who was laughing at something Niki was saying about french fries. I took another sip of soup, trying not to openly spew it everywhere and make Niki cry. The slave was bound to feel guilty for making something awful. Not that he could help it. The soup was naturally awful. Nothing anyone could do could make it taste any better. The horrid mixture of nectar with blood and whatever else was in it made it the worst tasting thing in history.

Niki and Dorean stuck around for a while longer, until I felt like I couldn't stand them anymore. All they did was talk about shopping and buying new things, not that Niki had any money. He was a slave. Slaves weren't paid. Dorean had used his own money to help Niki buy his new things, and I knew it bothered Dorean. Not the fact that he was buying things for Niki with his own money, but the fact that Niki didn't have his own money to buy his own things. It was making me rethink this whole slave thing, and I wasn't sure if that was good or bad.

Slavery had existed since the beginning of time. It was like switching from candles to lightbulbs. It was going to be a difficult process, but I suppose it wouldn't really hurt anyone... except the slave industry and probably the bounty hunter corporation. They obviously thrived on the business and would be furious to find out I had a change of heart. Even I was furious at myself for giving a shit about a mere slave, a half-imp, half-fae slave no less.

But it wasn't the only thing that was changing my mind about slavery.

Atros had also changed me. I had gotten into the head of a slave, a prostitute no less. He would go on for hours about how he was barely given enough money to live on. His pay for being a prostitute was equivalent to maybe two hundred American dollars a month. The only reason he was paid at all was because his owner believed keeping her whores happy. Not that that little of money could keep them happy. She didn't want to, as she put it, spoil them. It opened my eyes to way he was treated like an animal, and he wasn't an animal.

Despite Atros's suicide being a slap across the face, it didn't make Atros a horrible person. He was a broken man who'd slept with the monster who led to his wife's death. Granted, he didn't sleep with Julius, but he slept with the next worse person-- me. His suicide wasn't rooted in just the fact that his wife and son were dead, or his life was a shithole of slavery. It was that the love he thought was real turned out to be a let down. And I shared that sentiment.

And I hated both of us for it.

Maybe slavery wasn't such a good thing after all.

Convenient, because it required less use of magic, but for the other person?

The rest of my slaves were murdered and slaughtered by the Titans. They weren't allowed to use their magic to defend themselves, because I hadn't been there to give them permission. Because of that, they were dead, or being tortured. The fact that Niki made it out alive was a miracle that I honestly was grateful for.

Yeah, slavery sucked.

Dorean and Niki eventually left my room to go meet up with Xenon for dinner later that day. Thank goodness too, because while they were polite and friendly, they were far too talkative and I was accustomed to brooding silences. I needed a break from indepth conversations about silk material and the English language that Dorean was trying to teach Niki. I bade them farewell and waited to have my second bowl of soup dropped off, which I was not looking forward to.

I reached up to rub at my hot forehead, frowning as I withdrew my hand with a grimace at the sight of sweat on it. I slumped back against the pillows, breathing out a long sigh before slipping off into sleep.

Yeah, let's fall asleep in the middle of a war with a fever in my enemy's land.

Not one for your best ideas, Hades.

The nightmare was eerie and dark. I was still laying in the bed in Seth's temple, as if I hadn't even fallen asleep, but the air was cold and the room was dark from the storm clouds outside. I felt unbelievably heavy. I tried to get up to close the balcony window, but I could barely move from the bed. I sucked in a deep breath, blinked just as lightning flashed brightly through the room, making me hiss through my teeth. When the room cleared of light, Zeus was on top of me and my back pinned down, my eyes wide.

"Get off me!" I snarled instantly, pushing on his chest, but he caught my wrist and kissed in the inside of it. My heart hammered hard in my chest and I tried to get him of, tried to move away, but I still felt too heavy, pressured against the bed. Zeus chuckled low, dipping his head down to nudge my head back, his fangs scraping my adam's apple. I swallowed, sinking my hand into his hair to try and wrench his head back, but he didn't move. He bared his fangs and sank them into my throat, agony spreading through me. A scream burst past my lips as pain pulsed hot through my veins and I writhed, struggling against the invisible weight to push him off me.

