( chapter xxx. PERFECTION )

✦

Remelda Black was a woman of pride. It sat well on her features, as if it were just another piece of jewelry she used to ensure the look of excellence that had followed her all her life. The stone cold look in her eyes enhanced her pride, the elegance that was the Black family. She was too alike her ancestors, sending chills down the spines of everyone who knew the name of the Blacks. And, in the wizarding world, that was everyone.

She was the greatest example of them, the living replica of all those centuries of history. She gave a vessel to her ancestors, all of them pouring out of her posture and how she could easily rip apart someone who just her words, yet had the curtesy to never use it. She was a terrifying prospect to many, which was why they kept her so far away, yet close enough to keep an eye on her. Close enough that, if they were ever in need, they would trick themselves into thinking they could use her.

In truth, Remelda Black never did anything she didn't want to. Not anymore. As the feared woman she had created, she chose her battles yet gave off the impression that others coerced her into it. No, she was always one step ahead and she would never send herself into something she could not win. That was why she made a damn good lawyer, and why she rarely lost a case.

But in this house, the one she had locked away from her memory for so long, the one that haunted her dreams, she didn't feel like that woman. Others may perceive her as the same, but she felt like the little girl that once lived there with her family. With her brothers, who grouped with her as they attempted to comfort themselves, afraid of their own parents.

Now, Orion and Walburga Black would fear their daughter. She was a force of nature, how bone-chilling. The thought alone could cause a smirk to appear on her face, she was too proud of that. Good thing pride looked positively amazing on her.

She reviewed the material of her oncoming case, a terrible one she was sure to lose. Remelda was always given those cases, she always won them as well. She took a sip of her wine, always enjoying the taste of it even when she was too young to drink it legally as she mingled at the parties she was forced to attend with her family. Those were just bad memories now.

Remelda looked over the names of the case, the basic facts that everyone knew. She had yet to meet her client, to get their side of the story, but by the file it wasn't looking good for them. Never mind, she could work with that.

"Remelda," she looked up to see her ex-husband there. Remus did not land with good genes for his older age. He appeared twenty years older than he was, which was sad, and Remelda hated that after all these years she still took a sick satisfaction from it.

She was too fine with the fact that her husband divorced her. It wasn't for someone younger, they were only in their early twenties when they got married, any younger would looked so wrong. It wasn't because he had stolen her money and no longer needed her or because she wanted to leave his child. No, he loved Calypso almost as much as she did – there could never be anyone else in the world who loved her daughter as much as she did.

No, Remus always struggled with self-love. He never felt enough, he always felt as if he was dragging others down, felt as though everyone would leave him when they realized he wasn't enough. Remelda knew that. And when that did happen, when James and Lily were killed and Sirius was sent to Azkaban – without even a trial – all his worst fears came to life and he isolated himself.

He made the final step, gave the final blow, and finally delivered the papers with an apology. She signed them without another thought, but not before telling him that he was worth everything in the world. And, for a long time, neither Nadia nor herself heard a word from him. It was sad, of course it was, but Remelda had others things to worry about, like their child.

Their precious Calypso. Her world.

"Yes, Remus?" she asked. She set down the case file, standing up from the table, her glass of wine still present and waiting for her. She would finish it later.

"Nadia needs you. She's in the bathroom," Remus told her and she nodded.

"Thanks for getting me," she told him, "I'll take care of it, so don't worry. Oh – Nymphadora's coming around tonight for dinner."

She softly smiled at the way his cheeks turned pink, though she didn't comment on it. Remelda knew Remus, probably better than anyone else when it came to love, and she understood that he would never allow himself this pleasure that was her younger cousin. It was easy to tell that the both of them were gone for each other, and it was clear that Nymphadora was helplessly trying to gain his attention, even easier to tell that Remus was sending her away.

She hoped he learned that he was worth her love soon. Just like he was worth her own. It doesn't matter anymore, her love for Remus diminished and how he was just a friend.

Remelda walked out of the room, going up the stairs and past the portrait of her mother (she tensed as she passed it, as she always did) until she was turning to the bathroom of the room that Nadia was staying in. She knocked softly on the door. "Nadia?" she called out quietly.

Everything was quiet in the house, she hated it even though she still contributed to it. Some things never changed, some things always stayed in her muscle memory – this was one of them.

The door opened to reveal a red-eyed Nadia Greene and Remelda felt herself soften at her. "Oh, sweetie," she said, walking into the bathroom and closing the door.

"It's one of his worst days," Nadia told her, sniffling as she wiped the rest of the tear streaks from her face. "He won't talk to me."

