Alec was gone by the time Casey had awoke once more and with a sour taste in his mouth he recalled that he had a wedding to plan. He slid from his bed, gritting his teeth as a wave of pain rippled through him. He reached for his stele that sat on his bedside table, and etched a rune below his collarbone remembering how Jace had told him that the closer the rune was to your heart the longer it would last.

And Casey needed the pain to stay away for a while. A small smile slithered onto the raven haired beautys face as he caught sight of the onyx suit that Isabelle had no doubt laid out for him. Slipping the suit on Casey looked at himself in the mirror and for the first time since he had been brought into this chaotic world, he saw how different he really was.

His eyes were duller, dark circles from lack of sleep engulfing them. His hair didn't have the same shine as it used to and his posture seemed to slump slightly. The loss of Alec and his father had taken a toll on him, he could no longer deny it. He tried to make the best of his appearance, covering the dark circles up with concealer and dragging a brush through his hair. But at best he looked presentable. He just didn't look like Casey.

He slid out his room, shutting the door behind him as Isabelle's voice fluttered up the corridor.

"The cobalt blue. It's elegant yet masculine. Very Alec." The gorgeous young women told a fellow shadowhunter.

"And what colour is Alec's wedding dress going to be? Cobalt blue too? To match the curtains." Casey teased and Isabelle whirled round, grinning from ear to ear when she saw Casey. She barrelled into the boy, wrapping her arms around his waist.

"Casey you're okay." She breathed, unable to stop smiling as she stepped back. "We were all so worried when Jace said you had disappeared. Where did you go?"

"The portal sent me home." Casey answered honestly and Isabelle's eyebrows furrowed. But before she could question him , Jace's voice called Casey's name. He called his name and as he turned to face him he heard the regret in his voice and saw the pain in his eyes.

Jace felt as though he was looking at a different person. He had just found out that he was Valentine's son, which meant that Casey was not only his brother - but his twin. He felt so guilty for all the pain that he had caused Casey, even if he hadn't been his fault. And even now he couldn't remedy that. He couldn't tell him that his Jonathan was alive, for no one was sure what that information would do to him.

"Casey I am so so sorry." Jace whispered as tears clouded his vision and Casey smiled sadly. "You don't need to be sorry Jace. It's not your fault." A moment later Casey was in Jace's arms, and he held him so tightly that he almost struggled to breath, but he didn't comment as he wrapped his arms around his torso, his face burried in his chest.

Isabelle smiled sadly as she saw the two, knowing that the hug meant someone different to each of them. Jace was basically Casey's best friend, and well - Casey was his brother. And even before that, aside from Alec, Casey had been his closest friend. She saw how much pain had surrounded the institute when Casey didn't come home and then when he lay comatose.

It was horrendus, and if they ever lost Casey for good - it would break them all.

•°•°•°

"She looks so peaceful now." Clary commented as she stood beside their mother, Luke looming over her shoulder. Casey had sought refuge in the corner, not quite sure whether he wanted to see his mother up close at that moment.

The siblings reunion had been an emotional one, with both siblings crying as they embraced each other. After that, Clary had proceeded to tell Casey everything that he had missed - save for the part where it turned out that their brother was alive -, concluding with how they had rescued their mother.

"I'm looking for Lydia." The familiar voice of Alec echoed throughout the room and Casey's eyes dropped to the floor, embarrassment filling him at the recollection of how he had kissed Alec when he really shouldn't have. "Have any of you seen her? I don't mean to interupt or anything."

"No it's fine." Clary replied. "Stay for a minute." Casey's head snapped up at his sister's words and immediately Alec's eyes locked on his. He smiled at him, and he wished that he hadn't because he couldn't stop his heart from tugging in his chest.

"I've got to head back to the station." Luke announced and panic filled Casey. It was like a bad family gathering. Although Casey wasn't quite sure if he would know what a good family gathering was for he had never met any of his extended family. "Ring me if anything changes."

Luke left the room and Casey quickly scurried out after him, the awkward aura of that room suffocating him.

"You okay Casey?" Luke asked softly and Casey forced a smile.

