"Really, all things considered, I think I made out kinda well," Amaya said, gesturing to herself. "It could've been a whole hell of a lot worse."

"I'm glad you're ok," I said honestly, looking across the table at her. "I can't imagine being in that kind of situation. It's awful, I'm so sorry.

"It was rough," she continued, waving my apology off, "but Erwin was a hero. He's the only reason any of us had a chance of making it out alive. We owe our lives to him." Her eyes softened as she got lost in thought, before she shook her head to rid herself of whatever it was that occupied her mind. She then looked at me. "You were close with him, weren't you? I know he used to be sweet on you, he told me as much."

"For a while he was, yeah," I said, laughing a bit at the memory. "But as we got older, he felt more like a big brother to me, the one I never had."

"I like to think of him as everyone's big brother," Amaya said with a smile. "That's the dynamic we settled into as well. He's just got that natural charisma and it's easy to feel..." She trailed off as though to think about it.

"Like you can trust him," I finished for her, getting a nod in response. "It's just strange to be without him," I said. The conversation stalled for a bit from there, as each of us began to think of what – of who – had been lost, and the impact he'd had on our lives. And not just Erwin. Mike, too.

We were out to dinner, a triple date of sorts; Hange and Moblit, Amaya and Mason, myself and Levi. Well, actually, for right now there were four of us were out to dinner, for Hange and Moblit were running late... due to Hange, no doubt.

By making out "kinda well", Amaya meant that in the battle that had taken Erwin's life, and the "incident" that had taken Mike's, she'd gotten her left leg injured, an assortment of new scars dashed across her body, and she lost her left ear.

By the miracles of modern medicine and science and the wonders of physical therapy, she'd be just fine, thankfully, with time and love and patience. But seeing the way Mason looked at her, I figured she had more than enough of all three.

The restaurant we were in was dimly lit, decorated plainly, yet it was intimate with a romantic kind of atmosphere. Which made it all the better, I supposed, if we were to reveal the date of our wedding to them tonight. If I remember to, that is.

Among all the other preparations for what would assuredly be the happiest day of my life, we at least had a date set now. We had no venue yet, no flowers or cutlery or decorations decided upon, but we had a day.

We had been considering November 20th. While the date of the "incident" as the military so eloquently put it, it was also our anniversary; not the engagement, but when we started dating officially. However, we felt it disrespectful to celebrate our wedding on the same day that Erwin and Mike had lost their lives, nor on the day that would forever remain stained in his memory as the day that nearly killed him.

While we couldn't change our anniversary, that would remain the sole spot of light on an otherwise bleak day.

What we settled on was a wintry sort of wedding, set in February - a very lovey-dicey month, of course, but that wasn't the only reason. It wasn't like we were having it on Valentine's Day. No, we settled on the 21st, actually.

So if nothing else, at least the date was set, and it was no longer subject to change nor was it debatable. Of course, it'd taken a lot of back and forth between myself and my mom, because she wanted to have a hand in planning it. Obviously, I wanted her involved, but not too involved. She'd already had her wedding. If she wanted to plan another ceremony for herself, she and dad could renew their vows.

...

How soon was too soon after Levi and I get married to renew our own vows?

I smiled a little upon realizing it; all I wanted to do was proclaim my love for him, over and over and over again. Whether publicly or alone at home, I just wanted to tell him a million times over how much I loved him. After going so long unsure whether he would ever come home to me, now that he was, I was going to make the most of it.

No more hesitations. No more fear. No more doubting anything.

I would speak what I wanted. I would speak my desires. And beyond that, I would bring them into existence.

He was worth that much to me; for me to be honest not only with him, but with myself, on what I wanted. What I wanted for us. Where I wanted to go.

And now... I wanted to hold his hand. And so I started to reach towards him, only to have the sudden weight of another person on being thrown on my shoulders. A startled yelp – an incredibly embarrassing one, too – escaped my lips involuntarily as I pitched forward in my seat.