Then the sound of skin ripping and instantly my throat filled with blood as I choked, spitting it up and struggling to breath. Zeus withdrew, spitting out the flesh he'd torn from my throat, blood splattered across his face and mine. He smirked down at me, licking his lips before he leaned in and kissed me on the mouth, swallowing the blood that bubbled past my lips. I cringed, wishing I could just die in this nightmare, but it was a nightmare and that would be too easy.

His hands trailed down the sides of my legs before he jerked them up on either side of his waist. I squeezed my eyes shut as pain rocketed up my spine as he forced himself inside me. I choked on another scream of agony, throwing my head back against the pillow.

Jesus friggin' Christ! Someone wake me up!

"Gods, you scream like such a whore, Hades," Zeus mocked, leaning down to whisper in my ear, making my skin crawl as I struggled to breath in between bloody screams, "You always were a good fuck. How about we invite some friends?"

"No!" He ignored me, like he always did. Minutes later, I was relieving all the torture Julius's men had set upon me with. Agony and panic beat me mercilessly as I continued to choke on blood that just kept coming. Even worse was the weight crushing me against the bed as hands grabbed at me everywhere, pulling, pinching, groping, clawing.

God! Someone wake me up! Wake me up!

Nemesis! Lucifer! Someone!

"Hades," Zeus breathed against my face, making me scream again, turning my head away, "Hades... Hades. Hades!" I shut my eyes tightly, then blinked them open and found myself standing above the city in Duat.

I froze, staring out over the city, hot dry wind whipping my hair and clothes around, rain sprinkling across the buildings and the occasional flash of lightning. Breathingly heavy, I blinked rapidly, looking around and realizing I was on the ledge just off the lounge room. Behind me, Lucifer was shouting my name, holding his hand out toward me and my sons gaping at me from further in the room. I looked around, my heart still hammering and pulse racing. My toes were just off the edge of the ledge, bare and wet from the rain.

"Hades! Get the hell away from there!" Lucifer shouted just a growl of thunder expoded over head. I shuddered as it went through me, and I struggled to calm my breathing, but a flash of lightning blinded me and I hissed, stepping away from it and a moment later, Lucifer's arms were under mine, yanking me away from the ledge. He fell back onto a lounge chair, pulling me with him.

"Hades? Are you all right? Are you with me?" Lucifer demanded, pulling the hair away from my face. I blinked, looking up at him for a moment and a flash of panic went through me with his hands touching my chest. I snarled at him and shoved his arms off me, breaking away from him and struggling to stay on my feet, but my knees buckled and I hit the floor.

"Hades, calm down, you're all right," Lucifer said, quickly getting to his feet and moving toward me, "You're not on Olympus--"

"Shut up! Nobody asked you, get away from me!" I snarled, scooting back across the floor. I reached up to touch my throat, making sure it was still there. I looked down at my arms and legs, completely untouched, not bleeding, not broken. I touched my face, my lips and ran my nails through my hair. My face felt hot from fever and my heart was still pounding.

I felt like I was dying. Was this dying? Was I dying?

"Hades, you're hyperventilating." Lucifer warned, making his way over to me, kneeling down beside me, "Calm down."

"What's going on?" Malachi demanded, taking a step forward, but Adrian took him by the arm and drew him back, giving him a head shake. Malachi looked at him confused. My panic only rose as I realized Adrian had caught onto it.

Shit, shit, shit.

Stop freaking out!

"I've never seen him do that," Theo vouched, looking at Malachi in confusion, "Why is he doing that?" Malachi shook his head. Lucifer looked up.

"All of you need to leave." He commanded. They stared at him, baffled.