"Never better." He lied. Luke knew he was lying but didn't push it, instead hugged the boy. "I had Raphael use compulsion." Luke spoke, changing the subject and Casey looked up at him in confusion, arching an eyebrow. "On the officers at the station." He elaborated. "So you've as much time off as you want. Raphael didn't want to do it at first until I said it was for you. You've really affected that vamps life Casey."

•°•°•°•

Clary and Jace had decided to visit Ragnor Fell with the help of Magnus Bane. Casey had decided to opt out of the mission, confiding in Magnus that for some reason Jace and Clary were being very weird around one another and Casey didn't feel like being in the middle of whatever was going on between them two.

Instead he had decided to visit the hotel du mort. Raphael had come acustomed to his spontaneous visits and so had ordered all his vampires to stay aware from him, warning that there would be punishment if any of them were to hurt him.

Due to this he easily entered the building, jumping slightly as Simon appeared behind him.

"Casey? You're awake!" He cheered, embracing him too tightly.

"Ow Simon, vampire strength." Casey hissed and Simon recoiled, spluttering out apologies.

"Have you seen Raphael?" He asked and Simon arched an eyebrow.

"Why do you want to see Raphael? Are you two. . ." He trailed off, crinkling his nose.

"Oh no. No, no." Casey exlaimed, shaking his head repeatedly and Simon sighed in relief. "He's my friend. I just want to talk with him." Furthermore, Casey was well aware that Raphael was asexual, but that was not something Casey felt was her place to inform Simon to put his suspicions at rest. Raphael had confided in Casey about it one night, telling him how he had never been interested in sex. Casey was proud of Raphael, and god did she ever love that vampire. He was so kind and caring behind that hard facade he put on.

"Casey?" A smooth voice drawled from behind him.

"You would be amazed how many people have said my name today." Casey snorted as he turned to face Raphael Santiago, Simon mumbling his goodbyes as he retreated.

Raphael used his vampire speed to move towards him, wrapping his arms around him. If anyone saw the two of them in that moment, no vampire would ever fear Raphael again. But no one was around, it was just the two of them. When they were with each other they were just Casey and Raphael, rather than being a vampire and a shadowhunter.

"Simon told me that they feared you wouldn't wake up." Raphael told him and Casey nodded as the two of them sat down. "Do you want to talk about what you saw?"

Casey's eyes met Raphael's and he tilted his head. "How do you know I saw anyone?" He questioned and Raphael smiled, showing him his fangs. "Because I know you Casey."

And so Casey told him everything that he had seen. The words poured out of his mouth as if this was the only time he could ever say them. He told Raphael about his father, and his brother and he sat there listening to him all along.

"I know that he's this . . . monster now Raphael. I know that. So why is there still a part of me that believes somewhere inside him is the man that I called my father many years ago?"

Raphael took Casey's hands in his, and the young boy took no notice of how cold his limbs were. "Because you are good Casey. And you are kind, and even though this world seems set on ruining you, you do your best to protect the ones you love. And you still love Valentine, whether you admit it or not. And that love Casey, the father - son bond that you once had with each other, that's dangerous. He is not the same man Casey, he will use your love for him against you. Bend you to do his will."

"But he's my father." He whispered and Raphael shook his head. "He was your father. That man is dead Casey, don't let him ruin you."

Casey nodded, blinking back his tears. "And what about Alec?" He questioned, aware of how Simon had left to attend the wedding.

"I'm not going." Casey said bluntly and Raphael sighed, impatiently. "Casey, when shadowhunters love they love for life. I know that you are only young, but you will never love anyone the way you love Alec. If you let him go Casey, you're letting your happiness go."

"And what of Lydia's happiness? She deserves to be happy just as much as Alec or I." Casey argued.

"Lydia will be content with their marriage, but never happy. She will care about Alec but never love him. Not like you love him."

"It's too late." Casey shrugged.

"Casey, it is only too late if you let it be. Now go, and remember what I said." Raphael told her, embracing him a final time.

•°•°•°•°

a/n
WOW! an update after twenty million years!?!? I'm so sorry for not writing anything, I don't even have a good reason other than I was really unmotivated. Buttttt I'm going back to school in just over a week and I want to get this story finished before then so I don't leave you all on a cliffhanger.

So expect a lot more updates today!