"(Y/n)!"

"Hange," I exclaimed, happy to see them but upset that as always, this was how I was greeted. Perhaps I shouldn't have been surprised; this was how it always went when they were around. "Think I could have a little bit of warning next time?"

"No," they answered quickly and very happily, their arms winding around my shoulders.

Hange rested their cheek against mine, hugging me lovingly, seeming to me to be something like a large, overly affectionate dog. Or a cuddly bear. A grizzly, perhaps. Either way, Hange was overbearing in their hug, overwhelming in their love. Just as always.

"I have to keep you on your toes, (Y/n)," they continued. "Are we late?"

"Not as late as usual," Amaya piped up, an amused smile on her lips.

"But still late," Levi said. "Now get off of her."

"So protective of your lover," Hange chimed, pretending to be disappointed even as they drew away from me.

"How've you been, Moblit?" I asked, peeking around Hange to see him.

"Tired," he answered. "But that's nothing new." His hands were in his pockets in a lazy sort of way, and he shrugged, completely nonplussed about something or other. "When did this place open up?"

"About a year ago," Mason answered. "Don't you live around here?"

"Yeah," Moblit answered, looking around curiously, "but I'm usually too tired by the time I leave the lab to think about going out to eat."

"Don't you ever sleep?" I asked, watching as he and Hange made their way to the seats left open for them.

"Sometimes," Moblit said with a sigh. "Not nearly as much as I would like to."

"No amount of research is worth that kind of strain on your body," Amaya said. "It may be dark in here, but anyone can see that your eyebags have eyebags."

"Yeah, well, we're here, and I'm not going to turn in early on my first night out in weeks."

"Fair enough," Mason said. "Been a while since all of us went out together."

"So, are we going dancing later?" Hange asked, settling into their seat.

I could almost hear Levi's mood sour at the prospect of dancing. But he wasn't the only one.

Amaya frowned, sharing a look with Mason before looking back at Hange. "I can't really dance at the moment," Amaya said. "Sorry."

"Be more sensitive, Hange," Moblit chided. "I think the last thing they want to do is dance."

"Dancing's not quite what Levi's doctor ordered," I said. "Maybe one day we can all go out clubbing again, but not now."

"Damn," Hange said. "Well, alright. Have you guys ordered?"

"Been waiting on you, four-eyes," Levi said, glaring at them sidelong.

"Oh, how sweet," Hange cooed playfully. "Let's flag a waiter down then, shall we?"

---

Days later, I flopped down onto the bed on my back, the mattress dipping under my weight. I let out a low groan as I stretched my limbs out, exhausted but happy from the day's events. Recently, we'd been a lot busier. There was certainly lots to do, what with the wedding and Levi's appointments and everything else we needed to do.

Added to all that, however, was house hunting, which was exciting indeed! With the temperamental elevators of this building and the fact that we just weren't on the first floor, coupled with the fact that this apartment wasn't exactly wheelchair friendly, we'd started searching for somewhere better to live.

We'd gone to an open house today, visited several potential venues for our wedding, and went to a flower shop to start looking at options for bouquets and decorations and things like that. All of this, on a Saturday, one of our limited days off. And I was now exhausted. A low, lazy yawn escaped my lips as I relaxed, rolling over onto my stomach to get comfortable.

I'd already helped Levi to the bed, as he'd requested. I of course obliged, and he sat now with his legs straight out before him and leaning back on his hands, right next to me. "Tired?"

"Mm," I hummed in reply, my eyes fluttering closed. When one of his hands wound into my hair, gently running through it, another contented hum left me. "That feels nice."

"More?"

"Please," I said, smiling now. With nothing more said, he eased himself closer and I tucked my hands under my chin, knowing already where he was going. But when he went to get to his knees and swing one leg over to sit above my hips, a strained, nearly pained hiss escaped his lips, one that he tried to hide. I rolled away before he could settle atop me, just as he made to school his face into a neutral expression.