"Absolutely not," Charon exclaimed, glaring at Lucifer, "He's having a panic attack."

"Why is he having a panic attack?" Zelios asked, confused. I grimaced, feeling my throat close up and Lucifer cursed as I fell back on the floor, gasping for breath.

"Leave! You're stressing him out! We'll talk about it later!" Lucifer ordered. My sons glared at him for the longest time before reluctantly leaving the room. Lucifer turned to look down at me, grabbing the sides of my face to steady my head from lolling about. I panted for breath, grabbing his arms without even realizing it as he looked down at me.

"Hades, calm down," Lucifer told me in an impossibly gentle voice, "You're all right. You're okay. Zeus isn't here. Julius's men are not here. It's just me and I swear to God, I will not hurt you, do you understand me? I won't hurt you. You're safe, Hades." I glared at him, struggling to gasp for breath. I wasn't sure what about his words made me angry, or the fact that he said them. Maybe it was because it wasn't true. Maybe it was the fact that he said it now, but if he tricked me into a relationship, he'd change his mind halfway through, like Persephone did, like Atros did, like Eumelia did.

"You're okay." Lucifer repeated sternly. I swallowed tightly.

"No, I'm not." I said between gasps. Lucifer's eyes glowed for a moment, not red, but their usual blue selves. He leaned in and touched his lips to mine, but pulled back quick. Just a quick kiss on the lips that left me speechless and staring at him in silence, as I slowly managed to regulate my breathing. He frowned, dropping his hands from my face.

"Do you know where you are?" He asked. I frowned, glancing around the room, still rubbing at my throat warily.

"Duat. Seth's temple."

"Do you know what you did?"

"Uh, just now, or over the past few millenia?"

"Just now."

"Probably something stupid."

"Just a bit," Lucifer admitted with a grimace and helped me get to my feet, but I was still wobbly, so I sat on the lounge chair and Lucifer sat beside me, "You were hallucinating. I wasn't sure what about, but you were screaming and beating the living crap out of anyone who got in your way and as a god, that's an awfully dangerous thing for you to do. You ran into the lounge in the middle of dinner and tried to jump off the ledge." I scowled. I didn't remember any of that. I only remember... Zeus biting my throat open and his hands on me. A shudder went up my spine and I covered my mouth, elbow on my knee as I avoided Lucifer's probing stare. He lifted his hand to touch me, but when I tensed, he dropped it to his lap.

"Hades. You need to talk about this. I know you hate it when I bring it up--"

"Why do I need to talk about it," I hissed at him angrily, dropping my hand to my knee angrily, glaring at him, "What is there to talk about? You deduced what happened. There's nothing else to say about it. It doesn't matter. It's done. Over. Nothing I say will make it go away. It won't make me feel better either. I don't see how exposing myself will make myself feel better." Lucifer frowned.

"You can't keep bottling it all up. You've done a surprisingly good job of it so far, but one day, it's all going to build up and it's going to explode and you could really hurt yourself or someone else. One of your sons, knowing your luck. You almost bashed Cerberus's head open when he tried to grab you on your way to the ledge. You're just lucky he's one of the most powerful creatures on the planet." He pointed out. My stomach dropped at that. I didn't remember running into Cerberus at all, even worse, trying to hurt him.

Cerberus was one of my greatest creations. It's taken me months upon months, failure after failure, and even the death of his twin, to get him into being. And that was just to create him as a toddler. He was the first successful, powerful artificial in the world. That was the scientist in me talking. The father in me, the one I had struggled to push far below the surface, was horrified. I'd done plenty of awful things to my sons, but beating them enough to almost kill them?

Those were my sons.

I'd literally given up my ass for them.

"I can't," I said after a moment, then shook my head, raking a hand through my hair, "Talking about it won't make anything better. If anything, it'll make it worse." Lucifer frowned.

"And why is that?" He asked. I glared at him.