Remelda nodded understandingly. Life was hard for Sirius now. The house was terrible for him, all of the bad memories, it was just another prison for him. From Azkaban to the place he always sought to escape as a child.

"I'm sorry," she consoled Nadia, reaching to place a hand on her shoulder and rubbing for comfort.

"It's not your fault, Remelda, I know that not every day can be good, but it's still so sad," Nadia sniffled again, turning to the Black woman.

"Still, I'm sorry that he won't talk to you," Remelda said.

"It just – it reminds me of Maia," Nadia confessed, "She was in a comatose state and it scared me so much. When he has these days...it reminds me of her and I am so scared. I don't know how to stop being scared."

Remelda brought her friend into a hug, holding her and rubbing circles into her back. "It's alright. He'll be fine, some days he can't cope but that doesn't mean you're going to lose him. You didn't lose Maia."

"But didn't I?" Nadia asked her in a whisper, looking terribly fragile, "She hasn't written. I'd be in the dark if it wasn't for Calypso keeping us updated on her. She hates me now, all because I never told her. But I – I never knew how to, I thought it didn't matter. I raised her, she's my daughter, but apparently she doesn't see it the same way as me."

Remelda looked at her for a moment, feeling guilty for bringing the twins to her in the first place, all those years ago. She felt guilty for never telling them herself, for never forcing Nadia to tell them. She regretted not taking them to an orphanage, but also, she could never regret such a thing. She had to watch over them, because if she didn't, they could be dead. He could've killed them, just like he killed their mother.

"You aren't going to lose her, she just needs some time to think," Remelda told her.

Nadia stared right back into her eyes. It was sad, how Nadia's eyes used to be such a vibrant blue and how they faded over time. No twinkle anymore after all the lose she had endured. "Thank you, I needed this. Can you – can you check on Sirius for me? Just to make sure he's okay?" Nadia asked.

Remelda nodded. "Of course. Now, straighten herself up. There's wine in the kitchen, pour yourself a glass," and with that, she left the bathroom and went down the hall to where her older brother stayed.

She knocked softly on the door to alert him of her presence. Not waiting for a response (though she doubted she would even receive one), she opened the door and shut it behind her. There, lying on the bed, was her brother. She got the chair sitting at the desk and brought it right in front of him.

"Nadia's worried about you," she told him, as if making idle conversation.

"I don't think she wants me to know that," Sirius roughly said back, voice gruff from how little he used it. If he wasn't yelling during an Order meeting, he was strictly quiet and alone in his room.

Remelda shrugged, "Probably not, but I thought it better than to make up an elaborate lie when it's obvious as to why I'm here."

"You don't want to visit your dear older brother out of the concern in your own heart?" Sirius joked, a pained smile spreading on his face.

It reminded her of the times before, when he had been so carefree and young. Before that youth was ripped from him. But this wasn't him. This was the shell of that man, filled with all negative feelings, happiness foreign to him.

Remelda peered at him, not commenting on how tired he looked, as if he hadn't gotten a wink of sleep since he had arrived there. He probably hadn't gotten a good night since he was in his early twenties and living with Nadia. Before.

"I don't need to check up on you, I know exactly how you'll be before I enter your room and I don't have the time to play," Remelda said, "I just got another case today."

"One that you can win?" Sirius asked her, though he didn't look at her. He looked past, out the window where the light was shining. How he dreamed of being out there, the sun pouring down on his skin.

"Not by the looks of it, no," Remelda told him, crossing her legs.

"So yes?"

"Of course," she nodded, "All my cases are the same. It looks like I will lose, but somehow I always come out on top. There's no need to even entertain the thought that I'll lose this one."

"How cocky," Sirius commented softly, no burn in his voice even though the trait he attributed to her wasn't good.

"I prefer the term prideful. It suits me more than cocky does," Remelda told him. "But no matter, how are you doing today?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Sirius questioned, "I don't know why I even stay out here, it gives everyone false hope. Every time I see Calypso, I know she dreams of days when we can have adventures together – when I'm free."

Remelda looked at him. "Perhaps, but don't underestimate her. She's used to keeping Regulus a secret. The adventures she's had with them, though not grand, have been good enough. Just like yours will be when you finally come out of your room."

"It's hard, Mel," Sirius lamented.

"I know," she told him, "Believe me. I may not know everything that has happened to you, nor can I relate to it, but I understand this pain."

Sirius' eyes met hers, a sharp look in his eyes that, if she were not as cold as she was, could make her shiver. "We both know that I'll never be free. I'll spend the rest of my days waiting in the shadows, locked in one house to another. I should just turn myself in or die already."