"Levi," I began to chastise, "I don't need you killing yourself just to play with my hair or give me a massage."

"I wasn't-"

"Come on," I cut him off. "Don't lie to me. It hurt you, I heard it."

"I'm fine," he pressed. "I want to do it, so just calm down and let me. If I was in pain, I'd tell you."

"You really want to do it that badly?" I got no reply, which was a reply in and of itself. "Alright. Here. Sit against the headboard."

I helped him get there, pressing his back gently against the headboard. I lowered myself to sit between his legs and leaned back against his chest. When both of us were comfortable, he let out a breath as though to make himself relax before winding one hand around me with the other running up into my hair.

I slid down his body a little, my eyes closing as I got lost in the feeling once more. There was just something special about someone caring enough to do this, and without being asked. It just felt good; there was no other way to put it.

And I loved the strange juxtaposition of his body, the hard expanse of his toned chest and muscled arms being so soft to lay against, and so gentle when his fingers began to run through my hair. He had the strength to kill, and yet held me as though I was made of glass and might break from even the lightest of touches.

His caress was so cherishing, so reverent. It was wonderful.

"I suppose it's going to be time for us to start on dinner soon," I mused. But then I closed my eyes. "But I'm just too comfy right now, I don't want to go anywhere."

"Then don't. I'm not hungry yet, anyway." A few quite minutes passed then, and we took the time to just be. I was enjoying being held, and he was enjoying holding me. When his arm grew tired and he took to just linking his fingers over my stomach and keeping me close, I had no objections, not even when he broke the silence to speak. "Did you like the house we visited today?"

"It was nice," I said. "I just wish the yard was bigger."

"Hm? I thought it was fine."

"How am I supposed to save all the dogs I can if the yard is that small? Be smarter about this, Levi."

I didn't even have to look to know that one of his eyebrows was quirked up and he was looking down at me with that amused look in his eyes. "Plan all of this while I was away?"

"If I can't have the warm embrace of my man to keep me warm at night," I said, "I can at least have a lot of dogs. Or cats, maybe. Only they'd lie on my head and try to kill me in my sleep. Meg's cat tried doing that to me one night when I stayed over on their couch."

"You shouldn't have taken its spot, then."

"Don't start," I said, even as a smile appeared on my face. "That was the first night the cat didn't sleep at the foot of their bed with them. The damn thing was trying to kill me."

"You must have offended it somehow."

"How would I offend a cat?! I was the only reason Meg adopted her! She didn't even look at that cat before I saw her and pointed her out and she fell in love!"

"Maybe that's the problem."

"What, the cat didn't want to get adopted? I find that hard to believe." I huffed. "I think it just thinks I was trying to encroach on its territory or something. It was such an asshole."

"Right," he said, if only to placate me. "A bigger yard, then. Is that all?"

"Well," I said, considering it, "the stonework out front seemed a bit awkward, no?"

"Are you a stonemason now?"

"No," I said. "I just know what looks good."

"Uh-huh. What next? Was the bedroom a bit small for your liking?"

"Now that you mention it..."

"How much room could you possibly need in a bedroom?"

I opened my eyes and tilted my head back to look at him cheekily. "You of all people should know how creative I can be."

That got a rare snort of a laugh out of him, and he redirected my head with his hand set atop it to direct me to look forward again. "You're impossible."

"You love me, really."

"Do I? I wonder."

"Very funny." I eased out of his arms only to turn, setting my hands atop his thighs before leaning in just close enough to be teasing. He craned his head upwards, trying to kiss me, but I leaned back almost imperceptibly, remaining just out of reach.

"Any particular reason why you're acting like a brat?"

"Gee, I wonder," I mused playfully. "My favorite person on this planet just said that he wonders if he loves me. I wonder whatever could be the matter with me."