"I'm Hades, Lord of the Underworld. I fought in the Titanomachy. I am the brother of Zeus and Poseidon. Mortals worshipped me for centuries, and some still do. I'm a god. Do you know what people will think of me after they find out that I'm just another hapless victim? I won't be Hades, god of the Underworld anymore. I'll be," I paused angrily, waving my hands for emphasis, "Hades, god of the pathetic shits that can't defend themselves against their own brothers. God of stupidity. No one will fear me or worship me. Victims are never worshipped, Lucifer. Gods are."

"And you think if your sons found out about it, they would no longer fear you? You'd rather they continue thinking you're an asshole? A slut, no less that. Words from the rumors, mind you, not mine."

"I'd rather them think I was a damn prostitute than a victim," I seethed, getting to my feet, and Lucifer shot to his feet to help steady me, but I yanked my arm out of his grasp, glaring at him, "I am not a victim. I am not helpless. I've lived this long without anyone's damn help, and I sure as hell don't need it now. I'm tired from the fever, that's it. It was just an episode based on Recharge. Nothing more. This conversation never happened. You're not telling my sons. Tell them I just had a nightmare because of the fever. I'm going back to bed, and you're going to bring me some soup and tell me exactly what you told my sons so I know you, too, didn't betray me." Lucifer frowned, but said nothing as I moved away from him and went toward the hallway.

My whole body ached with pain. I could still feel the hands on me, Zeus's fangs at in my throat. I kept feeling the urge to touch my throat and suck in deep breathes to make sure that this wasn't the dream, that the attack on me in my bed was the dream. I shuddered again, feeling goosebumps creep across my skin.

I went to my room and shut the door, leaning against it for a moment to take a few deep breathes before moving toward the bed, but the instant I got near it, a flashback of my nightmare blocked my vision and I cursed, backing away from it, raking my nails through my hair as I paced the room.

You can't keep bottling it up... one day, it's all going to build up and it's going to explode and you could really hurt yourself or someone else.

Ugh! I went to the bathroom to shower, setting the water to ice cold to wake me up. I stepped out, wrapping a towel around my waist and swiping a smaller one off the rack to dry my hair as I walked out to see Lucifer sitting on the bed beside the nightstand where my bowl of soup sat. I sighed in relief, walking over to it. Even though it tasted like shit, I kept in mind that in no time, I would be able to use my powers and my night vision again.

"Your sons are angry with me." Lucifer said hollowly. I frowned, glancing at him as I licked my lips and set the empty bowl down.

"So what?"

"Ambrosius is mad at me."

"Sorry to turn your son against you," I said dryly, moving to the wardrobe across the room, "But they don't need to know. They shouldn't have that kind of shit running around in their heads anyway. We're at war. We don't have time for my petty personal life." Lucifer clenched his teeth, fisting the sheets before he shot to his feet and turned to glare at me.

"Why do you keep acting like your feelings are petty? Why mine are?"

"Because they are," I said flatly, taking down a tank top to study it before tossing it on the bed before stooping to search for pants, "If it weren't for them, this world would probably run much smoother." I felt a draft of air and spun around to see Lucifer behind me. I glared at him, clenching my fist in a pair of pants before throwing them at his face. He caught them and tossed them on the bed before turning back to me. I arched my neck and stuck my nose in the air, narrowing my eyes at him, hoping he'd catch my drift of go the fuck away, but Lucifer was never very bright.

Ha, bad joke.

"Enough," Lucifer snapped when he saw me smirking and his tone wiped the smirk right off my face as I scowled, "Stop making this into some kind of joke."

"Your name is some kind of joke."

"That doesn't even make sense."

"It's an inside joke."

"With whom?"

"Myself."

"Hades," Lucifer said, distressed as he covered his face with a hand in exasperation before he dropped it and glared impatiently at me, "I'm trying to take this seriously. You need help."

"At least I'm not using you as a blood bag." I deadpanned. Lucifer surprised me with a blush.