It felt as though a sharp sword impaled her, though she did not show it. This was her brother being vulnerable, she would not show how much it pained her to hear how he felt. "Do you dream of your death?" she asked him, keeping her voice void from emotions.

Sirius nodded, another sharp knife in her heart. "It feels so soon to me."

"Nonsense," she replied, "You're not going to die any time soon, don't even entertain the thought."

"How can you be so sure?" he asked her, sitting up in his bed to better meet her gaze.

She gave him a cold stare, the one that bored into his soul. "Because if there ever was a situation where you died, I'd be right there with you and I'd take your place," she told him earnestly.

He shook his head and it was clear that he hated hearing those words. "I can't ask you do that – I don't want you to do that," he told her.

"Sirius, I have lived long enough without you and I would rather die to save you than lose you again," Remelda admitted to him. "If that is the future, then let it be. I'd die happy."

"I don't want you to die at all," Sirius told her harshly, looking at her with a wild look.

"Neither do I, but I would rather die than watch you go," Remelda said before standing up. She placed the chair back at the desk. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a case to look over."

So, Remelda left the room with Sirius looking at her retreating figure, tears sprung in his eyes.

✦

CALYPSO STARED AT the wall where the door that held so many memories for her would appear. It would be the same door, she had seen it many times two years ago when her uncle inhabited the room, but she knew that the room was much different. It was always changing, different for each use that the inquirer presented, for everyone had a different need and it never denied.

Birdie and Lee were beside her, looking at her with a wild look. "This is where our meetings are supposed to be held?" Birdie hissed quietly. "This is a dead end!"

"Hush," Calypso turned to her friends, "Just, you know the request, right?"

The two nodded. "I still don't see what's going to happen," Birdie told her.

"Didn't I already say to be quiet? Now, let's all think it, it'll appear," Calypso said, chanting the phrase she had decided on with Harry and his friends days before.

It was when they got the coins that Hermione enchanted. It would burn when the signal of a new meeting was set, and it was handed to all the members. And when they handed them out, they told everyone the phrase to use when they reached the corridor.

"Okay...." Birdie trailed off, unsure, but still Calypso knew that she would comply.

The three of them thought it and soon, the door appeared. Birdie blinked, taking a step back as she was unsure of herself, and Lee let out a chuckle of surprise. Calypso just grinned, racing to open the door with the others following after her.

They entered the room, already seeing Harry, Ron, and Hermione there. Calypso looked around, taking in the room and all of the supplies. It was brilliant. But the room was always brilliant, it was perfect for her uncle two years ago and it was perfect for them now.

Her heart ached when she thought of her Uncle Pads. She didn't know how he was doing because it wasn't as if she could ask about him in the letters she sent home to her parents and it wasn't like they could write anything back to her. So, she was left in the dark about him. But, she reminded herself, Christmas was coming up and soon she would be able to check in on him.

"Hey guys," Calypso greeted when she got over to where Harry was standing with his friends.

"Hey, Calypso," they all chorused.

"Man, this room is so cool!" Lee exclaimed, looking around at all the different items lying around the room. He reached out his hand to touch something but Birdie slapped it away.

"Don't touch anything, we don't know what any of this shit is! It could be dangerous!" Birdie scolded him but he just shook his head.

"And we'll never find out if we don't investigate it," he said back to her and Calypso could see how she was fighting off a fond smile directed towards him. She couldn't help but snicker at the sight.

"So," Calypso turned back to him, "Simple, right?"

Harry nodded, "And I think partners would be good. They can switch every couple rounds, just so everyone has the chance to practice on someone else."

"Brilliant!" Calypso complimented him, "It also lets everyone get a chance to meet each other and get to know everyone."

"Wonderful," Ron commented and Hermione elbowed him, causing him to emit a sound of pain.

The door opened again and more people poured him. They waited for a couple more minutes as others found the place before seeing everyone enter. Fred and George stood near Lee and Birdie, with Maddox and Kiara trailing after them. Many people still stared at the Dean-Valance girl, which was sad, but there was nothing Calypso could do about it.

Finally, Maia entered the room and stood near the back to where Calypso almost couldn't see her. Still, she sent her younger cousin a smile and got a small one in return.

"Right," Harry started, shuffling awkwardly as he hated having all the attention on him, "Glad to see all of you could find this place all right."

"Hey, what is all this stuff?" Neville asked, looking around at all the gadgets. The students murmured about what they thought it all could be.

"Loads of Defense Against the Arts equipment. Hopefully we'll be able to get to all of it before the end of term," Harry explained.