"Here I thought you'd be used to this by now," he said, a satisfied little smirk finding its way onto his lips. It faded quickly, and he seemed to be confused by something, nearly perplexed.

"Everything alright, love?"

"Am I forgetting anything?"

"With regards to...?"

"I don't know."

"My, aren't you helpful?"

"Neither are you."

"You don't even know what you want me to help you with!"

"Shut up. I think I was going to tell you something."

He glanced away, still mystified by something or other. When he looked my way again, our eyes met only for a second before took my face gently into his hands and drew me close. Our lips met in a sweet kiss full of love. Far too suspicious to sink any further into his embrace, I pulled away.

"Mm," I said, satisfied with the kiss but eager to figure out what he was playing at. "So. Is that what you were going to tell me?"

"No, I don't think so."

"What, then? What were you going to tell me?"

"I don't remember."

"Ah, well that's too bad," I sighed playfully. "Maybe with another kiss you'll remember."

"Certainly worth a try, no?"

I smiled into our next kiss. It only grew with the next kiss, followed by the next. My smile grew so much I could hardly kiss him anymore and I giggled against him when he sighed and drew away.

"Stop smiling and kiss me properly."

"Sorry, sorry," I placated, tilting my head and drawing him in for a deeper kiss.

It didn't work. I kept smiling. But despite the fact that me kissing him was a lost cause, there was nothing keeping him from kissing me, and he did.

---

If Levi and I were excited for the wedding, our parents' excitement surpassed us a million times over. Well, to be more specific, and far more accurate... it was our mothers whose excitement surpassed our own.

My father, and Levi's, seemed content to just sit back and watch as their wives bickered and debated and shared ideas as though they themselves were getting remarried... which wasn't happening, to my knowledge.

Honestly, I wasn't sure exactly how they could've been more excited than me, they somehow were able to.

And seeing those two try to come to a decision about something trivial was exhausting.

Levi and I, for the most part, made a very good team. Even if we had differing opinions about something, like the flowers for example, never would our conversations grow heated; they were flowers, for goodness' sake. We were quite good at compromising... and if we couldn't come to a proper compromise, Levi was growing more and more attached to the idea of happy wife, happy life.

Anyway, some things just weren't worth arguing over. But it seemed that everyone wanted a hand in planning our wedding. Was the help appreciated? Of course. But when their "help" became more detrimental than productive for us, well...

"God," I groaned aloud, lowering myself to the couch beside Levi. "I'm exhausted."

"Looking at flowers is enough to tire you out?"

"You know damn well we did a hell of a lot more than that," I huffed. "I just feel like we're doing a lot of work, but nothing is getting done."

"We're taking small steps," he said in a rare attempt to reassure me – at least, without too much teasing involved beforehand. "It'll all get done."

"Not just that," I prattled on. "Mom just will not come to a decision about cutlery, of all things. Of all the stupid things to get hung up on..."

"You still want her involved, don't you?"

"Of course," I said.

"Do you actually give a shit about what cutlery we use?"

"Not really."

"Then I don't see an issue letting her debate it by herself. Do you?"

"No," I agreed, "but I'd appreciate it if she could figure it out before the damn wedding. It really shouldn't be that difficult."

"She wants it to be perfect, just as we do."

"I know," I said, sighing and slumping over to rest my cheek against his shoulder. "I just want to hurry up and marry you." He set his arm around me, and we both adjusted to get more comfortable against each other. "I just think we've both been through enough, you know. Our wedding should just go off without a hitch. But this is just stressing me the hell out."

"Don't let what other people are doing stress you out this much," he advised, his voice strong and confident, almost overly so; and that was what tipped me off to know that he wasn't just saying this to shut me up, he genuinely wanted me to feel better, even if this wasn't his forte – speaking from the heart like this, anyway, and being encouraging.

"I know you want it to be perfect," he continued. "And I know that you're going to keep stressing out anyway. Just try not to freak yourself out, alright? You have the final say in everything, so no matter how much they argue and bicker, you'll still be the one signing off on everything."