"I didn't mean for it to come out like that, and before you start poking me full of holes over that, maybe you should think about the fact that you came to me and asked me to drink your blood because you felt you had to, to fight in a war. You were using me."

"Doesn't feel great now, does it?"

"Gets better," Lucifer seethed in irritation, making me frown, "You used me for sex. I meant to get you drunk that first night to relax you. I felt your distress, even though you were silent. And then it led to sex."

"So you never wanted me in the first place."

"Stop twisting my words!"

"Then stop twisting your thumb up my ass about this whole feelings thing," I protested angrily, shoving him back and watching his eyes flash from blue to red, then back again, "Oh what? You think you can put the beat down on me because I rumpled your nice shirt?" Lucifer's nostrils flared, eyes turning red again. I could feel the heat of his rage from here.

"I am not fighting you," He said slowly, moving away from me, his eyes turning blue again, "No. You're weak. You're tired. You're stressed. Lay down and--"

"Lucy, heads up." I mocked. Lucifer scowled, turning just as I grabbed him by the shoulder, spun him around, and socked him right in the nose. Lucifer hissed, stumbling back. He reached up, touched his blood as a droplet of blood trickled out. He stared at it, then looked up at me as I put a hand on my hip.

"Aw, did I hurt your precious face?" I taunted. Lucifer fumed and lunged at me, grabbing me and shoving me back against the wardrobe doors that rattled and cracked slightly under the pressure. I bashed my head against his and he stepped back, seething. He punched me in the jaw, causing my head to snap to the side. I blinked, whistling low as I touched the cut in my lip before laughing.

"About time you get violent. I was starting to think you were just wearing a fake penis this whole time." I told him. Lucifer's eyes turned red and his fangs elongated as he snarled at me before grabbing me and throwing me onto the floor. I rolled and shot back up to my feet, smirking at him.

"Then I guess that makes you stupid," Lucifer sneered, "Because you're the one who wouldn't be able to tell the difference between a man or a woman." I twitched and went to punch him in the nose again, but he caught my wrist and spun me around, shoving me back. He was fighting defensively and that just pissed me off further.

"I don't want to hurt you." Lucifer warned. I glared at him.

"In case you haven't noticed," I said, then dropped the towel from my waist, watching Lucifer blush slightly before glaring at me, "I'm a man. You couldn't hurt me even if you tried, Lucy."

"Stop calling me that!"

"What're you gonna do if I don't? Slip volumizing shampoo into my shower? Switch my Axe body spray with your vanilla cookie perfume?"

"Hades, if you don't stop talking, I'm going to break your neck."

"Do it, Lucy. I dare you." I mocked. Lucifer lunged at me and grabbed me by the throat, but I wrenched out of his grip and spun around, swinging my elbow back into his ribs. He cursed, doubling over, but not before grabbing me around the waist and dragging me down to the floor. I gasped, my head smacking into the floor. I bared my fangs and snarled animalistically, whirling around to bash my elbow into Lucifer's jaw. He cursed and grabbed my wrists, pinning them down on the floor on either side of my head. He glared down at me, breathing heavily with rage, blue eyes now completely red and his fangs elongated, dripping with saliva, the blood caked around his nose.

And I glared back at him menacingly, panting and ready to ram my knee into his groin if I had to.

We glared at each other for the longest time... before I rammed my knee into his gut and he groaned, rolling over. I swept to my feet, moving to grab my towel up off the floor, but Lucifer rolled over, grabbed my ankle, and tore me back down onto the floor, climbing on top of me and whacking my head against the floor. I cursed as pain exploded in my skull, and intensified when I brought my head back into his. He cursed, falling back against the end of the bed as I scrambled away from him and spun around, putting my back to the wall. He wiped the blood off his face, staring at it before looking up at me.