"Until we do, don't touch it," Calypso added, "We aren't really sure what all is yet and we don't want any accidents. Is that clear?"

She gave everyone the infamous Black stare, perfected by her mother and practiced now by herself. She watched everyone nod, some of the younger kids eyes widening in fear from her gaze and she couldn't help but smirk.

"You need to understand something before we start, though. Defending yourself from the Dark Arts has less to do with magical ability and more to do with thinking fast and a lot of luck," Harry told everyone.

"Use your gut instinct, too, that always helps," Calypso addressed the crowd.

Harry nodded at her before telling them, "We'll be doing Expelliarmus tonight, though hopefully we can move on to other things if we have time."

"Oh please," one of the boys rolled their eyes, Calypso remembered him as one of the people who spoke out at their original meeting in Hog's Head, "Professor Lockhart taught us that in second year."

"Are you sure that remember it, though? It's just to start off simple, ease into this before going for the hard stuff," Calypso said.

"And Lockwood didn't teach as much as prune himself," Ron added.

"Besides, it works. I used it against You-Know-Who last June. It saved my life," Harry said and a hush fell over the crowd. Maddox looked down.

"Right," Calypso broke in, ending the silent, "Well, let's split into pairs and give it a go."

They did, minus Calypso and Harry who watched them. It was clear to pick out who would group with who before it happened. Birdie went with Lee, Fred with George, Maddox with Kiara. Seamus and Dean got together, Hermione with Ron.

They walked around, Harry giving more praise and encouragement than Calypso, who just watched with an assessing eye. Encouragement had never been big at her house. Remelda definitely praised her sometimes, but there was never much of it and Calypso never found herself needing more.

Calypso saw Harry clasping Neville on the back as he successfully takes his opponent's wand, cheering that he succeeded. Calypso felt proud of him.

She watched Birdie win against Lee and then when the roles were reversed. She winked at her friend whenever the match was over. She looked at the others, watched people she didn't even know the names of.

They were all doing well, some better than others, but she knew that with practice everyone would be amazing. Soon, two hours had passed as they practiced and they were all tired so Harry and Calypso stood at the center again.

"Okay, everyone. We've done a lot today, and I've seen some great improvement. That's it for now. We'll meet back here first Tuesday after Christmas break!" Harry told everyone.

They watched the people trickle out, only a few at a time so it didn't look too suspicious. When it was finally just Harry, Calypso, Ron and Hermione, then Birdie and Lee, the Potter boy turned to her.

"What do think we should do next time?" Harry asked her and she shrugged.

"Not sure. I'll ask my dad over Christmas, see if he can give any tips and I'll check my old textbooks," Calypso told him. "Well, see you later guys!"

She waved at the group before joining her friends, who were trying to decide who was the winner of their session. Calypso rolled her eyes at them but a smile remained on her face. They walked out of the room, watching the door disappear behind them before going down the steps.

"I'm telling you, I beat you at least two more times than you go me," Birdie said.

Lee shook his head, "Nuh-huh. If anything, we were even."

"No we weren't!"

"We might as well been," Lee said, "Come on, can't we just call it a tie?"

Lee gave her a look that Calypso knew was making her melt. She did have a soft spot for the boy. Soon, Birdie was sighing as she agreed, "Fine, it's was a tie."

"Yes!"

Birdie laughed at him and Calypso did as well. Lee didn't seem to mind as he placed his arm around Birdie's neck, seemingly not noticing the blush that formed on her cheeks. Calypso however did notice and sent the girl a look only to receive a glare in response.

"You guys both did good," Calypso told them.

"Awe, thanks, Cal," Birdie said, "That means so much coming from you."

Calypso rolled her eyes, "Shut up, Ramona."

Birdie made a loud noise of offense, "I can't believe you! Betrayed by my own friend! You know we don't use that name in this school!"

"Oh, my bad, how could I ever make it up to you?" Calypso sarcastically asked.

"Beg for my forgiveness," Birdie deadpanned, looking at Calypso before breaking out into a wide grin and laughing, "I'm just kidding! But seriously, don't use that name."

"Fine, fine. I won't," Calypso agreed and Birdie nodded.

"Good."

Calypso looked at them for a moment. They looked so happy and she couldn't help but smile. She was happy, she was really happy, and the wound on her hand no longer burned. No, she was more than fine.

She was leading an uprising and that felt better than any mark that Umbridge could force upon her because she knew that she would come out on top. She just couldn't wait to see the woman fall to her demise, it would be so sickeningly sweet to witness.

notes
this was written in comic sans. also can you believe that this is chapter thirty and we still have a while to go before this book is over??? like this book is just so long but it's also my pride and joy.