"Ooh," I said, laughing a little, "I like the way that sounds. Makes me feel like some kind of boss."

"Well," he said, "aren't you the boss of this wedding?"

"Now don't go making me sound like a dictator or something," I said, lifting my head from his shoulder to look at him incredulously. At least, I tried to. But when I locked eyes with his and saw his smirk, I couldn't help but break out into my own smile. "It's our wedding," I reminded him with a laugh. "Not just mine."

"Could've fooled me."

Now I knew he was just fucking with me.

I got to my knees facing him, playfully grabbing his shoulders. "I'm not a totalitarian, I swear!"

All he did in response was raise one eyebrow up, perfectly arched to ask if I was serious or not.

"Ok, funny guy," I said, swinging one leg over his to settle atop his lap.

I lowered his weight atop him slowly, lightly, knowing better than to just lower myself abruptly. I couldn't do that anymore, not with his injuries. But if I did so gradually and gently, being mindful of his injured leg and keeping most of my weight to the other side, I could comfortably sit in the way he liked me to so much.

I ran my hands along his arms, trailing up his neck only to settle on his cheeks, ensuring he didn't look away. With a wide smile I pressed my forehead to his, and in this way, I knew that I had – and would continue to have – his attention.

Being atop him in his favorite spot, with his hands against my waist to keep me close, just where he liked me to be? This was the surest way to steal his attention away from anything and everything.

"It's our wedding," I said, "and you know that."

"Our wedding," he said, "and yet we're not having even one display of poinsettias."

"Oh, my god," I laughed, leaning away from him slightly. "Poinsettias are a winter flower, Levi! It's like, the Christmas flower!"

"And were you not the one who said that my birthday should be on December 25th?"

"I was," I began to say, "but-"

"And was that not an important part of our relationship?"

"That's..." I bit my bottom lip, trying so hard not to reveal my smile to him, not to let my laughter out. When my face was as serious as I could make it, I drew a deep breath in through my nose. "That's true. However..."

"However," he echoed, effectively cutting me off, "it doesn't matter that much to you. Is that it? Or does it ruin your aesthetic? Would the poinsettias clash with your bridesmaids' dresses?"

"You're relentless," I said, letting out that breath through a quick huff. My mood sobered rather quickly however, once I thought of the possibility that perhaps there were things that he didn't like. "Are you... Um. Are there things you would change?"

"No, baby," he said. "I'm only teasing."

"I figured," I said, relaxing a little. "But still, you do know that... if there are things you want to change, you can, right? This is our wedding and I want it to be perfect. Not just perfect for me, but perfect for you. For us."

"I know. And you're doing fine so far."

"Oh, good," I said sarcastically, my shoulders slumping as I relaxed. My fingers linked behind his neck, and I leaned in, pressing a kiss to his forehead. "But... only a fine job?"

"I'm not giving up on the flowers."

I snorted with laughter, knowing by now that he didn't mean it, not at all. "Is that right?"

"It's going to be fine," he said, bored feline eyes meeting mine as he leaned his head back against the couch. One of his hands tucked under my chin, tipping it upwards. "For the record, there's not a damn thing that I would change. You're going to be a beautiful bride."

Well, that made me smile.

"My, aren't you a sweetheart," I cooed. "Feeling more lovey-dovey than usual?"

"No," he said. "It's not sweet. Just the truth."

"...which just so happens to be sweet."

"If you say so."

"You're such a pain in the ass," I said, my smile shining through despite my sigh. "You're lucky I love you." I began to lean in, and Levi's head tilted to the side slightly, anticipating my kiss. But then I pulled away, climbing off his lap entirely and getting to my feet. "I should get started on dinner, no?"

He merely clicked his tongue in response, clearly unhappy that he didn't get his kiss. "Who's the pain in the ass now?"

I threw him a wink, looking over my shoulder at him. "Yet you love me anyway."