I stared back at him, reaching back to touch the back of my head, hissing at the tender spot there and what felt like blood, but the wound was already healing. I looked at the blood on my fingertips, then looked at Lucifer, who continued to stare at me.

And then I laughed.

I wasn't sure why.

Just something about the way Lucifer sat there, bloody and disheveled was hilarious. He scowled at me for a moment, before I showed him the blood on my fingers. He tilted his head in confusion before he smirked at me, still looking a bit lost.

"You... are one strange person, Hades." He said, wiping at his nose with his sleeve now before taking it off to hold it against his nose. I shrugged, sitting with my legs splayed out, the towel sitting too far out of my reach for me to want to go get it. Lucifer's eyes wandered down to my groin, and my body instantly reacted to his stare. I bit my bottom lip.

"Should we just call all that foreplay?" I asked. Lucifer stared at me for a while longer as if I were insane, and oddly enough, it just turned me on even more.

"You and I have completely different definitions of foreplay." He admitted, but it didn't stop him from moving over to me. I spread my legs and let him lean in, slowly capturing my lips in a deep, hungry kiss. And unwanted tremor of fear stole up my spine, but Lucifer moved his hands around behind me, cupping my ass. He slid me up against the wall until he was standing and my legs were wrapped around his waist. His lips hovered over mine, his eyes slowly turning blue once again.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" He murmured.

"I wouldn't be instigating it if I wasn't." I muttered, then reached up, twisting my hands in his hair and jerking him into a bruising kiss, our teeth clicking and tongues dancing desperately. I groped feverishly, feeling the sudden urge to have him inside me. It was driving me insane. Lucifer reached down, struggling not to drop me, so I smacked his hands away, moving them back to my ass so I could reach between us, undoing his fly and taking him out. I pulled myself up and lowered myself down on top of him, hearing him hiss out through clenched teeth.

"Not so fast." He hissed. I chuckled breathlessly.

"Don't be a prude."

"I'm hurting you. I know I am, because you're laughing and you only do that when you're in pain or someone else is in pain."

"You know me too well." I breathed, tilting my head back against the wall, groaning as he filled me, stretching me wide open, muscles burning. Lucifer cursed under his breath, keeping his arms around me, carrying me to the bed. He sat down and I settled back into his lap, this time with proper lubrication. I moaned, burying my face against his throat, inhaling the deep sweet scent of him.

"I was joking about the vanilla." I murmured against his skin, trailing my tongue up to his ear to suck at his earlobe. He growled low in his throat, running his hand through my hair to cup the back of my head.

"You don't need volumizing shampoo." He said into my ear. I laughed, squeezing him against me tighter. He smiled against my skin and I waited for him to bite me at some point, but he didn't. I gave his hair a tug, pulling back to touch our foreheads together.

"Bite me," I told him, watching his blue eyes darken and he started to speak, but I nipped at his nose to shut him up, "I'm not stupid. I'm not going to put a buffet out in front of a starving man and not let him eat."

"You would."

"You're... different." I said, catching myself before I almost said special. Yeah, special. Special like... I don't know. I couldn't think straight. Not with Lucifer licking at my throat. I clenched my teeth, moaning as he slid his fangs very gently into the space between my shoulder and throat. He only suckled a bit before taking his mouth away and moving it to cover mine.

And a moment later, I came before slumping against him as he emptied himself inside me and we fell back on the bed, my back to him. He propped himself up on his elbow, laying on his side so his chest was brushing my back.

"Is this going to happen every single time we get into fight?"

"Probably."

"What about when we're not fighting?"

"I don't know." I said briefly, then yawned to let him know I was tired. He sighed, but said nothing more. I laid against the pillow, closing my eyes, forcing my breathing to steady out. Once Lucifer thought I was asleep, he ran his hand through my hair and leaned down to kiss my temple.

"Yes, you do." He whispered in my ear, then slipped away to the shower, leaving to lay there in silence, a wad of fear welling up in my throat.

I did.

And it freaked me out.